The three of them got out of the car, noticing that Lizzie was still asleep, Erin opted to attempt to pull her out of the car without waking her, and it failed. Lizzie grumbled and pushed Erin off. Not caring about her manners, she threw herself down on the couch. Her head still hurt.

Henry looked up from his book and furrowed his eyebrows at Lizzie. Erin motioned to the kitchen and Danny, Henry, and Erin all headed in. Nicky stayed in the living room and began her homework.

"Who is that girl?" Henry questioned. He leaned against the counter, glaring at his granddaughter and grandson. Danny had his arm around Erin for support.

"She's my daughter." Erin declared. "I promise I'll explain to everybody when they get here."

"You're telling me you've had another daughter for god knows how long and you never told me! Did your father know?" Her grandfather started, ready to explode on her.

"No! He didn't! No one knew except Mom!" Erin felt her stomach drop. Every time she thought of her mom she felt sad. Her mother told her she would see her daughter again, and she was right. Her mother was always right. She wished she could always be right too, for the sake of both her daughters.

"Erin, this family has never had dirty secrets that other families gossiped about! Now look at us! You got yourself knocked up and tried to get rid of the evidence! Now this is going to make us look awful! All because you couldn't keep your-"

"Pops stop right now! None of this is Erin's fault!" Danny started. Their grandfather looked at him as if he had done something as well. "The only choice Er made was to give her away. And while that might not have been the right thing to do.." Erin turned to glare at him. "I fully respect everything she did."

"Full respect my ass!" Their grandfather retorted. "What you did was unjust and quite frankly you acted like a-"

"What's going on in here?" Frank opened the back door. He looked stressed but his eyes were red and puffy... from crying. Erin gulped. She was hurting her family. Her father was hurt. Her grandfather was upset, her brothers were pretending to be fine, but they were probably mad she had never told them. The bond between her and her siblings was the thing that kept her going... and she could feel a slight drift. Most importantly, she had hurt both of her daughters...

"Erin slept with somebody, that's what!" Her grandfather retorted.

"Pop, I'm sure Erin has a reasonable explanation for what happened and what she did. We are going to calmly eat dinner like we always do, and not fight at the dinner table, or before hand. Understand?" Erin meekly nodded and her grandfather just stomped off into the other room.

Erin looked over at Frank, now sitting at the counter with a cup of coffee that he was spinning between his hands. He saw her looking at him and sighed, pursing his lips like he did when he didn't know what else to do. No matter what he always defended her, even when she had done wrong. That's probably what she loved most about him.

"What's our mom like?" Lizzie asked out of the blue. Nicky had been sitting on the armchair across from her, working on a paper, or at least trying to. She thought her sister was asleep. Apparently not.

"You've met her..." Nicky responded, not sure what to say.

"Yeah, but that was her 'I just got my daughter back after 18 years' act. That's not really her. She's not much of a hugger is she?"

"Nah. She's kind of cold and strict. But she's my- our mom so I love her, you know? And she has her soft moments..."

"This is going to sound really dumb, but I used to dream of getting to hug my mom. It just never felt right with either my adoptive parents. They were great, but they just didn't have..." Lizzie motioned in the and option, not sure of the word.

"You feel more safe with your birth parents. It's scientifically proven." Nicky said, continuing to press keys on her laptop.

"Yeah, but she felt so awkward, like she didn't know what she was doing..." Lizzie reasoned, more to herself then to Nicky, who was scribbling on a piece of paper. She was tempted to mention that her birth father was probably the reason both of her parents were dead, so she would never ever feel safe with her birth father, but decided not to spoil the mood.

"She's not much of an affectionate person. I think it goes with the job. The whole family is kind of cold at times, I don't think they realize they do it. I guess after a long time of seeing dead bodies and evil, they kind of become absorbed into the mood."

Lizzie felt weird. She used to dream about finding her people because no matter how hard she tried she always felt like she was on a different wavelength than her parents. She thought her mom and her would run into each other's arms and Erin would tell her they had been expecting her, but it was nothing like that. And it never would be. Because no matter how hard Erin tried, she couldn't fix what she did eighteen years before that.

"We're here!" Linda screamed from the front door. The door slammed and the sound of running feet hit the floor until two boys were standing in front of Lizzie staring at her. She felt her face get hot, she wasn't a fan of all of the hot attention.

"Who is she?" One of them asked.

"My older sister Lizzie." Nicky answered.

"How come we never get to know these things?" The other whined.

"Boys, run along."

"Dinner is ready!" Her mother screamed from the kitchen. She watched as everyone shot up and shuffled into the dining room. Nicky pulled her over to the table and sat her down before grabbing another chair to sit down next to her. When Linda came around the table Lizzie grabbed her arm and yanked her down in the seat bet to her. The seat was probably originally for Erin, but Lizzie would not sit next to her. She recognized every one at the table except the old guy on the end that seemed to be glaring at her, and the two boys who had pointed her out earlier. She assumed they were Danny and Linda's kids.

Linda shot a look at Danny across the table, they clearly sat together every other week, as did Nicky and Erin. The look on Erin's face was sad, but Lizzie wouldn't back down now.

"I think Lizzie should say grace this week, because she has been reunited with us after eighteen years thanks to God." Frank suggested, although it seemed more like an order. He didn't say that with much emotion, he seemed tenser then he did when she met him the first time.

Lizzie debated whether or not to tell them that she never prayed at dinner, and that her parents only went to church ON Easter and Christmas, but she did remember the prayer her grandmother had taught her. She didn't really know if she believed that there was a god, because why would a god let a girl be taken away from her mother just to be sent back to them eighteen years later? These thoughts would not go away! So what her mother dumped her...! Who cares!

Lizzie gulped.

The whole family held hands, Lizzie holding on to Linda and Nicky. "Bless us, O Lord, and these, Thy gifts, which we are about to receive from Thy bounty. Through Christ, our Lord. Amen." The whole family did the sign, and dinner began. Plates were passed around, Uncle Danny was shoving food up his face, and Lizzie almost felt free of the hot seat.

"So Lizzie, tell the family about yourself." Frank suggested.

"Well, I love singing and musicals, and I originally wanted to become a lawyer, but then I met you guys and realized I don't want to be a cop or a lawyer."

"What's your favorite musical?" Linda asked.

"Phantom of the Opera... it was my parents favorite show. They took me to see it in Chicago. I fell in love with it."

"Danny has never ever taken me to see that. I've been asking for the past 14 years and he won't budge. He says seeing people get murdered in reality wears out the fun of seeing it on stage."

"I would love to go with you! I can get tickets for next week." Lizzie didn't not notice the look on Erin's face when she asked Linda instead of her.

"So what is the plan for Miss Lizzie here?" Linda asked, seeing the look on Erin's face.

"I think I should stay with Aunt Linda and Uncle Danny for a while. Just until they catch the bad guy, you know, since he's a cop. Unlike my parent the lawyer."

"Uh Lizzie, you're staying with me.." Erin growled.

Frank, not wanting a fight to escalate between the mother and daughter already, changed the subject. "What exactly happened eighteen years ago?" Frank said. Erin tensed up immediately, but Frank held out his hand to her. She squeezed it.

"I had just graduated for high school and was at college, when I met this guy, Ian. And he wouldn't leave me alone. I keep trying to get him to stay away from me but he just wouldn't leave. I didn't want to ask dad or Danny for help, so I told mom just so I had someone to talk to. She was furious, went and got me a restraining order, but that didn't fly well with him. He raped me and I got pregnant. He disappeared for a while but Mom didn't want to take any chances so she flew me out to the middle of nowhere for the rest of my pregnancy and when I had Lizzie, she made sure the family she gave her to was qualified. And when he came back for me and her, I told him she died and he started again. But Danny caught him that time. Little did he know it it wasn't the first time." Erin was silently sobbing now, still holding Frank's hand.

"What does rape mean?" One of the boys asked. The group was clearly used to the boys asking questions so they all silenced.

"Rape is when a man hurts a woman... without her permission..." Linda started.

"How does he hurt her?" The boy tried. The adults at the table all furrowed their eyebrows.

"Wait, so why didn't you come get me when he was arrested?" Lizzie asked, changing the subject on purpose. It was making her tense, realizing she was alive because a man had done god knows what to her mother.

"I didn't want to risk him finding you. And I had no idea where you were, my mom obviously knew, she came to visit you, but I never knew... for your safety and protection I never knew. Besides by this point you were already three or four years old, I wasn't going to take you away from your parents."

"You're my parent too you know. And your plan to keep me safe failed. My parents are dead and I'm next on the list." The boys' eyes widened and Linda turned to glare at Danny, who happily continued to eat.

"No you're not. You have the whole Reagan family and the 35,000 men and women on the NYPD that have got your back." Frank said for what seemed like the thousandth time. he really did love his NYPD didn't he?

Lizzie nodded. After going to all of this trouble, she wasn't exactly sure what she had originally wanted to achieve out of this. This family was obviously very close knit and for someone who never belonged, Lizzie didn't think she could find it in her heart to stay. At least now she knew she did have family somewhere, even if they didn't really want her, at least her mother didn't.

She needed to get back to Chicago. Her life was there, not in the city that never sleeps, as much as she loved it there. She needed to bury her parents like they would have wanted, sell the house, and finish high school. She had run off like a little kid. Big deal that someone wanted to murder her or whatever. Maybe she should just finish them off. She did have blue blood, after all.

After that, the conversation went back to polite chit chat about family plans to go see a baseball game, and apparently Lizzie was invited, despite never having been a Jets fan. After dinner, the whole family retreated into the living room, except for Erin, Danny and Frank, who headed into the kitchen. When would she make her move? She needed a gun. There had to be guns around here somewhere, there were three cops in the family. Maybe she could just sneak upstairs...

Lizzie ended up wandering around the house, not really looking for anything in particular. She could at least enjoy looking at the pictures of her family, none of which she was in. Her grandpa stood next to her grandma, who had her hands on Erin's shoulders, who was holding a baby Nicky. Her Uncle Danny had his arms wrapped around a man who she didn't recognize on one side, and Linda on the other. a very young Jamie sat in the middle, his smile wide. Lizzie couldn't help the tears that started coming down her cheek. How could she learned to love a group of people so fast that she had only met today? The way her Uncle Danny look at Aunt Linda and her kids and the way the Commissioner look at all of children... It was a sense of pride and proudness and love that Lizzie admired. She only wished they would look at her the same way. But she was not in the pictures, and she never would be.

"I thought I'd find you up here. I used to come hide up here when I felt sad or mad when I was a kid. That was my room," her mother motioned to one of the rooms on the left. "Being the only girl had its perks. I didn't have to share a room. One time my parents tried to put Danny and I in the same room and we ended up moving a couple months later because we needed more rooms so we wouldn't have to share." She laughed nervously. "I know this has been hard on you. All of it has. I know I'm not the best person to come to, but please talk to me."

"I don't know what to say. This Reagan clan is really close knit. I used to kill for a family like this."

"What was your family like?" Erin asked, motioning to her room. We both walked in and I plopped down on her office chair, while Erin sat on her bed.

"They weren't bad... They just weren't very close knit. My parents would try to get out of going to family dinners because my dad always felt inferior to his brother because he was their mother's favorite. No matter what he did, he was always wrong. My uncle's kids thought they were higher ups as well. I was just never one of the favorites."

"Well, you're one of my favorites." Erin said, forming a smile. "And I know you're upset about not having a picture here, so I came prepared." Erin handed her the envelope that sat in her desk drawer as long as she had had that office, and in her bedside table drawer before that. Lizzie pulled over the flap and pulled out the stack of pictures. She felt the knot in her stomach form and tears lingering in her eyes.

"Your parents sent me pictures. I used to think it made the whole situation worse because it made me regret my decisions." Lizzie flipped through pictures of when she was a kid, through all of her show choir tournaments, until she found a picture of her mother holding a baby in a hospital bed.

"Is that Nicky?" Lizzie asked, not wanting to know the answer.

"No. It's you. My mother took it before she took you away from me. I loved you then, I love you now, and all of the time in between- you do realize that right?"

"Yeah, I guess."

"My favorite was always this one-" Erin took the envelope and fished around until she pulled one out and handed it to me.

Looking at it, I see she picked a picture that was taken when I was five. I can actually remember that day. It was my first dance recital and I was nervous that is would mess up because they gave me the solo. I ended up nailing the solo and the picture was the result, me smiling so widely my teeth might be fallen out.

"Can I keep this?" Lizzie motioned to the picture of her and her mother. Erin nodded. Lizzie picked up her mother's favorite picture and put it up next to the family photo.

"I'm sure Dad and Grandpa will go for getting new pictures done."

"But then he won't be in it." Lizzie said, motioning to Joe. "Will he?"

"He knew about you. He found out when he saw the pictures. He was mad I never told him about you."

"I'm sorry Erin." Erin looked offended that Lizzie didn't call her Mom. She realized that it would take time and trust. Lizzie deserved to be able to get those things on her own schedule, when she did realize that Erin was sorry for everything that happened and would make it up to her.

She would make it up to her, even if it was the last thing she would do.