The day dawned golden and warm with the barest hint of autumn in the air, but Kaidan barely noted the beauty of it at all. He emerged from the hall, blinking and rubbing his swollen eyes. It had been a long night with nothing but fitful dozing in the chair he'd dragged from the main hall into the med bay.

By some stroke of luck, Garrus had made it through yet another night. He was still only just clinging to life, but every day he continued to live gave him a better chance at making it. The main concern now was brain damage. Several times now his heart had stopped and Doctor Chakwas was worried that this had caused injury that she could yet test for.

Since the morning after the night he'd spent in Catherine's cabin, Kaidan had barely left the hall, and he'd yet to see her again. What mattered now was being at his friend's side. If Garrus died and Kaidan wasn't there, he would never forgive himself. Catherine would understand, and if she didn't, well, then she wasn't the woman Kaidan thought she was.

Tali met Kaidan at the door, looking out at the glowing dawn with hope in her eyes.

"Today feels good," she said softly. "I think something amazing is going to happen today."

Kaidan looked down at her. He envied her ability to be endlessly optimistic. In spite of everything, she held out unassailable hope that they would look down on Garrus soon and find him awake and perfect.

"I sure hope so, Tali," he replied. "I sure hope so."

They stood together admiring the glorious new day before them. Birds sang and flitted about in the tress. Insects already heavy with pollen flew from flower to flower. Dew glistened on the sloping metal roofs of the houses.

They had stopped building at forty as couples moved in together. Space enough was left around them for expansion and other buildings were starting to take shape among them. New toilets at the far end so people didn't have to travel as far in the night. A woodworking shop for Joker. Most recently, as far from everything else as they could manage it, a tannery, to prepare the hides of all the creatures the hunters brought back. At the peak of the day, the settlement actually looked like a bustling little village.

While most people were working on the expansion of the hall and its new hospital space, a number of people had began digging for a cold cellar. While the Normandy had held space for a large amount of fresh food, the bulk of their rations had been freeze dried, vacuum packed, or dehydrated and had been stored only in crates. Now, the majority of their food stuff was fresh and had to be stored somewhere it would keep.

The digging was hard work and everyone did their share, but it was slow going and Kaidan doubted it would be done before winter.

"I guess someone else is going to have to take the hunters out until Garrus is on his feet," Kaidan wondered aloud.

"Kaidan, I owe you an apology," Tali interjected suddenly. "I haven't been a very good friend to you. I tried to think what Shepard would do if she were here, but now I realize that she would never have acted this way. The way I have. Relationships are about ups and downs, and I have no right to punish you. Especially when I know you are punishing yourself already."

"I deserved it, Tali," he said contritely. "I was jerk. I owe a lot of apologies right now."

"Well, you don't owe me one," Tali said with a sweet smile as she ran her three fingered hand through her tangled hair. "I do have a favour to ask though. I know you're just as tired as I am, but I haven't bathed in three days. Living outside my suit is so dirty. Would you stay a little longer while I have a shower?"

Kaidan chuckled. "Of course."

He touched his omnitool to hers to create a secure link. "I'll let you know if anything changes."

"Thanks, Kaidan," she said as she hurried off to the showers next door.

Kaidan stood on the path for a few minutes more and then went back inside. The earliest of the early risers were there already, eating breakfast and preparing for the day. Several asked after Garrus and Kaidan gave them the best news he could, which was that the turian was still alive.

EDI met him at the door to the labs and was nearly bursting with excitement.

"Kaidan, as you know, this morning I attempted the amplify my hearing to listen to Garrus' heart sounds in more detail," she said, her eyes sparkling through her visor as she lead him into the labs and away from the medical suites. "Instead I detected a weak signal coming through on the quantum entanglement communicator. We have a signal to Earth again. Admiral Hackett would like to speak to you."

"Is anyone with Garrus?" Kaidan asked, eager to speak to the Admiral, but equally mindful of the promise he had just made to Tali.

"Liara and Javik are with him," EDI replied. "I still find prothean behaviour difficult to interpret at times, but I believe Javik has been... distressed of late and wished to speak to Liara alone."

"All right then," Kaidan said with a nod. "Let's go talk to the Admiral."

The quantum communicator ate up massive amounts of power and they'd kept it powered down most of the time, with only the audio signal active to alert them. However, they'd had no communications since the spring and they had not been monitoring it as closely during the summer months while there was so much other work to do.

As Kaidan stepped up to the console a familiar blue figure flickered into existence.

"Major Alenko, I'm relived to see you're still alive," the Admiral said, clearly extremely happy to see Kaidan and EDI. "We've been unable to raise you for months."

"It's good to see you too, Steven," Kaidan leaned forward with his hands on the railing and tried to look as happy as the Admiral did. "EDI only just detected your signal today."

"I have a theory in regards to our inability to receive your hail," EDI spoke from beside Kaidan. "We only just entered the later half of the year. I believe that our ability to communicate off planet it determined by our orbit around the sun. This also allows me to calculate an rough estimate of our position in the galaxy. I do not believe we are as far away as I originally hypothesized."

Kaidan looked at EDI in surprise. He knew she could calculate more quickly than any other computer, and certainly more quickly than a human, but given that they had only just received the signal, this seemed particularly fast.

"Given that Joker only took the Normandy through the Charon relay, and how long we were in transit, and in addition to the direction I now calculate Earth to be in, I theorize that we are somewhere in unexplored space between the Local Cluster and the Viper Nebula on the outer fringes of the galaxy," EDI concluded.

"That close?" Kaidan and Hackett said almost in unison.

"Given the inaccessible nature of the majority of space between these two locations, close is relative. We might as well be in the Valhallan Threshold or the Far Rim."

"EDI, why did you initially think we might be beyond the Perseus Veil?" Kaidan asked, confused at this revelation.

"During our flight, my ability to accurately measure the passage of time was altered by the energy wave created by the activation of crucible. I have only recently been able to access all of the internal footage from the Normandy allowing me to piece together an accurate timeline. The apologize for the inaccuracies."

"Do we not have star charts of this area?" Kaidan asked.

"Yes, but they are incomplete and antiquated," EDI explained. "The relay network controlled the movements of all species and very few ever bothered to look beyond the systems the relays allowed them access to. As such, vast swaths of the of space between relays with significant distance between them remain almost entirely unexplored."

"Hang on a second," Hackett said. "The Alpha relay was destroyed along with the entire Bahak system. How could the Charon relay have sent you there?"

"I have a theory on that subject as well, Admiral," EDI said with a confidence that said her theory was more than an educated guess. "It is possible that rather than riding the energy beam between relays, we were in fact riding the energy wave cast out by the exploding relays. The Viper System is the only named system in that region of space, which is why I used it as a point of reference."

Hackett rubbed at his chin and nodded. "Well, whatever way you look at it, it's nice to have some idea where you are."

EDI excused herself and returned to the medical suite leaving Kaidan to speak to the Admiral privately.

"How are things on Earth?" he asked, eager for news.

"Improving rapidly," Hackett said. "Having the most brilliant people from every species in the galaxy is definitely improving our odds of survival."

"If the salarians could make Tuckanka liveable, they can make Earth healthy again," Kaidan said, thinking of Captain Kirrahe and the other brave, brilliant salarians he'd met over the course if his career.

"My thoughts exactly," Hackett agreed. "England is a wasteland. As is much of mainland Europe. But North and South America fared much better and most of the remaining population has been relocated there. Africa is relatively unharmed since the continent was made a Galactic Historic Site after the First Contact War, and so much of Asia is so remote that other than the major cities it saw little action."

"That's good to hear. And what about the asari fleets? Have they left for Exodus yet?"

"Interesting news on that front as well," Hackett said, sounding upbeat. "Not only have they left, but they convinced most of the krogan to go with them. Many of the older members of each species elected to stay and live out that last of their days, but the younger have all left."

Kaidan let the Admiral keep talking when he realized it was obviously doing the old man some good. He learned that the geth had shut down as many of their active platforms as they could, uploading into the suits of the quarians trapped on Earth. Those that hadn't were taking care of clean up on parts of the planet that had become hostile to organic life.

Earth was becoming a planet shared by humans, asari, turian, salarians, quarian, and even batarians. Very few elcor and volus had survived the battle and it was likely they would die out within a generation or two since their physiologies made life on Earth extremely difficult for them.

"Earth has become possibly the most diverse planet in the galaxy," Hackett concluded. "I won't lie though. I don't miss the vorcha. They were horrible."

Kaidan laughed, loudly and with more energy than he had in a long time. "I agree with you there, Steven."

"So, how are things there?" Hackett asked, sitting down in a chair someone had brought him.

"Thing are going well, all things considered," Kaidan told him. "We're dealing with a bit of a crisis at the moment. One of our hunting parties was attacked. We didn't lose anyone, but things aren't looking great for Garrus."

"I'm sorry to hear that, Kaidan," Hackett said with a sad shake of his head. "I hope he makes it."

"Me too," Kaidan said, glancing towards the medical suite to see Tali slip quietly inside and hoped she hadn't heard his thoughts of Garrus' outlook. "It's not all bad news though. Morgan O'Naill and James Vega just had the first baby a day and half ago. Healthy baby girl."

"Congratulations!" Hackett said with a rare smile. "I always thought Vega had it in him to be a good father."

"There are three more on the way," Kaidan elaborated. "Most likely in the early winter. We're still trying to decide how to calculate age. Our year is now almost twice as long."

Kaidan paused and wrinkled his brow.

"What is it, Major?"

"I just realized that means I'm thirty-seven, not thirty-six," Kaidan said, feeling suddenly older. "Funny how one year can make you seem so much closer to forty."

"You're still a young man, Kaidan," Hackett said reassuringly. "Besides, who knows how long we'll all live now with synthetics running through our veins."

"That's very true," Kaidan acknowledged.

"Kaidan, is there anything that we can do to help you?" Hackett changed topics quickly and Kaidan wondered if perhaps he had a limited time with access to the comm.

"If the signal is strong enough it would be great if you could get some information for us. EDI has helped us figure out a lot, but we're running out of supplies and we'll need to start manufacturing things to replace them."

"Anything in particular?" Hackett asked.

"Clothing. A lot of our equipment is durable and will last a lifetime, but our kids are going to need something to wear. We've identified some plants that could be used like cotton and hemp, but we haven't got a clue how to get from raw material to finished product. And soon we are going to need a lot of diapers."

Hackett was laughing now and it took Kaidan a minute to find the humour.

"I guess our needs are going to be pretty different from here on out," Kaidan said.

"That they are, Kaidan," Hackett said, still smiling. "We'll send you anything and everything we can."

"We'll leave the data link open from now on."

"Before I go," Hackett said with a glance at someone off the platform that Kaidan couldn't see. "You're situation has become something of a legend here. People are clamouring for news, particularly those who served with Shepard when the Normandy was a Cerberus vessel. Do them a favour and start naming things. The planet, the moons, hell, even the settlement. Give them something to think about."

Kaidan nodded. "It's a good idea, Admiral. We've bounced around a few ideas here and there. Maybe it's time to come up with something concrete."

They exchanged a few more pleasantries and then signed off. Kaidan shut down the audio and visual, but left the data link open and set up several dump files to catch the soon to be incoming information.

Feeling drained and desperately in need of food and a shower, Kaidan started for the hall then remembered he'd seen Tali come back. He diverted to the medical suite and entered to find Tali, EDI, Liara and Javik all standing close around Garrus's bed. His heart dropped.

"What happened?" he said as he rushed to the turian's bedside.

The small crowd parted and Kaidan arrived at the end of the bad to find Garrus awake and looking at him with the turian equivalent of a smile, his mandibles twitching slightly with laughter.

"Shit, it's good to see awake, Garrus," Kaidan said joyfully and patted his friend on the foot.

"Good to see you too, Kaidan." His voice was raspy and the flanging effect was less audible than usual, but he sounded good.

"I assume this means you're going to be all right and we can all go get some sleep?" Liara asked, giving the turian a loving smile.

"I feel like I nearly had my head ripped off... Oh wait, I did." Tali swatted at him and then leaned down to kiss him passionately.

"Man, turians heal fast," Kaidan said.

"We'll leave you two alone," Liara said as she took Javik's arm and headed for the door.

Kaidan gave Garrus a mock salute over Tali's head and followed them. His relief was immeasurable. Suddenly things felt like they were taking a very welcome upward turn. Desperate to refresh himself and go in search of Catherine, he made to leave, but Javik blocked his way.

"Major, there is something I must discuss with you." Ever the solider, Javik was the only who still called Kaidan by his rank.

"Can it wait, Javik. I really need to get something to eat."

"No," Javik said adamantly. "This cannot wait."

Liara put a hand on Javik's arm and turned to Kaidan. "It can wait, but it is important."

Kaidan sighed, once again putting his conversation with Catherine on hold. "Okay. Let me eat and shower and I'll meet you back here in an hour."

Javik did not look pleased, but Liara agreed and they left the lab talking quietly together. Kaidan wondered just what was going on between the two of them.

He'd barely seen Javik all summer. The prothean much preferred his own company and spent little time with the rest of the crew. Though he had his own Spartan little house, he rarely slept there, and no one really seemed to know where he spent his nights.

The few times Kaidan had talk to him, Javik had said this was the cleanest place he had ever been and he was trying to come to terms with being 'at peace'. After a lifetime of war, he didn't know how to function with a weapon in his hands and an enemy to face.

Liara was often the only other person Javik would speak to and a few people wonder if maybe the two of them were becoming an item, though Kaidan suspected not. Javik had already broken Liara's heart once after the battle at the temple on Thessia.

Shutting it from his mind for the time being, Kaidan wolfed down a breakfast of fruits and porridge, had a hurried shower where he shaved away the scruff from his cheeks, and made a quick visit to see James, Morgan, and Lola.

Morgan was too much in love with her new daughter to continue hating Kaidan and she greeted him with an exhausted smile from the bed where she nursed the baby while James slept on a chair by the window.

It was the first chance Kaidan had had to talk to Morgan since the birth. She looked radiant, if tired and still somewhat pale.

"How are you?" Kaidan asked as he pulled up a wooden stool to sit beside the bed and look down at Lola where she sucked contentedly at Morgan's breast. Not a shy woman by any stretch, Morgan had no issue breast feeding in front of anyone who might be around.

"I'm doing okay," she said as she stroked her daughter's downy head. "Incredibly sore, but also incredibly happy. How's Garrus? Any change?"

"He's awake. Tali and EDI are with him and I'm sure Karin as well by now."

"Good. Maybe James will relax now."

Kaidan looked at James asleep in the chair, his legs splayed out in front of him and his head tipped back with his mouth open.

"He looks pretty relaxed." Kaidan observed.

"I had to drug him," Morgan admitted. "He hadn't slept in days. I was getting worried about him."

"He's not going to be happy."

"Tough," was all Morgan said, casually switching Lola to her other breast.

Kaidan stood to leave. "I'm glad you're doing well. I've got to run."

"Rumour has it you were with Cat the other night," Morgan said softly without looking up at him.

He didn't reply. He wasn't sure what exactly had happened between himself and Catherine and didn't want to say anything until he'd figured it out.

"Who told you that?" he finally said.

"Doesn't matter," Morgan shrugged, earning a tiny squawk from Lola. "Just don't slide back into whatever funk you've been in. She loves you. Now go away."

If she hadn't been smiling Kaidan might have been offended, but he gave her a half smile in return and left. As he made his way back to the hall he tried not to let Catherine come back into his mind. He didn't have time yet to dedicate the effort he wanted into figuring out what to do about that whole relationship.

Forcing the thoughts to the periphery, he bounded up to the hall feeling lighter and happier than he had in some time. He found Liara and Javik sitting together at a square table in the back corner, a relatively private place, and joined them.

"What's up guys?"

Javik and Liara looked at each, and she nodded, looking down at the table as the prothean spoke.

"Major, in the London city, did Shepard repeat to you what I told her about my plans after the battle?"

"There wasn't exactly a lot of time for chat once we reached the FOB," Kaidan remembering back to his final moments alone with Shepard. She'd tried to say goodbye and walk away, but he hadn't let her, instead pulling her in for one last kiss. "No offense, Javik, but you weren't the topic of conversation."

Unphased, Javik continued. "I told Shepard that I would go to the Cronian Nebula, what your people called the Orion Nebula in this cycle, and end my life so that my soul might rest with those of my men."

"That's pretty drastic, Javik," Kaidan said, taken aback.

"Mine has been a life of war and violence, and I have many sins to atone for." Javik's four eyes focused intensely on Kaidan. "I wish now to die a soldier's death. A clean death in battle, as I should have done fifty-thousand years ago with the rest of my people."

"I'm sorry," Kaidan sputtered. "What?"

"Do not be dense, human. I know your hearing is flawless."

"I'm not being dense," Kaidan's annoyance was clear in his voice. "I just don't understand what you're saying."

Liara jumped in before Javik could open his mouth. "Kaidan, Javik has not been happy here. We all know that. Imagine what it must be like to be the very last of your kind in the entire galaxy. To live in a world where no one understands your needs, desires, or motivations."

"You support this, Liara?" Kaidan asked in disbelief.

"I do, but on a condition."

"And what condition is that?" Kaidan asked, leaning back in his chair and crossing his arms across his chest.

Liara blushed and fidgeted under the table. "He must father a child."

"And how is he supposed to do that?" Kaidan asked sarcastically.

"Don't be naïve," she said sharply, the blush gone. "Who else but me?"

Kaidan slowly lowered his hands to his lap as he stared at Liara, his mouth agape. So the rumours had been true. Liara and Javik had some kind of relationship.

"Close your mouth, Kaidan," she chided him. "Is it really so hard to believe?"

"I'm sorry, it's just a lot to take in," Kaidan said shaking his head and turning to Javik. "I have a lot of questions and I'm not really sure where to start. Mostly, I think I'd like to know why you're telling me?"

"I must fight someone to be killed in battle. I had originally planned to ask the turian, but as he is not unavailable, you are my second choice."

"You want to battle to the death?" Kaidan exclaimed causing several people to glance curiously in their direction. "You can't be serious."

"I am perfectly serious," Javik replied soberly.

"And if I die?" Kaidan asked, still not sure if this was reality and not some bizarre dream.

"My aim is to die, not to kill."

"So, you're going to let me win?"

"No. I expect you to fight to the best of your ability and defeat me."

Kaidan pushed his chair back and stood with his palms on the table, leaning in to face Javik. "This is insanity and I'm not playing along."

He spun on his heel and stalked away. He heard another chair scrape against the floor.

"Kaidan, please."

It was the first ever than Javik had ever used his name. Kaidan stopped where he was and lowered his head, staring intently at the metal floor. There were footsteps behind him and Javik appeared at his side.

"This is not an idle or spontaneous request. If you wish, I can show you my memories. Perhaps then you will understand."

"No," Kaidan said immediately. "Shepard told me about the Echo Shard. How it effected you."

"So, you will do this for me?" Javik implored.

"I don't get it. Why me? Why not James?"

"I debated for many nights," Javik said as he paced back and forth in front of Kaidan. Three paces left, three paces right. "I finally decided that the turian would be the most likely to comply. The turian race is more like mine than any others of this cycle. But I had no chance to ask him before he was injured. And now that the James human has offspring, Liara T'soni would not allow me to make this request of him."

Kaidan turned around to face Liara, who stood behind him, patiently waiting. "I know you're pissed at me, Liara, but really, pitting me in a death match?"

"This had nothing to do with how I feel about, which by the way is quite fondly still," she told Kaidan with emotion. "I know you can do this for Javik. I want you to do this for Javik."

Kaidan then glanced around the room and saw several people staring at them, listening intently to their conversation. "Maybe we should take this conversation somewhere more private."

Javik and Liara realized how public their discussion had become and quickly agreed. They made their way outside and stood in the shade behind the hall. Now it was Kaidan's turn to pace. He'd had far too much information thrown at him today. Far too many thoughts to process on too little sleep.

"I'm still seriously confused here. Liara, if you two are together, why do you want him to do this."

"I'm sorry if that's what we've lead you to believe," Liara said, her eyes downcast. "Javik and I are not in the type of relationship you think we are. As an asari, I am simply better able to comprehend him. We have joined consciousnesses several times now and I understand why he wishes to do this."

"You are a powerful biotic," Javik added. "You are more than an equal match for me."

"I haven't used my biotic in months. And the last time I did it gave me a splitting migraine. I'm not sure I'm the same soldier I was. I'm not sure my implant could take it."

"We have considered that complication," Javik said handing Kaidan a datapad from a pocket in his armour-like body suit.

"What is this?" Kaidan scanned down the scrolling information, only half understanding it.

Liara stepped to Kaidan's side. "We would understand if you do not want to go through with this. Doctor Chakwas already knows about it, but until now has respected your choice not to upgrade your implant. This procedure would allow her to replace your implant with an L5x with minimally invasive surgery that could be completed in mere minutes."

This information was astonishing and Kaidan could barely believe it. "According to this I would be awake the whole time. How is this possible?"

"My people were appreciably more advanced than your own in the field of medicine."

"They say necessity is the mother of invention, and when your species has been at war for hundreds of years, being able save live quickly and efficiently is essential," Liara said, taking the datapad back from Kaidan.

After his conversation on the beach with Catherine, Kaidan had determined that if he was ever able to safely remove his implant he would. He had never considered being able to upgrade to an implant with virtually no side effects beyond the scaring of the operation itself.

"Why does Karin even have an L5x here?" Kaidan asked, the questions coming on instinct now, more than reason.

"Apparently, she always hoped you might reconsider and allow for your implant to be replaced," Liara told him. "To be honest, so did I. None of us enjoyed watching you suffer."

"So, if I go through with this," Kaidan asked cautiously. "When would you want to do it?"

"Tomorrow."

Kaidan stared at Javik, watching his eight black pupils dilate and contract as he stared back unblinking.

"And you're planning to go conceive a child tonight, are you?" Kaidan asked incredulously.

Once again, Liara blushed, but this time Javik reached out and put an arm around her shoulder protectively.

"The act has already been done. Liara carries a child that shares my heritage."

For about the third time that day, Kaidan was speechless. It was all just too much to take in. And yet for some reason, he found himself nodding and words coming out of his mouth all on their own.

"Give me until noon to sleep," he said, checking the time on his omnitool. That would give him nearly five hours to rest and maybe find he sanity he seemed to have misplaced. "I'll go Doctor Chakwas in the afternoon."

Without another word or a look back he walked away, turned the corner and marched away like an automaton. Once alone inside his cabin he stripped his clothes off and lay down on the bed and was asleep almost instantly, exhaustion taking over while his over stimulated mind rebelled by simply shutting down.

He was awoken several hours later when his door flew open and someone came storming in. Kaidan blinked against the sudden bright light, but his eyes weren't required to figure out who it was.

"Have you lost your mind?" Catherine shouted at him from the end of the bed, hand on her hips and eyes blazing. "First I find out that you are fighting a death match with Javik and then I hear that in order to not die in that death match you are going to let Doctor Chakwas cut into your brain."

"I was sleeping," he said stupidly.

"I don't care," she yelled back, her voice raising an octave. "This is craziness. You can't do this!"

"Why not?" He sat up and braced his elbows on his bent knees.

Catherine waved a hand in the air as if all the words she'd just shrieked at him were still floating around above them. "Did I mention the word insane?"

"You did," Kaidan replied calmly. "Just wondering what difference it makes to you."

Catherine sputtered and frowned at him, starting several sentences only to abandon them half a word in. "Fine, get yourself killed."

She stormed out of the room, slamming the door behind her. Kaidan had played with her just now and he knew it, but it was nice to know she really did care to that extent still. Feeling only mildly rested he leaned back against the wall and considered everything he, Liara and Javik had talked about.

As he did, he began to understand. Not fully, but enough that he knew that he would be helping Javik, not hurting him. Neither Javik nor Liara were ones to make rash decisions. They each were logical beings who focused on facts and made choices based on them.

Despite what they thought, Kaidan did understand the need soldiers had to die in combat. He and Shepard had discussed the very same topic during one melancholy night of brooding reflection.

Shepard had been a soldier her entire life, following in her parents footsteps. She had been raised on the belief that sacrifice for your people was the greatest honour, and she had believed in it whole heartedly. Although Kaidan came from a military family as well, the same ideals had never been instilled in him, at least not to such a degree, and the choice to join the Alliance had come much later in life.

Kaidan would gladly have given his life to see the Reapers destroyed, and very nearly had, but when it came right down to it, it wasn't how he wanted to go. He'd always held out hope that one day he would find someone, settle down and start a family. He loved kids and wanted to be around to see them grow up.

Deep down, he'd always known that he and Shepard had been star-crossed. Whatever had happened on the Citadel at the end, Kaidan knew Shepard had acted without a second thought. He didn't doubt that she had spared a thought for him, but it would never would have stopped her. She knew her duty and she never faltered. It was part of why he loved and admired so much.

Javik was not prepared for a life that allowed him to grow old. He didn't know how to settle down and look at the future as a boon and not a battle. If Kaidan did this for him, it would be a mercy. But first he had to face his own demons. It was time to find Doctor Chakwas.

Kaidan found the doctor in with medical suite with Garrus who was sitting up and attempting to eat. Tali was feeding him carefully, though Kaidan could tell the turian wasn't convinced being spoon fed was necessary.

"You look good, Garrus," Kaidan said, leaning on the side of the bed opposite Tali. "Feeling up to fighting Javik in a battle to the death?"

Garrus tried to laugh, but it turned into a cough which Doctor Chakwas aborted with a mask over his mouth.

"No laughing, Garrus," she scolded. "I do not relish the idea of stitching up that mess of scar tissue again."

"Yes, ma'am," he said meekly then turned back to Kaidan. "I heard about that. You really going to go through with it?"

"Of course he is," Tali quipped.

"Didn't expect you to be on his side," Kaidan said with surprise.

"Liara is my best friend. Keelah, did you really think I wouldn't know she's pregnant? I've had months to get used to the idea."

"Then why tomorrow?" Kaidan asked. "What's the hurry?"

"Tomorrow is the anniversary of the death of his men," Tali explained. "Give or take a few days. EDI had difficulty calculating the precise date given how long ago it happened."

"Did everyone know about this but me?" Kaidan stood up and began to pace, suddenly doubting his decision.

"No. EDI, Karin and I were the only ones who knew," Tali said.

Kaidan turned to the doctor and asked, "And you can really do this surgery as easily as Liara and Javik think you can?"

"It's the most minimally invasive method I have ever seen in my life. It's ingenious really. I can explain it if you'd like."

Kaidan waved her off. "No, I trust you,"

It was like a carrot on a stick. He could spend the rest of his life able to use his biotics consequence free, but in order to do that he had to kill a friend. He's always been on the pro-choice side of the assisted suicide and A.N.D debate, but was this really the same thing? Javik wasn't suffering from a debilitating or fatal illness. He hadn't aged to the point where death would be preferable to prolonged life.

Kaidan had thought he'd had this figured out, but now all this doubt was cropping up. He looked at Garrus and hoped that his friend could help him understand.

"Would a turian want this?"

"I've never been a very good turian," Garrus retorted.

"Okay, would a good turian want this? Can you understand why Javik would choose this over life?"

Garrus sighed and looked passed Kaidan at the wall, his eyes going vacant as he reflected on something.

"All my grandfather ever wanted was to die a soldier," Garrus said. "He fought in every battle the turians found themselves embroiled in. As the years went on and he got closer to the age of forced retirement, he came back from each battle grumpier and meaner. When he finally died of simple old age, it felt more like a defeat than if he had been killed in battle with posthumous honours. So, yeah. I get it."

It made a strange sort of sense. Kaidan understood, but at the same time could not fathom feeling that way about his own life. Every time he survived any brush with death it felt like a victory and every breath he drew after that felt like a gift.

"Karin, how long will this upgrade take?"

"Not long. Perhaps half an hour."

"Let's do it. Now. Before I change my mind."

In the end the surgery took only twenty minutes. Kaidan felt no pain at all as the old implant was drawn out, despite it having been in place for more than half his life, but the difference was instantly noticeable.

Kaidan had been living with a low grade headache for nearly two decades and grown so used to it that when it was finally gone it was like coming up for air. His head felt clearer, his vision sharper, and the mild tinnitus he'd always suffered vanished completely.

Doctor Chakwas had him test his abilities immediately. Kaidan had been a formidable biotic to begin with, rivalling the power and skill of an asari commando, but now he guessed he was on par with the level of strength in an asari matriarch.

Outside in the field to the east of the houses, Kaidan lifted and threw a log crashing into a stone cliff face to the north with barely a flick of his arm. There was no pain, no pressure, and no waning of his strength.

It was hard not to be ecstatic about the results. Kaidan had to keep reminding himself why he had undergone this procedure. He'd thought his soldiering days were over. He'd thought his days of killing and aggression were behind him. But tomorrow he would be using these amplified abilities to end a life, and he still wasn't sure he could go through with it.