Falling from the Normandy, the Clone feels weightless, the Citadel surface rushing to meet her, the endless blaring of her implants, and the pain in her ears. It takes her longer to meet the ground than she expects. Her chest aches-heavier than the rest of her body. Maybe it's the air resistance, maybe it's the disappointment in Maya's face as she walked away. Finally, finally, the Clone sees clearly, for the first time. She only wishes she had seen it sooner.
"I know you're not Shepard." The voice calls from seemingly everywhere and nowhere at once.
The Clone freezes just past the airlock. She spins around, just in time to see the door's green light turn red. "The hell-?"
Maya rolls her eyes. "Somehow the Alliance kept Cerberus's old A.I."
"Not for long." The Clone slams the elevator open, heading for the A.I. Core. Strangely, it doesn't try to stop her.
"You know you can't shut me off without shutting down the Normandy."
The Clone walks through the medical bay, ignoring the A.I. until she's standing in front of its mainframe. "I won't have to." She opens her omni-tool, bypassing the security system, creating a feedback loop.
"Commander, what are you doing?" The petite, ebony-skinned woman eyes her from the bulkhead, just past the door. Who the hell is this?
"Just who do you think you are?" The Clone rears on her and is about to push her against the wall when she sees the woman's gaze drop to her chest. Aha.
"Ma'am...as the Normandy's Com Specialist, I really don't think it's a good idea to-"
"Are you questioning my command, Com Specialist?" She narrows her eyes, leaning so close she can almost kiss her.
The Com Specialist reddens, and her breathing quickens. "N-no, not at all." This is all too easy.
The Clone eyes her lips slowly, making sure she notices. She turns her head, leaning to whisper in her ear. "I see you eyeing me like a piece of meat." Jerking back, she snarls. "Get off my ship."
"Sorry?"
"Dishonorable discharge." The Clone practically spits, watching as the other woman's eyes widen. "Conduct unbecoming. Now go before I throw you off myself."
The A.I. wasn't the only one to see through her. All the night's practicing Shepard's tone and cadence. All the mornings spent mimicking her gait and her gestures. All the afternoons memorizing Shepard's story. All of it and she's still just a fucking copy. A mistake. Maya knew better, even as the operative tried to convince herself otherwise.
Maya presses the Clone against the bulkhead, also pressing her lips against hers. The Clone kisses back, but her mind keeps wandering. This cabin doesn't feel like their room back on Pragia. Even as she slides a hand down Maya's chest, her partner notices her tension.
"What is it now?" Maya groans, tightening her grip.
The Clone pulls back. "This doesn't feel right."
Maya frowns. "What doesn't?"
The Clone gestures around, shaking her head. "This-room. It doesn't feel like it's mine. Even now."
"Then make it yours." Brooks practically snarls as she marches over to Shep-the dead woman's desk, sweeping all her mugs and books into the trash can beneath. The Clone jumps at the noise. Then Brooks moves to the hamster cage and raises her hand.
"Wait!"
"What?" Brooks snaps. Maybe it's her time under cover. Maybe it's the strain of constantly changing their plans-The Clone hasn't seen Maya this angry since they left Hayeiana.
The Clone steps between her and the hamster. "I'll take care of it." Brooks looks like she's about ready to throw her into the trash-so she raises her voice and stands up straighter. "You clear out that display case."
While Maya is busy, the Clone escorts the hamster and its cage to the CIC herself, setting gently it on top of the trash bin. She appropriates one of the former Commander's datapads and writes a note.
Please send this to an animal shelter for proper disposal as a warship is not an appropriate place for a pet.
And how exactly is a six-month year old clone supposed to compete with a legend? She didn't grow up on the streets of Vancouver. She didn't lose her entire squad to thresher maws on Akuze. She certainly didn't save the galaxy from an indoctrinated Spectre and his army of Geth heretics. She never died.
What was it like? Dying? How long did Jane Shepard suffocate above Alchera before her heart and mind finally quit? Did time stretch out for her like it's stretching for her Clone? Did the pain even register after two years spent in nothing?
The Normandy takes off, and not a moment too soon. With that com specialist running loose, it's only a matter of time before the Alliance finds them out. Hopefully, with Earth saved, they won't care who exactly is flying the Normandy anymore.
Stopping in front of the flight map, the Clone rests her hands on the rails. Maya stops next to her, folding her arms expectantly. Where to now? She's about to set the coordinates for Earth when yet another person interrupts her.
"Ma'am, just before takeoff, Normandy registered a perimeter access alert. One of the security hatches."
Damnit. "Her." Why won't she stay dead? "Where?"
"Unknown. When we shut down the A.I. we disabled a lot of security systems. Shepard could be anywhere on the ship."
The Clone spins around, jabbing a finger into the merc's chest. "Shepard is standing right in front of you. Are we clear?"
Maya hops down from the nav panel, a daring smile on her face. "It's better this way. Wouldn't you rather take her down yourself?" She eyes her as she passes by, as if to say. Deliver on what you promised me.
"Armory. Find her! Slow her down." She moves to the elevator, first to the cabin to grab some unused armor, and then to the shuttle bay to plan her next trap.
Did it hurt coming back? Is Shepard even the same person after death and resurrection? The Clone supposes it doesn't matter. Nobody's going to spend a single credit bringing her back. Not when they can just make another clone.
The elevator opens, and the Clone hears three pairs of footsteps. Her implants label them as belonging to a pair of humans and a krogan. Shepard's nothing if predictable.
Stepping out from behind a stack of crates the Clone meets the original for the third time.
"Well, that's creepy." Shepard raises her gun, narrows her eyes, and fires.
Diving behind a different stack, the Clone fires back. "You want to stop shooting up my ship?
"It's not your ship." Shepard snaps.
"It will be. I've taken your name, your Spectre rank, even your fingerprints."
"And then you left me to die. Only I didn't. " Shepard closes in. "You think fake fingerprints are going to fool the Council? Or Hacket?" The Clone sneaks around the other side, looking to stab her in the back. "How's that big plan looking now?"
The Clone strikes. Shepard catches her in a bind just before her blade can make contact. Damnit. Commando training didn't cover swordplay. Apparently, neither did N7. They push at each other, each throwing in their equal strength into the bind, only to stumble backward when their blades protest.
Brooks provides cover while the Clone distances herself from Shepard. "Hatchett squad to the shuttle bay."
Did Shepard want to live when she was dying over Alchera? If she was given the choice-the Clone knows absolutely that Cerberus did not offer Shepard a choice-would Shepard choose to live again? With the way her and Alenko look at each other, maybe she would.
The Clone wonders what it would be like if Maya looked at her like that. The way Dreya would if she had lived long enough.
The Clone is starting to run low on medigel. She takes breaks to restore her shields before charging Shepard again. Just when she's flaring up, the Normandy swerves, knocking her into yet another pile of crates. Landing on the ground, and bracing herself against the stack, she opens her com directly to the pilot. "What the hell is going on up there? Get us out of the nebula and jump to FTL"
"Can't." The pilot grumbles in answer. "A skycar keeps blocking our path." For fuck's sake.
"Then shoot it."
The pilot doesn't answer, and the Normandy ducks and weaves several more times, without jumping.
"Dammit." The Clone practically shouts. "Launch the shuttle and blow that thing out of the sky!"
The Clone knew it was over the moment Maya walked away. Until then, she had always secretly hoped Maya, Rasa, Hope, whoever she was, would change. That somewhere in that polished exterior of hers, she had a heart still beating. Maybe Cerberus replaces the hearts of their operatives with batteries. Though, with the way Leng talked, Rasa never had one.
Shepard knocks her to the floor and they roll to the edge. Before the Clone can cant her hips, Shepard socks her in the face twice. The Clone feels those punches all the way down to her shoulders. She sees stars as she kicks Shepard off. Everything spins around her-is it her head or is it the Normandy? Maybe it's both. The Normandy swerves, and they both slip to the edge.
The Clone holds on for dear life. "Look at you. What makes you so damn special?" She snarls. "Why you and not me?"
"Hang on!" Right on cue, Shepard's squad carefully makes their way to the ramp to pull Shepard back. Wrex holds onto Kaidan's ankles as he crawls to the edge to take Shepard's hand.
"We got you!" Kaidan pulls her up, and Wrex pulls them both back into the safety of the shuttle bay.
Shepard laughs. "Thanks."
The Clone looks for Brooks, and she's standing in the distance, barely visible in the shadows. She shakes her head and turns away. Something inside the Clone breaks-like the explosion of a star. She's out in space-without any gravity to hold her in.
Wrex says something, but the Clone doesn't hear it. There's no sound in a vacuum.
Shepard kneels, smiling at the Clone since the first time they met. "Here. Take my hand."
There's no oxygen in a vacuum either. The Clone can barely spit her words out. "And then?"
Shepard gapes at her as she waves her hand. Take my hand, dumbass- she seems to say. "And then you live!"
"For what?" And the Clone lets go.