lostmoonchild: Thanks for the reviews! I got a kick out of Reishin Amara's review and fully plan on writing a crack fic about that (thanks again for the permission) so that'll be interesting to see. Yes, I know it's Saturday and that I didn't update yesterday (actually realized three seconds ago that today's Saturday so ya'll know how out of it I've been) so here's the chapter!
Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.
Chapter Thirty Three
This wasn't the first time he had taken a girl out to dinner but this was the first time he had ever taken a girl from another village out to dinner in her own village. He was grateful that Gaara had taken the time to tell him about some of the restaurants they could go to. When he and Hinata dated, he didn't think he had ever gotten as much support from anybody as he did threats from Neji.
Naruto fidgeted slightly as he looked at himself in the mirror, seeing that his daughter was looking at Jiraiya's book. "Grandpa named you after the main character, right?" Hisoka questioned.
"I guess."
"How come Grandpa and Grandma died?"
The blonde glanced back and saw the look in her eyes. "Well, Grandma Kushina died when Kyuubi got taken away from her and Grandpa Minato died putting Kyuubi in me." Naruto answered.
"How come Grandpa put Kyuubi in you? Why not put Kyuubi back in Grandma?"
"I'm going to love hearing how you're going to explain that one." Kyuubi laughed.
"I have no idea. Come on, I need to finish getting ready."
Hisoka jumped down and followed her father out of the room, giggling as she bounced off the walls. "Did Granny Tsunade know Grandma and Grandpa?" Hisoka questioned.
"Pretty sure she did."
"Did Auntie Tsume?"
"Pretty sure all the grownups knew Grandma and Grandpa. How many of them liked Grandma, I don't know."
A giggle left Hisoka's lips as she grabbed her father's hand, pressing her head against his forearm. "I love you, Daddy." Hisoka said with a grin.
Naruto smiled as he picked her up before playfully dropping her onto Sai's lap. "Special delivery." Naruto grinned.
Sai raised an eyebrow before allowing the squirming girl to roll off his lap and onto the floor. He really didn't understand why Naruto would play roughly with the girl or even why people got pulled into whatever game. "You look nice, Dickless. Hoping to have some kind of relation tonight after your date?"
"It's not a date, you pervert, and I can't believe you just asked that in front of my daughter? No, wait a minute. Okay, yeah, I can believe you just asked that in front of my daughter." Naruto gave his daughter a serious look. "You're not allowed to date until you're as old as Granny Tsunade."
Hisoka gave him a blank stare before grinning. "You're silly! Boys are gross!" Hisoka told him.
Thank gods she didn't find guys interesting but he just needed to wait until she actually began noticing boys. Now he hoped that his daughter would always consider boys to be gross and became a lesbian. "Awesome. Just keep that attitude until you're Granny Tsunade's age." Naruto answered as he pulled on his shoes. "I should be back maybe somewhere around eleven if we decide to go for a walk."
"Just remember to use protection."
"We're not going to do anything!"
Sai smiled as he answered, "You did something with Mishima-san and now the product of your relations is sitting on the floor watching you."
Naruto bit back a comment not wanting to encourage the pale man. "How Sakura deals with your crap is beyond me." Naruto told him. "You don't talk about stuff like that in front of a kid!"
Hisoka made a face trying to understand what was so terrible about what they were talking about. "Have fun, Daddy!" Hisoka said cheerfully.
"Good night, love. Be a good girl for everyone, okay? No sneaking out tonight."
"I won't."
"Good girl. I'll check on you before I go to bed."
"M'kay."
Waiting until her father had left, Hisoka scrambled out of the room determined to find the one person she was fairly certain would tell her everything without getting embarrassed. If she happened to be right then he'd be in his room playing with a new puppet.
(*)(*)(*)(*)(*)
"Ah, son of a bitch!"
Kankuro hissed in pain as he stuck his bleeding finger in his mouth, tasting the coppery liquid on his tongue. He was just grateful it wasn't any of his poisonous weapons that had yet to be put into the puppet or else he'd be in a world of trouble. "Kankuro?" A soft voice questioned.
The brunette turned around and saw the little girl standing in his doorway, a look of curiosity showing on her face. "Come on in, Hisoka. Just don't touch anything." Kankuro told her. "I don't think I can tell you right away what's been put in poison or not."
Hisoka went into the room and watched as he worked on the puppet, her eyes showing anxiety over the various puppet parts. "What're you doing?" Hisoka questioned as she held her hands behind her back.
"Fixing up Karasu." Kankuro replied. "What's going on in your head?"
"I gotta question."
"I'm glad you're trusting me to answer your question but I'm kind of busy."
Hisoka frowned slightly as she sat on Kankuro's bed before answering, "Sai asked Daddy if he and Akina-san were going to have relations. What did he mean?"
Kankuro stopped and looked at the girl in disbelief. "Do you even realize what you're asking me to explain to you?" Kankuro questioned.
"I just wanna know!"
It really should fall on a parent to explain sex to a kid but he had a feeling that a safe answer would be good. "Um, did Naruto call Sai anything?" Kankuro questioned carefully.
"A pervert and then Sai said that I'm the product of whatever Daddy and Momma did."
Okay, so his head wasn't immediately going into the gutter without a reason. "Right. Well, when two people generally care for each other then they have a special hug they do." Kankuro answered. "It's a very beautiful kind of hug that only grownups should do."
"Why?"
"Because if the mommy and daddy aren't careful how they hug then they get a baby."
His response was met with a blank stare before Hisoka said slowly, "So Sai thought that Daddy and Akina-san were going to hug and then they'd have a baby?"
"Sure."
Hisoka wrinkled her nose slightly before answering, "Does Daddy know?"
If he didn't know how in the hell he managed to help create a child, Kankuro was going to sit the blonde down and go into graphic detail. "He'd better seeing as he has you." Kankuro answered. "So you don't freak out there's different types of hugging like the kinds that parents give their kids, hugs that mommies and daddies give each other to make a baby, and hugs that grownups give each other just for fun."
The girl frowned slightly and for a moment Kankuro could almost see the wheels turning in her head. "Kankuro… what's it called what Orochimaru did to me?" Hisoka questioned. "I never asked no one so I don't know."
Was there really anything Orochimaru didn't do to this kid? "Well, I don't know. You wanna tell me and I can tell you maybe?" Kankuro questioned.
"It always hurt and he'd look happy when I screamed. Sometimes if I was bad, he'd put something in my butt and it'd always hurt."
Was there really no innocence left in this girl? He could tell when she was pretending to be innocent just to soothe those around her but now he wondered if she didn't understand the basic concept of sex. "Ah, well, that's something that Orochimaru's burning in the deepest part of hell for." Kankuro told her. "When something like that is done with someone that loves you and that you love, it doesn't hurt."
"But stuff isn't supposed to go in a person's butt!"
Kankuro rubbed his forehead before answering, "How about we talk about this when you're a little older? All I'm gonna say about what that snake-teme did is that no one will ever do that to you against your will ever again."
"Promise?"
"You've got Suna and Konoha willing to protect you as well as nine demons. I think you're as protected as you're gonna get."
Hisoka nodded slightly, appearing to take comfort from Kankuro's words. "Can I watch you make puppets?" Hisoka questioned.
"Sure. Okay, you sit right here and hand me the tools that I need."
"Yay!"
Grateful that the awkward questions were done, Kankuro returned to the puppet with Hisoka happily handing him tools and asking him questions.
(*)(*)(*)(*)(*)
Naruto felt his mouth suddenly dry as he stared at Akina, his eyes holding disbelief. This couldn't possibly be the same medic from earlier. This woman wore a deep green dress that showed her pale skin and her auburn hair fell in curls over her shoulders. "A-Akina-san?" Naruto questioned in disbelief.
Akina laughed and asked, "How many one-armed kunoichi do you know?"
Naruto struggled to keep his eyes at an appropriate level. "This one's at least attempting to keep his eyes where they belong." A young man commented.
Who was this kid? Naruto stared at him for a moment before Akina smiled pleasantly. "This is my neighbor's son." Akina explained.
The young man nodded slightly before watching as Kenji came running into the room and jumped at Naruto. "Hi, Naruto-san!" Kenji said happily.
"Hey, kiddo. What's up?"
"Not much. You're gonna have my mom back before morning, right?"
"Sure."
Apparently pleased by his response, Kenji released the blonde in favor of hugging his mother tightly. "Have fun, Mom." Kenji told his mother.
"Thanks, little man. I'll see you when I get home."
"Okay! Bye!"
Laughing softly, Akina smiled as she looked at Naruto before leaving the house with him following. "You look beautiful." Naruto told her.
"Thank you. You look handsome yourself."
Knowing that he was now grinning like an idiot, Naruto walked with the woman to their destination wondering if this indeed was a date. Deciding that it didn't really matter either way, Naruto settled into the conversation the woman was trying to start and within minutes had her laughing.
lostmoonchild: Now next week we'll be seeing the full extent of Naruto's date with Akina and may even learn some things about this potential love interest. I actually watched the whole Kankuro explaining sex thing in my head and couldn't help but grin at the "special hugs" thing. Hey, we can't have that loveable puppet master around and not poke at him a couple times. So anyway, I hope everybody had a good Thanksgiving and I'll see you next week! Until then, read and review!