Six Years Later

(Roughly 10 years by Earth Calendar)

"Try it again, Janey," Kaidan called across the water to Jane where she bobbed beside her brother. "You almost had it that time."

"But Dad, it's really hard," she whined back at him. "Why do I have to know how to do this anyway?"

Kaidan sighed and turned to Catherine, where she lay beside him on the beach of the small lake.

"Don't look at me, love," she said without opening her eyes. "This was your idea."

"I'm coming, Jane," Kaidan said, getting to his feet and wading into the water past his three youngest children.

To make things less confusing for all the youth in the settlement, the adults calculated time by the local calendar, but to Kaidan's eyes Rowan, his youngest son looked more like a five year old than a three year old. And he looked drastically younger than his older sister, Millicent, who was just over five by the new calendar, especially sitting beside her in the water that was half way up his chest and only at her waist.

Nora, always caught in the middle between the youngsters and the twins at the slightly more mature, but still childish six, often kept to herself, but today she was building a mountain of rocks in the shallows with her younger siblings.

Kaidan gave her a wink as he walked past her and she responded with smile and a surge of happiness that buffeted against her father's mental barriers. She was a temperamental girl who often fought with the older children, but she and Kaidan had a special bond. Some people wear their hearts on their sleeves, but Nora wore everything on the surface. She was quick to anger, and even quicker to laughter or tears, but her fury never lasted long and she was the living embodiment of forgive and forget.

Besides her parents, the only other adult she'd formed any bond with was Tali. And her only true friend seemed to be Kenneth and Gabby's second son, Matthew, who Nora had begged her parents to bring along on this outing to the lake. Watching Nora now, playing so happily with Millicent and Rowan, Kaidan was glad he'd held firm and kept it a family trip.

Diving under the chilly water, Kaidan's still strong arms pulled him quickly to where Jane and Everett swam in the middle of the lake under the floating tower. Over the last year they had been coming into their own with their biotics and Kaidan had insisted that they learn how to use their powers in more passive and defensive ways before anything else.

Everett's power seemed to come naturally, and he picked up new skills after only a few tries, but Jane had more trouble. She found it difficult to focus and make her biotics do as she directed. Unfortunately, she'd overheard Kaidan and Catherine talking about this difficulty and now knew about their fear that she would require adrenaline to make full use of her ability.

Since then she had been putting herself in increasingly dangerous scenarios hoping that it would boost her biotic ability. It had taken a quiet, but firm conversation with her Uncle Garrus before she had seen reason and stopped 'falling' from trees and pestering adolescent voras until they charged at her.

With Liara's help, Kaidan had begun to devise safer ways for Jane to test herself. Today she was working on catching herself with a stasis field by letting her brother shove her off the top of the floating tower.

When Kaidan reached them, Jane's look was sour and Everett's was guilty. He felt bad that his sister was having trouble while it all came so easily to him, and it didn't matter how much Jane told him she didn't care.

Treading water beside them, Kaidan tried to offer encouragement, but he couldn't draw a smile from his eldest child.

"You were so close, Jane," he said. "If it was ground you were hitting and not water, you would be bruised but not broken. You just have to reach for the power sooner."

"Dad, I can't do it," she complained. "Not when I know I'm safe."

"Yes, you can," Kaidan said firmly. "Jane, you have the skill, you just have to apply it."

She frowned at him and he grimaced right back. "Jane Alenko, I may not be able to hear which dirty word is going through your head right now, but I can sense it. Don't think for a minute that you're too old for a grounding."

"Sorry, dad," Jane said contritely.

Ever the peacemaker, Everett put in his two cents. "What if I were in the water below you? If you don't catch yourself in time you'll land on me."

"I don't want to hurt you, Ev," Jane said.

Everett gave one of his rare but brilliant smiles and said, "Exactly."

"And to make it a little tougher," Kaidan added. "I'm going to push you, but I'm going to use a biotic push so you won't have any idea when it's coming."

Jane's grin returned and she swam to the bottom of the tower and pulled herself onto the platform. As she went up the ladder to the top, Kaidan gave Everett an affectionate pat on the shoulder.

"You're a good kid," Kaidan said, letting his pride in his boy leech out just a little.

"Thanks, Papa."

Everett only called him papa when they were alone and Kaidan loved it. It reminded him that even his oldest were still just kids. He gave him a kiss on the forehead that Everett didn't shy away from and then followed Jane up the tower.

Everett called that he was in place and before Jane could even step to the edge, Kaidan gave her a gentle nudge with the palm of his hand, surprising her, and she went flailing off the side of the tower.

There was a long pause before Kaidan heard a splash from below followed by shouts of delight.

"Dad, I did it!" Jane cried.

Kaidan peered over the edge at the twins treading water beneath him. Jane's dark brown eyes, so like his own, flared with pride at her achievement. Next to her, Everett beamed at his sister.

"Good job, kid!" Kaidan called down and then took a few steps back to take a running jump off the edge.

He pushed off and pulled his knees up to his chest and shouted.

"Geronimo!"

He hit the water with force, sending a plume of water several meters into the air. Surfacing he shook the water from his hair and challenged the twins to a race to the shore.

He stayed ahead of them most of the way and at the last minute slowed and allowed them to get in front of him. They ran screaming onto the grass above the beach and Jane did a little dance, her coppery brown hair swinging wildly.

Kaidan stood in the shallows with his hands on his hips, water dripping from the hem of his knee length linen shorts.

"Man, you kids are fast," he said in mock defeat. "You'll have to start carrying your old dad soon."

Kaidan was nearing fifty, but he didn't feel it. If anything he felt more viral and energetic than he ever had before. He was still the fit, athletic man he had been, but it was different now. His corded muscles were no longer the powerful tools of a soldier. Their repertoire now included digging, lifting and piggy-back rides.

Catherine had put on little weight after the birth of their youngest, but underneath the delicious new curves she was still as strong and muscled as he was. For the most part their lives were relaxed and easy, but the work that did need to be done was hard and it kept them all in good condition.

Sinking down to sit cross legged beside the rock mountain his children were building, Kaidan watched Catherine where she lay in the sun, one knee bent up and a hand behind her head. Her skin was deeply tanned and her once dark hair was now laced with white streaks. She was only a slightly younger than him, but the stress of her last pregnancy had aged her.

Her face was still youthful and unlined, and her hair was an interesting contrast to her still girlish appearance. Unlike most women, she didn't care overly much about her aging. She always told him that it didn't bother her because every white hair and wrinkle was the mark of life well lived.

As Kaidan watched, Jane stealthily crept up on her mother and tipped her soaking head over her and wrung the water out of her hair. When Catherine sat up in surprise Jane danced away on her long, coltish legs, laughing delightedly.

"I might as well come in now," Catherine said as she stood and cast a baleful glare at Jane who only giggled and ran back into the water with her brother.

She hiked her long skirt up to her thighs and waded into the water to stand over Kaidan and the children.

"That's quite the pile you've built," she said.

"Want to help, mummy?" Millicent asked, he voice still pitched with the height of youth. "It's almost done."

"I think Rowan might have the finishing touch," Catherine said.

Kaidan looked along the beach to see Rowan hauling back a rock in his thin arms. His cheeks puffed with the effort of carrying the stone that Kaidan could have lifted with one hand. Once he reached the pile he strained with all his little boy might and put the rock down at the top of the stack and declared the project complete.

He collapsed into his father's lap and looked up at his mother.

"Do you like our castle, mama?"

"It's great, Rowan," she said, crouching down to cup his face in her hands. "You're such a strong man."

Break time was over quickly and he pushed away from his parents and started gathering more rocks.

"I'm going to build another!"

"Rowan, no," Nora said with exaggerated exasperation. "Let's do something else."

"How about you all go for one last swim?" Catherine suggested. "We'll have to get going soon if we want to be back in time for the party. I'm sure there's a birthday surprise waiting for Nora."

Kaidan felt his heart glow as Nora's face lit up with glee.

"Really?" she cried.

This outing had been her birthday gift. They'd given her new clothes and toys, and paper to draw on, but taking the day off and having a family outing had been the big present. Having a birthday on Wake Day was always tough and Kaidan and Catherine made sure every year that the day was still special for Nora.

"I think there might be something," Kaidan said. "You'll just have to wait and see."

"Let's go now, papa. Please!" she pleaded.

Kaidan laughed at his daughters almost frantic eagerness. Luckily he was saved from having to say no when Rowan ran splashing at them.

"Let's swim more!" he cried. "I don't want to go. Milly promised she would teach me how to swim far underwater."

"I'm only swimming if mummy swims too," Millicent said, folding her arms and staring at Catherine.

"No, mummy wants to stay dry now," Catherine protested.

"Well, we can't have that, can we?"

Kaidan leapt to his feet tackled Catherine, throwing her over his shoulder and racing into deeper water. The air was filled with her cries of protest and shrieks of laughter from the younger children running after them into the lake.

Only when the water was up to his chest did Kaidan drop Catherine, plunging her into the dark blue depths. She looked furious when she surfaced, but they could all feel her internal laughter resounding in their minds.

Rowan doggy paddled his way out to them, biting his lower lip in concentration as he tried to keep up with his sisters. Kaidan ducked under the water and came up under the little boy who wrapped his arms around his neck while Kaidan swam out to the centre of the lake.

They spent another hour frolicking in the water and enjoying the sunshine. At the insistence of his siblings, Rowan jumped from the tower for the first time. Catherine was barely able to contain her worry as her baby leapt from the four meter platform. Only when he came sputtering to the surface beaming did she relax, smothering him with praise and kisses.

They wrapped themselves in warm, soft felt towels and headed back through the forest path to the settlement. Jane and Everett walked ahead, carrying the backpacks filled with the remains of the picnic the family had shared on the beach. Catherine walked in the middle, holding a tired Rowan by the hand and listening to Millicent's endless chatter. Kaidan and Nora walked behind them all, her hand clasped firmly in his in amiable silence.

Her look was serious and Kaidan knew she was thinking hard about something that concerned her. He didn't push her. He knew that if she wanted to talk, she would.

At last she said, "I remember a place."

"What kind of place?" Kaidan asked, curious to know what her mind had revealed to her now.

All the children possessed a degree of genetic memory likely caused by the synthetics, but it was strongest in those born during the Delight. Something about the rays of that tiny, red star enhanced the strength of the memories stored in their DNA. Nora was the only of their children to have been born under Delight.

"It's a place made of metal. A really bright place with a long lake and a sky that's not real."

"That's the Citadel," Kaidan said, his mind going back to the Persidium and its artificial environment. "When we lived in space and on other worlds, it was the centre of everything."

Nora's forehead creased in confusion. "You were there with a woman. You kissed her, but she wasn't mummy."

"That was Commander Shepard," Kaidan told her. "She was... a special friend."

Nora looked up at him gravely, her sandy brown eyes sad. "Do you miss her?"

There was no sense lying to the girl, Kaidan knew. All of his children could tell when their parents were telling them something other than the full truth. It was annoyingly inconvenient at times.

"Sometimes," Kaidan said. "But she's been gone for years and time makes everything easier."

"But you love mummy right?" Nora asked innocently.

Kaidan smiled and looked ahead at his wife, her hips swaying enticingly as she walked, her long, beautiful hair plated down her back in a thick braid.

"So much."

"Good," Nora said, and promptly changed the topic back to her birthday.

Kaidan listened with half an ear as they walked hand in hand through the towering trees. Half way home he had to pick Rowan up and carry him, letting him sleep against his shoulder. It had been a long day for the little guy.

They met up with James and his eldest son, Benjamin, walking back from their own outing and Kaidan fell into step beside his friend while Ben ran ahead to tease Jane as he always did.

James was going bald. He kept his hair buzzed short but it didn't hide the thinning spot on the back of head. He was still a bear of a man, and the tattoos on his neck and arm were fading and stretched. A scruffy beard covered some of the scars on his face, and to anyone who didn't know him he might have looked like a frightening man.

Despite having grown up in the same house as him, James still made Nora nervous and she ran ahead to walk with her mother, looking back over her shoulder at him from time to time.

"Good day?" James asked.

"Great day," Kaidan replied. "Where were you and Ben?"

"Teaching him some wrestling moves," James said. "His little brother is too young to learn so we've been keeping it a secret.

Kaidan laughed. He'd been doing something along the same lines with Jane and Everett. They'd long ago run out of thermal clips for their weapons so bow and arrow had become the only tool available for hunting, and everyone, including the older children were learning how to use them. Nora didn't yet have the upper body strength to use a hunting bow, but she was extremely jealous that the twins could.

"You still up for tonight?" James asked.

"I am," Kaidan said.

"I was thinking it might be nice to invite the Doc this year," James said.

"I already did."

Several years ago, Liara had suggested that Shepard's squad, herself, Kaidan, James, Tali, Garrus and EDI, have a gathering of their own each Wake to look back on their final hours with the Commander.

The second year they had invited Joker as well. He may not have carried a weapon at any point, but he'd always been a vital part of every mission. Cortez came the year after that. Inviting Karin this year had only seemed natural. She had, after all, been with Shepard through everything.

The rest of the crew seemed to understand why they were excluded from the ritual. They may have served on the Normandy with Shepard, but it wasn't the same as charging into battle with her; fighting in perfect unison with, watching each others backs, and fuelling each others adrenaline.

It was the only time each year that Kaidan allowed himself to drift back to those memories. Not all of them were good ones, but he let the bad ones come too. He couldn't let himself forget the perils and near misses either.

Before the little group met at the top of the hill, Kaidan would sit at the fire and do what he had done every year for the past six. He would tell the children the story of how they came to be there.

He'd already taken some poetic license with the tale, taking out some of the more terrifying bits, like the Banshees in the Ardat-Yakshi monastery and the final battle through London where Kaidan, Shepard and Garrus had fought off wave after wave of Husks, Cannibals, Marauders and Brutes. It had been the hardest battle of his life and Kaidan didn't like to remember it.

Joker complained that Kaidan had romanticized the story too much, but everyone else liked the new, less harrowing version. There was no need to remember it as a nightmare. After all, the morals of the story remained the same; courage, loyalty, compassion, and friendship.

The party was in full swing as the sun set and Shepard's Delight took her place high in the sky, bathing the revellers in her crimson glow. That their arrival had coincided with the day of the small star's zenith every third year was quickly becoming part of Kaidan's story.

Nora waited patiently all evening, and after the story was told, before he sent her off to bed, he and Catherine presented her with her special gift. A leather harness and a rope so she could go climbing with Matthew who loved the sport and had always been eager for her to join him.

She cried tears of joy and when Kaidan tucked her into bed she was clinging to the bundle and fell sleep with it in her arms.

He and Catherine stood together at the doors of each of their children's' rooms in turn and watched them sleep.

"Hard to believe we've been here nearly a decade," Catherine said, leaning against Kaidan as they looked in on Rowan.

The little boy lay face down under his blankets, exhausted after his long day of hiking, swimming and playing. His face was still smeared with berry juice and his hand was wrapped around the leg of the bear that had once been Catherine's.

"It's easy to forget we were ever anywhere else," Kaidan said. "It feels like another life, everything that came before."

"I know what you mean," Catherine sighed. "Sometimes it's easier to imagine that it was. I still wake up sometimes in the night and ache for Earth, wishing I could see it one last time."

"You know what does it to me?" Kaidan said, thinking back to his childhood. "Birds. I used to bird watch with my dad. I knew every bird call. I'd love to hear a robin in the evening one more time."

"Mm. I miss the smells," Catherine said dreamily. "The sharp smell of a pine forest, or cottonwoods in the spring."

"Do you want to come tonight?" Kaidan asked on impulse.

"No," Catherine replied quickly. "This is your night with the squad. I don't belong there. Even Tali and Garrus don't go as a couple. But speaking of which, they are waiting for you."

Kaidan wrapped his arms around her and crushed her to him. Her hair smelled like citrus and wood smoke and he breathed the scent in deep. Her body was so familiar against his and yet still so exciting.

"Thank you, Catherine," he whispered to her.

"For what?"

"For everything. This life. These kids. Understanding. Everything."

She held him tighter and kissed his neck just below his ear. He felt a rush of pleasure and ran his hands down her sides to her hips.

"You're welcome. Now go to your party. I won't wait up," she said, then added, "Unless you want me to."

Kaidan reach out for the knob to Rowan's door and pulled it shut before answering her.

"Wait up," he said huskily, and kissed her passionately before heading out to meet with his old friends.

Kaidan was the last to arrive on the hill top. Karin, her age truly beginning to show in her white hair and wrinkling face, sat at a place of honour at the end of the table Kaidan and James had carried up the hill the day before.

EDI, who looked more lifelike than ever, was already recounting her favourite story, which only featured Shepard peripherally. It was the moment she realized that Legion had self actualized and become an individual. He had said 'I' instead of 'we' and EDI had been the first to pick up on it.

Kaidan took a seat between Liara and Garrus and listened intently despite the fact that he had heard the story many times, and had been present at the actual moment.

James poured him a glass of beer from his newest batch and slid it across the table. Liara linked her arm through his and he felt a swell of emotion as she let down her barriers and eased their minds together.

As they talked and told stories of the past, Kaidan and Liara experienced them in another way, witnessing the sights and sounds of those adventures in their minds. Remembering the good times as well as the bad.

Tali remembered the celebration after Saren's defeat where Shepard had gotten so drunk she'd passed out on the stairs up to the CIC and Garrus and Kaidan, who had been equally as drunk had had to carry her to her cabin. It had been the only time they'd really seen her let her hair down.

Joker recalled their narrow escape from the Collector base and finally admitted to Garrus that if it hadn't been for all his endless calibrations, the Normandy might have taken a hit. Garrus threatened to calibrate Joker and the light mood continued.

As their inebriation increased the mood became melancholy and tears were shed by all but the most hardened in the group, which pretty much included only Garrus and James. Even Kaidan felt a tear slid down his cheek as he remembered his farewell to Shepard.

He'd told her he knew it was goodbye and she'd promised to be waiting when it was all over. He closed his eyes and remembered the last touch of her lips. That final moment of femininity before she'd pulled on her helmet and gone screaming into battle.

Garrus too was remembering his last words to Shepard.

"She told me that there was no Shepard without Vakarian," he said as he gazed up at the gleaming red orb in the sky. "Sometimes I wonder if there could be a Vakarian without Shepard. I don't know where I would be if it hadn't been for her. Kicked out of C-Sec, disgraced from Palaven, probably rotting away on Omega, miserable and alone. She really was my best friend."

He trailed off, staring down into his drink, and Tali put a loving hand on his arm.

"She dragged us all out of something," the quarian said. "I can only hope we did the same for her."

"Well, I know I pulled her ass out of the fire more than once," Joker put in. He was silent for moment before he added, "I miss her too."

Before the atmosphere could get any more dour, James stood and raised his glass high, wobbling a bit as he did.

"To Shepard! The toughest, most loco chick on two legs. Best soldier and compadre there ever was."

"Shepard!" they all shouted together.

And then Karin stood and everyone went silent, waiting for her wise words.

"Many times I have said that I think of you all as my children. But no one more than Commander Shepard. Her own mother was a wonderful woman, but she couldn't be there when she was needed most. Before our return to Earth that last time, she confided in me her fears, and do you know what plagued her the most? What kept her up with worry and guilt? She agonized over what would happen to all of us. She wanted to know that we would be safe and happy no matter what happened to her. I think I can speak for all of us when I say she would be pleased."

"Hear hear," Cortez shouted and raised his glass again. He drank deeply and then rose unsteadily from his seat. "I couldn't have asked for a better life, but if I drink anymore, tomorrow will not be a happy day."

Laughter rippled around the table and one by one they slowly got up to leave, following Steve's drunken path down the hill, until only Kaidan and Liara remained. She'd been quiet all evening.

"Staying a bit longer?" Kaidan asked, not wanting to leave her alone if she needed the company.

"I think so," she said softly. "I'm remembering more than Shepard tonight. Tessa has been asking me a lot of questions about her father lately and it's brought up many emotions I thought I had put to rest."

"About Javik or your own father?" Kaidan asked.

"Both," she replied. "It's reminded me of just how long my life will be. When all of you are gone, who will sit at this table with me and remember the past?"

"There will always be EDI," Kaidan said. "Who knows how long her body will last."

"But will her presence be a comfort or a painful reminder?" Liara asked, her voice toneless. "Asari are raised to understand and accept the fleeting nature of life and love and relationships, but just like how Garrus always says he was never a very good turian, I was never a very good asari. I am too attached."

"You're also very drunk, Liara," Kaidan said comfortingly. "Things never look quite as bleak when you're sober. You can't think about the future that way. You have to remember that when we're gone and you're still here, there will other generations for you to know and love. Life will go on without us."

"You're right, Kaidan," Liara said. "Catherine has really rubbed off on you. I don't remember your advice ever being quite so... useful."

"Gee, thanks," Kaidan laughed.

"I meant it in a good way," Liara said.

"I know." Kaidan pushed himself to his feet and felt the blood rush from his head. "I am very drunk. I should go to bed."

"Me too," Liara mumbled, her words becoming slurred as she stood and leaned on him to steady herself.

They walked down the hill together in silent companionship, parting outside the hall and each heading for their own homes. Kaidan could see a light still on in his own bedroom and knew Catherine was still awake and waiting for him.

He wove his way down the path, opened his front door and took one last look up at Shepard's Delight. She sat hovering on the horizon, framed by trees and accented by moonlight.

Kaidan breathed a deep lungful of the sweet night air and let it out through his nose, feeling a smile grow on his lips as he did.

"Thanks for everything, Shepard," he said into the darkness. "We owe you one."

The End