CIA?
Greg managed to sleep through the night and beyond the morning shift change. He briefly remembered having someone ease a thermometer in his mouth and checking his vitals at some point, but he hadn't even opened his eyes at the time. The nursing assistant had been gentle and quiet.
Food service, on the other hand, dropped his breakfast tray on the table in front of him, startling him to wakefulness. On a normal day, that knee jerk response would have cost him. This wasn't a normal day. If it weren't for the fact he was hospitalized, he would have said it was a good day.
Well…almost. There was definitely a need to perform at least one bodily function. Damn. Reluctantly he pressed the call button.
"I'll be right in," a disembodied voice echoed out of the walls.
In a matter of seconds a nurse came in. "What do you need?"
"Gotta potty."
"You have a catheter in. It only feels like you have to urinate."
"Huh."
"It's probably the sedation." She made notes in his chart then took the cover off his breakfast tray.
"I'm not hungry," he said feebly.
"Non-negotiable. You have to at least suck down the liquids. Doctor's orders."
"What on there that's liquid."
"Decaf coffee, milk and juice."
"What's on there that's solid?"
"Oatmeal."
"Dump the milk in the coffee and the juice in the oatmeal."
"I thought you weren't hungry," the nurse teased.
"None of this stuff is ingestible as a stand-alone. If I didn't think it would look and taste like vomit, I'd tell you to dump it all in one bowl."
She only did half of what he asked. "I'm going to raise you up to a sitting position." It was much easier for her to get the tray close. "What do you want to start with?"
"There's not much of a choice."
"Glop it is." The nurse loaded up a spoon and put it in his hand.
Greg appreciated her allowing him to at least try to feed himself. He was shaky but he made it to his mouth. He was a little concerned that the simple task exhausted him and wondered if muscle relaxants were the whole cause. He made a mental note to ask his doctor.
"Thought you weren't hungry," the nurse moved his tray away.
"It wasn't as bad as I expected." House stifled a yawn. "When's the doctor due in?"
"He's on grand rounds now."
"Do I have time to call my boss and tell her I won't be into work?"
"Someone's already done that for you." The nurse flipped through his chart. "Seems Dr. Darryl Nolan sent a fax this morning."
"Huh." Greg was surprised Cuddy and crew hadn't tried to have him transferred to Princeton-Plainsboro. Maybe the paperwork was being processed.
"I know I'm not supposed to ask, but do you work for the government?"
House smirked. "What makes you think that?"
"You're employer's name and address has been blacked out."
"Well, if I told you, I'd have to kill you."
"And your condition is completely glossed over as," she used air quotes, "a change in pain management."
Greg made a mental note to thank Nolan first chance he got. "That's not a lie."
"It's just weird."
'At least I don't have to make any phone calls,' Greg thought. "I like weird."