Chapter 3

"Like a fucking power high!"

Beer spilled over Negan's hand as he clashed it in the table and the surrounding men yelled with joy and raised their glasses as Negan continued his speech. I was cleaning up a table along with another girl, Dwight's girlfriend. She looked to me as Negan yelled and slammed Lucille down on the table, the barbed wire ringing through the entire room. I smiled to myself and threw the trash away and she looked away from the commotion, trying to get as far away from them as possible.

"We took them out and we'll take out any other stupid fucking group that comes along trying to take us out." Negan was vicious looking out over his men but then his eyes landed on me, "And we take out anyone who hurts our fucking people."

I looked away and continued cleaning while the men cheered. I could feel him still staring at me as I bent down and began folding the extra chairs away, the men were going to get wasted and break all our shit again I just knew it. I walked to the storage room and began shoving the chair in while Dwight's girl finished up on the factory floor.

"Lights out, baby."

I gasped in surprise as Negan attacked me from behind, slamming the storage door close and pushing me against the far wall, cornering me in as he clicked off the light. I slammed my hands on his chest, eyes adjusting to the darkness as Negan breathed coolly in front of me. I could hear the shit eating grin spreading across his face.

"Negan."

"Don't be like that, baby girl. I know you were watchin' me all night." he cooed in my ear, leather jacket catching on my shirt and he began to trace the exposed skin on my hip, "Like the way I look?"

"You look the same." I replied, making out his face in the darkness, I unzipped his jacket and pushed it off of his shoulders. There was a knock on the door as he began to kiss my neck. He slammed a fist against the wall and kicked the door.

"Fuck off!" He boomed.

The person on the other side ran off but only to yell to the men in the hall that Negan was trapped in the closet again. Wolf whistles followed for a moment as Negan gripped my hips with his hands but they slowly died out. Negan laughed darkly as he dropped his jacket to the floor and easily slid my long sleeve off to join his there.

"Its disgusting in here." I breathed as Negan kissed me again, teeth scraping against my neck as I pushed his shirt up to grab at him.

"It's disgusting everywhere, we can make it worse though with that fucking mouth." He picked me up, slamming me against the wall again and I wrapped my legs around his waist as he fumbled with his belt and his buckle, he pushed up the skirt I had been wearing, "This skirt supposed to be this short?"

"It's not even that short."

"Short enough for me to rip it the fuck away." he growled in my ear as I slid down the wall closer to him, "Shouldn't fucking wear it around here anymore."

"Yeah, okay Negan." I breathed as he pressed closer to me and I closed my eyes.

"I love you."

It was whispered into the air as I watched Negan circle some people from the Hilltop as they came in from their community, hauling a small cow who was busy looking left and right and sniffing the ground. I was sitting on one of the tailgate of the trucks, enjoying being out in the sunlight and Negan had been sitting besides me for a while, ignoring the women that kept glancing our way, confused. I could feel it in my bones, a year after coming into the Saviors group that I was meant to be here, meant to be under Negan's command and what he had going on here.

He turned towards one of the taller men, whose hair was long and face calm as he handed over the cattle to Steven who immediately led it away. Negan smiled and clapped him on the back, handing water bottles to the men and sending them back out the gate. Negan turned back to me and grinned, leather jacket shining under the sun and body moving slow and steady. I watched one of the woman try to catch his eye, one of the old Wives, she gave up as he brushed her off and came back to me.

"Did you miss me?" He ran a hand over my thigh and squeezed it.

"Yeah, Negan." I laughed and he planted a foot on a rock next to the truck like some dark Captain Morgan, "When are they going out?"

"Here soon. We've got to check on a few...installments up and down the road. I won't be gone too long." He grinned and kissed me on the corner of my mouth before getting up and walking away to the factory.

I swung my feet back and forth as one of the nameless Wives walked by me, nose turned up. I smirked behind my water bottle and continued watching everyone mosey around the Sanctuary. He had stopped after awhile, screwing around with the other woman, after I hurt myself a year ago and lost my best friend. So it had become true, what Dwight said all those months ago. 'Negan's girl.' I didn't ask him to stop seeing the Wives but he released them all back to their real husbands and boyfriends. I must have been worth keeping after all. It was more terrifying than I had come to think. I hopped of the truck and went to go find Dwight and his girlfriend.

"You gonna stay here with me forever, baby girl?" Negan turned over in bed, naked chest shining in the afternoon. I smiled to myself as I redid my laces on my boots.

"Yeah Negan I am."

I felt his hand creep up my shirt as his fingers traced a scar on my ribcage, he tugged me back onto his chest and looked down at me thoughtfully as he grinned to himself, happy.

"Good, 'cause I'd have to kill you if you ran away."

And just like that, my blood had run cold every time I looked out the gates, Negan's words always running through me. I opened the door to the greenhouse and was stunned to see it empty for once. Usually Dwight was in here tending the food along with the others. There was a small crash in the back out the doors and I drew my gun, walking forward and knocking over a couple pots on accident as I came to the door and pressed my ear against it. I could hear voices, someone was trying very hard not to yell.

"Dwight?" I knocked on the door and there was silence before it swung open, revealing Dwight with insane hair, "Woah, calm down."

"Melaney. You're late." He glared and stepped back into the room as I took out a couple of syringes out of my jacket and handed them to him. I never bothered to learn his girlfriend's name as well as their diabetic friend, "Thank you."

"How's she doing?" I asked, bending down next to the pixie haired girl and finding her pulse. His girlfriend stood up and paced behind me.

"Not good. Sometimes she's fine and other times I don't know if she'll wake up." She bit her nails as Dwight injected the medicine into her arm and stored the others in the crappy fridge, "We're not good here anymore Kennedy. We need to leave."

"I know. I'm sending out a wanted list with the others when they take off. Any medicine they find to hep her, goes to me right off the bat and then to you. I've promised you that." I looked to her as the diabetic girl moaned in her sleep and weakly wiped the sweat off her forehead, "Wait a month here and then I'll help you leave I promise."

"You're so good to us." she hugged me and Dwight rolled his eyes, "Negan-"

"Negan won't know shit about you leaving...but you should let him know about her. You know he listens to everyone here for their opinions and concerns guys. The only good thing about Negan is that he actually does care about this place."

"Selfish bastard doesn't care about anyone." Dwight bit out then glanced to me, "No offense."

"None taken." I shrugged and heard Negan call for me outside "Stay low of you guys want. Grab some food later, especially her when she wakes up. I've got to go."

I left and they locked the door behind me, I came outside the House and smacked right into Negan's chest. He steadied me and looked to the greenhouse then back to me carefully.

"Why-"

"What'd you call me for?"

"You hiding something from me?" Negan glared at me and I sighed before leading him away from the greenhouse and back towards the factory, "Laney-"

"The girl who's always passing out, she's sick. She needs medicine and we're running out of all types of diabetic medication." I watched him frown then look around in concern before looking back at me.

"You sure?"

"Why would I lie to you?" I followed him back out to the group that was leaving as he started scribbling something down on a piece of paper.

"That it?" He turned to me as he handed the paper over to Steven, I nodded and Negan let go, "Don't come back until you have that shit."

"Got it, boss."

We stepped back as they rolled out and another truck rolled up for Negan, he turned to me and kissed me goodbye as one of the men handed him Lucille. I was left in the dust and watched them leave quickly going opposite of Steven down the road. The gates closed and I retreated back to the building, going up to Negan's room and shuffling through his desk for the map of what we had discovered so far.

There was us, the Hilltop and the dozens of outposts we had along the neighboring town. No new survivors anymore, all of them had attacked us in retaliation, claiming we traded and took too much of their things. It was becoming true, we had at least sixty Saviors now in total and Negan was becoming more violent in getting his points across that no one ever crossed us. There was still an undiscovered area South of us, a city called Alexandria. Nobody had bothered even scoping that place out at all. Maybe next time I rode along on a run I could convince one of the men to head that way.

"Opening the gate!"

I frowned, going to the window and looking down to see Negan's truck roll up again, trunk packed with a small group of people. Holy fuck, they found more people. I shoved the map away and ran out the room and down the stairs to outside. Everyone had gathered, curious of the new group as well.

Only nine people hopped out of the truck but it was enough to make us raise eyebrows. Negan got out of the truck and I stopped as he made them form a line, swinging Lucille around the air as he introduced himself. Routine as always, he'd ask who they were and what they could bring to the table and then decide if they were worth keeping. Lately, nobody had been worth keeping and Lucille saw more heads of humans than Shufflers it seemed. Negan stopped in front of a dirty couple and shook the man's hand.

The man...that woman...

I walked forward, Negan saw me out the corner of his eye and turned to tell me to go back but I stopped anyways.

"Laney, baby girl I need you to-"

"Mom? Dad?"

The couple looked around Negan and their eyes grew until all I could see where the whites of them. My mom stepped forward and Negan stepped back, taken back from the scene.

"Melaney? It's...it's Melaney!"

"Mom!"

I ran into her arms, they were warm and crushed me and my father was crying as he hugged me too. I heard Negan call the other people in their group away as he surveyed the three of us with a blank expression, Lucille rested on his shoulder .

I was crying into her shoulder, crying 'I love you' and 'I missed you so much'. I couldn't understand what they were saying, I don't think they did either as they grasped me like they were afraid I'd crumble into ash if they let go. My dad was telling me how happy he was to see me alive, my mom was criticizing my dirty skin. I didn't let go of them until Negan cleared his throat and stepped forward towards us, hand snaking up my back in warning.

"Mom, dad this is Negan. This is our Sanctuary, I've been with him since the RV flipped. He took us in and...fuck, I'm so happy to see you guys again." I cried happily, hugging my dad again as my mom turned to Negan who was smiling like he wanted to punch them in the face.

"You kept our daughter safe? All this time?"

"Well of course, I love your daughter as much as you do." he commented and I saw the glint in his eye flash but I mostly felt my heart stop at his words, "Ain't that right, baby girl?"

"Negan." I voiced warningly, already feeling my dad tense up at Negan's remark. Negan laughed and shifted Lucille on his shoulder.

"I'm joking! Joking! Please, come inside and spend some time with Kennedy." He gestured to the building with Lucille and I smiled, leading them inside.

I didn't look back in time to see Negan frowning, didn't see the jealous rage in his eyes as my parents kissed me and held me close until they could feel my heartbeat in their skin. I didn't see him give the order to kill the other survivors, I didn't even hear them scream as I led my parents to my old room and closed the door.

"This place has held up quite well. I'm surprised, the places we've been with always fell after a couple months." My dad was looking out my window, looking around the guards below us outside as my mom came out of the shower, smiling.

"It feels so good to shower again, brush my teeth." she sighed and sat next to me on the beat up couch. My dad sat on the table and looked at me carefully, rubbing his clean shaven face from the Jesus beard he had been sporting, "I see your hairs gone back to its original color and length."

"Well yeah mom, I don't exactly have the tools to dye my hair and chop it anymore." I smiled as she pulled at my black strands that had finally grown out evenly a year later, "You guys look good though."

"I'm so sorry about Leo, honey. We know he meant alot to you, he did to us." She grabbed my hand and I nodded.

"I know, I've gotten over it though. It just happens now, I can't stop people from dying by being bitten. I'm sure you guys have seen your fair share of people dying too."

"That we have." My dad nodded, "But this place...is it safe? Negan doesn't seem like a very trustworthy leader."

"Nobody attacks us, we trade with another community and in return we protect them from other groups that want to harm them. Negan...Negan's just a different kind of person dad, you just have to get to know him."

"He seems to know you pretty well."

"I'm not discussing my sex life with you...again." I deadpanned and he shrugged, sharing an uneasy look with my mom, "What?"

"We're not staying honey, our group is going to another in Alexandria. Your Negan picked us up and offered us shelter but, we weren't going to stay indefinitely." My mom was watching me carefully, "You're coming with us."

"I can't just leave Negan and the Saviors, mom. It's not that easy." I stood up slowly, "You guys will be safer here than in a town that only may be alive still!"

"You won't leave Negan, you mean." My dad stood up as well and my mom put out a hand to stop us from arguing, "This place isn't safe, we've heard of Negan and what he does to people."

"Negan chooses-"

"He's a monster, Melaney and you have no place being here with him." He grabbed my shoulders and I couldn't think of a reply, "We've been lost without you for a year, you're going to come with us to Alexandria and leave this place behind."

"Dad...it's not that easy." I sighed and looked down at my boots and he released me, "Leaving Sanctuary isn't that easy for your group or me. For dozens of reasons."

'If you left I'd have to kill you', Negan's voice whispered in the back of my head.

"You're with us now, honey. You don't need Negan, you need a family that actually cares about you." My mom kissed me cheek and I felt my heart drop to my stomach, "We're going to leave in two days but we'll try to negotiate with Negan first. After all, you said he was the most understanding person there was when it came to the well being of his people right?"

"Yeah. He was." I nodded and she seemed satisfied by that before yawning tiredly, "I should let you two sleep. I'll see you guys in the morning."

I kissed them goodnight and walked out of the room and down the walkway to the loft. I would go with them, of course I would. But Negan...I couldn't leave him like that, just vanishing and hoped he wouldn't send men after me and kill my parents in retaliation. I shrugged out of my holster, hanging it up besides Lucille on the wall...I stopped and turned around, Lucille wasn't up on the wall.

A light flicked on in the loft and I turned to find Negan sitting on the couch, hunched over and slowly turning Lucille on the carpet. He looked up at me, eyes bloodshot as I stopped a few chairs away. I walked past him and started taking off my shoes, he was so quiet, he didn't even turn to look at me as I tossed the boots in the corner of his open bed with a bang.

"Your parents...seem nice, Melaney."

"They are." I raised an eyebrow at him at the use of my full name, he looked over his shoulder at me, "Negan, I need to talk to you about something and-"

"Come here."

"Negan I-"

"That wasn't a fucking request." he slammed the tip of Lucille down on the ground with a bang, "Don't make me ask again."

I walked back to him softly and he locked eyes with me, murder clearly sharpening the edges of his black irises. I could feel the tension in the air begin to rise and choke me as he continued to spin Lucille, the barbed wire destroying the carpet.

"I said come. Here." He sat up straighter and I stepped forward until I was in between his open legs, "Good girl."

Lucille was swung up, I jumped thinking he was trying to kill me but instead he trapped me in with the bat pressed against my lower back, forcing me to awkwardly straddle him to not get cut up by the wire.

"Negan!"

"Shut the fuck up." he growled, grabbing the back of my neck and dropping Lucille on the corner of the couch before slamming me down on the pillows and holding me down with his body. I began to struggle as his weight crushed me, he was too heavy.

"Negan please don't do this, please-"

"I don't do that shit. you know that, clam the fuck down." He propped himself on one elbow, the other hand gripping my jaw and forcing me to look at him while his hips were steady on mine, still holding me down. It was silent again, he was breathing hard as he looked down at me, "Say it."

"What?"

"Say you love me." He whispered, and his voice broke, "Say you won't leave me."

I was taken back, he already knew? I sank back into the cushion, pushing his hair back into place as he stared at me waiting.

"I love you."

"Mean it. You have to fucking mean it." Negan hit my hand away and I shoved him off of me only for him to slam me down again with a laugh, "You can't fucking lie to me, I know you better than that."

"Then you're dumb as fuck if you think I don't love you."

He was above me, holding my arms down and his eyes were glazing over. His biceps tensed underneath his jacket before he let go of one of my hands to stare at me, his pupils expanding as I could literally feel the energy in his body began to pump through his skin. In a second he had picked me up along with Lucille and brought us over to the bed, shoving the sheets out of the way as he dropped us. He crawled back over me, one hand fisted in my hair.

"Take it off."

I unzipped his jacket and pulled the scarf over his head, dropping both to the floor as Negan kissed me. He wasn't sweet, that's not who Negan was but in the kiss, in the way he touched me and slid my clothes off I could feel him trying to make up for everything. Negan wasn't a nice person, his smile could kill you faster than a bullet in between the eyes but he wasn't a monster.

Negan groaned as the rest of our clothing fell to the floor and he pulled me closer to him, hands rough as he grabbed and massaged and put the right amount of pressure everywhere on me. A hand in my hair, forcing me to keel back as he deepened the kiss, a hand under my knee as he flipped me over and pressed down on my back with his chest, a rough threatening whisper in my ear to keep the fuck quiet or else.

The completely erotic moan he released when he finally made his way inside of me slowly. A heavy hand on my lower back as he positioned us right and the way he bent over me, whispering what he was going to do to me and shoving his free hand over my mouth to keep from crying out. Sweat started snaking its way between our bodies as the bed began to hit the wall, Lucille clattered to the ground and rolled away as Negan's groans rose and rose and got louder with each flex of his hips.

I loved him.

I woke up to an empty bed, Negan's side still warm. I lazily curled up on his side, could still smell the shitty soap he used. There was a shout outside and more laughter and I got up, retrieving my pants and grabbing one of Negan's old shirts on the ground.

I needed to talk to him about my parents and I still needed to talk to my parents about him. I grabbed my holster off the wall and slipped it on, walking out of the room and down the walkway, saying hello to the other Saviors who were starting their day as well, I stopped as I noticed my parents' door was open.

"Knock, knock." I called out, braiding my hair up in the mirror and waiting for them to respond, "Hello?"

I walked into the room and picked up an overturned chair before making my way into the bedroom to find no one around. I turned around as someone came barreling into the room. Dwight's girlfriend was out of breath and terrified.

"Negan has your parents on the outskirts! They just left!" She yelled. My entire body went cold as she leaned against the wall, "He slaughtered their group yesterday, Melaney. He's going to kill them."

I was out of that room with her right on my feet, sprinting down the steps and out into the yard. The gates closed and I could hear Negan's truck squealing down the road. Steven and the other guards aimed their guns at me as I came running up to the gate.

"You're not allowed-"

"That's my family you fucking fuck!" I screamed, smashing my fist into his face and drawing his gun on the others, holding him hostage, "Listen to me you fat fucks. You grab me a vehicle or I kill each and every one of you right here right now."

"Get her the bike." Steven bit out as I slammed my knee into his back, "NOW!"

I shot out of the Sanctuary like a bat out of hell, the motorbike's tires screeching across the dirt road, I could see Negan's tire tracks still. I heard more bikes start up and shoot out the gates after me but I didn't care.

He had known about their plan and he was going to kill them. He was going to kill my parents.

I swerved into the clearing we called the outskirts. It was just a forest full of dead shufflers but Negan usually reserved it for dumping bodies. The bike slid in the mud and I was flung off of it, rolling away before catching myself and pushing onto my feet.

I stood up, heart slamming in my ears as I strained for voices or to see tire tracks in the mud. I heard the other bikes pull up somewhere to my left and- there! Voices! I started running, slipping on leaves and mud and cutting myself on bark as I hopped up the bank I had crashed into. When I got to the top I hid behind a fallen tree, watching the scene beneath me.

Negan had my parents kneeling in front of him, faces already bruised and bleeding. Negan was pissed, he wasn't speaking to them at all, just couched in front of them, staring with Lucille tucked under his arm. I watched the men that had followed me walk up to him and point in the direction I had gone. Negan looked around and nodded, swinging Lucille in circles a he walked back to my parents.

"Looks like we got a bit of an audience." Negan spoke up, circling my dad with Lucille smacking onto his back, my dad jumped in pain.

"Please, Negan-"

"Did I say you could talk?" Negan laughed, "I don't think I said you could fucking talk, now did I!?"

He raised Lucille and I jumped out, sprinting across the field screaming. Negan was waiting for it, he caught my outstretched arms easily and thew me down on the ground and I rolled away.

"There she is! Your little baby girl am I right, Dad?!" Negan laughed again as Steven grabbed me and knocked me down to my knees, holding me in place with a gun to my head, "Hate to break it to you, Dad but you're little girl got fucked hard last night. By me."

Negan grinned and my dad closed his eyes as Negan bent down to my mom next, grabbing the back of her head and forced her to stare at me.

"And man Mom, you sure know how to raise a dirty little girl. Cried out begging for more while I fucked her from behind-"

"Negan Stop! Please, please don't do this." I pleaded, Steven hit me in the back of the head with his gun and I bent down, clutching where the gun cut me. Negan chucked a rock at him and Steven cursed as it hit him in the side.

"Did I say you could fucking hit her?! No? Then don't fucking hit her!" he swung the bat behind him blindly, nearly cutting my dad's face open, "Can't take a fucking hint these days, these guys. Where were we...oh yeah. You were going to take her away from me."

"She's not yours! Melaney isn't property-" My dad was cut off as Negan smacked him with the hilt of Lucille in the nose. My dad bent over, clutching his face.

"Actually, she is. And nobody's taking her away from me. Not you, not these men, not even those fucking dead things out there. Your girl, is my bitch. Now and forever." Negan knelt down in front of my dad, "So, you wanna die first for trying to take away what's mine or should I beat your wife up in front of you? 'Cause someone's gotta die today."

"Daddy!" I cried out, Steven hauled me to my feet, knife pressed against my throat ordering me to shut up, Negan walked forward to me and Steven let me go as Negan shot him a look. Then it was Negan filling my vision, soft and concerned for me.

"Hey baby, baby girl I'm right here. He ain't your daddy." Negan held my face in his hands, a look of disbelief on his face as he smiled trying to calm me down, "Don't cry baby girl, please don't cry, I don't want to ever see you sad."

"Let them go, please. I won't go with them, Negan please don't." I pleaded again, grabbing his hands. if I gripped hard enough he wouldn't be able to grab a hold of Lucille again. HE shook his head, closing his eyes as if this choice actually pained him.

"That's not how this works baby. You know that." He whispered and I cried out as Steven grabbed me again and Negan dislodged himself before walking back to my parents.

"Mom, Dad I'm so sorry." I whispered, voice breaking.

"We love you." MY mom nodded to me, tears caking through the dirt on her face. She and my Dad kneeled tall, trying not to tremble.

"I love you guys so much. I'm so sorry." I cried, struggling against Steven when Negan stopped suddenly in front of my dad, Lucille raised above his head. He turned to me then back to them with a cold glare, "I love you momma...dad..."

"So that's what it sounds like when you actually love someone." Negan was staring at me, pissed, "You lied to me."

Lucille was swung down, smashing into my mother's skull and splaying her out. I screamed, throat scratching as she fell, body twitching as blood splurted out of her mouth. My dad screamed and Negan kicked him in the face as he hit my mom again until Lucille smacked into the ground.

"Monica!" My dad yelled and Negan turned and swung Lucille as my dad got up, the barbed wire caught him in the stomach and my dad fell back to the ground and Negan swung again, catching him in the throat.

"NO!" I grabbed the knife around Steven's belt and stabbed him, Steven went down, clutching his thigh and I ran at Negan.

Negan blocked my swipe at his face and he blocked the jabs I made at him. Lucille didn't even chip as I continued to swing at his fucking face. The barbed wire clanged against the metal and Negan slammed a boot into my stomach and I fell next to my dad who was still trying to take in breaths as his throat bled out, knife flying away from me and sticking in the ground. Negan cursed and hit the ground with Lucille.

"What the fuck, Laney Why the hell would you make me do that to you?!" He exclaimed, mad at himself for having to actually use violence on me. Negan never hit any of the girls, never even raised his voice at them. Except for me now.

"Daddy...oh god, dad..." I crawled to my dad, cradling his head and putting a hand over his to hold down the blood.

He looked up at me, hands drenched in blood as they closed over mine. My tears hit his face like a waterfall and dripped down his face as he took his last few breaths. I couldn't tell where the pain began and ended in my body as his body went limp, blood still trickling out. I closed my eyes, teeth grinding as I tried not to cry out.

"Laney, look at me."

Lucille, still covered in my parents blood, pushed my chin up so I was forced to look at Negan. He wasn't grinning, he wasn't happy; he wasn't anything. He just looked...dangerous.

"Do it. You've taken everything from me you fucking monster. Let your fucking bat rip me apart, I'd rather be dead than be with you." I spit out, pressing forward so the wire cut into my skin, "I hate you."

"Melaney."

"Fuck. You. Negan."

Negan grabbed me, hauling me up and slamming me on the ground away from my parents, boot pressed to my throat. I didn't even try to fight it as he raised Lucille above his head, just grabbed his foot and closed my eyes. But there was nothing except the sound of Lucille smashing into the dirt besides my head. I looked up at him, as he released me and bent down, hauling me up by his own shirt, which he noticed.

"No. You're not getting away from me that easily." Negan stared at me and kissed me roughly before picking me up and dragging me to the truck by my hair and throwing me in, tying my hands together and shoving my sword back in my holster.

The Saviors lit my parents' bodies on fire and departed after us as Negan headed back to the Sanctuary. I sat in silence, breaking into pieces in the passenger seat, he was right. I didn't love him.

A/N: Alrighty, hope you're enjoying the story so far even with all the changes being made, sorry about that, I really am.

Hopefully the next few chapters going up will please everyone. Thanks!