Kaidan had four sets of armor, and he sat on the couch in his cabin with Liara trying to decide which of them to wear.
The chest plate of each was propped up against the bed across from him; His regulation Alliance blues, relatively unscuffed, his mottled grey light armor, more like camo gear, his heavy blue armor covered in scorch marks and bullet impacts, and the silver Major's issue armor he'd almost never worn.
"I think you should wear the heavy armor," Liara said from her end of the couch. "With your new implant, you should be able to use your biotics to their full potential regardless of the additional weight."
"Liara, explain something to me," Kaidan said, turning away from the chest plates and looking at the asari.
"What would you like me to explain?" Liara asked, pulling her feet up underneath her, looking petite and vulnerable.
"Why are you doing this? If you don't love Javik, why are you having a baby?"
Liara gave a silvery laugh that fooled Kaidan none. He could hear the sadness beneath it.
"I never said I don't love Javik," she told him as her eyes filled with tears. "I only said that we do not have the type of relationship you believed."
"Help me understand here, Liara."
"Javik was raised in a time when relationships were forbidden," Liara said wistfully. "Children were born as a result of carefully prepared breeding programs."
"Why were relationships forbidden?"
"People are a lot less likely to sacrifice themselves for the greater good when they have something to live for," Liara sad with a sad smile. "So while I have become quite attached to Javik, there is little more that he is capable of giving me."
Kaidan realized then that the entire situation was far more complicated than he had at first realized. So much had gone on while he and Liara were barely on speaking terms and he felt like he had missed a very important chapter in her life.
"I'm sorry, Liara," he told her with genuine regret. "This must be so hard for you."
"Javik is able to share memory and emotions with me in ways that other species cannot," she explained. "Not even the asari can probe as deeply into another consciousness as Javik can. I know he has given me the best of himself."
Kaidan remembered the way Javik had placed his arm around Liara's shoulder when he revealed her pregnancy. He had seemed very much the proud and protective father.
"Why didn't you tell me this yesterday?"
"Javik carries enough weight on his shoulders without knowing the depth of my feelings for him." Liara rested her head on the arm of the couch and wrapped her arms around her knees, curling into a ball and looking even more childlike. "I convinced him to father a child because I am selfish and I want a piece of him to live on."
"Does he realize that any child you have is going to be asari no matter what?"
"Our child will have the physiology of an asari, but many have come to believe that our daughters carry more of their fathers in them than we ever thought," Liara said. "My mother always told me that I reminded her very much of my father, Matriarch Aethyta. Physical traits may not translate, but I believe personality quirks do."
Kaidan had heard many of these theories working with the men and women of his SpecOps Biotic Company. Since the first human with innate biotic ability was born, many people had wondered if the offspring of a human biotic and an asari would produce an even more powerful biotic. Though these discussion has usually begun intelligently enough, they'd often quickly degraded into vulgar silliness, but Kaidan wondered now at their validity.
"Are you sure you want me to do this?"
"Of course I'm not sure." She leapt up from her seat and leaned her head against the opposite wall, her back to Kaidan. When she spoke, her voice was barely audible. "I am only just over one hundred years old. A child in eyes of many. Yet I have lost so many people over the years. My mother, Feron, Shepard, and every other asari I have ever known. Letting Javik go is the hardest of them yet. Knowing that we could have a future together, raise our children together. But I know without a shadow of a doubt that Javik would never be truly happy. Please, don't ask me to analyze this any more than I already have."
Kaidan stood and crossed the floor to her. He sat on the end of the bed and pulled her down beside him. No words were necessary. His actions spoke loudly enough and he simply held her close as she composed herself.
Eventually, she pulled away, dabbing at her eyes with the cuff of her shirt. She walked around to the side of the bed and picked up a chest plate and handed it to him.
"I changed my mind. Wear Alliance blue. Javik will appreciate the military symbols."
She passed him his body suit next and turned her back while he pulled it on. It was a little tight across the shoulders, but it still fit. Liara helped him with the last few inches of zipper at his back and then handed him his armor piece by piece.
A heavier, looser fitting body suit went over the first. The chest plate clipped firmly into place attaching to the back under the arms and at his waist, covering his torso right down to his groin. Shoulder guards and gauntlets slid into sockets on the arms of the body suit, while the greaves clipped into place over his armored boots. More plating went on over his thighs and hips, and the suit was completed with metallic-knuckled gloves.
Kaidan flexed and stretched, trying to get used to the added weight of his armor again.
"Hard to believe I use to wear this day in and day out," he said trying to smile at Liara. "Shouldn't you go see Javik?"
"Javik and I have already said our goodbyes," Liara said, licking her finger and rubbing at a line of charring on Kaidan's chest plate. "Seeing each other now will only make this harder."
"I'm taking a big risk here, Liara," Kaidan said as he picked up his helmet, debating whether or not to wear it. "Accidents can happen when guys are just messing around."
"Javik has no intention of killing you. It will be self defense only on his part and your task will be to get around it."
"I feel much better," Kaidan snorted. "What are the rules of this anyway?"
"Javik will explain everything when we arrive. Are you ready, Kaidan?"
He shrugged once more, letting this gear settle into place, feeling at home in his armor. With nod to Liara, he headed for the door and out into the bright morning light.
A crowd had gathered in the field already. The fire pit had been covered over and the logs rolled well out of the way. The atmosphere was withdrawn and anxious and Javik stood alone in the centre of the space facing the rising sun, hands clasped behind his back and eyes closed in silent contemplation, or maybe even prayer.
Kaidan approached him and waited patiently to be acknowledged. At last, Javik opened his eyes and turned to face him.
"Good morning, Major," he said gravely. "Are you ready to do battle."
"I guess so, yeah. Some ground rules first might be good though."
Javik nodded, looking around at the crowd. "I have told everyone that they may watch, but only from a distance. They must not get in our way or behave distractingly. For their safety, as well as yours, we will be fighting hand to hand with only our bodies and biotics."
"Does anyone else know why this is happening?" Kaidan asked, thinking of Catherine and her vehement objections the previous day.
"They are all of the military," Javik said. "They may not agree, but I believe they understand."
Maybe not everyone, Kaidan thought as he scanned the crowd looking for Catherine not seeing her. He decided he was okay with that and wished more people had avoided the spectacle. As it was there were about twenty-five people standing around waiting, including James and Tali.
"Major, I have some final words if you will listen," Javik said, his level gaze looking past Kaidan to where Liara stood by herself away from the crowd. "Take care of Liara. She is brave and understanding, but I do not believe she aware of the depth of her attachment to me."
Kaidan struggled for moment, debating whether or not to share any of his conversation with Liara.
"I think Liara is aware of a lot more than you know," was all he said.
"I am ready to begin." Javik held his hand out and Kaidan grasped it firmly.
The crowd seemed to realize what was about the happen and took a step back from the combatants.
"Shall we begin at ten paces?"
He nodded and Javik turned to begin counting out the strides, but Kaidan called him back. Javik turned, his head held high.
"I just wanted to say it's been an honour knowing you and serving with you. Not many people can say they fought side by side with a prothean."
"The honour has been mine, human. I knew your species had potential. I am glad you have survived the Reapers."
They turned and stood back to back for a beat before each striding away. Kaidan mouthed the numbers with each footfall, trying to prepare himself for what he was about to do. On ten he spun and aimed his omnitool at Javik, overloading his shield in one blast. The prothean's frame shook with the electric jolt of it for a moment before he recovered and barely threw himself out of the way of a biotic stasis field that would have frozen him long enough for Kaidan to step in and press the attack.
Taking advantage of Javik's unbalance, Kaidan barreled towards him, his legs pumping furiously, and threw himself at the alien's legs. Before he could land, Javik's emerald green biotic field wrapped around him and sent Kaidan spinning across the grass. He rolled to a halt and came up on his feet, eyes searching for his opponent.
Javik had not moved and stood at the ready roughly twenty paces from Kaidan. Realizing he would need to get in close or else Javik would continue to throw him back, Kaidan unleashed a massive barrier in front of himself, pushing it along with great effort as he ran at Javik again.
At the last second he dropped the barrier, slid along the ground and sent Javik flying upward with a biotic push. His arms flailed in the air as he fell, and when he landed, Kaidan was on top of him. They grappled with each other, each fighting for the upper hand, neither quite getting it before the other delivered a bone crushing blow.
Javik surprised Kaidan with a sharp strike to the temple and he fell back stunned, feeling warm, sticky blood soaking into the collar of his body suit. Shaking it off he kicked up at the prothean just as he'd gained his feet and sent him sprawling back on the dusty, sun baked ground.
Sweat and blood dripped in the Kaidan's eyes, blinding him. He wiped it away with the cuff of his glove. It had been a long time since Kaidan had sparred one on one with someone, and Javik was formidably strong, never mind his powerful biotics. He guessed that this battle would be one of attrition, wearing away at each other until one of them finally gave in. Kaidan wondered what Javik would do if his endurance was greater.
Kaidan threw another stasis field, but Javik blocked it with a barrier and got to his feet as Kaidan regained his own. They face one another, each panting slightly, and Kaidan realized that brute force was not going to get him anywhere. He had to manipulate the battle to favour him.
Launching a series of shockwaves at Javik to wear down his shields, Kaidan attempted something he has never been able to even comprehend doing before. He'd seen asari do it enough times and he understood the concept. He gathered his energy inwards and lifted himself off the ground with his biotics, throwing himself at Javik as the tail end of the shockwaves destroyed his barrier completely.
There was no finesse to the action. It was not the smooth, graceful movement he'd seen the Justicar Samara execute on Lesuss, but it did the job.
Kaidan slammed into Javik's torso, his cheek scraping painfully across the prothean's armor. Javik attempted to use Kaidan's momentum against him and send him over on his back, but Kaidan drilled his elbow into the prothean's side, denting the ancient armor and forcing a cry from his mouth.
Ignoring the sound, Kaidan let adrenaline fuel him and grabbed Javik's wrist and tried to flip him over and pin him to the ground. The alien twisted, bucking wildly and Kaidan lost his grip as Javik took hold of his armor and slammed him into the ground. His teeth rattled with the force of the impact and he lashed out with a violent biotic kick, catching Javik in the knee.
Javik crashed to the ground and Kaidan backhanded his fist into the alien's jaw, rolling onto his knees as he did. Spitting blood, Javik thrust his leg out at Kaidan, but only managed to hit him in the heavy plating protecting his thigh. The blow was jarring, but didn't slow Kaidan as he locked Javik in a stasis field.
On his hand and knees, Javik could only stare down at the swirls of dust that eddied about his splayed fingers. Kaidan could have finished him off right then, warped his insides to shreds or pulled him apart with a singularity, but instead he pushed himself to his feet and waited.
The moment the stasis lifted mere seconds later, Javik spun into action, trying to leap away from Kaidan. But Kaidan was ready and as soon as Javik moved his arm shot out and his fingers wrapped around the alien's wrist. He twisted up and back, slamming the heel of his boot into the back of Javik's knee as he did, forcing him to the ground.
Kaidan landed on top of Javik, trapping his legs with his own and pinning the prothean's arms behind his back. Focusing intensely, he held Javik in another stasis lock and took the alien's head in his hands, reaching around to his chin and the other gripped tightly around the peak of his head crest. Javik was at his mercy.
It had all happened so fast. Kaidan had expected the battle to last hours, and he wondered if Javik had let himself lose. This was it. The eleventh hour. Kaidan held Javik's life in his hands and he would do nothing with it without one last confirmation.
"Are you sure?" Kaidan said softly in the prothean's ear.
"Yes," Javik replied, his voice strong and certain. Kaidan saw his eyes search out Liara and he gave one last deep sigh before he said, "You are an honourable man, Kaidan Alenko. Do it now."
Kaidan didn't hesitate. If he had, he never would have been able to do it. He let out a gruff yell as he twisted sharply to the right with all his strength. There was a crackling sound and the prothean went limp in his arms, breath escaping his mouth, his eyes giving one final flicker before he crumpled to the ground.
Shifting his legs off of the dead prothean, Kaidan grasped the alien's shoulders and rolled him over. He looked down into Javik's still face and began to panic. Had he really just done this? Ended a life with his bare hands?
Disgusted and enraged, Kaidan yanked at his gloves, throwing them on the ground. Standing, he ripped off his gauntlets and pauldrons and cast them away. His chest plate had barely clattered to the ground before he was bending over to tear away his greaves, and thigh guards.
His stood panting in the hot sun, wishing he could continue to strip away the layers, shed everything until there was nothing left but the man he wanted to be. A man who didn't kill on command, who didn't have the strength or ability to create the scene of extermination that lay before him.
"Every scrap of armor in this place goes with Javik to his grave," he yelled, collapsing to his knees and holding his head in his hands. Fury rose in his chest and he wanted to lash out at Liara, at Tali, at Garrus, at everyone who had convinced him that this was a good idea.
But there was no one to blame but himself. No one had put a gun to his head and forced him into this battle. He had reasoned and debated and come to the conclusion that this was the right thing to do.
And then Liara was at his side, one arm around his shaking shoulders and the other reaching down to clutch desperately at Javik's still hand.
"I am so sorry, Liara," Kaidan croaked past the growing lump in his throat. "Don't ever forgive me for this. This is unforgivable."
"This is what he wanted, Kaidan," her voice shook and she sniffed softly. Letting go of Kaidan she leaned over and placed her lips on Javik's, lingering for a long moment as tears spilled down her cheeks and splashed onto his. "May you find peace in the embrace of the Goddess," she whispered to Javik and then turned to Kaidan, her eyes as black as onyx. "Both of you."
A wave of euphoria washed over Kaidan and he fell back, slumping to the ground and staring up at the deep blue of the sky as his limbs went numb. All the aches and pains dulled and he felt a great, comfortable weight settle into him, as if he was falling into warm waters.
The last thing he saw as his eye lost focus was Liara's face above his and her hand coming down to brush the blood soaked hair from his brow.
Something cool and damp touched his cheek, and soothing, feminine voices seemed to be all around him. Kaidan wanted to open his eyes, but they felt thick and heavy. Where ever he was felt soft and warm and dark.
As he slowly woke, the voices became more distinct. One was Catherine, seemingly standing right above him. He could hear Morgan, whose voice was moving back and forth at the foot the bed. What he'd thought was a third voice was really the quiet mewling of a baby.
Carefully, his stiff muscles protesting, he moved his arm and tried to lift it above the blankets to rub at his eyes. Then suddenly the weight on his face was gone and he blinked at the bright light.
He was in his own bed, sunlight streaming in his open window. A cloth had been draped over his eyes, blocking out the light so he could sleep.
Memories came flooding back to him. The fight, Javik's death, Liara's black eyes. After that there was nothing. No dreams, not even sensations to give him a clue as to what had happened after.
"Sit up if you can, Kaidan," Catherine was saying as she wrung out the cloth that had been over his eyes. He blinked up at her, trying to bring her face into focus.
"How did I get here?"
Morgan appeared beside Catherine, holding little Lola in her arms and rocking her gently. "James carried you. Cat and I stayed with you."
"Where's Liara?" Kaidan desperately needed to know that she was all right.
Catherine lowered her voice, her eyes filled with grief as they met his. "She's with Javik. Hasn't left his side since yesterday. Steve and some others are building a pyre up near the ship. They wanted to wait for you, but I said they should start."
Kaidan pushed himself up until he was sitting against the pillow. The blanket fell down his chest and he realized he was naked.
"I undressed you," Morgan said when she saw him pulling the sheet a little higher. "The body suits are with the rest of your armor."
"Thanks," he mumbled. He cheek throbbed and he touched it gingerly, feeling the raw abrasion there. "Why did I pass out?"
"Liara overwhelmed your consciousness," Catherine explained. "She said it was a gift. That you deserved a rest."
"And I've been out since yesterday?"
Catherine nodded, handing him a bowl of stir-fried meat and vegetables. "You should eat something."
"I'm not hungry," he said pushing the bowl away. But Catherine was insistent and as he began to pick at the contents he realize he was famished.
Lola started to wail and the piercing sound was almost more than Kaidan's aching head could handle. When humming didn't pacify her, Morgan made her exit leaving Catherine and Kaidan alone.
When Kaidan was done eating Catherine took the bowl and set it on the couch, pulling her three-legged stool closer to the bed.
"I'm sorry I yelled at you," she said looking down at her feet. "I still think what you did was crazy, but you needed support, not a screeching harridan."
"It's okay, Cat," he paused, but only so he could find the exact right words. "Your loudly expressed opinions were justified. My behaviour, however... I owe you more than one apology."
She looked up and shushed him with a wave of her hand. "No, you don't have to do this. It's not the time."
"Yeah," he said, sitting up further and sliding down the bed so he could swing his legs over the side and face her. "Yeah, it is the time. I've put this off for way too long. I was afraid to face you. I was embarrassed and ashamed. Now, I'm afraid it might be too late. That I might have lost you."
There were tears in her eyes when she looked up at him. "You'll never lose me. But I'll understand if you don't want me."
"Not want you?" Kaidan put a hand on her cheek and she leaned into it, reaching up to hold his wrist and then pulling away. "I've wanted nothing but you since that night in the rain."
"But why? There's nothing special about me. Not compared to Shepard."
Kaidan took her by the chin and forced her to look him in the eyes. "Everything I loved about Shepard is in you. Courage, tenacity, kindness, compassion. Did you think I loved her because she could take out a husk with a head shot from three thousand meters? I loved her because in spite of everything, Elysium, Eden Prime, Ilos, Horizon, Cerberus, Mars, she still held those qualities in her. She didn't let everything she'd seen turn her into something else."
Catherine tried to look away, but Kaidan didn't let her. "Don't try to tell me you haven't seen anything like what she saw. You were there on Earth when the Reapers attacked, and saw your world crumble apart just like everyone else. You saw Palaven and Thessia fall. You're here now and have carried us through this as much, if not more, than anyone else. I love you, Catherine Hogan, and don't let my terrible attitude convince you otherwise."
Catherine all but leapt at him. She threw her arms around him neck and clung to him, her body shaking with sobs. Her leg had pulled the blanket off his lap and he reached for it with one hand, trying to keep himself decent, while wrapping his other arm around her back.
"Hey, Cat," he murmured. "Don't cry."
"I'm sorry," she wailed. "I can't stop. I've held everything in for so long."
Her words were punctuated with little hiccups and Kaidan could feel her tears falling on his neck. She'd been on the same emotional roller coaster he had. The pain and confusion of their separation, worry for Garrus, worry for him as he fought Javik, and now worry for Liara.
Forgetting the blanket he put both arms around her and just let the sobs continue. He lifted her from the stool and onto his lap. The rough material of her pants chaffed at his leg, but he ignored it.
The tears eventually stopped, and Catherine raised her head to look at him. Her blue eyes were swollen and puffy, her lashes all clumped together. Several ringlets had fallen loose from the clip that held her hair back and they bounced as she lowered her head to wipe her cheeks with the back of her hand.
Her entire face, ears and all, went red when she realized what she was looking at.
"You're naked," she said, trying not to look down again.
"You may be right," Kaidan said as he lifted her up off his lap and pulled the blanket back over himself. "The second drawer from the left, if you wouldn't mind."
Still blushing furiously, Catherine went to the wall of storage beside the couch and took out a pair of black boxers. Keeping her back turned, she tossed them to Kaidan and he pulled them on.
Part of Kaidan wanted nothing more than to pick up where they'd left off, but his better judgment prevailed and he joined Catherine at the lockers. He had one pair of jeans left and he into them, grabbing a plain white t-shirt to go with.
"I'm glad I bought so much clothing on the Citadel," he commented lightly. "I'm also glad I brought aboard everything form my apartment on the Persidium."
He was making small talk and he knew it, but Catherine wasn't saying anything and he felt a need to fill the silence. There were no denying he was avoiding the most important topic.
"Kaidan, I'm sorry to bring this up, but you sort of need to give an answer before tonight," Catherine said, taking his hands in hers. "Liara wanted me to ask you if you really want to destroy your armor."
"Yeah, I do," he sighed heavily. "There are no soldiers here now. We don't need it and I don't want to see it again."
"Okay," Catherine nodded. "I thought that's what you would say. James brought it all up to the pyre already."
"Is Liara okay?" It was as stupid question, but Kaidan didn't know how else to ask after her.
"She seems," Catherine took a deep breath and let it out quickly. "Peaceful."
"I still can't believe it all really happened," Kaidan said, sitting back down on the edge of the bed.
Catherine sat beside him and held his hand in her lap, running her thumb back and forth across his palm. "It was a pretty spectacular fight, and I didn't know Javik very well, but I know enough to be sure he wanted to go that way."
"You watched?" Kaidan looked down at her in surprise.
"Not the whole thing," she replied. "I didn't want to, but I was scared for you. I got there in time to see you flying at him. Actually flying."
"I'm scared to ask, but how bad is my face?"
"You're gorgeous," Catherine said shyly.
Kaidan hugged her to him and then stood and opened a locker door to look in the mirror inside. There was a deep gash on his left temple held closed by a generous smear of liquid bandage. His left cheek was a mass of long, thin red lines only just beginning to scab over. Beneath his eyes was bruised and purple and one earlobe was ripped and stung painfully when he touched it.
"Not too bad all things considered," he said looking back over his shoulder at Catherine. "Javik was seriously strong."
"You seem to be dealing with this rather well," Catherine said.
"I don't know. Maybe I'm still in shock, but I keep reminding myself that what I did... It wasn't necessarily a bad thing. Javik was a complicated man with an even more complicated past. If Liara could accept that this was the right thing to do, then who am I to argue."
Catherine stood and put her arms around his waist and leaned her head on his back. "Well, there are a few people who don't really understand what happened yesterday, but I think it would help if you spoke at his funeral."
Kaidan turned in her arm and bent his head down to press his lips to hers. The kiss grew passionately until she pulled away, bracing her palms against his chest.
"If you keep kissing me like that things are going to go a lot further and it just doesn't seem appropriate."
He chuckled. "Hard to believe this is only the third time I've kissed you. Feels so familiar."
Question flared in her eyes and he realized he'd slipped up. Now wasn't the time to delve into the past and he quickly ate his words. "We've tried the couch and the bed. Maybe the desk is next."
He smiled at her and he saw the panic fade, and relief loosened the knot in his own stomach. He didn't think either of them was ready for him to reveal his memory from twenty-one years earlier.
There was a knock at the door then and Kaidan called for whoever it was to come in. James entered and quickly took in the situation.
"Glad that's over," he said winked at Cat. "Morgan was really starting to bug me constantly complaining about you two."
"What's up, James?" Kaidan asked, choosing not to indulge the man's curiosity regarding Catherine.
"Pretty much everyone has already hiked up to the ship. Esteban's taking people up in the shuttle who can't hike the whole distance. Just wanted to know if you want a lift."
Still feeling incredibly sore, Kaidan said yes and Catherine said the same. The three of them walked up the path to the landing area.
"I already loaded all your armor in," James told Kaidan. "It's up there. So's mine."
Kaidan patted him on the back. "Our fighting days are over, my friend."
"Never thought I'd feel this way, but I can't say I'll miss them," James said. "Havin' a kid really changes stuff."
"I bet it does," Kaidan said with a glance at Catherine, wondering if she was thinking the same thing he was. They had a lot of things to talk about.
At the shuttle they found Morgan, with Lola in her arms, Karin, Tali, and a very slow moving Garrus. Kaidan was surprised to see him up and about so soon, but guessed that it was only being allowed due to the unusual circumstances.
What was at least an hours walk on foot, took the shuttle only a few minutes. Kaidan hadn't been to the ship in months and he was shocked by what he found. She was a skeleton. Most of the outer hull had been stripped away to be used as roofing, and the beams and girders that remained had already started to rust. Nothing remained of the bridge, and it was possible to see right through her in some places. The Normandy was barely recognizable as the huge and powerful ship she'd once been.
A towering pile of wood had been built up like a log cabin just below the rocks that had lead up to the airlock and people were still adding to it. Kaidan could see his armor at the base, right beside James' and Garrus'. The only other crew member who'd had any armor was Liara, but hers didn't appear to be in the pile and she was conspicuously absent as well.
"Where's Liara?" Kaidan asked Steve as they stepped from the shuttle.
"I'm going back for her in a bit," Steve said, then added. "And for the body."
Kaidan couldn't tell from his voice how Steve felt about the whole situation. He suspected the widower was one of the few who really understood the need for an end. Steve been there himself at one point. Lucky for him he'd had Shepard to guide him out of it.
"Never thought I'd be flying a hearse one day," Cortez said, giving the Kodiak an affectionate pat.
"Hopefully never again," Kaidan said with a sad smile.
The two crew members who'd died early on had been buried in the rubble around the ship. Heavy slabs of rock had been bioticly lowered into place over the graves and their names etched in the buff coloured stone. It had seemed appropriate to lay them to rest there.
Now another would be joining them, his ashes lifted by the warm autumn winds and scattered through the stout, twisted trees.
As Kaidan and Catherine walked hand in hand toward the pyre, people greeted them, smiling at Kaidan, patting him on the back and offering consoling words. Everyone seemed to be trying extra hard to make sure he knew they held nothing against him.
The sun was sinking away quickly, the days getting shorter as winter approached, but the air was still balmy and dry. Kaidan and Catherine found a place to sit out of the sun with Gabby and Kenneth. Gabby was just starting to show her pregnancy and Kenneth couldn't keep his hands away from her belly no matter how many times she slapped him away.
If they had any thoughts about Catherine and Kaidan's renewed closeness they didn't say it, but Gabby and Cat exchanged knowing smiles as they sat down.
The mood was strange around the funeral pyre. Some people were solemn and quiet, while others were laughing and happily chatting. Very few had known Javik, and though everyone knew and loved Liara, it was hard for them to feel the same depth of emotion for the prothean.
But when Cortez lifted off in the shuttle, the disposition of the crowd shifted. The last few bundles of dry grasses and twigs was added to the base of the pyre and people began to gather on the far side facing the skeletal ship.
Kaidan rose with the others, but told them he would join them later. Tali left Garrus under EDI's watchful eye and they waited near the edge of the clearing for the shuttle to return. Joker and James seemed to realized what they were about and left the crowd to stand with them.
When the shuttle came into sight they lined up facing each other and Cortez landed the Kodiak right beside them. The door slid open and Liara appeared, taking everyone's breath away.
She was dressed in a gauzy silver gown that seemed to cover everything and nothing at once. It fell in pleats to the floor and was laced up the front with pale yellow ribbons. Her figure could bee seen through the fabric and when she stepped down from the shuttle they saw her feet were bare.
The first thing she did was look at Kaidan with her soulful blue eyes and smile. Kaidan tried to smile back, but couldn't bring his lips to obey. Seeing Liara looking so elegant, he wished he put on his dress uniform and then remembered it had been all but ruined the night he wrestled with James.
Without a word, Liara walked serenely to the pyre while Kaidan, James, Tali and Joker went into the shuttle to lift the wooden litter carrying Javik.
His armor had been cleaned and polished to a high shine. It's red surface and gold piping glinting in the light of the falling sun. His face was tranquil and untroubled, free of the scowl they were all so used to seeing.
They each crouched down and took a corner of the litter, lifting is carefully down from the shuttle. Steve followed close behind, bringing with him a small crate which he placed at Liara's feet before retreating to stand with Avery.
No one spoke as the four carried Javik's body to Liara and set him gently on the ground before her. Nothing had been planned and yet to Kaidan it all felt rehearsed.
Liara bent down and placed her hand on the top of Javik's head, her eyes dry and voice steady as she said something Kaidan was not able to understand. He realized that she was speaking in prothean, and it sounded like a poem or a prayer.
Finally she stood and faced the crowd, turning her back on her dead lover.
"Thank you all for being here." Her voice carried across the clearing and echoed against the trees. "I know you must all be confused by what happened yesterday, but please know that this is what Javik wanted. Kaidan did him a great service and I am glad to know that you are being kind to him. This has been very hard."
She stopped almost abruptly and a blue glow surrounded her as she called on her biotics. The litter began to rise, floating all the way up the side of the pyre and settling on the top. Liara looked back at the crowd.
"Javik was not an easy person to like, but if anyone wishes to say anything, I would welcome it."
Kaidan saw Catherine on the edge of the crowd and caught her eye. She nodded once and he was about to step forward, but Joker beat him to it.
Joker took off his hat as he looked up at the prothean atop of the pile of wood.
"I thought Javik was going to kill me every time I opened my mouth."
Kaidan wrinkled his brow and shared a quizzical look with EDI, wondering where Joker was going with this.
"I avoided him like the plague. But last week, when I called him Prothy the Prothean... again, he didn't threaten to beat me with my own fist. So, maybe he didn't hate me so much after all. Which is good, cause I acutally liked the guy."
He hugged Liara and took a step back to stand beside Tali, tugging his hat back on. Kaidan thought he saw him wipe away a tear, but he couldn't be sure.
No one else stepped forward and before things began to feel uncomfortable Kaidan jumped up on the rock pile beside the ship. All eyes followed him while he climbed until he stood level with the top of the pyre three meters above the ground.
"Javik was the last of his kind," Kaidan raised his voice so that everyone could hear him. "When I fought him yesterday I spent the whole time debating whether or not what I was doing was right. It was. His only goal in life had been to find a way to destroy the Reapers and we did it. Javik once told Shepard that he was an avatar of his time. An avatar of vengeance. He was raised to feel hatred and anger. To kill without mercy and look to the end to justify the means. He awoke to galaxy that had not yet learned to think in those terms. And if any of us are feeling stranded, alone, or unhappy, imagine how he felt. No one ever taught him what to do when the job was done. He was out of place from day one, and yet he did everything in his power to understand us and live by our morals and beliefs. I know that he thought we were worth saving, and I for one will do everything I can to live up to his memory."
Kaidan raised his fist in the air and then stood to attention and gave the prothean and sharp salute. Every member of the crowd did the same, crying out Javik's name as they did.
Climbing down from the rocks, Kaidan joined Catherine and she put her arms around him and they embraced as they watched Liara bend down and open the crate Cortez had brought.
In it was Liara's armor. One suit of a red and grey and another of white and blue. She lay each bundle against the pyre as the sun slipped below the horizon. From the bottom of the crate she pulled a silver square that Kaidan's recognized as James' favourite cigar lighter.
As the darkness grew, Liara went from corner to corner lighting the dry wood on fire. The evening breeze pulled at the flames sending them licking and curling. When all four corners were burning brightly she stepped back and stood with her hand clasped before her.
Moving slowly and carefully, Garrus limped away from the inferno carrying his sniper rifle. He stopped half way to the shuttle and turned, aiming into the air above the pyre.
His first shot cause a flock of birds to burst from the tree tops and fly madly about before flitting off into the darkness. He fired the rifle twelve more times, finishing off the thermal clip, and then rested the butt on the ground and gave a turian salute.
The crowd stayed for some time, watching the flames consume the wood and in turn Javik's body. When the tower began to collapse, people began to disperse, making their down the path and back to the settlement.
Catherine shivered in the cool evening air and Kaidan told her to go back with Morgan and Garrus in the shuttle.
"Are you sure? I don't mind waiting and walking back with you."
Kaidan kissed her, closing his eyes and breathing her in. He hugged her tightly and gave her a little push towards the shuttle.
"Go. I'm going to wait with Liara and make sure she gets home safely."
He watched the shuttle take off and waited until the bulk of the crowd had left the clearing before he approached Liara. Neither of them said anything. They stood there in the darkness for hours as the pyre collapsed in on itself and burned down to glowing embers.
Those who had built it had clearly added something to the centre because there was nothing left of Javik or his armor. Wood alone didn't burn hot enough to destroy metal and bones.
The sky to the east was beginning to lighten when Liara finally turned to Kaidan and said, "Let's go home."
Halfway back Kaidan picked her up and in her exhaustion she fell asleep in his arms and didn't wake even when he lay her in her own bed and pulled the blankets up over her.
Back in his cabin, Kaidan found Catherine asleep on his bed, still clothed and atop the covers, clearly having fallen asleep waiting for him to get back. Grabbing a spare blanket he lay down beside her and pulled it over both of them. She snuggle into him and Kaidan closed his eyes, sleeping at last.