A/N: Well, I'm finally done with my essays for university, so I figured I could use my time for something a little more productive and a lot more enjoyable, like writing a new chapter for this fic. Thanks to those of you who reviewed for the last one, I'm really grateful! Your feedback makes me happy. For those of you who were hoping for more action, just hang in there until the next chapter, there'll definitely be some there. And looking at the plan for the story after that, there should be a lot more action in subsequent chapters too. So I hope you'll stick with it. And I hope you enjoy reading this chapter. :) And I totally overused the word 'chapter', didn't I?

NEVER EVER

We sometimes can't help but crash into reality
And realise how pitiful that makes us.

Chapter Twenty: Disquiet

You know that saying 'I slept like the dead'? You think it's supposed to apply to the way you feel after you wake up too? Just wondering, because when I finally wake up after midday, I feel just as spaced out and exhausted as I would do if I hadn't had any rest at all. My sleep addled brain seems to have forgotten my adventures on the roof with Violet last night, but as soon as I sit up to stretch, my muscles waste no time in painfully protesting against any sort of movement. For a few seconds, I sit frozen in place, gritting my teeth and debating whether to just ease myself back down and go to sleep again, but my stomach makes the decision for me when it decides to get vocal in its pleas for sustenance.

I consider going to find Hwoarang, but I'm still pissed at him about that little incident last night. I can't believe he stood there and let Christie think that we were planning to... you know. Ugh, as if I would anyway! I didn't believe his explanation for knowing that secretary had a sexually transmitted infection then, and I still don't believe it now. 'One of my buddies'. Yeah, Hwo, sure.

I drag myself out of bed, trying to ignore the nagging pain as I stretch out my stiffened limbs and get dressed. My mind, still fuzzy with sleep, drifts onto the subject of what Miharu told me last night. Just what was it that Heihachi did to Jin? Why would he leave him for dead? I didn't want to believe it yesterday, but if he betrayed his own grandson in such a way, he'd have no problem at all in lying to someone like me, would he? And because of him, Jin's gonna be stuck being Jin-but-not-Jin for the rest of his life. This whole thing is his fault.

I remember the email Jin sent me; how it said that Heihachi was searching for those who shared his bloodline. And then there's what he said to me in the gardens... So ending the Mishima bloodline... that's his way of getting revenge on Heihachi for whatever he did? I didn't even realise the full implication of what he was saying at the time, 'cause I was so shocked at the idea of Jin even thinking about killing anyone. The fact that he's part of the bloodline he's planning on ending didn't even register with me. But if he's cursed with sharing a body with this spirit... Then maybe, for him, the idea of living with that is the greater of the two evils? How can I possibly let that happen, though? There has to be some other way, I refuse to believe those are his only options. Even if he seems to have accepted it, I won't. I can't.

An evil spirit that preys on people with an extreme desire for revenge... But isn't it only natural to want revenge if someone you trust betrays you? It just all seems so... unfair.

The soft warmth of the sun on my face brings me out of my thoughts, and I glance around in surprise. I guess I must have been on autopilot while I was puzzling all this out, 'cause I'm halfway down the gravel path that leads to the lobby entrance. The trees shiver as a strong breeze blows by, and I zip up my jacket and shove my hands in my pockets. My stomach grumbles, reminding me of its earlier request. Right, I guess it's time I got myself something to eat.

I decide to take the scenic route to the cafe, following the little winding path through the flower garden, breathing in the cool air and trying to clear my head of all thoughts of bloodlines and revenge. Hey, the walk seems to be doing me a little bit of good already anyway, I can finally feel my sore joints loosening up. It still hurts, but I guess I shouldn't be complaining. Was I really expecting to breeze through every match without so much as a scratch on me? That kind of thinking is Hwo's department. And both my matches have kinda clued me in to the fact that I haven't improved all that much since the last tournament. Which really sucks, but I really neglected my training over the last two years. So it's my own fault.

I slip out of my reverie long enough to become aware of the sound of muffled sobs nearby, and I turn the corner just in time to see Hwoarang pat Christie's back a few times while she cries, her face buried in his chest. He hesitantly puts his arms around her, and I stop, blinking stupidly and wondering whether to approach them or not. For some reason, I feel uneasy at the sight of them together. I guess it's 'cause this looks like some kind of private moment, and if it is, I don't wanna disturb them. I didn't think they'd got so close in such a short amount of time... Maybe they've been meeting up without me? Mind you, I wouldn't blame them. I have been a moody sort these past few days, they'd probably have a lot more fun without me sitting there being all scowly. Still... I'm kinda confused. Not sure how to handle this situation. A hasty retreat would probably be my best bet.

Before I get chance to make said retreat, Hwo glances over and notices me. He says nothing, just gestures for me to come over, and Christie's scuffed up appearance finally registers. As I get closer, I catch sight of her bleeding knuckles and scraped forearms, and it dawns on me that she must've had a match today.

"I lost." she says, pulling back from Hwo and forcing a smile. Her face is streaked with dirt and tears, and I have absolutely no idea what to say to her. So instead, I fumble around for a tissue, finally locating one under all the sweet wrappers at the bottom of my bag.

"I... I really thought... I thought I could win..." She wipes her eyes with the tissue, and I can see her hands trembling. "But... there's no way to get Eddy's attention now, I guess."

"Maybe he's looking for you right now?" I offer. "I bet you'll find each other really soon."

Christie laughs and shakes her head, her eyes welling up again, and my throat tightens. I don't know how I'd feel if I'd come to the tournament and seen nothing of either Jin or Hwo, then had to pin all my hopes of actually getting to see them on winning the whole thing.

"You told me at the start how tough it'd be." Christie's saying. "But still, I really thought... I thought if I just did the best I could..." She trails off, smiling shakily. "I guess my best was nowhere near good enough."

"Christie..."

She's silent for a few moments, and I can see her face darkening. She's probably going over the mistakes she made during the fight. I always do that.

"Dammit!" she suddenly growls, slamming her fist against the wall. "I had so much fight left! I had so much more! Why the hell did I lose? Why couldn't I have won? Why couldn't Julia have..."

Her voice cracks, and I say nothing, thinking of my own sadness and frustration when I woke up in the infirmary after losing to Forest Law. I didn't have as much riding on my victory though, just a silly little promise that me and Hwo made, that I'd really wanted to keep.

"I guess... I guess there's no use getting angry." Christie says after a while, sounding tired. "I know why I lost, really. Dunno why I'm even asking why. My skills, they're what let me down. She was better than me. Simple, huh?"

"If that's the only thing that let you down, you should train harder."

"Hwoarang!" I elbow him hard in the ribs. Ugh. Trust him to be so blunt when she's obviously using all the strength she has left just to keep it together. He really needs to learn the meaning of the word 'tact'. Christie laughs and wipes her eyes again.

"No, you're right, Hwoarang. This tournament's been way tougher than anything I've ever done before. I was nowhere near prepared..." She sighs, pushing her tangled hair out of her face and readjusting her ponytail. "All these fighters, they're really something else."

"Still, there was no need to be like that." I grumble, glaring at Hwo, who's rubbing his side where I hit him.

"Uh, how about you quit whining, kiddo? She just said I was right."

Christie stretches, and for the first time today, I see a genuine smile from her.

"What's with the arguing, didn't last night go so well?"

Hwo grins, but before he can reply, I jump in.

"A total waste of time. He only lasted three seconds."

The look of outrage on his face is totally worth it. Guess the whole 'if you can't beat em, join em' thing does work sometimes after all.

"I hope you guys come to the next tournament." Christie giggles. "Of course, I'm gonna have to beat you both if I wanna win, aren't I? Hope you won't hold that against me."

"Next tournament?" I frown.

"Well, now I know what I'm up against, I can make damned sure I'm prepared next time. And when I win, I'll definitely get to see Eddy." She smiles. "Hey, maybe he'll even sign up for the next tournament! Then I can beat him too, for making me go through all this in the first place."

"You don't think you'll find him before that? I mean, who knows when the next one'll be?"

"...This tournament's the only lead I got, really."

"Oh..."

Would I be able to keep waiting, if I were in her shoes? Can I keep waiting? For a way to help Jin, for this whole thing to turn out okay in the end? I glance off towards the flower garden, back the way I came, and I'm not even that surprised to see him standing there. I'm too far away to see his expression, but he's definitely watching me. It's almost as if me just thinking about him like this somehow summoned him here. As always, my body unconsciously moves to approach him, but a sudden fear grips me and I stop before I even take two steps.

An intense pain, his unnaturally bright eyes, the soft, almost soothing sound of blood dripping from his claws, those markings trailing over his bare chest, the voice that's unmistakably him, but at the same time so different and then with a gently mocking smile, does it hurt, Xiaoyu?

"Guess you're not coming along?" Christie's voice.

"W-what?"

Hwoarang arches an eyebrow questioningly.

"Weren't you listening? We were gonna go get something to eat."

I glance over at Jin again. Did he do that? On purpose?

"Uh... sure, I'll come along."

Hwo doesn't even attempt to hide his surprise. Does he really think I'm that thoughtless as to run off after Jin when Christie's had such a sucky day? I mean, she seems to be doing better now, but still. Although, if I hadn't had that... 'vision' or whatever the hell it was, would I have gone over...?

I force myself not to look at Jin as we set off towards the lobby, as if that'll somehow make up for being such a selfish git. Jeez, I really have to work on my friendship skills. Christie needs to get a quick shower and a change of clothes, and Hwo suggests we take a look at the matchups for tomorrow while we wait for her, but to be honest, I think that's just an excuse for him to check out the receptionist. I chew my lip as I wait for my name to scroll up on the monitor, and after what seems like an age, it finally does.

10:00 a.m: Ling Xiaoyu vs Julia Chang.

What makes you wish to make it to tomorrow?
And decide to get past
Even the long, dark nights?
I want you to tell me someday.

--- End of the World, Ayumi Hamasaki