Disclaimer: Bleach belongs to Tite Kubo. Oh, and I don't own Bunnicula either.
Notes: For the record, Rabbit Cafés do exist ('cause yannoe, Japan has everything over there).

(ICHIGO)

10:10 pm

I hadn't planned on descending the tower so soon. At least not by the stairs anyway.

It's not like I had a sudden will to live. I didn't feel as though I've reached some divine sense of fulfillment. And I certainly didn't fall in fucking love.

But when I turned around and saw the look on Rukia's face, I didn't think either- I just grabbed her by the wrist and booked it because I knew she didn't want to be here. It was like I had embodied the mentality of a less-buff version of Superman. I needed to get her out of there. The feeling clawed at my neck and I'd regret it forever if I didn't.

I mean, how much would it suck to be sent straight to Hell right after I selfishly threw myself off and left her to fend for herself?

The expression that had befallen Rukia should be downright illegal. It was this mix of pure terror and surprise cast over her enormous (did I mention enormous?) midnight eyes. Now multiply that by a thousand and you'll know why I couldn't just throw her a peace sign and say, "See ya, wouldn't wanna be ya!"

Upon reaching the ground level, we immediately began to sprint in a blind direction (North? South? East? West? I didn't have a damn clue; I don't think she did either). The beating in our chests sped up along with the cadenced thumps of our footsteps.

I wasn't sure how far we ran, but I could see that Rukia was starting to breathe harder and stride slower. I stopped altogether when she began to stagger behind me. "Hey are you alright?" I called out. She stumbled as she approached me. I held out my arms in attempt to steady her, but she managed to stay standing.

"I'm fine," she coughed out. Her eyes glanced around to speculate our surroundings. "Where are we?"

I shrugged. "I don't know. You tell me."

Rukia muttered something along the lines of, "Useless," as she made her way towards the intersection of the road. "Never mind that. Where are we going?"

I scratched my head in annoyance. "Look Lady, we were being hunted down by a couple of noble guards just now, how the hell was I supposed to plan a destination route while running for my life?"

She stifled a giggle. "For your life huh?"

Maybe I should've just stranded her on the roof after all.

"Let's just figure out where the hell we are first," I scowled impatiently as I read the street signs. "Maybe we can ask someone in one of these stores…" I turned around, but she was nowhere in sight. "Rukia?"

Where had that brat disappeared to?

I darted past the wandering insomniacs, frantically trying to catch a glimpse of a short girl with raven black hair. How the hell did she slip away like that? This wasn't how my night was supposed to go. I was supposed to be at the bottom of the tower right now. Bruised and battered.

But instead, I was on a wild goose chase with a girl who was simply too everything.

Too noble. Too cute. Too annoying.

Too much.

I wasn't even sure if I liked her or not.

The point being: I was still very much alive- and I still didn't want to be.

I finally spotted the movement of her sheer white kimono slip among a group of people milling around. Rukia had her hands and forehead pressed against the window of a coffee shop. The warm glow emitting from inside reflected onto her face.

Jesus, was she sheltered in a cave her whole life or what? She was acting as if she'd never seen a café up close before.

As I approached her, I crouched down to her height to see what she was ogling at. "God damn it Rukia, you could at least say something before you run off like that…" My voice trailed off as my eyes shifted to the window.

Behind the glass were litters of miniature, fluffy bunnies.

I kid you not.

Round little rabbits hopped across the wooden floorboards in staccato leaps. They rolled around and played with one another like the dumb animals they were. "What the hell…"

Rukia suddenly looked up at me with these really sparkly eyes. "Can we go inside? Pleeease?"

If I wasn't so freaking thirsty I never would've agreed. But there I was, agreeing to enter this stupid "Rabbit Café." (Believe it or not but that's what the sign said).

My first thought when entering the place was, 'This can't be sanitary'. But as I stepped in further, it finally sunk in that, 'I am walking into a room full of God forsaken rabbits.'

Call me a pussy all you want, but it is not a laughing matter when I say that rabbits scared the crap out of me.

Flashback to nine years ago. Me sitting on a couch watching some documentary on the Discovery Channel.

The guy behind the camera goes, "Two hares in their natural habitat face one another. The rabid male jackrabbit now prepares to pounce on its female competitor. It appears that the viral disease has already affected the male jackrabbit's salivary glands. Notice how there is saliva already beginning to foam at the mouth! My that is a lot of saliva…ahem, the two rodents raise their paws to strike one another. Hare boxing is common, but if this rabid jackrabbit decides to sink its teeth- oh here we go. The infected rabbit has now bitten into the flesh of its female competitor. The viral disease will most likely transfer to the female. Oh- the rabid jackrabbit is really working on tearing her skin apart. He's definitely digging his teeth in there alright. This violent behaviour is most uncommon in rabbits…"

Now back on the couch, a younger me is sitting there with a pretzel hanging from my mouth as I watched in trepidation.

My little sister Karin still teases me about my irrational fear of rabbits to this day. It didn't help that my old man bought me that dumb Bunnicula book for my ninth birthday. (Really dad? Vampiric bunnies?)

So walking into the Rabbit Café was just a trigger to my traumatizing experience with the Nature Network. As I began to take a few steps back, Rukia practically dove for one of the fuzzy fur-balls. She started to preen and coo at the thing in that annoying high-pitched voice that girls did.

"Aww! You're a little cutie aren't you? Yes you are you cutie-patootie! Awww!"

A girl came running towards us with her hands outstretched to the rabbit that Rukia was coddling. "Hairclip! You naughty rabbit!" the lady scolded.

The rabbit's name was Hairclip? What the fuc-

"I'm sorry, when we opened the doors to the petting room, Hairclip just dashed right out of there!" She took Hairclip back into her arms. "Table for two?"

"Yeah," I said. She seated us in one of the tables closest to the petting room. When I glanced at Rukia, she looked like she had died and gone to heaven.

If heaven was some warped bunny vortex I mean.

When Rangiku Matsumoto- according to her nametag- handed us the menus, she suddenly opened her mouth and gasped. I looked around to see what she was so excited about. She pointed at me. "I know you! You're that adorable boyfriend of Orihime Inoue's! Oh you guys are just so perfect for each other! She's an absolute darling, but you're even cuter in person!" she exclaimed.

I could see Rukia in my peripheral vision with a smirk on her face. I shot her a threatening glare before responding to Rangiku's squeal. "We're not dating anymore," I muttered under my breath. I hated that I had to repeat myself to every single person who recognized me.

Rankgiku's eyes widened in surprise. "Oh you poor, poor thing! C'mere you," she wrapped her arms around my head and pressed my face up against her exposed cleavage. I could practically feel my cheeks turning every possible shade of red.

"I- can't- breathe," I choked out. But it sounded more like, "Errgh kerrgh berrgh!"

Once she finally released me from her talons, I inhaled a deep breath.

Then she gasped again, but I was prepared this time- I ducked for cover.

"And you're that girl from the noble Kuchiki family! Would you please tell your brother that he's absolutely gorgeous for me? This is so exciting!" Rangiku squealed. "I'll leave you two for now, call me whenever you're ready to order!" She winked at us before strutting over to the next table.

I picked up a menu and absent-mindedly flipped through its pages. "I'm not sure, but I think I was just sexually harassed," I said dryly.

Rukia rolled her eyes. "As if. You totally enjoyed that. Anyway, what are you ordering?" she leaned towards me.

I scoffed. "You know, when I said I wanted to have my last grandiose meal, a dinky little cafe wasn't exactly what I had in mind."

"Oh shut up, I really want to go see the petting room," she said.

I gave her a bemused look. "Demanding little princess aren't you?"

She kicked me from under the table. Spasms of pain shot up my leg when her foot collided into my shin. My knee immediately hit the table, causing me to experience even more agony. I crouched over to hold my bruised limb. "Can you stop abusing me?" I cried out. "It hurts you know!"

"As it should," she snapped.

I scowled at her, but she was already looking through the menu. I began to read through mine as well. The silly little bunny drawings that bordered each page were extremely distracting.

It appeared that they were very consistent with their rodent theme.

Rabbit shaped mochi cakes? Bunnysicles?

Chappycinnos?

What has the world come to?

(RUKIA)

10:30 pm

Honestly, I wanted everything on the menu. From the rabbit stencilled crepes to each flavour of the adorable bunnypops.

But I had already eaten, so I probably couldn't stomach any more food. Besides, I could hardly contain my excitement about going to the petting room after. I'd probably just inhale all the food. Our waitress came back several moments later.

Rangiku took out a notebook and pen from her breast pocket. "So what can I get you two love doves?" she chirped.

"We're not love doves!" Ichigo and I both cried out in unison.

"Whatever you say," she sang with a wink.

I fumed and slammed both my hands on the table. The thought of me and Ichigo was ridiculous.

"I'm serious. Even if the entire male species died off from some testicular cancer and Ichigo here was the only dope who remained immune, I still wouldn't look at him that way. In fact, if we were the last two people on Earth and it was up to us to revive the human race I-"

"We get the picture! The feeling is mutual by the way," Ichigo interrupted rudely.

I crossed my arms in a huffy manner.

"I'll just have a regular black coffee," he said.

"Ooh, how very masculine of you!" Rangiku gushed. She turned to face me. "What about you sweetie?"

I could see the hint of red on Ichigo's face. It was all quite amusing actually. "A Chappyccino for me would be good," I said.

Rangiku pouted. "Aww, you're not going to try any of our food? Alright then, two drinks coming right up!" She closed her book and headed towards the kitchen.

Ichigo began to fiddle with the salt and pepper shakers. "It figures that you'd get a cappuccino," he said.

"A Chappy-"

"Yeah, Chappyccino, whatever."

"And why's that?" I inquired.

"Cappuccino drinkers are supposed to be really bubbly and-"

"You think I'm bubbly?" I beamed.

"-materialistic, as well as shallow, maybe a little airheaded-"

I quickly cut in. "And where are you getting this information from?" I scowled. "What about you Mr. Masculine?" I began to wave me hands dramatically. "Hey look at me, I'm Ichigo. So tall and strong, duh huh huh."

"Tall and strong eh?" Ichigo said smugly.

Ugh, how infuriating. "Shut up, I was mocking you. And black coffee is disgusting," I pointed out.

"Rangiku doesn't think so," he smirked. "And sheesh I was just playing with you. Apparently cappuccino drinkers are well-liked and outgoing too."

I felt my face flush. "You sure have a lot of time on your hands."

We both looked at Rangiku as she came back holding two cups. "Here you go," she said as she slid the cups in front of us. "Call me if you need anything else!"

I looked down at my drink. There was a cute little bunny head outlined by the creamy froth on the surface. This was officially my favourite place ever.

I took a sip before glancing up at Ichigo. He had already stirred his bunny foam into oblivion. "What's it like to be famous?" I piped up curiously.

He blinked. "I told you before, I'm not famous."

"Complete strangers recognize you, I'd say that's pretty darn famous. Come on, you used to date Orihime Inoue, she's on all those magazine covers and stuff," I said softly. A hint of self-consciousness washed over me.

Ichigo tightened his grip on his cup. "Yeah, well, she was famous. People just followed me around because they liked that I liked her."

"I swear I saw you in one of those ten page spread things posing with Orihime somewhere. You seemed pretty model-esque to me," I said teasingly.

He averted his eyes, but I caught the embarrassed look on his face. "I had to be physically dragged out of my house for that shoot. Believe me, I have the battle scars to prove it," he scoffed.

I wasn't surprised that people wanted to take photos of him. He was undeniably handsome, the kind of handsome you wanted to capture and keep inside your pocket.

I finally put my cup down. "I don't get it."

He gave me a puzzled look."Don't get what?"

I sighed. "Why you'd want to end your life. Everyone loves you. You'd be really selfish to want to hurt all those people."

Ichigo's eyebrows furrowed. "I have 'Orihime's Boyfriend' permanently stapled on my forehead. They don't 'love' me."

I narrowed my eyes. "But is that really so bad? All of that will pass over at some point. What about your friends and family?" I pushed on.

Ichigo was quiet for a moment. I could tell that this got him thinking.

His face suddenly twisted into an annoyed expression. "Well you're the freakin' heir of the Kuchiki clan, you're as valuable as us human beings get. How do you think the entire Karakura Town will react if they found your dead body on the pavement?"

I felt my chest constrict. That was unfair. The people of Karakura didn't know me personally; if I died, they'd boo-hoo for maybe a day or two then move on. I was rarely allowed to leave my house, let alone meet new people. Byakuya never even looked at me unless he absolutely had to. Ichigo seemed like the type of person who had star-on-the-tree Christmas dinners, and full turkey Thanksgiving meals with his family.

"No one would miss me," I said firmly.

His gaze intensified. "Quit with the melodrama, there's plenty of people who'll weep over your death bed," he rolled his eyes.

I gripped the cushion of my chair. "Like my brother who'd rather kill me himself? Or all those people who tolerate me only because they loved Hisana? Why would you throw your life away if you're constantly surrounded by nothing but admiration?"

Anger flashed in his eyes. "Because I wanted a life of my own, but I couldn't do anything with all those God damned people chasing me around," he exclaimed through grit teeth.

He slammed his drink back down on the table as well.

It made me sick to think about how pathetically lonely I was. Even Yoruichi and Kiyone only stuck with me probably because Byakuya asked them to.

And I had ruined my relationship with the only person who ever made me feel alive.

…Kaien…

I covered my ears and shook my head. "Shut up Ichigo, just shut up. You think life is so hard because people like you? Well that's a load of bullshit. Think about how it might feel to have no one truly like you. Then you can mourn." I shot up from my seat and made a beeline for the door.

Once I made it outside, I leaned my back against the window of the café. I hugged myself to keep warm. The dozens of fireflies that danced around the street lamps made faint buzzing noises.

I hated how I was such an emotional wreck. It was even worse that Ichigo had to witness this terrible side of me. He was probably grumbling about how much of a bitch I was for leaving him with the tab back inside.

What did I even want from Ichigo anyway? For him to overlook my status and forgive me for being me? I felt like an idiot for even hoping for such a thing from a stranger. We were only seeking solace in one another. We fed off of each others misery. All of it was just too fucking depressing.

I began to walk up the street. I didn't have enough money to call a taxi, nor was I sure about where I was going, but maybe I could haggle a bag of chips from the convenient store. When I spotted a Kara-Mart up ahead, I sped up my pace a bit. I stopped in front of the store and lifted my hand to pull open the door.

My fingers looked blue from the cold. I could only hope that this run-down looking shack had electric heating.

I suddenly felt a sure grasp on my arm.

"Rukia."

Fuck.

I whirled around and looked up to see Ichigo. His grip burned a hole in my skin, but I was shivering.

"If you want me to pay you back, I promise I will," I swallowed. I tried to pull away from him, but he held on. I didn't want him to see me in such a fragmented state.

"Idiot," he chided. "You're still wearing my sweater."

I looked down at his baggy zip up. Oh.

I blushed. "Sorry. Here," I began to slip one arm out of the sleeve.

"I didn't say that I wanted it back yet," Ichigo said. His expression softened. "You're supposed to be optimistic, all cappuccino drinkers are." A grin out broke on his face.

I wanted to punch him for being so nice. I wanted to kiss him for being so nice. I started to cry.

Ichigo put his arm around my head. He didn't seem to notice that I was soaking his shirt with tears and probably snot. Or if he did, he didn't point it out.

God, this was so humiliating.

Forgive me for totally twisting their personalities into little OOC monsters. Of course I love the original Ichigo and Rukia, but this is just too fun :P Please leave review, I'd like to know what I can improve on! In the meantime, I'll work on improving my sucky pacing haha

Also, I'm aware that rabbits rarely contract rabies. But all that matters is that it's possible...:D