Happy Thursday, everyone! I've been writing basically non-stop these past few days and I've lost track of how much I've deleted and rewritten because I've been hating everything I do. Hopefully you lovelies enjoy this chapter! ~Shaymie

Lorin's POV

"Son of a bitch," I groaned, resting my head on the dining room table. My head was killing me. It was a miracle I had even managed to get downstairs without falling over. Gil clicked his teeth and shook his head as he put a stack of pancakes in front of me and started texting someone. I sighed as I started to eat.

"You should not have drank a whole bottle of wine, mon ami," he frowned. I glared at him as he sat next to me. He was the one who gave it to us! What the hell did he think would happen? "Alexander said you got a little, erm, wild last night."

I blushed. I knew what I was like when I was drunk, and I could remember bits and pieces from last night. I looked up as John came down the stairs, looking like a complete mess. I jumped from my chair and ran over to him, ignoring the dull thud I felt in the back of my head.

"What happened? Are you okay? Should we take you to the hospital? Where have you even been?"

"I'm fine, Lori. I just got in a fight yesterday," he shook me off and sat down at the table. I frowned and followed him. A fight? John was one of the most peaceful people I knew. He never fought anyone no matter how much they pissed him off. Who could make him so angry that he'd fight-

"Was it James?" His silence was all the confirmation I needed. So that's where he had been yesterday. Why the hell would he go after James, who had boxing classes three times a week? Was he just asking to get his ass kicked? "Are you an idiot?"

"Are you seriously asking me if I'm an idiot, Lori? You're fucking hungover! You got drunk at the park! What the hell were you thinking?" I flinched as he slammed his hands on the table and glared at me. He looked just like my father now. But John wasn't my father. He was nothing like him. He wouldn't punish me for talking back… Would he?

"I wasn't thinking. I just wanted to have some fun…"

"And what if Alex had decided to have some fun with you, like James? You can't do stupid shit like that, Lori. You barely know the guy. And you're not exactly the brightest person when you're drunk. You're lucky he didn't do anything."

"Alex isn't-"

"'He's not like James'? Is that what you were going to say? I remember you saying the same thing about James and your father and look at how that turned out! He was exactly the type of asshole you told me your father was! I mean, Christ, do you just go around opening your legs for anyone who pays you a compliment?" I heard Gil mutter a curse in French behind me, but I didn't turn to look at him. I could only stare at John, who now looked apologetic. It was a bit too late for that. Was that really what he thought about me? I cursed myself as tears rose up in my eyes. The last thing I wanted to do was cry in front of him.

"Go home, John," I heard Gil mutter angrily as he pulled me into a hug. I buried my face in his chest so they wouldn't see me crying. I hated being such a crybaby. I took deep breaths, breathing in the comforting scent of Gil's expensive cologne. It was the only thing keeping me grounded right now.

"Lori, I-"

"Go home, John. Pack up your things and leave." Gil's voice was firm, his chest vibrating as he spoke. I didn't look up as I heard the scuff of John's shoes against the tile. A few seconds later I heard another set of footsteps and felt myself being passed off to someone else. I relaxed slightly when I smelled the familiar scent of coffee and paper.

Alex and Gil talked quickly and quietly in French, and I wished more than anything that I knew what they were saying. The only things I could pick up were my name and John's. I sniffled and closed my eyes as Alex wrapped his arms around me. I was tired, my head hurt, and I wanted more than anything to go back to sleep. I wished that this was just a nightmare, but it wasn't. John hated me. He thought I was a slut. He was the one person I thought would be on my side, but like usual, I was wrong. Was anyone really on my side? It was a miracle everyone hadn't dumped me immediately. I was nothing but a burden.

I looked up as John came down the stairs, carrying a gray duffle bag and his backpack. His face was unreadable. He shifted the backpack onto his shoulder and left without a word. Alex and Gil glared after him and sighed as he slammed the door behind him. He didn't even look at me. Was I so disgusting that he couldn't stand the sight of me?

"He hates me… I fucked things up with him just like I do with everyone else I care about. It's no wonder Mama got rid of me."

"Lo, you didn't do anything wrong. And I'm sure he doesn't hate you-"

"He looked like my dad earlier. You didn't see it, but he was mad. Furious, even. I thought he was going to hit me. He had every right to. I talked back to him. I was being a bad girl. I deserved it. He should have punished me. He should have disciplined me," I shivered and smiled numbly as Alex hugged me closer, his hand rubbing my back gently. Talking back caused nothing but trouble. Talking back only got me punished. What was that thing people always say? "Talk shit, get hit?" I had learned the hard way that it wasn't just a saying, it was a rule of life.

"Breathe, Lorin. It's okay. Nobody's going to punish you," Alex murmured, pulling me over to a chair. I took deep breaths and scratched at my wrists. If they weren't going to punish me, I'd have to find a way to do it myself. Knives were out-Gil had moved them to a high shelf and there was no way I could reach them on my own. Pills were a no go. James had confiscated my medicine when I had talked back to him. There had to be something I could do…

"I should punish myself, then. It's not that hard. If I can't cut, then I should just scratch myself enough to break skin. It's not nearly enough, but it'll have to do for now…" I muttered quietly to myself as I looked around frantically for something to use. There was nothing, absolutely nothing. Maybe I could-

"Lorin, stop!" I jumped as Gil grabbed my hands and held them tightly. His eyes were full of tears. He was crying? Why was he crying? He wasn't the one who needed to be punished. Was he scared to give out the punishment? He shouldn't have stopped me, then... "You don't need to be punished! You shouldn't be punished! You… You don't have to hurt yourself!"

"James told me I deserve it. Maria told me I deserve it. My father said..." It was all I had known in life. Good girls got rewarded. They got showered in compliments and given the best of pleasures. They were safe. Bad girls didn't get any of that. They only got punishments and beatings. They had to get put in their place.

"They're not here right now, Lo!" Alex took a deep breath and brushed his hair back from his face. His hands were trembling as he leaned against the table. I could have sworn I saw a glimmer of tears in his eyes. "They can't hurt you anymore. You shouldn't get punished for anything. I don't even want to imagine what they did to you, but it won't happen ever again. As long as I'm alive, I'll make sure of it."

Gil and Alex made me stay home from school, even though I tried to tell them that tonight was the concert, and I couldn't perform if I didn't go to school. They refused to take no for an answer, which is how I ended up snuggled under layers of blankets and pillows in the living room while Alex watched over me. They didn't trust me enough to be alone.

Alex scribbled frantically in his notebook, balancing it precariously on his knee. I asked why we couldn't just go up to my room, where there was a desk, but he had gotten flustered and said that he could think better downstairs. Oh well. It was easier to watch him when we were on the same couch. It was always fun to watch Alex write. His eyebrows would scrunch up, his tongue slightly stuck out of his mouth, and occasionally he took the tip of the pen into his mouth as he tried to think of what to write next. He only ever wore his glasses when he was reading or writing, which I thought was a bit of a waste since they were pretty cute. I didn't know what he was writing, but figured it was none of my business. It was almost easy to forget what John had said...

"Do you open your legs for anyone that pays you a compliment?" I only had a vague memory of last night. I remembered kissing Alex at the park, my chest pressed up against him. I remembered complaining when he wouldn't fuck me. I remembered desperately stripping, trying to get his attention, trying to make him want me. Judging by the bulge in his jeans, I'd say he had wanted me a lot. But why didn't he take his opportunity, then? Any guy would be happy to have a horny, drunk girl willing to do whatever they wanted.

"Lo, your phone's ringing." I shook away the thoughts and looked down at the table in front of us. Alex wasn't like James, or any other guy I knew. He wouldn't do anything to hurt me. I managed to grab my phone before it vibrated off of the table. My fingers trembled slightly when I saw the name on the screen, and I took a deep breath before answering,

"Hi, Darcy."

"Hey there, Lorin. Sorry I haven't called much lately. Dad's being… well, Dad."

"What does that mean?" I frowned. I had only met Darcy's father a few times, when Mama needed someone to watch me while she "handled things" with Dad. Whenever I came back from their house over the weekend, she was always covered in an assortment of new bruises and could barely walk.

"He kinda… Found out about Heather. He wasn't too happy when he found out that we were dating and he kicked me out. I was staying with Heather for a little while until she broke up with me. And my job fucking fired me! Now I'm the laughingstock of the town. It's no wonder Mama left this place when she had the chance. It's full of assholes," she sighed. I heard her fingers tapping on something and twirled a bit of hair around my finger as I took in what my sister had said. She was currently homeless, in the middle of Nowhere, Texas. More specifically, a town that frowned on anyone who wasn't straight or white. I doubted anyone there would be willing to help an unemployed outed bisexual teenager who was known to sleep around a lot and wasn't afraid to let people know about it. They were probably running for the hills.

"What are you going to do, Dar?"

"It's funny you ask. I'm kinda already in New York anyway. Actually, I'm on my way to your house."

"What the hell, Darcy? A little bit of warning would be nice!"

"Ooh, gotta go! Talk to you later, Lori!" I blinked as my sister hung up on me and frowned. She was on her way here? Now? My sister was known for being impulsive and brash, but this was a completely different thing. This was sheer stupidity. How could she just pack up her life and go to another state out of nowhere?

"Who was that?" Alex asked, adjusting the blankets on my body slightly. He ignored the glare I gave him and set my phone back on the table. I wanted to be released from my fluffy prison, not locked up even tighter! How did he even managed to wrap blankets so tightly? This had to be some form of torture. Was this his solution to stop me from hurting myself?

"That was my sister. Apparently she got kicked out and decided to come here, but she didn't tell me… I wish she would tell me before she did stuff like this. I mean, I didn't even get to tell George and Martha and now she's already on her way here." I yawned as I finished speaking and put my head on Alex's shoulder. I was still sleepy from this morning, and I still had a bit of a headache. I knew I should have been getting up so I could make myself look somewhat presentable for my sister, but my cocoon was too comfortable, and I couldn't move even if I wanted to.

"Do you want to take a nap until she gets here? I'll wake you up." I nodded and closed my eyes as Alex started humming under his breath. I fell asleep as he started braiding my hair.