Ok everyone, this is the end of the dark stuff, after this I think she'll get better :) anyway, it's time for Fawks, John, Ianto and Jack to go home. Although I think some of you know that my lot will be appearing in Rachy Babes' 'Lost' very soon. And on that note, MASSIVE thanks to Rachy Babes for helping out with this chapter too :D
'Sonotalady': Yes maybe one day I'll have a go at stuff like that but for now I'm happy to sticking to the drama and the fluff and stuff. I just gave her two key words, Emotion and violence. Which is the same with this chapter really. I think she just needs another feeling other than the pain of losing Jack and instead of something like cutting or drinking she took a different option. Thanks for the luck, I'm just looking forward to the end now :)
'Rachy Babes': Well, you haven't seen all of this one so enjoy :) Spike doesn't send love he sends a roll of the eyes and a murmur of 'Why does not one understand that I'm bloody EVIL!'… I think that's kind of his equivalent of sending love.
Can we play the game your way?
Can I really lose control?
Mary had a lamb
His eyes black as coals
If we play very quiet, my lamb
Mary never has to know
Just once in my life
I think it'd be nice
Just to lose control, just once
If I cut you down to a thing I can use
I fear there will be nothing good left of you
Evanescence – Lose Control
Winter woke up the next morning with an arm draped over her waist and a tail wrapped around her leg. She expertly removed both and climbed out of the bed, grabbing her clothes in her arms and heading for the showers. She washed the sweat from her body and left the room, refusing point blank to look at herself in the mirror. The wardrobe provided a refuge as she pulled on some black jeans, converses and a black strap-top. On the way out she grabbed a black hoodie and pulled it over her head to hide the marks from last night. She sighed as she let the door click shut behind her and continued down the corridor, she had seen the look in Fawks' eyes last night. John had got it, why couldn't she? Pain was the whole point of last night, she was happy to have been thrown around and scratched, the blood that had leaked from her shoulder was a release of tension that she needed.
Winter jumped as Amy came out of the room to the side and waved.
'Morning.' She sang with a smile. Winter nodded blankly and walked past causing Amy to frown, 'Alright fine.' Rory appeared at her shoulder and watched Winter disappear around the corner.
'She did just lose her fiancé, you know that hurts as well as anyone.' Amy nodded sadly and watched her go as Fawks rounded the corner.
'Have you seen Winter?'
'She just went around the corner.' Rory told her. Fawks nodded and followed in her girlfriend's footsteps. Seconds later John appeared, fully dressed in his army uniform.
'Have you seen…'
'Around the corner.' The couple replied, he nodded in thanks.
TTT
Fawks was good at hide and seek, especially the seeking but this was Winter's turf and the TARDIS was on her side which explained why it took hours for the demon to track her down. She was sat in the console room, Jack, Ianto and the Doctor in an in depth conversation on the wiring method that was allowing them to gain access to their universe. Winter sat next to the Doctor smiling at his wild hand movements. John lent against the side and rolled his eyes as Fawks bounced from foot to foot, working up to what to say. 'Ah! Good morning sunshine!' The Doctor ruined Fawk's element of surprise and leaped off the side. 'Now you're up I can get this trip going.' He disappeared downstairs and Fawks traipsed over to Winter's side.
'Hi.' Winter looked up and blinked.
'Hi.'
'How are you feeling.' For a second she considered lying to the demon but she knew how long that would last and how angry Fawks would be when she heard the truth.
'A bit numb really.' Fawks' face dropped.
'Oh…Oh God Win I'm sorry..' Winter shook her head.
'No…not like that…' she was cut off by a yell from downstairs. Winter glanced down through the glass floor. 'you alright.'
'it's this blasted power cupling, it always malfunctions, no one gets near it without getting a shock. I keep putting off replacing it and now I need it. How is that fair.' Winter's eyes widened in anticipation and she moved towards the stairs leading down to him.
'I'll do it.' Fawks' jaw dropped and she pulled Winter back.
'Was last night not enough pain for the last 24 hours?' Winter shrugged in a non-committal fashion raising Fawks temper. 'Don't shrug your shoulders at me, have you any idea how painful it was for me to do that to you. I bit you so hard you bled. I tasted you blood and that's not enough torture?' Winter shrugged her arm out of Fawks' grip and crossed her arms over her front.
'If you hated it that much maybe you should have thrown me out.'
'I have a feeling you would have enjoyed that even more.'
'Oh that's lovely, thanks for making me out to be some…'
'Don't turn this around on me, it was you that came to my room remember.'
'Yeah because this is all me, fine next time I'll just go to some stranger who'll most likely really hurt me shall I.'
'Why are you being such a child?' Winter smiled in disbelief and frustration and turned to leave. 'Where are you going?' Fawks called, the young woman turned and held her arms out with an imperious look about her.
'What? So you're allowed to storm out like a kid when I call you childish but I'm not allowed the same privilege?' she turned and flounced out of the room as the Doctor peeked over the side and raised his goggles.
'Were you two having a domestic?' he asked smirking. Fawks refrained from answering and Ianto sighed, patting Jack's knee and getting up.
'I guess I'll go after her.' John chose that moment to stride forward.
'Leave this one to me eye candy.' He told them and Fawks caught his arm as he passed. He turned to look at her and she stared up at his face. He slid a finger down her cheek as she begged him.
'Make her better.' She paused, 'I can't do what she's asking me to do. No one here can…I don't want to ask you but…' he placed his finger over her lips and lent down to kiss her. She didn't require and other answer and he left the console room. Jack and Ianto looked out of the room and the Doctor frowned at the conversation. He approached Fawks and spoke slowly and clearly.
'What, was that about?' She ran a hand through her hair and shook her head.
'We can't leave. Not while she's so broken up.' The Doctor shook his head.
'If you hang around you'll just have more of those arguments every day until one of you really does get hurt. She upset Rachel, she lost her fiancé, she doesn't need to feel like she needs to be all loving with you while she's hurting. I'll look after her.'
'You didn't see her last night.' Fawks replied, entranced by the doorway. 'I've never been so…rough with her. And it wasn't enough.' The Doctor ignored the worried looks from Jack and Ianto and wrapped his arms around Fawks.
'I'll look after her.'
TTT
John followed strangle sobbing noise around the corner and turned it to find Winter curled up against the wall. He reached down and pulled her to her feet smoothing the tears from her face. 'don't cry.' He told her, 'That's an order.' She looked up at him in confusion and opened her mouth.
'What do you m..?' He threw her back against the wall forcing her to cry out and held her hands against the wall, coving her lips with his. She understood instantly and stopped trying to speak to him. Waiting for his orders. He stripped off his own jacket
"Clothes off. Against the wall. Now."
Winter hurried to comply with his orders, stripping down and leaning against the wall. Breath already heaving in a weird mix of adrenaline and anticipation and just a touch of fear, John slammed her up against the wall as he crushed his mouth to hers. His hands groping where they pleased and not lightly, pinching and scratching, as his mouth devoured hers, he moved his lips down to her throat tracing the marks made last night, biting down on bruises already made and making them worse. Winter moaned under the pain, at least it was something. John flipped her around so her ribs hit roughly against the wall, briefly winding her but he didn't give her a chance to recover, bringing his knee between her legs to separate them Winter moaned softly at the contact. John leaned forward to whisper harshly in her ear.
"Desperate... Want to be touched do you?" He hissed in her ear, wrapping his hands in Winter's hair and yanking her head back.
"Yes." She moaned.
"I'm going to make you yell until your voice is hoarse." He growled. This gained another moan from Winter as John released her hair and let one hand slide to her chest as he scraped his nails down and earned a gurgled mixed noise from the girl in front of him. And one hand grabbed her hip to steady her as he thrust his hips up to hers. They both let out a low groan from the contact. John slammed her body up flat against the wall and with each powerful buck of his hips the contact would be sure to leave bruises along Winter's hips that were repeatedly slammed into the solid surface.
It was quick, rough and painful. John bit hard into Winter's shoulder, his teeth unlike Fawks' sharp ones not piercing the skin as he reached his limit, his hand twisted painfully in Winter's hair. She hadn't reached her max, and he wasn't going to let her, he pulled back and let her slide down the wall legs too weak to carry her weight and he shut his eyes for a second, burying any emotion he had for the young woman, he could see everything Fawks loved in her, hidden somewhere under her pain. He opened his eyes again and looked down at her, for once her eyes had some sort of feeling, frustration, he smirked at her.
"Thanks." He said cockily before turning his back before he let his emotion show.
TTT
Fawks was rocking in her hammock, her mind miles away from her TARDIS bedroom, the big double bed on the floor left untouched since last night. The door opened and Fawks looked down to John, he looked up at her sadly.
"She-" Fawks began. Jumping down onto the floor.
"Yeah. Go get her."
"John. I can't." Fawks said.
"Listen to me, I know she seems like she's empty right now but she's not that far gone. She doesn't want to do this with some random person she meets on her travels, she wants someone she trusts. She wants you."
"John, if the girl asked me to go out today and sink the entire fleet of Vali warriors I would. No questions asked. She's asking me to hurt her. The only thing I can't do."
"Then she'll go to a stranger. You want that? Some horrible back end dealer's hands on your girl. Some nast piece of work who won't know when to stop? She's not ready to listen to reason yet, show her that this self-destructive war path of hers is not going to help. Like you with these." John said, turning her arm round to see the scars of wounds she'd made on herself. "Let someone else explain, let the Doctor. But explanations aren't what she needs now, she needs help, someone she loves needs to give it her."
Fawks met his eyes.
"When did you get so wise?"
"I've always been wise, you just stop looking after the insanely hot body. Now go, before we land, I left her hanging."
"Stupid move, never mind how sane she is." Fawks laughed giving him a peck on the lips before racing off and heading to where she could smell and mix of John and sex and … blood.
She skidded around the corner and looked at Winter who was pulling her top back on, her movements were stiff, sore. Fawks took a deep breath remembering John's words before walking forwards.
"Where you going?" Fawks asked, Winter turned to look at her.
"My room."
"Wrong answer," Fawks smirked, grabbing the top Winter had just pulled on and pulled the younger woman's already bruised and swollen lips to hers. Fawks let her hands pull Winter to her, her fingertips digging into the soft skin at Winter's waist. She dragged her to the shower stalls, carefully avoiding the wing of showers where she knew her and Jack had been some time ago due to a black stain and an embarrassing tale from The Doctor. She roughly pushed Winter into one of the stalls and flicked on the water, Winter squealed at the cold water as it hit her fully dressed, before it warmed up to a normal temperature. Fawks undressed in the dry and she turned away from Winter for a moment. She clenched one fist tightly until her nails drew blood from her palm even through her gloves, taking a deep breath.
'She needs my help.' She murmured under her breath.
Fawks turned back to Winter in the shower, drawing more blood from her own palm before she walked forward, pinning Winter harshly against the back tiles of the shower as the water rained down on them. With one hand Fawks pinned both of Winter's wrists above her head and trapped them under her forearm, her fingers still stabbing painfully into her own palm as she kissed Winter forcefully, internally wincing at the dull thud of Winter's head on the tile at the force of the kiss.
As Fawks pulled back she nipped Winter's bottom lip with just enough power to form a small cut over the bruising already there.
With her free hand Fawks concentrated until she felt her fingertips tighten into claws and she ran her hand down Winter's body, shredding all her clothes and leaving five long, but not deep scratches across her stomach. Winter's body rippled at the contact and she let out a low mixed sound. Fawks relaxed her hand so it morphed back to her fingers as she teased and taunted Winter, who was already so on edge, before she pressed forwards harshly, bringing a pleasured moan from Winter's lips. Fawks kept her lips latched to the younger girls throat, biting licking scratching nipping, as Winter let out various groans and moans of pleasure. Fawks bit down in places drawing blood every now and then and this seemed to merely increase the younger woman's euphoria.
Winter let out a loud moan as she finally unravelled and Fawks kept close until she caught her breath before backing off and allowing Winter to slide down the wall exhausted. Fawks looked in horror at Winter's bloody arms but then realised it wasn't her blood, it was Fawks'.
"S'cuse me a sec." Fawks mumbled turning her back on Winter and making her way to where towels were kept, she looked up at her reflection and only just contained a snarl, hating what she saw, she pulled back her arm and punched through the glass and wall behind it, not caring as it tore the skin on her wrist back. She grabbed a clean warm fluffy towel and ran back to Winter, who was asleep in the bottom of the stall, she wrapped her up in the towel after shutting off the water and carrying her back to Fawks' room, placing her gently on the bed and then sitting on the floor at the end, she didn't want to look at the marks and bruises she'd made on Winter's skin. Knowing she'd hurt her. Fawks pulled off her glove and saw her palm had four deep puncture marks from where she'd dug in her fingers, she was going to wait. Wait for Jack to come back and make Winter better.
TTT
Winter's dreams were fevered. Her mind seemed to convulse with her body as she wandered the darkened corridors of her consciousness. She tried each door along the way, one by one they opened to reveal stone work behind them and then slammed shut of their own accord. She heard a wailing noise coming from the furthest door and threw it open, the room behind was dark and yet she rushed inside, stumbling against a crib. The door shut and the light switched on and Winter reached down to pull a blanket off the wriggling bundle. 'Kam?' she wondered. The bundle cried out as she whipped the blanket away, but there was nothing underneath. She looked up at the space behind and took two steps back at the sight of Jack, bloody and bruised, holding a child in his arms.
'Yesterday, upon the stair,
I met a man who wasn't there
He wasn't there again today
I wish, I wish he'd go away...'
Winter backed away from Jack's song and tripped up when she hit a long staircase. Jack looked up and began making his way eerily over to her as he continued his rhyme. She turned and raced up the stairs coming to the top and pulling the door there open as she did she caught a glimpse of the hooded figure that had saved her from the silence so long ago.
'When I came home last night at three
The man was waiting there for me
But when I looked around the hall
I couldn't see him there at all!
Go away, go away, don't you come back any more!
Go away, go away, and please don't slam the door...'
The door slammed shut and she turned with a start coming face to face with the bloody Jack who dropped the child into her arms. The second she touched it, it became a skeleton and she screamed.
Winter shot up from the bed and tumbled out into a pair of warm arms. She ignored the fact she had found herself in Fawks' room and the fact that she was still lacking in clothing and gripped the shirt of the man opposite her. The Doctor glanced over at Fawks and John who had run to fetch him when her twisting and turning in the bed had become more violent and they hadn't been able to wake her up. He ran his hands gently down her bare back and made soothing noises.
'It's alright, it's me, nothing's going to happen. You're fine.' Her breathing calmed relatively quickly and she reached out, pulling the sheets back around her body.
'I'm sorry.' He shook his head.
'You don't have…' She protested and glanced over at the couple at the side, unable to meet their eyes.
'I'm sorry for putting you through all this. I don't know what came over me but…I feel better now and, I think we should take you home because I… I think I just…need some time.' The Doctor gripped her hand and she felt arms encircle her waist.
'I'm not going anywhere until…' Fawks began, but John interrupted her.
'As soon as the power coupling is fixed we'll be on our way.' Fawks opened her mouth to protest but he shook his head. Winter smiled gratefully and nodded and Fawks set her jaw slightly, angry at being left out of the decision. The Doctor and Jack got up and left Fawks and Winter on the bed, they stared off into space, refusing to look each other in the eye and trying to come up with something to say.
'It's strange.' Winter began, Fawks looked up at her, wrapped up in the blankets and let her continue. 'Whenever we're together we always seem to have some massive row. First in you universe with the whole dying thing, then in mine with my cover being blown, now here with the wedding and everything.' She paused and chanced a glance at her girlfriend. 'Do you ever think that we could just have a nice time like we used to? Before, when we first met, couldn't we just have a time together where we're happy. Because I love you, so much that it hurts but I seem to spend half our time together shouting at you and,' tear began to well up in her eyes and she fiddled with the bracelet on her wrist, 'I don't want to fight with you. I love you.' Fawks took her hand gently, 'I love you,' Winter repeated, 'I'm so, so sorry.' the demon's resolve broke and she carefully pulled the young woman into her arms kissing her softly and laying down on the bed at her side.
'I love you too.' Was all she could muster, unwilling to speak unless her carefully constructed show of feeling broke and her emotions shattered.
TTT
'Are you sure you don't want to come with us?' Ianto asked as Winter and he sat on the Captain's seat. 'We could always do with the extra man…well, girl-power.' She smiled and shook her head.
'I think I've done enough. I'm better off here for now. The Doctor can look after me, not that I need looking after.' She back peddled, he laughed and leant over to hug her.
'Well I'll see you soon then.'
'Soon?' she frowned and he smiled secretively before walking out of the TARDIS. Jack gave her a quick hug and looked down at her as though contemplating something.
'You'll get through this, he'll be back, I can't say I really know him, but I know me, and if it were Ianto…' he smiled and kissed her forehead, 'He'll be back.' She nodded and watched him go. Arms encased her, trapping her hands at her sides and a familiar voice whispered.
'I guess this is goodbye, doll face.' She smiled and turned around. 'I don't know how you do it but you seem to have every time agent in two different universes under some kind of seduction spell and adding my girlfriend and eye candy to that and you're doing quite well for yourself. Ever thought of organising…'
'John do you mind not filling her mind with filth.' Fawks called over from where she was hugging the Doctor.
'Oh I think her mind is already pretty full of filth if the last few days are anything to go by.' Fawks' eyes grew wide and she sent a worried glance toward Winter but to her surprise the young woman laughed it off. For a second the demon was hit by a happy realisation that Winter and John really did get on quite well. John let go and waved as he stepped out of the blue box. Fawks took Winter's hand in hers and stepped closer to the young woman, nuzzling their nose together and kissing the corner of her mouth. Winter sighed and closed her eyes, converting every touch to a memory she could keep forever.
'I'll see you soon.' Fawks told her, 'You need me, for anything, a chat, a rescue, a booze up in some sleezy bar, you rub that damn ring and let me know because if you don't I'll set Freddie on you.' Winter giggled and Fawks grinned upon seeing her smile. 'I love you.' She told her. Winter reached up and pushed the mask off Fawks eyes and onto her forehead.
'I love you.' She replied and leant in to kiss her. Fawks eventually pulled back and slid the mask back onto her eyes heading for the door.
As soon as they were all gone the Doctor reset the co-ordinates and came to stand at Winter's side. He didn't say anything, just took her hand in his and squeezed it gently. Rory and Amy who had been leaning against the side noticed the moment and Rory pulled his wife to the door.
'Lunch anyone?' he asked. Amy nodded and turned to the other two. The Doctor nodded to her.
'We'll be there in a minute.' They left the room and he looked down at Winter and gave her a thoughtful look.
'What?' she asked.
'What sort of music do you like?' he replied.
Review? Please? :)