Hello, my lovelies! It's been awhile since I've updated (honestly I don't know if anyone's been getting notifications for this story, please leave a review if you have because I'm kinda worried), and that's because the day after I posted the last chapter, my internet was shut off. Like, for reals. I finally have it back (sadly with a different provider, bleh) and decided to celebrate by posting this chapter a day early. I've written two chapters (and a bit more) on my phone and my fingers hurt because the keyboard on my phone is so tiny, but I hated not being productive. Hopefully you lovelies enjoy the chapter (and seriously, please tell me if you have or haven't been getting notifications about this story) and I hope all of you have a very lovely day or night! ~Shaymie

Alex's POV

"You shouldn't be spending the first day of spring break in a hospital room, Al." Lo frowned when I walked into the room, scratching at the medical tape holding her IV in. I put a hand over hers as I sat down and kissed her cheek. She had picked up on some of her nervous habits again, like scratching herself or chewing on her hair. I could tell she was going stir-crazy in this room, but hopefully that would change soon. She was getting checked out when George and Martha came back from taking Laf on tours of colleges around the city. He didn't want to go too far away from home.

"It's fine, love. I know you must be getting sick of this room by now, so I thought I would keep you company." Lo smiled and adjusted herself slightly. She wasn't completely back to full health yet, but at the very least she was able to walk. The doctors wanted to keep her under observation until she recovered completely, but she refused to spend another week in this hospital room. George had to pull some strings in order to be allowed to check her out. I hoped the paparazzi wouldn't find out about this somehow and hound her when it came time to leave. This was the last thing we needed.

"When I get out of here, I think I'll try to do something new," Lo murmured, grabbing her phone. A light blush spread across her cheeks as she started typing something into it. "I've been talking with my therapist, and he agrees that I've been getting… better. When it comes to talking to people, I mean. I'd like to audition for a play or a musical. Something that'll get me out in front of a crowd."

"Lo..." I frowned, not knowing what to say. I had no doubt that she'd be amazing in any role she auditioned for-then again, maybe I was a bit biased. But I wasn't sure if going out on stage, in front of hundreds of people, was such a good idea. I looked into her eyes, which were so bright and beautiful and excited to see what I'd say, and I knew that I couldn't crush her dreams. She knew her limits, right? If she thought she was ready for this, then who was I to tear her down? I smiled and kissed her gently. "What roles were you thinking of auditioning for?"

Her eyes lit up even more (which I didn't even think was possible) as she scrolled through her phone, rambling off a list of characters and how she felt she'd be perfect for them. I'll be honest, I didn't know any of the characters or musicals she listed. I wasn't a big theater person. But I smiled and nodded along anyway. It felt like it had been ages since I'd seen my girlfriend this happy. She was smiling so wide, I thought her face would split apart.

"You probably think it's crazy of me to want to do this." Lo's smile faded a bit as she looked at me, but her eyes were still shining. "I've always admired those people on Broadway who could get out in front of hundreds of people and perform. And everyone's always telling me that I have a good singing voice. So I figured I should make the most of it. You only live once, after all."

"I'll support you in everything you do, love."

"I'll probably need some better vocal training," Lo murmured, squeezing my hand. Her thumb gently rubbed the back of my hand as she rambled excitedly. "Not that Ms. Morris isn't a good teacher or anything, but I'll need something a little bit more. Maybe she'll offer some extra classes outside of school. Do you think I could pull an 'I just got shot, so please give me vocal lessons so I don't sound like a dying whale when I belt out notes' card? I don't want to end up like post-Wicked Idina Menzel. Then again, my main issue is with my breathing. I should probably focus on making my breaths be not so obvious before I worry about belting-"

"Love, calm down," I laughed, seeing the excited expression on her face. She was like a kid in a candy store. She huffed at me and crossed her arms, her eyes narrowing. I brushed some hair behind her ear, my gaze falling down to her wrists, and remembered part of the reason I wanted to visit her today. I reached into my pocket and pulled out her charm bracelet. The doctors had taken it from her when she went into surgery, and it wasn't until today that I remembered to bring it. I traced a thumb lightly over the charms before grabbing her wrist and clasping the bracelet on. Her eyes darkened as she looked down at her scars.

"What's wrong, Lo?"

"I hate them." She scowled as she ran her index finger over the scars. "I remember how I got them. Every single one. James and Maria gave me a lot. I hate that they still have some control over me. Whenever I mess up anything, I have this… overwhelming urge to hurt myself. And even though I know that James is going to be locked up for a long time and Maria's… I don't know where she is. I know that they won't hurt me anymore, but I'm still scared."

"...You should press charges, Lo. Reynolds and Maria raped you. They've sent you threatening texts-which I know you still have in your phone because you never delete texts- and they've hurt you both mentally and physically. Hell, Reynolds fucking shot you! You can't just let them get away with this! We have enough evidence to build a case against them. The texts, your scars… Everyone's testimonies. They saw how Reynolds treated you. Lo, I know this is scary, but-"

"I can't do it. I can't stand in court and testify against them."

"Lo, they're the reason you have PTSD! You still flinch if I raise my voice or make any sudden movements. And you're in therapy because of them!"

"I'm in therapy for a lot of things, Alex. Like the fact that I still have nightmares about my father molesting me, and I'm still terrified that my mother will leave me again and I have this underlying fear that everyone I love will leave me because I'm nothing but a useless piece of shit."

"Lorin, you're not useless. I mean, you saved my fucking life," I whispered, grabbing her hands. Her eyes filled with tears as she looked away from me, her mouth trembling. Did she not believe me? Was her self-worth so low that she completely hated herself? "Lo, I don't know what they told you, but whatever it was isn't true. You're the sweetest girl I know. You're kind and patient and far more forgiving than I'll ever be."

"I'll never forgive them. They don't deserve my forgiveness. What they did to me… there's no making that up. They ruined my life and laughed while they did it. I never thought I would say this about anyone, but I hate them. Even so, I… I can't bring myself to testify against them. I don't want to see them again, Alex. Please don't make me do this."

"It's your decision, love. But I don't think George is going to give this up without a fight." Ever since he had found out about what Reynolds and Maria had done back in September, he had been trying to build a case against them. Lo kept begging him to just let it go, but this had been the last straw. He wasn't just going to back down. He was probably going to get the best lawyers in the city. Lo's face fell, and she looked away from me, playing with the ends of her hair.

"I just want to leave this all behind."