The next morning I woke up late. My eyes were heavy and crusted over with the remnants of last night's crying jag. I groaned and stretched, feeling exhausted, but starving. I slowly opened my eyes to the soft glow of the copper lamp.

There was no one in the room, so I got my stuff and went into the bathroom to take a quick shower and change. The warm water felt good on my skin, and I scrubbed at my face until it felt light and fresh. As I stepped out, I took a look at myself in the full length mirror. My skin was pale, seeing as I had not spent much time outside lately. There were bags under my eyes, and my burgundy hair was in need of a trim. Mary was right, too. I had lost weight. My hip bones were now protruding and my knees were scabby. I sighed and got dressed, removing the snitch necklace from around my neck and shoving it into my pocket.

When I walked back into the room, there was a girl with long black hair sitting on the bed next to Mary's. She jumped up at my entrance, and held a hand out for me to shake. "Hello. You must be Lin, from Gryffindor. I'm Jessica Peters."

I shook her hand. "Hi. I'm sorry, I must look horrible right now."

She smiled warmly. "No, not at all. You look tired, perhaps, but not bad. Are you hungry?"

I nodded. "Starving, actually."

"Good. I've brought you some food from the kitchens. You slept through breakfast, and Mary thought you might like something to eat when you woke up." She led me to the common room.

It was filled with the warm glow of daylight which came streaming through the windows. Even the air had a crisp smell to it that reminded me of the outdoors. There were a few people inside, scattered about on couches and chairs playing games and reading, most of whom managed to send a polite 'morning' my way. Jessica brought me to a table in the middle of the room, which had a plate on it that was piled high with fruit and eggs, and a goblet of what I guessed was pumpkin juice. I sat down and began to eat. "Thank you so much," I told Jessica in between bites. "This is awfully nice of you."

She waved me off with a hand. "Any friend of Mary's is a friend of mine."

"Speaking of which," I began after I had a gulp of juice, "where is she?"

Jessica blushed lightly. "She's… doing something. She'll be back soon."

I quirked an eyebrow, but continued eating. It felt to me like I hadn't eaten in days.

Just as I had popped a grape into my mouth, someone screamed. I choked and glanced wildly around. Jessica looked pained as she thumped me on the back. Everyone else in the room tensed. The screaming came closer to the room, until everyone could finally make out what was happening.

"-dare, Potter! You fucking idiot, leave her be!" Mary's yells turned my face red.

There was some muffled shouting, until James's voice roared, "SHIT!"

One of the Hufflepuffs closest to me grinned. "That'll have been the vinegar."

A few Hufflepuffs chuckled, and I sighed, standing up.

"Where are you going?" Jessica asked, panicked.

I turned to her and shrugged my shoulders. "You guys are so peaceful down here, and it's being disrupted because of me. I'm going to put a stop to it."

The Hufflepuff who had made the remark about vinegar jumped to his feet. I recognized him as the captain of the quidditch team, Thomas Freeman. "You don't have to, Lin. He won't be able to get in now. The vinegar keeps him from being able to enter."

"Vinegar?" I questioned.

"If you tap the barrel in the wrong pattern, you get doused in enchanted vinegar," Jessica replied, giving me a slight and shy smile.

I bit my lip. "Thank you so much for your hospitality. I know not many people outside of Hufflepuff get to see your dormitory, so I'm grateful I'm one of the few. But I really should stop this before it gets violent."

They nodded carefully. I gave them a little smile, returned to Mary's room and gathered my clothes, and then walked down the passageway to the entrance into the kitchen's corridor. As I got closer, the louder the screams became.

"She's my girlfriend!" James was roaring, red in the face. I exited the barrel quietly and watched them, unobserved.

"You bastard! After what you said to her last night, do you think she'll even want to be your girlfriend?" Mary retorted angrily. "Merlin, you should have seen her. She looked so broken, and it's all. Your. Fault!" She punctuated the last three words with a poke into his ribs after each word.

James's face paled, and I took this moment to step out from behind the shadows of the barrels. Mary noticed me first. She blinked in surprise. "I thought you were still asleep."

"I've just woken up, actually," I said quietly and watched James as he turned towards me.

He looked like he hadn't slept at all. He took a step forward, reaching out a hand to me. "Lin," he croaked, his voice hoarse from yelling.

I took a step backward and held out a hand to him, motioning for him to stop. "James, I am ashamed and embarrassed. Did you know everyone in the Hufflepuff common room can hear you? Stop it."

He started to say something but I cut him off. "I don't want to hear it. I don't want to hear anything you have to say right now. You insulted not only me, but also Ary, who didn't deserve your anger. She grew up with you, and you called her a slut, basically. I'm sick of your behavior. I had thought you'd grown up from the boy who bullied me last year, but you haven't. You're the same egotistical, selfish boy. Leave me alone."

"Lin," he pleaded.

Tears began forming in my eyes. "Don't. I mean it. Leave me alone."

He took a step towards me. I drew my wand. "Impedimenta!"

He froze instantly. I turned to Mary, who was watching me carefully. "Thanks for letting me spend the night, Mary, but I should probably head back to Gryffindor Tower now."

She nodded and rushed to me to envelope me in a hug. "I love you, Linny dearest, and you're welcome back anytime. Just ask Crumpet to fetch me."

I smiled and made the journey back to Gryffindor Tower. I passed students on the way, but ignored them for the most part, as they ignored me in return. It was a different story, however, once I got to the Fat Lady.

"James Potter has been looking for you all morning, you know," she informed me as I drew closer to her.

I didn't even bother to reply. "Oddment."

She swung forward, and I stepped through the opening. I was greeted by several people at once. "Lin!"

I smiled weakly. Jane, Carly, Georgie, and Albus gathered around me, pulling me into a group hug. Jane brushed my bangs and looked into my eyes. "Oh, Linny, I'm so sorry."

I felt a few tears trickle out of my eyes. "No, it's not your fault. I just… can I go back to bed, now?"

Georgie nodded and led me up the stairs. "Of course, dear. If we had known what was going to happen, we would have never let you leave. You should have come to us yesterday."

"I just, I needed a break," I replied softly. "Can I be left alone? I want to sleep."

She nodded and closed the door softly behind her. I looked at the door for a few moments before crawling into my bed. I didn't sleep, though. I cried. I cried for what seemed like hours, hugging my pillow tightly.

Like I have said before, I had dated before James Potter came into my life. I had had a few boyfriends, but none of them had ever made me feel this way. Whether I had broken up with them, or them with me, I had never felt helpless, like I was being suffocated by an unknown presence. I felt exhausted, emotionally and physically. I felt like I wanted to die.

Even when Kyle had cheated on me, I had been able to retaliate, and, though I was sad for a while, I knew I would get better. I didn't feel that way this time, and he hadn't even cheated.

After a while, the tears slowed and then finally stopped. I was finally able to fall into a dreamless sleep.

When I woke up, it was night again, and I could see all three of my friends' forms curled up in their respective beds. I rummaged quietly through the drawer of my nightstand, looking for the watch I had abandoned months earlier in favor of my snitch necklace, which I swore to never wear again.

The clock's face said it was close to 4 in the morning. I sighed as I got up and rummaged through my trunk, pulling out a bag of chocolate and an Agatha Christie mystery novel. I soon fell into the familiar rhythm of murder, deceit and suspicion.

"Lin!" Jane's voice shook me out of my concentration on the plot.

I looked up. "Huh?"

"How long have you been up?" Jane sat at the end of my bed, looking like she had just woken up, which, in all likelihood, she had.

"Since about 4. What time is it?" I asked as I searched around for my watch.

She checked her own. "About 8:30. Would you like some breakfast?"

I blanched. "Would that involve going downstairs?"

"No, I'll bring it up, I promise." She sighed and ran a hand down her face. "I'm so, so sorry, Lin. Reggie told us all what happened."

I turned red and started picking at my comforter. "I had forgotten he was there."

"Do you want to talk about it?" Jane asked softly.

"Maybe later," I mumbled.

She patted me on the head as she stood up. "Okay. I'll go get you something to eat."

I nodded and went back to my book. Georgie and Carly also soon woke up, and, after reassuring me they loved me, left for breakfast. Once I was completely alone I began to cry again, but silently. I didn't feel broken, but I did feel damaged.

The rest of the day was much of the same. I alternately slept, read, and ate, thanking Jane profusely for keeping me well fed. Everyone else stayed away, which I was grateful for. I needed to be alone, to process and to heal.

I thought a lot about what James had said, and I decided, on the whole, he was wrong. Ary was in a committed relationship, and everyone I knew had never brought up my financial status. They were fascinated by the fact that I was American, but that novelty had already run out, and no one really mentioned it anymore.

The thing that still bothered me was his ice queen comment. I tried to rationalize it in my mind, but I couldn't get over it. I was still worrying over it by the time night fell, and Jane approached me.

"Lin?

I glanced up from where I had been pouring over my Potions' textbook. "Yeah?"

"Do you want to stay in the room tomorrow?"

I chewed on my lip and looked over her shoulder and out the window. "Yes. Is that bad?"

"No." Jane sat down and put her hands on either side of my face. "But you need to go to classes some time."

I sighed. "If you and the girls can get my work for tomorrow, I promise I'll go to class on Tuesday."

"Okay." Jane smiled hesitantly. "Are you feeling any better?"

I smiled back. "Yeah, but I think I just need another day before I can face him."

Her eyes darkened. "We won't let him come near you, I promise. Even Jack and Reg aren't talking to him."

I laid back against the pillows. "Thanks. I'm really tired."

She took the hint and closed the curtains silently around me. I felt bad, but I didn't want to talk about him, and I was really tired. I fell asleep within minutes.

When I woke up the next morning, after a night of nightmares and tossing and turning, everyone was gone, but a plate of food was on my desk. I ate quickly, and soon got to work studying and trying to compile a list of things we could do for Ary's bachelorette party.

After a few hours of this, I pulled out a Jane Austen novel and immediately surrounded myself with 19th century England. I sighed and put a hand to my heart. "Oh Jane, I wish I lived in your world. There are always good guys to negate the losers."

"Would you call me a loser, Lin?" a voice whispered next to my ear.

I screamed and jumped, landing in a heap on the floor next to my bed. James was watching me warily on the other side of it. My jaw dropped, and I spluttered, "What? Why? How?" I grabbed my chest and breathed heavily. "Never mind, out!" I pointed towards the door.

"No," he said simply and sat on my bed. "We need to talk."

"You, you, you-," I struggled to find the words. "You prat."

He smirked. "Nice use of the word."

I screamed wordlessly and launched a book at his head. "OUT!"

"No!"

I launched several more books, but he dodged them all with ease. I groaned and finally got up, unwilling to touch him. I sat on Carly's bed and stared at him. "The girls will be back soon."

"No, they won't. They all have double Herbology."

I cursed, and he raised an eyebrow at me. "What do you want?" I crossed my arms over my chest.

"I already told you. I want to talk." He mimicked my posture.

"Oh, you want to talk. Maybe you want to call me a couple more names? Or complain how you never get any? Or maybe you just want to make me feel worse than I already do!" I accused, refusing to cry.

His face became sad and hurt. "I'm so sorry, Lin," he mumbled. "I didn't mean any of it."

"But you said it." I hugged my knees to my chest. "You said it."

"I know." He sounded miserable. "I'm so sorry."

"Stop apologizing," I snapped.

"Not until you forgive me," he answered sadly.

I stood up and gathered my textbooks from my desk and lugged them to Carly's bed, which was directly across from mine. "Don't hold your breath."

I ignored him as I worked on my Charms' essay. He was quiet for all of five minutes before he started talking. "I've never been up in the girls' dormitory before. It's quite like ours, actually. Except we only have 3 beds, you know. Although, this room did, too, now that I think about it, before you came." He paused to take a breath, and then continued. "I've always wondered about the staircase, you know. Why is it that Gryffindor's the only one that has that Chastity Charm? Ravenclaw and Slytherin don't, that much I know, and, well, you're the only non-Hufflepuff –"

"SHUT UP!" I threw my Charms book at him. He dodged and I took in several deep breaths. "I can't concentrate! Look at this, my essay's now a God damned mess, and it's all your fault." My voice hitched. "It's all your fault."

To my extreme embarrassment I proceeded to burst into tears. I was really sobbing, and it was a disgusting mess, with snot everywhere. I curled up into the fetal position, wishing I had never met James. I heard my bed creak and a weight shift next to me.

The next thing I knew James was cradling me to his chest. I began smacking it. "You're such a bastard!" I cried.

"I know," he whispered and held me closer.

I relaxed and clutched his shirt. "I hate you," I said unconvincingly.

"I know."

I began to calm down, but stayed in James's lap. After a few moments of silence, I realized rain drops were hitting my head. I looked up, and was met with James's face. He was crying.

I sat up straighter and used my thumbs to wipe away his tears. "James."

He refused to look into my eyes and buried his face in my shoulder. "I made a mess of this, haven't I?"

"You hurt me, James. What am I supposed to do?" I wound my arms around his neck. "What would you do?"

"I was just upset. I'm so sorry, Lin." He pressed his lips to mine. "I'm so sorry."

I sighed and moved so I was straddling him. "Show me."

He looked surprised. "How sorry I am?"

I nodded. He wiped the remaining tears from my face and used his thumb to cup my cheek. I leaned into it, and he swallowed noisily. His thumb brushed my bottom lip before leaning forward to kiss me. I felt my body go limp as his lips moved sweetly and slowly against my own. I moaned as his tongue darted out to trace my lips. His grip on me tightened, and he shifted so I was lying underneath him.

I could feel the fear he felt because he thought he was going to lose me in the way one hand gripped my hip tightly as the other one ran lightly up and down my side, and in the way his kisses were never rushed or demanding. I felt that he was trying to give me whatever I wanted, and asking for nothing in return. I was being loved.

I broke away from his kisses, and he regarded me carefully. "I believe you," I said breathlessly. "I believe you're sorry. But you have to understand, your actions have consequences. You can't just treat me however you want. I- I deserve more than that."

He nodded and rested his forehead against mine. "I know. I know that now. If you want to break up with me, I'll understand."

I moved my arms from around his neck so that they were gripping the lapels of his shirt. I pressed my lips to his briefly. "I can't do that. You see, even though you put me through a lot of shit this weekend, I came to the realization that I care about you. A lot. Besides, if I let you off the hook now, how will you ever learn?"

He flashed me a brilliant smile before kissing me again, this time much more passionately, and I returned it with equal vigor. My hands quickly untucked his shirt from his pants, and I set about unbuttoning it. He moved his kisses to my neck and then –

"OUT!" Carly roared, hitting James over the head with a broomstick. I recognized it as James's. He must have flown up here. Carly's roars of indignation soon snapped me back to reality. "OUT! I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU!"

James jumped up and grabbed my hand, pulling me with him as we slid down the stairs, which flattened as soon as James set foot on them. I blushed as I realized how disheveled we looked. Carly stood roaring in the doorway of our dorm. "AND IN MY BED, TOO! I'M GOING TO KILL YOU BOTH!"