We were heading back home. Again, Monika chose the music. What a very bad-ass choice, it was Blondie, that song in Bride of Chucky. Also in American Gigolo. What the fuck were those two movies?

Caffeine was rushing through me, and that song made that shit up to a hundred. While I'm driving and it's getting more bland, let's read some reviews... Segue's are weird.

TheDoctorWhoSpeaksInHands: Yuri's dream.

BulletsArePeopleToo: Yes, swearing and rants are the theme. Thanks for the compliment.

Heather: Hello, Tia. What's your damage?

Guest: ;)

AydenK: Aww, thanks.

Okay, that's it in the past few months. Any earlier and I will cringe.

AUTHOR: How do you know Tia?

ME: I am you. Sort of.

AUTHOR: Sort of is great. I don't want this to be an M. Night Shyamalamadingdong shit.

This is filler.

"Sherwood, Ohio," Monika sighed.

"What about it?" Yuri asked. "Is it those 'Heathers' Jeremy talked about?"

"No, no," Monika replied. "I kind of want to live there."

"Nothing exciting," I chimed in. "Yes, Monika, I was curious, and then I checked Google Maps. Empty old suburb. No people were out on the street view. Devoid of basically anything."

"Well, damn," Monika dissappointedly heaved. "But we live in an empty suburb as well."

"We live by a very busy Indian restaurant, just two blocks away from us," I enunciated. "There's a second-hand clothing store four blocks away from the place. Not to mention, we live 15 minutes away from the goddamned capital of the entire country!"

Sayori's eyebrows danced with agreement. "That is fair," she agreed.

"Agreed," Natsuki said.

"I wonder why you take us to the city rather than those close stores," Yuri contemplated.

"Because you're the fucking Dokis!" I said in a loud tone. "And I don't go out as much, so big excuse! You're like my roommates except hotter."

"Oh, fuck me," Monika chuckled in a sultry tone.

I thought about the reference. Of course, Heathers. "Gently with-"

"Gently with a fucking chainsaw, yes-thank you Jeremy," she slurred as if all of her words were rolling off the tongue and doing Evel Knievel shit. "We're two days in. Keep it professional."

"Professional?" Sayori blurted. "You masturbated to him last-"

"How the fuck did you know that?" Monika looked at Sayori with a steely eye.

"The bathroom, unfortunately, does not have adequate soundproofing," I fancily worded. "I think you can hear the drop of the water when people shit, and the porn they watch there."

"Oh, dear," Yuri was clearly appalled of the situation.

"I heard every single moan, every single slap every time the penis touches-"

"Okay, you do not need to detail everything," Monika conveniently dodged that bullet. I don't blame her, everyone jacks off at some point in time. I discovered the mighty power of the penis when I was ten. I humped a pillow.

AUTHOR: I'm so glad you agreed to this shit.

ME: I am you.

AUTHOR: No, you are Jeremy.

ME: That's very true.

"We're close to home," I stated.

"Finally," Monika sighed. "Let's not have a word of this."

Sayori was in the bathroom, peeing, and then after insert a tampon up her... you get what I mean. Natsuki, Yuri and Monika were watching the daily news. Child sexual abuse in Cape Reinga, the headline said. Huh. Cape Reinga was a place in New Zealand far up North of the North Island. Yes, we have two big islands. Apparently, the North and South hate each other.

"Let's go," I exclaimed.

"Go where?" Monika asked.

"Arcade," I stated. I was bored as fuck. Remember, my computer is broken.

Monika had a confused look. "Well-"

"Fuck me gently with a chainsaw?" Sayori's voice emanated behind us.

"Let her finish," Yuri said.

"Why are we going to some place right now, pronto?" Monika queried.

"I'm bored as fuck."

"Suggestion," Natsuki stood up. "Let's all take a shower first."

Monika looked Natsuki as if Natsuki was idiotic. "Collectively? All of us in a shower?" Monika questioned.

"Y-you pervert!" Natsuki blushed. "Stop inferring it in the wrong way."

"It would be a bit nice," Sayori snickered a little bit. "Warm-"

"And crowded!" I whined. "And I'd look like a sex offender, considering you, Sayori of all people, look like sixteen while Natsuki looks like she finished the third trimester!"

"What the fuck?!" Natsuki swore as a knee-jerk response. I don't blame her. That was harsh. "We're all eighteen!"

"Wait..." I paused. "What?"

Yuri fiddled with her the pocket of her dress and pulled out a wallet. "I actually have this when I was in the Literature Club," she folded open, with what seemed to be a passport. "I have passports. I wanted to go to France."

"What the fuck?!"

"Me too," Monika winced.

"And me," Natsuki nodded.

"And me," Sayori put the cherry on top. Weird metaphor.

"Who gave you those?"

Everyone winced.

"Who the fuck gave you those-"

"The author did," Natsuki slurred.

"Okay, what now?" I raised my arms in response and put it down swiftly.

AUTHOR: Yes, I actually gave them a device to give them U.S Passports and 18-years-old verification licenses, so...

NATSUKI: Yep, exactly. No, I'm serious. I'm literally 18. Bitch.

SAYORI: Me and Natsuki don't have panhypopituitarianism. Google it, reader.

ME: So... you can break the fourth wall.

MONIKA: We kind of need to continue the story...

YURI: Or else this will be like a chat log story, so fuck.

MONIKA: Don't communicate in pivotal moments. Breaks the flow.

ME: Well, fuck, we're all Deadpool.

"Okay, we're getting in a shower," Sayori said. "Who showers first?"

"Fuck..." I dragged the word. "I didn't think about that shit, so how about a game of Paper Scissors Rock?"

"It's Rock Paper Scissors," Yuri corrected.

"No, it's definitely Paper Scissors Rock. Have you heard the rhythm?" I backfired. "Paper scissors ROCK!"

"No, it's Rock Paper SCISSORS!" Monika grew a condescendingly angry face.

"Isn't it Roshambo?" Natsuki asked.

"You're foreign," I pointed to Natsuki briefly. "Goddamn Paper Scissors Rock. Are you-"

AUTHOR: 20 minutes later. This shit drags on.

"Oh, fuck off!" Monika hissed at me. "I, of course, can beat you!"

"Oh, really, sweet cheeks?" Natsuki said. "It's on, motherfucker."

"Jesus," I interrupted, as we walked to play the five additional seats of Mario Kart. All vacant. "Do you have to swear-"

Sayori sighed. I stopped. "It's a healthy competition, Jeremy," she explained. "They're friends.

"Hope we don't get to the part with the death threats," Yuri cheerily exclaimed in a sing-song voice. "It's on, bitches," she said as we all sat down.

Quickly fumbling with the controls, it seemed that the girls immediately went straight into an online mode, and soon I did.

"Hold on," Monika paused, the speakers crackling for a second. And then the sound of a palm muted guitar playing a continuous chord of F minor came. This was the greats. This was the shit. This was Pat Benatar. "Pick your characters."

I was Mario. Obviously. Yuri was Toad. Natsuki was Waluigi, surprisingly, and Sayori was toad.

"I'm this white-ass purple mustache man?" Natsuki swore. "You could've cast Robbie Rotten for this shit!"

"Pick your poison-" I was interrupted until the girls immediately played the power-up roulette. "Never mind."

"Let's play," Monika fiddled with the controls. "Kingdom Way, anyone?"

Natsuki accidentally turned the wheel left and selected the hardest course in the arcade.

"Wait-" Natsuki was interrupted.

"Good job, hero," I sarcastically inputted. "You picked the hardest one of them all."

"Bowser's Castle," Monika said coldly. "This is going to be lots of fun."

Surprisingly, the white-ass purple mustache Robbie Rotten won. Great. Despite raging as she was hit by a blue shell four times, she won by a few pixels ahead of me. I'm not salty at all.

Trying to cool my frustration down, Sayori and I decided to have a time together, since apparently she and I wanted to go in those light gun arcade games that take place inside like a cool little pod with the game projected all around us. It was like VR, but more expensive and less fair.

We went together, inside. It was a jungle game, like the new Jumanji movie except with outdated graphics. Seriously, it's the graphics of the first Temple Run. I don't blame them.

"Cool!" Sayori delightfully said as she strolled inside and sat on the rather slightly-uncomfortable seats. Monika, Yuri and Natsuki had already swiped their game, we swiped twice for both of us. Sayori's hands immediately jumped on the machine gun.

A voice emanated from the pod. "Welcome to the Lost Jungle Experience. To show the instructions, press the right trigger on the machine gun. To skip, press the left trigger on the machine gun."

Sayori impatiently pressed the right trigger.

Then, a Texan voice emanated from the pod again. "You have a machine gun right in front of you, and you need to press both triggers to fire it. Aim your machine gun to the enemies on the screen. In areas where you cannot use the machine gun, there is a rifle right beside you sitting in a compartment."

I quickly looked over to my left, where I was. "Holy fucking shit, there's another weapon."

"If you see two circles together, you and your friend need to shoot together at that circle," there was a short pause. "You have now finished the instructions. Now, enjoy the Lost Jungle! Yeehaw!"

And then later, shit was going down.

But, I'll end this part chapter.

Hi, guysssssssss

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