lostmoonchild: Ohayo! Thanks for the review! Okay, so you guys remember me telling you that there was a chapter that made me grin cause it's Sasuke abuse? Well, this is it. So it's about eight in the morning here and the only reason I'm up this early is cause I'm trying to update before my friend comes and helps me move out so that'll be fun... maybe. Anyway, here's this week's update!
Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.
Chapter Fifty Five
He had been told to stay three hundred yards away from Hisoka and he was approximately three hundred and seven yards away from the girl. He was just waiting for her to get a safe distance away from the apartment with that boy before he went in and talked to Naruto. Then they could attempt to figure out what in the hell was going on that felt wrong.
When the girl had vanished from sight, Sasuke slipped into the apartment and yelled in surprise when he was suddenly hit with a frying pan. "Who the hell are you?" A woman with auburn hair screamed at him. "Naruto! There's some bastard breaking into the apartment!"
"Knock it off, you crazy bitch!" Sasuke shouted back as he avoided another blow to the head. "Dobe!"
Naruto came running into the living room and fell against the wall laughing as he stared at the scene before him. "It's okay, Akina. I know him." Naruto laughed. "That's Sasuke Uchiha."
Twang! Thud.
Sasuke fell onto the floor and glared up at the woman as he rubbed the growing lump on his head. "The hell was that for? The dobe just said who I am!" Sasuke shouted at the woman.
Akina twirled the frying pan before answering, "I know. That's why I hit you again."
There was a hidden sadistic look in her eyes as Akina smiled at him, her entire body language telling him not to make a wrong move or else he was going to get hit again. "Akina, don't give him a concussion." Naruto chuckled as he gently pried the frying pan away from the woman.
"It's tempting." Akina reminded the blonde.
"What are you doing here, teme?" Naruto questioned finally focusing his attention on the raven.
Sasuke slowly got off the ground, making sure to stay out of reach of the insane woman. "I need to talk to you." Sasuke told him.
"Obviously if you're willing to sneak into the house instead of going through the door like a sane person." Naruto replied with a grin.
Akina glanced between the two men before sighing to herself. "I'm gonna make some tea. Would you like some, Uchiha-san?" There was a smile on her face that told Sasuke he'd better be careful how he replied.
"If I say yes, are you going to poison it?" Sasuke asked coolly.
"I'm a medic. I took a vow to cause no harm to any human. Thankfully you don't qualify as human to me so we're good." Akina replied smoothly as she slipped into the kitchen.
Sasuke gave the blonde a look that clearly demanded to know if he was serious. "Please tell me you're not planning on dating that." Sasuke said with a frown.
"Yep."
"Did all those blows to the head mess up your brain? She hit me with a frying pan twice then basically said she'd do something to my tea. You're seriously dating that?"
"Be nice. If you don't want to get beaten up by Akina then go through the damn door." Naruto told him. "Now what do we owe this visit?"
Sasuke sighed softly before answering, "I don't think we succeeded in killing Madara."
Naruto stared blankly for a minute before answering, "Sasuke, he's as dead as he's going to get. Nobody survives a Chidori and Bijuu Rasengan."
"Nobody survives Amaterasu either and he did." Sasuke responded. "Something isn't right, Dobe, and you can feel it but you're too busy trying to play family that you're ignoring your gut."
"What makes you think that Madara Uchiha's alive? Is there even any hardcore proof?"
How in the world did he explain what his gut was saying when he was fairly certain that the idiot could feel it in his own gut? "What happened to the knucklehead that didn't wait for proof before jumping in?" Sasuke questioned patiently. "I'm willing to bet even the Kyuubi can feel it and that soon, there's going be letters to that violent Hokage and maybe even a few visits from the Jinchuuriki wanting to make sure that little girl of yours is safe or wanting protection."
"Hate to admit it, but the bastard's right." Kyuubi grumbled. "The ones that were abandoned by their host's village won't be so eager to trust the leaders for protection. It won't matter if their hosts are secret to the rest of the world or not."
Great. "How certain are you?" Naruto asked finally.
"As certain as the knowledge that those books Kakashi reads are porn." Sasuke gave the blonde a weary look. "If I were you, dobe, I'd be figuring out how to keep the Kyuubi from attacking the village again."
"The Uchiha bastard controls me and it's my fault the village got destroyed?" Kyuubi shouted. "That's complete bullshit! Yes, I'd like to wreck your village but on my own terms!"
As if that's going to convince anybody to let you run around without supervision. Naruto thought darkly. "It's not going to happen again, teme." Naruto said with absolute conviction. "I don't care if every bone in my body is broken, I will not allow anybody to take Kyuubi from me."
Even as the words left his lips, Naruto could feel a twisting anxiety in his gut. "Even so," said Sasuke as Akina brought out the tea, "how are we going to keep anything from happening?"
"I think," Akina said as she served them tea, "that you two idiots need to first make it clear where your relationship will stand then let Lady Hokage know. Then you two idiots can start figuring out how in the hell you're going to keep some major disaster that may not happen from even happening."
"Gaki."
What, teme?
"Two things. One, never piss her off when she has access to a frying pan. You may have to drag the Uchiha to Sakura to check for a concussion."
So what's the second thing?
"Don't die or your corpse will be beaten by at least two women."
Gulping slightly at the warning, Naruto offered Akina a grin. "Well, me and Sasuke are gonna go chat and figure out what we're gonna do." Naruto quickly got up and pulled the Uchiha to his feet. "C'mon, teme."
The two men rushed out of the apartment and down the street before Naruto relaxed enough. "You had to choose somebody that's even more terrifying than Sakura when she's having her period." Sasuke said flatly.
"Honestly, teme, I had to choose a redhead." Naruto responded with a grin. "Speaking of Sakura, though, we're going to go see her."
"Why?"
"Two bashes to the head with a frying pan is bound to give you a concussion."
Before he could protest, Sasuke found himself being dragged to where he suspected Sakura was staying.
(*)(*)(*)(*)(*)
"So who did this happen again?" Sakura questioned as she healed the bumps on Sasuke's head.
"Sasuke and Akina met." Naruto said simply as he flipped through a magazine. "She happened to have been washing up a frying pan and spotted him entering through the window so she bashed him one. They yelled at each other, I came in and told Akina who Sasuke was, then she hit him again."
On the one hand Sakura could find humor in the whole situation but on the other hand, she knew she should have made Akina heal up the damage she had caused. "Well, it's not a full concussion. There's a hairline fracture from the second hit." Sakura informed the two men.
"Dobe…"
"Don't be a baby about it." Sakura told the Uchiha calmly. "It's healed up but I suggest that you use the door when you go to visit Naruto."
Glaring slightly at Naruto as if it were the blonde's fault, Sasuke huffed slightly in irritation. "You had to choose a woman with a temper." Sasuke grumbled. "How in the hell did you two meet anyway?"
"She's a medic and Hisoka was in the hospital. It was bound to happen."
Having the distinct feeling that he was going to essentially be dealing with a guard dog any time he wanted to talk to Naruto, Sasuke sighed to himself. From now on, he supposed, he'd just have to either bring a peace offering or duck if he wanted to avoid a broken neck or bashed in skull. "At least you're not marrying the psycho." Sasuke grumbled.
A pause forced the Uchiha to look at the blonde in disbelief. "I love that look." Sakura laughed as she watched Sasuke.
"You can't be serious! She's violent!"
"She's got personality."
"So does a rabid animal!"
"Careful. She's gonna be the mother of my kids."
Sasuke narrowed his eyes at the blonde before answering, "You reproducing once is scary enough but now you're planning on reproducing again?"
"At least once more. It depends on how many Akina wants to have seeing as there's already two kids living with us."
The more time he spent around Naruto today, the better being wiped out by Madara seemed to be getting. "Great," he grumbled. "Just fuckin' great."
lostmoonchild: Yeah, I'm still grinning over the whole chapter and I really don't see Sasuke and Akina having a real great relationship. So I'm gonna vanish so I can get stuff finished up so I'll see everybody next week! Read and review!