CHAPTER 27 – THE BEGINNING OR THE END?
That same eerie feeling came over him when they arrived back at the waterfalls. One time superimposed upon many others. If he squinted hard enough, he felt that he could see the ghosts of all the ancestors standing around the edges of the falls, just watching, waiting, to see if he would make the right decisions. Temptation was there. To simply stand and give them the proverbial finger and tell them to sod off. This was his life and he was through with the manipulation and control and the feeling of being on a damn runaway train.
Gina felt it too, even without the blood running through her veins. She sensed the centuries of discord, of reasoning of humans making sense of situations over which they had no control. She tugged on his hand and looking down at her he saw the unease on her face and simply pulled her closer. No words, just touch. And if he shut his eyes he could simply pretend that it was the two of them against the world, against the universe. Together.
He reached into his pocket and brought out the device. It was small, fit comfortably into the palm of his hand. It needed to be initialized by the Ancient Technology Activation gene in order to be used. Once active, it need only be placed anywhere on the body to engage the forcefield. While active, the forcefield would diffuse all forms of energy, including energy weapons and kinetic energy from bullets. It also possessed a built-in "Inertial dampener" which would protect the wearer if they fell from a great height. It had an internal power cell which would eventually deplete under strain, and was not rechargeable once it had been depleted. The shield responded to mental commands, and would generally require discipline to use correctly and could only be deactivated by mental command. Without proper mental focus, the user's subconscious desires may override their conscious desires, resulting in unwanted behavior from the device.
Knowing all this about the device, John hoped that Callandra would allow the poor astronaut some sort of enhanced training in how to work the damn device or he'd still be in the water without a paddle – personal shield or otherwise. He knew from personal experience with their experimentation of them in Atlantis, that they did sometimes have a not so welcome effect. Still, not his problem. Hers. Callandra would deal with that one. He simply had to get the device to the astronaut.
In one smooth throw he sent it flying into the centre of the deep pool, surrounded by lush foliage, the singing of tropical birds and the rushing sound of the falls that fell through the rocks that shifted and became hazy if one gazed at them too long. One such as himself, anyway. There. It sank into the depths, inactive now, waiting for it's intended wearer to claim it. To begin it's journey underground, picked up by an understream current, taken through a underground tunnel of freezing water that appeared to flow straight down to hell itself, then out into the ocean, to drift, caught on the tides - following a course as preset by the moon, the configuration of the stars and the chess game that was now in play. Mission complete. Almost.
He took her hand as she leaned into him, and took a deep breath. "Done. What now? Life goes on. For me. For you. For the rest of the damn universe. All because of this action. It's almost humbling really..."
"Gina?" They both turned when they heard the voice and saw General Mitchell and another man standing some distance away, discreetly as if unsure whether to intrude.
"Dad. Frank? You never come here Frank... say it feels strange...what's brought you here today?"
"You Gina..." his breath hitched and he moved forward and John watched him keenly and knew immediately that it was Gina's brother. And Lieutenant Cameron Mitchell's father. One day, very soon. The resemblance was startling. Having spent some time in the officer's company in their early air force days, they had become friends and Cam had joined SG1 at around the same time as John had joined the Atlantis programme, taking over as commander of SG1 after Jack O'Neill became a general and was promoted to a non field role within the SGC. So this was the other connection, the one he knew was still to come. Had felt it when he looked at General Mitchell and remembered Callandra's comment that the general's role had not been fulfilled yet. And suddenly certain things about his old friend Cam fell into place. Oh yeah. Paradoxes and ripples. He'd better be damn careful not to cause any right now.
"Dad told me... aah hell sis. I don't know what to say. God, I don't know what to think..." His gaze swung to John now and there was an assessing quality there, as John found himself weighed up, checked, sized and finally given a grudging stamp of approval. All in space of a single glance. Oh yeah - this was Cam's old man, no doubt about it. And Cam's grandfather... and aunt? Crap! Is there anyone on this damn island who does not have connections back in my time. What the hell is going on?
Then he began laughing and unable to stop himself, even when he saw the anger begin to build in Frank's eyes at what he considered disrespect for his feelings. "I'm sorry. Really. I mean no disrespect. Really. Cam told me that he and Sam had a distant family connection. Of course. Cam's dad and Sam's dad - cousins. I feel a little as though I have been caught in an incestuous web of tangled connections, and if I appear slightly mentally deficient or exhibit signs of lunacy, then this is because this has been the day to end all days and I am so sorry you have to deal with all this on top of the crap you have just learned."
His laughter abruptly ceased and he let his features slip and now he looked at Frank with sadness. "I don't know how much you've been told Frank, and hell - you've got every right to rail at the universe for what you've been found out."
"John. Not now. Please." Gina had moved toward her brother and was looking up at him. He did not need to hear John's rantings now. She needed let him express his feelings in his own way.
"Talk to me Frank. Let's go away from the others for a little bit. Just you and I."
They left them, she holding his hand tightly and John felt sickened by the pain he saw on her brother's face. Everytime he thought they had finished connecting the dots, another piece of the puzzle became unstuck and needed to be refit. How much more? He felt that strange compulsion to start laughing again. But quickly squashed it down. It was not disrespect and he didn't want it to appear like that. It was simply that suddenly the key players or most of them anyway, for the entire stargate programme, were suddenly at his fingertips, and all found without one family unit - more of less. The implications were staggering and again he wondered at the manipulations that had occurred along the way to get everyone to this point in their lives.
"John..." He heard Callandra's voice and froze. Not sure if he wanted to talk to her now, but something had been playing around in his mind, something that had come to him as he watched Gina and Frank walk away together."
He turned abruptly and looked at her. She stood beside General Mitchell, both tall and imposing people, both carrying the ancient gene. One an ascended being. The other.. one day. "Tell me something Callandra. If Gina doesn't die in that accident... how does that not create ripples. If she doesn't die, then O'Neill's father doesn't die trying to save her, a hit and run drivers life isn't ruined... and so on..."
"Not so simple John. Think of it as a carefully woven fabric. If one thing is changed, then if you carefully replace the missing fabric the pattern can still be clear, if one understands how the process works. That is the only thing I can change. I have done the calculations and as you can imagine, it is as complex as a calculus equation. The accident will still take place..."
"You've chosen another to die in her place? How is that fair?"
"No John. Not die. Jack O'Neill senior will still die, but he will save the girl that will be in that same spot that Gina would have been. Her life will not change in any way as she was already in the accident also, and was the survivor. The only survivor other than the driver."
"So you only took out one small part of the equation and the answer still remains the same."
"The overall answer. But yes, for all intents and purposes, the answer is the same."
"Except for Gina."
"Yes John. Except for Gina. Nothing else changes. It has been carefully calculated."
He sensed then that Gina had returned with her brother. General Mitchell had not contributed to the conversation and John had the sense that he had already spent a good part of his morning talking things through with Frank and had little left in him to say.
"Time for you to go John..." He looked around sharply at Callandra's voice.
"John?" He heard panic in Gina's voice and knew that she was not ready for him to , he was not ready to leave.
"If you don't go now John, there will be consequences. You know that."
"Gina - come with me." Panic filled his voice now. Suddenly it was not so clear cut. He couldn't leave her here. He wouldn't leave her here. Simple.
"She can't leave yet John. She cannot leave for three more months. When that time comes, you will come back for her."
He felt her cling to him then, and knew that separation would be a physical pain. Wildly he cast his eyes around this small intimate clearing, surrounded by her family, the brilliant green foliage and the sound of the falls as they fell to the limitless depths of the small pool. And looked at the falls, innocous, innocent but the door to another time. His time. Without her.
"Gina..." He reached out a hand and found it unsteady and not wanting to appear weak in front of her family he hardened his resolve. He did not want her to see his insecurities either. She would have enough to deal with when he left. His strength would at least be his gift to her. "Come here love, it's only three months. You need that time with your family. They need that time to say goodbye. Those are the only loose threads you will allowed to tie up. You know that don't you. Nothing else must change. Please Gina, stick to the rules and in three months I'll come back and get you."
She clung to him them and felt her shuddering breaths and when he turned her face up her eyes were bleak. She found a smile for him. "Thank you. For the past few days. For the one night. Thank you." And those simple words were the undoing of him and he held her tight and her father, her brother - turned away slightly to allow them their privacy. Oblivious to them he dropped his mouth onto hers, hard and fierce and tasted the salt of her tears and the taste that was her. The kiss stirred memories and more than just a small amount of need and he didn't fight it, let it ride to the surface and if there had been no witnesses to their goodbye, he would have had her on the ground and there would be nothing between them, just hot skin and passion... his hand crept to her breasts and he touched her , none to gently to hear her moan and then whispered to her. "One night... October 15th... you're mine..." He pulled himself away and flicking a salute at the two men, both of whom stood to attention and returned the respect and slanted a quick glance to Callandra he stepped
behind the waterfall. Purple light, pulsing and bright and he was gone. Colonel John Sheppard had left 1962. And it was with a cry that Gina collapsed onto the ground and lay there unmoving, while her father and brother hovered uncertainly around her. Only Callandra stood there with a knowing look.