April's mind was buzzing with worries as she drove to the lair. She was rather grateful that Casey had taken his motorcycle rather than riding in her van, because she doubted she would be very good company — she was too wrapped up in thinking about Don to make conversation. Too busy worrying that his trauma was dragging him down.
Before long, the motorcycle and van parked in the garage — a massive room with the Battle Shell, the Turtle Tunneler and Shell Cycle all sitting in it. Casey hopped off his ride as April opened her door, but she paused as she sensed something strange about the Turtles' home. It took a moment for her to realize what it was — it was quiet.
It was hardly ever quiet in the Turtles' lair. After all, four seventeen-year-old males lived there, which meant that it was usually rowdy and noisy — like a fraternity occupied exclusively by mutant turtles. The TVs blared, Donnie's inventions hummed and whirred, Raph grunted and roared his way through his workouts, weapons clashed as they practiced, and the sound of laughter and teasing rang out as they played. Even at night, there was the sound of Raph snoring and Mikey mumbling in his sleep.
But it was eerily quiet now, almost as if the Turtles were out of the lair. For a moment, April thought they might have left, giving Splinter the run of the place. But then she saw that the TVs, though muted, were all tuned to a cheesy sci-fi movie — meaning Mikey was still there.
He was sitting in front of them, a comic-book open in his lap, but not looking at it. Klunk was crawling around his feet, meowing and attempting to get his owner's attention, but Mikey's eyes were fixed on a point a thousand miles away.
And as April came closer, she saw that Leo was also present. He was sitting beside the river-water pool in the center of the lair, his legs crossed and his eyes closed. Lost in meditation. She glanced around again, checking for Raph, but he seemed to be absent.
"Leo? Mikey?" Casey called out.
Mikey almost jumped off the couch. "Casey!" he protested. "You almost made me jump outta my shell!" He leaped lightly over the back of the couch, leaving a disgruntled Klunk to meow loudly at him.
"Where's Raph?" Casey asked.
"Sulking upstairs," Mikey said. Then his face grew more serious. "He's — he's upset right now."
Raph being upset — and angry — about something wasn't a particularly rare occurrence, and normally April wouldn't have been too concerned about it. But something about Mikey's expression and tone told her that Raphael was upset about something important.
Leo had broken out of his meditation and was rising to meet them, a troubled look marring his face. April turned towards him, and said, "I came to see how Don was doing."
The two Turtles looked at each other, their faces growing grim. "Don — isn't doing so well," Leo said slowly.
April's eyes widened and her heart bounced into her throat. She had hoped that leaving his room meant he had improved — but something must have happened if they were reacting this way to her question.
"See, Leo managed to get him out of his room today, and I got him to eat something," Mikey said. "So I thought he was doing better, you know? He still seemed kinda funny, but he was doing normal stuff. He even did some training with us and Master Splinter. He was actually doing a pretty good job when — he just sort of freaked out and went back to his room."
"It was my fault," Leo said in a low voice. "I tried to help him get up, but I didn't realize he would react that way."
"What way?" April asked.
Leo lowered his head. "I accidentally reminded him of the — of what happened to him," he said quietly.
"Gettin' beat up?" Casey said, confused.
April looked at Leo, who silently shook his head. None of them had told Casey yet — and they wouldn't unless Donatello wanted them to. April felt guilty for letting Casey remain in the dark — after all, he was part of the Turtles' team too — but she knew she would feel even guiltier if she told him about something so personal without Don's permission. Especially since he was in so much pain right now…
"Something like that," Leo said, crossing his arms. "He started panicking and left. I — I tried to go in a little while ago to check on his injuries, to make sure nothing's become infected. but he said that he wanted to be left alone." His brow furrowed, and April had the feeling that that was the cause of Leo's impromptu meditation.
She glanced between Mikey and Leo's faces, seeing the same anxiety blooming in both of their eyes. Don was the mellowest of the four brothers, the least likely to cause trouble on his own — and so having him so wounded was going to mess with their heads.
"Can I talk to you privately, April?" Leo said quietly.
April followed him across the small bridge that spanned the river-water pool, glancing back to make sure Casey and Mikey weren't following them. Leo's face was grim as he turned towards her, and cast a quick glance up at the doorways above them.
"April, I — I was wondering if you could try to talk to Don," he said quietly. "He still hasn't said a word about what happened to him, even though we all know. It's like he's bottling it all up inside, and trying to act like nothing happened even though he's falling apart because of it. And he's so — withdrawn. We've tried to ease him back into normal activities like training, but even when he's trying hard to participate, he seems so… distant." His eyes drifted back to Don's doorway. "It's like he's gone to a place that we can't follow, and we don't know how to get him back. We've never been like this before — one of us cut off from the others."
He looked back at her, anguish swimming in his eyes. "I — I don't know what to do, April," he said. "I don't know how to help him. You were there — you know what happened better than anyone. Maybe he'll talk to you."
April nodded. "I'll do my best, Leo."
He smiled weakly. "I know you will, April."
April reached out and squeezed his shoulder companionably. She had never seen Leo so anguished about one of his brothers before, but then again, they had never experienced something like this before. The closest that April could remember was when Leo himself had been savagely beaten by the Foot Clan and had nearly died. In the weeks of his recovery, Leo had become withdrawn and miserable — and it was only with a little help from Raph that he had returned to normal.
April felt a flutter of apprehension as she made her way towards Don's bedroom. Don and his brothers were closer than any siblings she had ever met in her life — though they sometimes irritated one another, they had a bond that was unbreakable and unshakeable. Don was particularly close to Raph, in an odd way — he was the yin to Raph's yang, the calm and intellectual counterbalance to Raph's anger and passion. What was more, Don had once confidently told her that Raph always protected him in battle, watching his back as they fought.
They all belonged together — they compensated for each other's weaknesses, shored up one another's strengths. Taking any one of them out of the equation destabilized the other three — and perhaps they needed Don's serenity and level-headedness most of all.
As she stepped onto the second level, she could see that Raph was leaning against the wall outside Don's room, his arms tightly crossed across his chest. His head was bowed, but April could see misery etched on his features.
"Are you okay, Raph?" she asked.
He looked up slightly. "He ran away from us," he said hoarsely. "Like we was tryin' to hurt him."
April put a hand on his shoulder. "Raph — he didn't mean it like that," she said quietly.
"I know," Raph muttered. But his expression didn't change.
"He's just hurting at the moment. If you give him a little time, I'm sure he'll—"
Raph shook his head, and leaped off the walkway, down into the living space. Other voices began to murmur below — April heard Casey and Raph's most prominently.
She turned back towards Don's doorway and squared her shoulders. Except for the light falling from outside, the room was completely dark — she could see the bulky shapes of furniture looming against the stone walls, but nothing more about them. And though she knew Don was inside, she couldn't see any sign of movement. Maybe he was asleep.
"Don," she said quietly. "Can I come in?"
There was only silence for a moment, and then a quiet voice said, "Yes."