A/N: This is based off of the twelfth drabble in the story "Twenty Kisses" by SpeechBubble; just because I love this pairing and Twenty Kisses is seriously an amazing story. As well as Unofficial Files, also by SpeechBubble. Seriously. If you haven't already read them, that's the very next thing you should read after this.

I know this probably kind of sucks, but I couldn't help myself. So please, if you will, try to find some form of enjoyment in this, the worst Alex Rider drabble/short oneshot I have ever written.

Ne Vous Excusez Pas

Alex knew that Ben had returned the second he stepped foot in the house; it was the soft creak of the front door and Alex's acute sense of teenage-super-spy hearing that gave him away. If Ben was trying to be quiet, Alex mused as he sat up and kicked the blankets off of himself, he was doing a rather lousy job of it.

And it was the creak of the second to last step on the staircase that once again gave Ben away; he'd been coming up to see Alex. He hadn't even climbed five steps before a figure threw itself out of the darkness, wrapping it's arms around his neck. Stumbling back in surprise, he blinked.

"Al," he breathed in realization, wrapping his arms around the younger man's torso. "Hey." Vaguely, Ben could feel a sense of guilt bubbling up in him again. Here the boy was, clinging to him as though he'd missed him horribly (which he had). And without any idea what Ben had been forced to do while he was away. They had an agreement. It wasn't cheating if it was for a mission. That didn't stop Ben from feeling like he'd done something terrible and wrong.

"You were supposed to be back four hours ago," Alex reminded him, the words turning slightly muffled as he buried his face in the crook of Ben's neck. "Not that adding four hours to three weeks makes much of a difference. I missed you." Ben swallowed. He didn't mean to say what he did next; he meant to say something else that was on his mind. 'I love you.' 'I missed you, too.'

"I'm so sorry," was what came out, sounding sad and slightly choked. Alex pulled back and gave him a small, crooked smile, waving the apology off.

"Like I said, four hours doesn't make much of a difference."

"No, Alex," Ben murmured. "I...the mission...I'm sorry." The smile began to fade from Alex's face as he stood, looking on in confusion. "I had to...do something...I really didn't want to do...and I'm sorry."

Alex blinked. Slowly, a look of realization dawned on his face, surprising Ben. "Oh," Alex said quietly. "Oh." The confusion returned to his face. "You don't have to apologize," he reminded him. "We agreed..."

"It's not cheating if it's for a mission. I know." Alex moved forward again, resting his head against the older man's chest. "It just...it felt wrong was all. Like I was hurting you or something."

"If you say 'I'm sorry' one more time, I'll roundhouse kick you," Alex said into his shirt. Ben chuckled. "Come on." Alex pulled away again. "I'm exhausted and you look like crap, so I'm going to assume you are, too."

As Alex pulled on his hand, leading him upstairs, Ben felt at least some of the guilt begin to fade.

There was a lot of difference between sleeping beside that woman and sleeping next to Alex. She'd been too soft; too gentle. The way Alex automatically reached for Ben's hand in his sleep, the way he insisted on using the other's shoulder as his pillow, put a comfortably familiar feeling in his stomach; the only thing that, for a few hours at least, allowed him to convince himself that he'd done no wrong.

A/N: Like it, hate it...wanna rate it? Reviews are appreciated!