14 September – I actually think that I am in England at the moment
I started walking back to where Skulduggery stood, but I was stopped by the line of infected.
'Hello, little vampire-ish thing. Comment ca va?' I asked it.
It growled at me.
'Nice to know you as well. I am fine thank you for asking. Now you are going to let me through and then start attacking. You see, I am new to this all and you are going to help me by attacking me after I am in safely right?' I asked it and it stepped aside.
I stared at it as I moved to Skulduggery and Valkyrie.
'How did you do that?' he asked me.
I looked at him with a straight face.
'J'ai vu bon roman policier,' I said and looked back over to the infected.
'How did that happen?' the evil villain said. 'No matter. Kill them!' she screamed and the infected did nothing.
'Sit in a circle and play duck, duck, goose I yelled at them in return after the woman did and they started to play.
'My own army of infected by the age of fourteen. Best thing to happen ever,' I said and looked at Skulduggery.
'I have an explanation for that but you won't understand my genius,' Skulduggery said staring at it.
We soon captured the villain, fixed the infected and went back into the sanctuary a whole hour after we walked out for "ten minutes or until the lunatic cools down". HA!
We walked in and I saw Julia Gillard on a chair looking slightly, pissed, shall I say?
'A whole hour?' Erskine asked. 'How did that happen? She took that long to cool down?'
'No. we were attacked,' Val said.
'When are you not,' I muttered.
'God helps us,' Julia said. I listened to them talk for a little while before I sat down and started to write in my diary.
'Why did punch Julia? She seems like a nice person,' Erskine said.
'Yeah, no. She is evil. She made the whole country collapse,' I said.
'What? Why?' Val asked.
'She is… was the Prime Minister. LOSER!' I yelled at her.
'Good to know that I have one supporter,' she muttered in response and Ghastly tried not to laugh. Tanith like normal just burst out laughing.
'Hey Val!' I said to her randomly.
'Oh god. Yes?' she answered back.
'Thank you for that,' I started sarcastically, 'Why don't we just watch movies tonight and listen to music. You know. Us and Tanith,' I said. Dam that sounded retarded.
'Might as well. You can get us interested in some Australian Artists and I can get you into some movies. What movies do you know?' she asked me.
'Like none,' I said back to her.
'Ok. Do you have any suggestions to what we should watch?' Tanith asked.
'Yep. Twilight. We can make fun of the vampires in it,' I muttered.
'You know Julia,' I said. 'You remind me of a pigeon. One that is annoying everyone in town and they want to kill it. I know a lot of people who want to kill you,' I told her and looked at the roof. It was really low!
'Do you know what half the battle is?' I asked Julia.
'No,' she replied back.
'Trying. Trying is half the battle,' I said.
'And what's the other half?' Skulduggery asked looking at me with suspicion in his eyes.
'Hitting him more times than he hits me,' I said and shrugged.
'Who was the evil villain that you threw in the Gaol?' Ghastly asked us.
'Don't know, don't care, hope not, so there,' I replied automatically to him again.
'You're helpful,' he said to me.
'I know I am. Thank you so much for saying so,' I replied and laughed. More idle conversation went on. I was starting to think of home. Would I ever get back? Who had noticed I was missing? Did they just think I was over a friend's house or were they actually worried?
I was silent for the whole trip back to the mansion. I didn't belong in this world. II never would unless I created something in it for me. Everyone here had Irish accents but I had an Australian one. What was up with that?
If I was at home right now… I thought as I looked at my watch. It was still set to Australian time. I would be writing about this all, or doing a household chore or reading or even in school. It is so odd not to be in school at the moment.
I got out of the car and walked inside, going straight to the kitchen. Once there I sat down on one of the chairs and put my head in my arms.
I was stuck in a foreign country with no clue as to why or how I got there. I felt the tears start to pour out. What was I doing here?
I felt a hand rubbing my shoulder soothingly. After about three minutes of a mystery person doing this, I looked up to see Fletcher watching me slightly worried.
'What's wrong?' He asked me.
'What's wrong?' I asked back. 'What's wrong?' I repeated myself.
'I am here, in a foreign country that I have never been to before, soling crimes like murders and everything for a magic community that doesn't exist apart from in my head. And your asking what's wrong?' I sighed after my out burst. Why was I here?
I text my best friend with nothing to do.
Sup?
A moment later a reply came.
Nothing new. You?
I give up on the whole Skulduggery thing. I just want to be home again.
Yeah. I can understand…sorta.
I gave up on that conversation as well. Tanith walked into the kitchen.
'Vint, we're about to start watching this "twilight" you suggested. Fletch, piss off,' she said and walked back into the room.
'Thank you,' I said to him. I meant it with all my heart. I do need to vent every now and again.
'No problem. Her is my number is you need me,' he said and disappeared.
I walked into the main room with the T.V. and started watching. By the end, the three of us were laughing so hard we couldn't breathe and I was the first person to recover.
'And that ladies is why I suggested it to you,' I said regal like.
'To so that? People pay to watch that?' Val asked.
'Yep. They go and watched a Creepy Depressed 100 year old virgin,' I said. And we all started laughing again.
We watched Narnia, the lion, the witch, and the wardrobe. I love the Narnian Lullaby. No fun was made with that though. It is a stunning movie.
We then started singing and dancing. I plugged my phone in.
'This is the first one I am going to show you all today,' I said and put it on.
There's an old Australian stockman, lying, dying,
and he gets himself up on one elbow,
and he turns to his mates,
who are gathered 'round him and he says:
Watch me wallabys feed mate.
Watch me wallabys feed.
They're a dangerous breed mate.
So watch me wallabys feed.
Altogether now!
Tie me kangaroo down sport,
tie me kangaroo down.
Tie me kangaroo down sport,
tie me kangaroo down.
Keep me cockatoo cool, Curl,
keep me cockatoo cool.
Don't go acting the fool, Curl,
just keep me cockatoo cool.
Altogether now!
Take me koala back, Jack,
take me koala back.
He lives somewhere out on the track, Mac,
so take me koala back.
Altogether now!
Let me Abos go loose, Lou, *
let me Abos go loose.
They're of no further use, Lou,
so let me Abos go loose.
Altogether now!
Mind me platypus duck, Bill,
mind me platypus duck.
Don't let him go running amok, Bill,
mind me platypus duck.
Altogether now!
Play your digeridoo, Blue,
play your digeridoo.
Keep playing 'til I shoot thro' Blue,
play your digerydoo.
Altogether now!
Tan me hide when I'm dead, Fred,
tan me hide when I'm dead.
So we tanned his hide when he died Clyde,
(Spoken) And that's it hanging on the shed.
Altogether now!
Tanith and Val laughed at the end of it.
'I like the wobbling sound. What is it?' Tanith asked.
'A wash board if I remember correctly,' I said back thinking.
'Another song!' called Val.
'This one is slower and softer sounding,' I warned before putting it on.
I came from the dreamtime from the dusty red soil plains
I am the ancient heart, the keeper of the flame
I stood upon the rocky shore
I watched the tall ships come
For forty thousand years I'd been the first Australian.
I came upon the prison ship bowed down by iron chains.
I cleared the land, endured the lash and waited for the rains.
I'm a settler.
I'm a farmer's wife on a dry and barren run
A convict then a free man I became Australian.
I'm the daughter of a digger who sought the mother lode
The girl became a woman on the long and dusty road
I'm a child of the depression
I saw the good times come
I'm a bushy, I'm a battler
I am Australian
[chorus]
We are one, but we are many
And from all the lands on earth we come
We share a dream and sing with one voice
I am, you are, we are Australian
I'm a teller of stories
I'm a singer of songs
I am Albert Namatjira
I paint the ghostly gums
I am Clancy on his horse
I'm Ned Kelly on the run
I'm the one who waltzed Matilda
I am Australian
I'm the hot wind from the desert
I'm the black soil of the plains
I'm the mountains and the valleys
I'm the drought and flooding rains
I am the rock, I am the sky
The rivers when they run
The spirit of this great land
I am Australian
[chorus]
We are one, but we are many
And from all the lands on earth we come
We share a dream and sing with one voice
I am, you are, we are Australian
We are one, but we are many
And from all the lands on earth we come
We share a dream and sing with one voice
I am, you are, we are Australian
'That's a nice one,' Val said.
We played a couple more of the more well know songs (last Friday night and others) and danced and killed high notes. I don't really think that it was counted as singing as it was very scary if it was singing.
The party went well into midnight and by the time we all collapsed into bed, we couldn't talk.
Today
Today I read. I had nothing else to do, I was tired and I felt like I needed to read Gordon's books while I still could. Other than that I did nothing. I don't think I even ate. I haven't seen Val at all but I know for a fact that Tanith only appeared at midday to eat then practice. Then she went back to sleep on the couch.
Live Long and Remian Ugly
Vintage Sketch
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I would like to thank anyone who has reviewed/ put me on story alert/ favourited. Even those people I forced to read :) (In the middle because I know how annoying it is to read :) )
REVIEW!
Alyss Mainwaring
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