A/N: Please don't hate this chapter too much I'm especially bad at writing James POV but here goes nothing

Disclaimer: Also again the characters, place and 99% of everything is J.'s

#1 Never upset emotionally unstable girls

James POV

After Rose stormed out we all sat there in silence until Lorcan Scamander entered. He went to kiss Lily's cheek but instead got my fist. On his cheek just to clear anything up. He stumbled back cupping his cheek and squeaked out a thin dude.

"Scamander if you ever go to kiss or touch my sister in my present again a black cheek isn't all you'll be worrying about." I whispered menacingly. I banged the door shut as I exited only grabbing my uniform to change into. I slipped into the nearest bathroom to change. Why the hell did Scamander put me in that position? I said that Lily was young to date to his face and then the dude kisses her and looks surprised when I hit him. Bloody git what did he think I'd do sing praises of adoration. I stalked out and down the train angrily until I noticed Keni Brown wiggling her way to me.

"So James I heard that your this year's favourite for Head Male captain of the school. I birdy also told me that you're Quidditch Captain this year." She said slowly while lowering her eyes lids and relaxing into of the inside walls of the train so that ended in the effect that she about to fall asleep.

"Not now Keni and is it possible to be Head captain and Quidditch captain?" I asked her as I walked around her. I ignored her calling after me. My mother had raised me on principals and I refused to break them. I thought back on all the pranks I had played over the years that broke basically everything she had tried to teach me. I refuse to break one of them I silently amended. Then I released all that I may have broken the one about always treating lady's proper and not, um, handling them until your engaged. To be fair I have my own rule about not even bring up the subject until you've been dating for three months, see I'm not a total prat. Engaged, gaged is it only me who seems to notice the similarities between those words. I was almost to the Gryffindor compartment when someone's nails digging in to the flesh on my arm stopped me in my tracks.

"Jamiese we wouldn't want to miss a time to play would we?" Keni asked clutching my arms in her paws. I had a sudden vision of her turning into a vulture and devouring me while cocking her head side to side to whisper Jamiese. I shivered and pushed Keni off and opened a compartment and sat her down. I put on what I've been told is my most caring look.

"Keni I'm sure you're a lovely person under that makeup, glitter and whatever else you've put on your face and you mean well but at the moment your acting like a slut. I don't date or have anything to do with sluts so I'd appreciate if you could leave me alone." I told her brusquely I turned my back on her and dropping the act.

"Having a bad day then because you know I can find a way to make your irritation go away." She called slightly insane as I was about to step out of the room. I all but ran down the corridor. I went past Ian Kiderck before backtracking he was what the blokes at Hogwarts called distractor. A distractor simply distracts the predator (slightly insane girl who's chasing you) letting you, the prey (slightly afraid but still completely sane guy) to walk away never have to trouble yourself again with the predator unless of course you hire a bad distractor. Ian Kiderck is the best in the business being somewhat gorgeously ravishing as Lily had once put it and completely utterly gay. Girls are always hoping that he'll change his mind through so he has no shortage of admires in the female department. Plus once the Predator (slightly insane girl who was chasing you) gets there sights set on Ian he can always use the line oops sorry I forgot I'm gay ciao and walk away.

"Ian, I need your help Keni Brown is after me." I yell shaking him forcing him to break of conversation with a girl he was talking to.

"James unless you haven't already noticed I'm already on a job."

The girl who he was talking to asked "You were distracting me, ugh." She then walked off sighing and muttering.

"So are you free now?" I asked. He nodded in confirmation.

"What I want in return is definite spot in the team for my little sister Georgina as a beater." I replied.

"I can't do that Ian." I told him I would never go so low.

"I can see Keni" he said stretching on to his tippy toes to get a look over all the heads in the corridor.

"Oh I can really see Keni now and boy does she look mad James. What did you do? Set her hair on fire." I paled Keni was the best in our year at curses/hexes/evil potions and anything else that involved hurting someone.

"Fine, fine just work your magic on her double time and Georgina's on." I starting turning away but Ian stopped me pushing an envelope into my hands.

"Head to the Slytherin compartment and hand this to the person who is manning the door it's the only way to get in unless you're in Slytherin." I nodded thankful that for once Keni was a Gryffindor not Slytherin no matter who much shame it had brought to our glorious house. I was one more carriage away from one haven when I saw Rose be brushed off my Scorpius Malfoy. I turned as I saw heard commotion. Ian was following a furious Keni as she ran at me. My limbs were frozen, shocked, until Ian yelled "She's out of control, run for your life James, RUN." I stumbled a little trying to make my limbs move. My robe billowed behind me as I spirited for the safety of the Slytherin's arms. God I never thought I'd say that.