WARNING! This isnt a chapter it is a personal note so if u dont wanna read about self harm or what is happening (srry couldnt phrase it better) please dont read.
Hey guys so i want to apologize for not updating i know i go back on my promises a log but honestly as i write this i cant even smile or laugh without tears welling up because im just that down. Idk when it started i hax been thought free for almost a month and then today i just fucked up badly and when i got off the bus i just started to scratch and DIG my nails into my wrist. Now whole i have never actually cut i have come so close. I have written so many "letters" then tossed them because i know i cant do iT. But honestly there are three words i cant say out loud to anh living person barley even to myself. I have teied watching my fav videos i have tried thinking happy thoughts and tonight i just cant seem to get my mind away from the darkest thoughts i can have. Most of my friends mnow i have a damadged mind. They help..some. Now i know some people will see this and be like "You think ur damadged u dont know what damadged is till..." look everyone has a limit and im slowly but surely reaching mine. I know this wasnt what wveryone wants i will try to get back to writin i promise but rn i just need to vent. Now i know mg spelling is HORRID but honestly i dont frankly give a fuck. So yea thx to any one that reads this. Im sure i'll be back to "happy" old me in no time and trying to forget these problems exsist. Bye everyone i promise i will TRY to make the next update a chapter i promise but we all know bow much my words mean.
~sarah