CHAPTER 40

After a restless night, Chuck got up and made his way to the kitchen while Ellie and Devon sat at the kitchen table eating cereal. Hearing him dig out pans, Ellie looked over and smirked. "You cooking?"

"Yeah, I told Sarah to come over for breakfast."

"Nice," Devon said nodding over his shoulder. "Give her a preview of what's to come after she does."

"Ugh," Ellie said smacking his shoulder, then turned to Chuck. "That's sweet. Is there some occasion?"

Chuck thought on how to explain it as he opened the fridge, leaning back to look around it to her and answer, "Important work thing we have to talk about."

Ellie frowned at the grim expression he wore. Picking up her bowl she walked into the kitchen, glancing to Devon still eating his as she set it on the counter asking Chuck, "Is something wrong?"

"New Intersect is coming online today," he said quietly. "I watched Casey hand the piece we picked up last night over to a courier around midnight. They said they're flying it to DC and turning it on tonight. They're trying to say it's the end of our mission, but that means splitting us up." She didn't need to know his suspicions it also meant locking him away or killing him just yet. With Sarah and Casey on his side he doubted they would go so easily.

"Oh," she frowned, rubbing his shoulder. "I'm sure you'll figure something out."

"Which is why I asked her over, then we'll go talk to Casey to figure out how to handle this."

"Chuck if…" Ellie sighed. "If you're as important as they say, you can't really think they'd just leave you here…"

She was a bit surprised to see him laugh, but he was thinking he should've known she'd put that together just as he had. "I think I have a few cards to play to keep them from doing that. I've been helping out a lot and doing pretty well, but even without that… I always have my ties to Orion."

"You'll turn him in?"

"No," he said shaking his head, "but I have access to him others don't, and an upgrade to the Intersect no one else does because of it. And if I really have to I can always turn the Piranha into a white hat. I'd hate it, but at least I'll still be alive and I can be with Sarah in some way."

Ellie smiled hearing him say Sarah rather than her and Devon. As much as she enjoyed knowing she had such an important place in Chuck's life she was glad someone as good as Sarah might surpass her.

After giving him a few tips on how to handle breakfast, Ellie and Devon left for their shifts at the hospital, Chuck offering to wash their bowls. He was switching his focus between the pans with the bacon and sausage, the pancakes loaded with chocolate chips and the eggs when he heard a knock on the door. Setting everything down he contemplated removing the apron he wore, but figured she would get a chuckle out of it so made his way to the door.

Sarah watched the door open and her smile upon seeing him grew noticing the floral apron he wore over his clothes. "Nice."

"Glad you like it. Come in. I hope you like your eggs either scrambled or in an omelette. I screwed up cracking the first one and went with what I know."

"An omelette sounds nice but either's fine," she said shaking her head, following him inside. She could barely hide her smile how after taking a few steps from the door and out of view of the cameras he'd turned to her, removing and throwing aside the apron, his eyes darkening slightly with a hunger breakfast couldn't sate. The moment she closed the door she strode straight into his arms, wrapping her arms around his neck as he pulled her into him and their lips met.

Feeling his hand slide up her stomach she grinned against his lips, bringing her hands to his chest and beginning to unbutton his shirt. She'd moved from his lips to kissing his neck while undoing the last button, moaning against his throat when she felt his hand trace a line down her abdomen, stopping at her waistband. She took a breath to try and steady herself, and mixed with his usual scent was the aroma of bacon and baking pancakes, which made her realize he was in the middle of cooking.

"Chuck," she said pulling her lips from his neck, but he took that as his chance to attack hers, making her gasp as his right hand sliding down her thigh while the left traced a trail along her spine. "The food," she mumbled halfheartedly, eyes fluttering as she felt his kisses on her throat.

She could almost feel him wince, pulling away from her, taking a second to fix her shirt. "Sorry, sorry," he said placing a quick kiss on her cheek. "Sorry."

Watching him hurry over to pick the apron off the back of the couch and dash into the kitchen, Sarah fixed her shirt properly and took a breath to calm herself. No need to rush, she reminded herself, making her way to the kitchen where she found him flipping a pancake before moving on to the bacon, piling a few finished strips onto a plate.

"I'm impressed. I'd expected a bowl of cereal or croissants."

"I thought about it," he said glancing back at her, "but I figured I'd put you to the test and see if you can digest a Chuck-made meal."

"Your sister didn't help?"

"Only in that she taught me how to make eggs years ago," he said with a shrug. "The rest I learned from the instructions on the back of boxes and packages." With a solemn smile he turned to her. "Why don't you get us something to drink and I'll finish up here, then we can eat and have our talk."

Sarah nodded and did just that, setting their drinks with the cutlery on the table and taking a seat, watching him finish up their breakfast and plate it before giving each a once over and serving them. He sat at the head of the table with her to his right, her eyes on him, the door and the window as they started eating.

"So what do you think's going to happen tonight?" he asked after taking a drink once they had their fill.

Sarah set her fork down and sighed looking at him. "They're going to ask one of us to kill you and we're going to run."

Chuck smiled at how one led to the other. "I thought there wasn't anyplace I could run from you?"

"Not from me, no," she said smirking, "but with me? We can run forever."

"That doesn't sound so bad," he said reaching over to hold her hand on the table. "Not if it's with you. But I don't think it'll come to that. We have things we can use to convince them I'm more useful breathing than not."

"Like what? If our record and how good you've done on missions aren't enough-"

"Orion," he said with a shrug. "Piranha."

"NO!" She turned her hand, lacing their fingers and squeezing his. "We're not giving them the Piranha, Chuck. They already want to lock you away if they don't kill you. I won't risk it getting out because the wrong agent finds out."

"It's a last resort," he said quietly. "Before that I'll tell them about my Orion upgrade, let them know I'm in contact with him and if they ever want to ask his help then they need me alive and free. There's also another Piranha option…" Seeing her arch her brow he clarified, "I Piranha them. Dig up all the dirt I can on everyone in power in DC. Let them know it goes public the moment I stop breathing. It shouldn't be too hard to set up a secure dispersal email with whatever I find, even include all the records of everything we've done along with a video from me."

Sarah rubbed her thumb against his finger. "We should prepare that just in case."

"It shouldn't be too hard, it'll just some time…" Chuck looked at their hands before asking, "What if we convince them to leave me alive but not to keep us together? What if they decide it's not worth it, so do like they say and just leave me alone. What if they send you away?"

Frowning, Sarah pulled his hand to her lips. "I don't know. I'll… have to go wherever they send me. CIA agents rarely operate out of the US, so it will be far from here."

Chuck nodded somberly. Part of him had hoped she'd say she'd quit, but he also knew better. He knew being a spy was too important for her to give up. "Would we still…"

"Would you want to?" she asked in barely a whisper.

"I… I guess it depends." He sighed. "I hate myself for this but I know it's better to just be honest."

"Okay," her voice was a bit higher now she knew it wasn't completely doomed, "so what does it depend on?"

"I.. Look, I know it's not great, but I also can't help it really and I… I know I'm not really great about jealousy stuff."

"What do you mean? You weren't before."

"When?" Chuck asked with a laugh.

"Bryce and Lon Kirk," she said quietly, as if that would help him avoid getting upset.

Chuck thought back and shook his head. "You weren't with me. And even then I still was pretty angry, at least with Bryce. I did tell Casey to shoot me just to kill him."

"I would have killed him if he shot you," Sarah said with a glare, squeezing his hand harder than necessary, "and don't you ever do that ever again."

"Fine, fine, uncle," he said until she released his hand. "Look I was still pissed during the whole Bryce thing. I did send Casey in to shoot him after seeing you two kissing in my room. Which really fucking sucked, by the way."

Hearing the spark of bitterness in his voice surprised her, making her realize how awful it must have been. "I'm sorry about that, Chuck."

"Hm." He bit through a piece of bacon as angrily as one could do so, clearly not pleased. "And then the crap with him in your apartment and the flowers. Just because I don't flip out and start swinging at people or calling you names doesn't mean that stuff doesn't hurt. When I saw you with Lon Kirk on the boat I was sick to my stomach, and then you came here and yelled at me for it thinking I faked a flash. Worst was you said it like me not wanting you to go below deck and 'get intimate' with him was somehow the bad thing, not faking a flash. It all hurt like hell, I just made a point of not taking it out on you."

The edge of anger in his voice stung, but not as much as the fact he'd said it all with his head down, sneering at his plate with his arms crossed. She could see he wasn't just upset with her, but was internalizing it as well.

She knew he just needed a moment and then he'd calm down, but she wasn't going to let him need that. Sarah got out of her seat and walked over grabbing his arms and straddling him in his chair, putting his arms around her then grabbing his face and making him look at her. To her relief he had a small smile at her climbing onto him.

"I really am sorry about all of that," she said quietly. "I wish I could take all of it back."

"You don't have to," he said shaking his head. "Why should you? I'm the jealous asshole."

"No, you're not, but you could have been and you weren't," she said gently rubbing the back of his neck. "When you showed up at my apartment and found Bryce I wished you'd have hit him or yelled at me instead of just leaving."

"I didn't think there was a point. I thought you were back with him and like I said we weren't really together." He shrugged. "Even if I'm pissed with Bryce sending you flowers or something I'm not gonna take it out on you since it's not like you can do much about it. It doesn't make sense. When guys hit on Jill at parties I never took it out on. If I got angry with anyone it was the guys hitting on her, and even then I'd just hold her hand or something to try and show I was with her." Thinking back on it he chuckled. "Of course she was a nerd too so was usually caught up in the confidence boost, and if she found out I was jealous she got angry about it."

Sarah realized Chuck hadn't really acted out through the whole Lon Kirk thing despite her concerns he would. The only time he got angry was when she came over to yell at him. Even through the Bryce stuff when he saw them kissing he hadn't taken it out on her but Bryce. When he came to her door and thought the worst he just pulled away.

She also added putting her own ego above Chuck's feelings to the list of reasons she hated Jill Roberts.

"Getting pissed at the girl for getting hit on never made sense," Chuck continued. "Hell, if anyone ever hit on me I wouldn't want someone to get angry at me for it. It's so rare I get a compliment I relish whenever someone says they like my shirt, let alone say I'm attractive or something." He snickered. "You know I actually kind of like the idea of a girl being protective or possessive of me like that. It shows they care at least, right? Either way, I always figured it's better to support each other in those moments. Make sure you both know how you feel about each other instead of driving the person away."

Realizing he'd gone way off course, Chuck shook his head. "My point with all of that is to say I-I can't be cool if you're going to be getting engaged to some Russian mobster or something," he said thinking of Ilsa. "I'm sure it's different with spies, but I'm not a spy.

"It's one thing to kiss a mark, I can... make myself deal with that," he doubted he sounded convincing, but continued, "but anything more and I'll freak out and sink into myself. Even without years of thinking Jill left me for Bryce I'd still have problem with it. I've had enough therapy to know Mom and Dad pretty much guaranteed I'm always going to have those weird abandonment and self worth issues that would make something like that way too much for me to handle. Throw in Morgan and Jill and I couldn't if I tried."

She'd been leaning back to let him speak, but kept straddling his lap, feeling him tense up as he spoke vaguely of the possibility of her with someone else. It felt like his muscles might snap under his skin. "I don't like those missions either. I never have, and I swear I will never take one. I'm yours. You're the only one who gets to touch me in that way, or see me like that."

"Well I still haven't," he said with a halfhearted smile, trying to lighten the mood.

Sarah grinned, relieved he wasn't too lost in things. "Not yet. You will, I promise. But I expect the same is true with you. If I go away I better not find out you've been going around with some brunette game designer or something."

"Never," he said with a scoff. "I'd go voice actress."

Sarah punched him in the shoulder and he laughed. Though a hint of a smile was clear on her lips thanks to his clearly sarcastic tone, she still met his eyes and said firmly. "I'm that girl, Chuck. You're my guy. I'm protective and possessive of you, but like you said as long as you're not the one doing anything I'll try not to take it out on you when I am."

"You really don't have much reason to ever worry," Chuck said with a smirk. "You're incredible. There's no one like you. No one that compares to you. But if you do feel upset about anything let me know. I'll tell you how great you are and we can talk about how ugly the girl you're worried about is. I can be pretty brutal. Ask Ellie about the girl who ran from a party sobbing after she called her a slut for how she met Devon."

Sarah brushed her thumb against his cheek with a hint of pride on her lips. "You don't have anything to worry about either," she said brushing a hand through his hair. "No one I've ever met has measured up to you. No man's ever been even half a Chuck Bartowski."

"So I'm the measuring stick, huh?" he asked with a laugh.

"And it's not fair to anyone else," she said sliding her arms around his neck. "No one can measure up to you. Not for me."

Sarah had just leaned in to kiss him when she noticed Casey storming through the courtyard. For a moment she was concerned but then saw him heading for Chuck's door so closed her eyes and pressed her lips to Chuck's. He grinned against her lips, flicking his tongue against them while sliding his hands up her back beneath her shirt.

When they heard Casey knock at the door she felt Chuck shift as if to stop but she was on top and in control, so pressed down on him and kept her lips to his. She opened her eyes just in time to see him open his and give her a questioning look which she answered with a grin before nibbling his lip.

There was another knock, and then suddenly the door opened. Casey strode into the apartment, throwing the door closed behind him with a slam, but the moment he saw Sarah straddling Chuck at the table he let out a groan. "Come on, Bartowski! We talked about this!"

Sarah pulled her lips from Chuck and looked to Casey, who had turned away from them. Chuck turned his head, his hands still under her shirt. "You walked into my apartment, Casey!"

"Well make yourselves decent. Now."

"We already are, Casey." She gave Chuck a quick apologetic smile, kissed his cheek and pulled herself away from him and onto her feet.

Chuck sighed, closing his eyes. "Give me a minute."

Her lips stretching into a grin, she looked to Casey, who she was surprised to find glowering at Chuck. "What's the problem?"

"I talked to Kathleen," he said glaring at Chuck.

"You did?" Chuck asked, turning in his chair with a grin that faded when he saw the anger on the NSA agent's face. "Oh no, did it not go well?"

"No, it went fine," he said waving his hand, "I'm supposed to go meet Alex and her for lunch."

Chuck got out of his chair, smiling despite his confusion over Casey's tone. "That's great, isn't it?"

"When I told her I want to help with Alex's tuition, she told me I didn't need to. That a few months ago they received a private donation from some nameless friend of mine. She thought I sent it to her after she saw me."

Sarah glanced to Chuck, whose gaze shifted sheepishly. "Oh."

"See at first I figured it was you, but then I realized you don't have that kind of cash to throw around," Casey said moving closer to him, his contained anger rising. "So I thought maybe it was blind luck. Maybe they were one of those veteran's families the Piranha donated to a few months back, but it turned out their money came a few weeks before that. So to me it looks like whoever sent it knew about them before even I did, and the only person who could've given them that money would be the Piranha… but that would mean you told some son of a bitch hacker not just about me, but about my family before you even told me."

"Casey, I didn't-"

"Then it's just luck? He found it out himself?" Casey scoffed, shaking his head. "Just tell me the truth, because we're done, Bartowski. The only reason I'm not putting a damn bullet in you is because you at least told me eventually."

"Casey," Sarah's voice was a warning as she stepped between them, ready to stop Casey if he tried anything.

"Shut your mouth, Walker," Casey said keeping his eyes on Chuck, who was frowning until he heard him snap at her.

"Casey," Chuck said, straining to keep his voice even, "the only reason I'm not going to get angry and make you regret talking to her like that is because you're my friend. But it would make me feel better about not doing something if you would apologize to her."

Casey scoffed. "Is that supposed to be a threat?"

"No, because you're my friend and I won't hurt you, but please don't make me consider it, because if you talk to her like that again I'm going to at least think about it, since if I try to punch you you'll just kick my ass."

Casey stared at him a moment, shaking his head as he scoffed again. "Fine. Sorry, Walker."

"Mm," was all she said, while Chuck nodded and said, "Thank you."

"Now tell me why you told that son of a bitch about my family before me," Casey demanded.

"I never did."

"Don't lie to me, Bartowski!"

He'd taken a few steps forward suddenly and Sarah matched them. Their eyes met and searched each other until Chuck said, "I'm the Piranha." Sarah frowned hearing how defeated he sounded, watching Casey's eyes widen, his gaze shifting from Sarah to Chuck behind her. Looking over her shoulder she saw him frowning, staring at the floor while repeating, "I'm the Piranha."

Looking back to Casey she saw all the pieces click into place in his head, his lips parting before he said, "You're the Piranha."

"The only reason I didn't tell you sooner is because I was worried you might mention it to Beckman as a way to get us more leeway and I didn't want the Piranha involved with the Intersect stuff more than it already is." Chuck shook his head. "I'll only tell them as a last resort to try and make them let me stay active."

Sarah turned and walked over to Chuck, wrapping her arms around him. He managed a smile as he returned the hug, burying his head in her hair briefly before looking over to Casey, who had moved to sit against the back of the couch as he processed it all.

"I promise the money they got can't be traced back to anyone. It all just was in one transaction and then not in another because I deleted the transfer information and put it all through a ton of other accounts to clean it. More than I do for my normal donations. I wanted to make sure no one could ever trace it to them," Chuck assured, watching Casey take it all in and nod slightly.

"We didn't want you to find out like this, Casey," Sarah said pulling away from Chuck, keeping one arm around his back to stand beside him as she looked to the NSA agent.

"How long have you known about this?"

"Since Gaez," she answered with a glance to Chuck. "He found out about the Gentle Hand and targeted Gaez, then found out about the CAT Squad and brought it to me."

"I thought of so many ways to tell you," Chuck said quietly. "At first I thought about trying to figure out your Gaez, or revealing it on some big case where we needed a hacker, but I decided to ask for you help with my next target. Alexei Volkoff."

"You're going after Volkoff?" Casey gaped.

"Only a couple days, but yeah. I'm running traces on everything I can about his businesses. I figured once I had something I'd go to you guys with it. I'd bring you in on the whole Piranha thing and we could all work it when we aren't doing our normal stuff."

"You thought we'd take down the world's most notorious arms dealer on the side?" asked Casey.

"Well yeah," Chuck said as if it were obvious, "it's us."

Sarah looked to him with a smile, leaning against him while Casey snickered and shook his head. "Well we'll have to survive the day and make sure there's still an us."

"What do you mean?" asked Chuck.

"I was told last night I'm getting the order," Casey said looking to Sarah, whose arm tightened around Chuck. "After the Intersect goes online they'll call me."

"What did you say?" Sarah asked, voice calm and cold, though not threatening. She knew Casey wouldn't go through with it.

"I tried to tell her about Chuck's use beyond an asset but she ignored it. Graham's set on the kill but even she's still set on the bunker."

"We could tell her about Orion," Chuck offered. "Tell her I have an upgrade from him and am in contact with him. I can get others too. I-I was thinking about asking for some combat upgrades so you guys don't have to worry about me so much."

"Orion's been running for a long time," Casey said crossing his arms. "We just hand him over?"

"No, we tell them if they want contact with him they go through me and for him to talk to them I have to be alive and active, and I'll only be active with you two as my team." Chuck looked between the two. "If that won't work then I could Piranha them and everyone else in power. Set up an actual kill switch where if I'm not around all their secrets, including all the stuff with me, will go public."

"You will not blackmail government officials," Casey said firmly.

"I will if it's that or dying," said Chuck.

Casey rolled his eyes. "Not until you're running, Moron. For now you're just an idiot who got stuck with the Intersect and rose to the occasion. Not a criminal."

"I am still the Piranha," Chuck noted. "A wanted criminal."

"Only wanted for crimes linked to his helping put away and robbing scum and helping people. Not blackmailing people. The moment you do that you cross a line. I won't let you do that, not until you have to. If it comes to it you'll run and then you do that. But until then the Piranha keeps to his usual targets."

"Will you help us?" Sarah asked, taking her arm from around Chuck.

"I'll help you get away," he said with a nod. "Tonight we'll have you two meet for dinner here, just the two of you and I'll come in just as you show up Walker. I'll say I figured I'd have you as backup in case Chuck surprised me, but you turned on me and knocked me out and escaped with Chuck. Beckman will give me a few days to track you on my own and I'll bullshit around. After that she'll bring in people and I'll try to keep you informed. After lunch with Alex I'll buy two burners and drop one off here."

"Casey... Thank you," Chuck said somberly.

The NSA agent shook his head. "No. Thank you. Not just for Kathleen and Alex, but everything. You're a good person, Chuck, and I only kill bad guys."

AN:

I had a different title for this chapter but I thought I might save it for later if it comes around and, well... puns.

Originally had more talk of what Jill was like, but cut it cause it was along enough and I can always include it later if necessary. The Jill episodes won't be for a while, nor will a bunch of the season 2 episodes. It's still only around april or may, so it'll be a while before we're ready for a Christmas episode or anything. I moved the events for the first few episodes up mostly to allow certain events to happen leading into other plots.