Hey guys! Sorry it's been so freaking LONG, but here I am! Coming to you recorded and written down! Enjoy the friends POVs this time and next time...next time something will turn in slow motion, coming at you from all angles. You might be surprised or not, but I assure you, it will make all you wild fangirls and fanboys giggle and (quote: 'ooo-ahhhh') sigh in dreamy fever! KYAAA~
MP3SKULL(.)COM
"I Surrender" by Celine Dion (excerpt below)
Shika POV
Reaching in the drawer, I pulled out the black and grey puppy and grimaced. Kiba would love her, yes, but I knew this meant many nights of having to get up and let the damn thing out. But ever since Tsume took Akamaru back because he had good bloodlines and she wanted a litter to sell.
She'd promised to have him back within a year, but in the meantime, Kiba was the one suffering without his best friend. In my hands, the tiny girl wriggled and whimpered, hoping to get a lick on my face. Oh no she didn't; I jerked back and scowled at her, softening only when she realized I wasn't the cuddly type.
Instead, she went limp and stared back at me, calming down and looking sleepy. Maybe this wouldn't be so bad after all. Pulling her forward, I cautiously wrapped my arms around her, relaxing as she snuggled into my neck and sighed soft, hot puppy breath. Then, closing the drawer again, I went to lie on the bed, staring at her as she watched me with great big black eyes, puppy blue fading from them fast.
"You and I might be able to be friends," I muttered, and turned so Kiba would see her when he came in. Christmas was the day after tomorrow but I just didn't have the patience to try and hide her another day. Keeping my boyfriend out of his own sock drawer had been hard for even two days, and I blamed the seller since I'd asked for them to hold her until today. Damn Juura and her recommendations.
But they'd sold the others and people wanted her, so I'd bought her fast and made my escape.
The doorknob turned just when I was half-asleep, and I relaxed further into the bed, cracking one eye open. But Kiba had his back to me and the only thing I could see was his butt as he leaned over to take his shoes off. Not a bad view…
Finally he turned back and saw us, eyes opening wide. His mouth dropped open and the corners curved into a giant grin, the brunette flinging himself onto the bed and almost bouncing us off. The little pup squealed and buried herself deeper into my chest, her noise wet and cold on my arm.
"PUPPPYY!" He shrieked and grabbed us, hugging us tightly. The little girl whined and he let go, cooing at her gently in apology. Then he snatched me and kissed me hard, shoving me into the pillows and smiling into a sigh.
"You're welcome?" I murmured into the kiss and he laughed, licking my lips hungrily.
"Wait!" I reluctantly pushed him away, "We shouldn't scar her for life! She'll be terrified of both of us, not to mention the bed!" Kiba laughed and flipped over so he was lying between my legs, head resting on my shoulder.
The pup squirmed around until I let go, her wobbly little legs carrying her over Kiba's head and down his face, rolling onto his tummy, and growling at his hand as he poked her fat little stomach, full of wet puppy food and milk that I'd given her for lunch. He held her carefully and wormed his way up until he was right against me, one of his legs entwined with mine, nestled right against my neck.
We watched the puppy fall asleep between us and snuffled at our shirts.
"Thank you for this," he whispered and kissed the hand I had on his shoulder, nuzzling it gently.
"Love you," I whispered back, letting my head fall onto his slowly, tufts of unruly brown hair ruffled around my nose.
"Love you too, Shika."
Falling asleep like that, we woke up around eight the next morning and I groaned loudly, shaking the smaller man firmly, "Today's the day. Come on, I gotta get dressed. Sakura will kill us if you're late and I have to go pick Juura and the others up at the airport. Kiba!"
He frowned and stuck his tongue out at me, snuggling deeper into me. Shoving him off finally, I grabbed the puppy as he fell off the bed and onto the carpet, cursing me rather colorfully.
"Oh just get your stuff ready so I can take you over."
"Nuu! The cruel slavery of the pink-haired one is terrible!"
"...sorry. But it's worse when you disobey her. Just get ready and I'll keep her away. We get to go Christmas shopping!" I moaned and rolled off the other side, twisting so the little girl was held in the crook of one arm, silent and staring at both of us.
Putting her down on the thick grey carpet, I tugged off my shirt and pulled on another one, jerking my Pumas on over the ankle socks I'd worn to bed. She sniffed at the discarded shirt and snuggled into it cutely, nosing her way so she was half-buried by it.
Then, yanking the mini-fridge open, I untwisted a Dr. Pibb and gulped it down, tossing a second can to Kiba, who chugged it as he brushed his hair out of his face and massaged a tiny blob of gel into the spikes so they stood up in a nice unruly mop that somehow looked very sexy. He shook it and grinned at my like he knew what I was thinking and shook his hips a little.
"Oh that's real nice, Kiba. Just knock the lamp over with your big-ass butt," I chuckled as the hood over the light swayed, bumped by said booty. He scowled and sniffed, shaking again and carefully avoiding the lamp. I growled and went over sliding a hand around to stroke his neck and feeling the shudder race through his body.
But before we could do anything more, the little girl whined, tugging at the shirt to get loose. Reaching over, I pulled her up into a hug and kissed Kiba on the forehead, muttering, "Later. I promise. But get ready. I guess she's coming with me, so I'll take her out to pee. Meet me at the car." I sighed and thought to myself, 'already a troublesome damn day.'
Grabbing my keys, I made sure my thick light brown hair was tucked away in my ponytail, before heading out and shutting the pale red door behind me, locking it up tight as another click made me turn. Naruto was looking over at me and grinned so hard I was actually surprised when his face didn't split in half.
He wasn't fooling me, even though it seemed like everyone was oblivious, not wanting to see that he obviously knew about Sasuke. Despite what I'd told Kiba, I'd actually known for awhile that he knew. It's not like I was going to tell anyone, since it was his decision, but it made me feel horrible to find that tall, way-too-energetic-for-my-liking body getting thinner and paler. The old Naruto was dying inside him and I couldn't do anything but watch.
I pulled the puppy out and she stared around, eyes wide and taking everything in. As soon as he realized it wasn't a stuffed animal, Naruto came over and cooed at her, tickling her little chubby belly, the white and black splotches dark against his startlingly thin fingers.
"For Kiba's Christmas present?" he glanced up but quickly looked back at her, not able to hold my eyes.
Biting back a sigh, I nodded and muttered, "Yeah, since his mom took Akamaru for a year. I can't…won't play fetch and run with him, and he needs that sometimes. So…" I trailed off and he nodded, understanding clear in his eyes. And with that, the topics available for discussion had fallen to zero.
We both stared at the girl for a few more seconds before Naruto turning away and saying too-cheerfully, "Well I better get to breakfast or the pancakes will be gone."
As I stood there and watched him leave, I wished harder that I could help, and with only a little imagining, a tall shadow was right beside the blonde, holding his hand and leaning slightly toward him as he spoke, black as night eyes attentive and completely relaxed.
When he spoke, the blonde's whole body lit up and paid absolute attention to every word, hair falling into his face and wiped away by long, pale fingers.
Ironically, I had been Sasuke's friend for much longer than everyone else, and I was the calmest one.
Naruto was torn to shreds that were too destroyed for anyone to piece them back together and small enough for him to sweep under the rug, pretending everything was fine. Neji and Gaara were keeping mainly to themselves, and Sakura was silent when he was brought up, avoiding everyone's eyes. Her crush hadn't lasted long, but for awhile she'd loved him and then been one of his best friends.
Kiba had cried for hours over it and Kakashi had utterly retreated from us all for a long time, coaxed back out my Iruka. The younger man was shockingly calm too, and I think he was just thinking, 'He's not gone. He's just away right now.'
What about me?
The one who'd known the raven since elementary school?
The one who'd shared a bedroom with him when his parents were killed?
The one who heard everything from when he cried in his sleep to his confession about Naruto?
Well…I was just…optimistic.
I honestly didn't believe that he was gone for good. It was just a matter of time before he'd walk through those doors and called me a lazy ass again. That, I was completely confidant in.
Walking to the elevator, I went down to the parking lot and set the pup down on the thick uncut grass, watching her stumble around and roll in the weeds, doing everything except what she was supposed to, which was go to the bathroom before we had to leave. Sighing, I looked around and caught myself staring at the empty parking space at the back of the lot.
But shoving that back down, I glanced back at the little girl, glaring at her sweet little face as she panted up at me, the picture of innocence. Bending to pick her up, a solid weight plowed into me and I cursed violently, twisting so I landing right beside her instead of on top of her and yelled at Kiba, "Watch it, mutt! Don't squish her!"
He just laughed, sprawled beside me on the ground and holding his stomach.
"We need to name her," I muttered as she cuddled up and licked me with her sticky, tiny little black and pink tongue, puppy breath blowing over my skin. Kiba finally quit laughing and poked me.
"Chīsana shōjo. Little girl. Chīsa for short. Good?"
"Agreed. Now…oh no." I was staring at my watch. I was late.
Hopping up quicker than I would usually make my body move, I pushed the puppy into Ki8ba's arms and shoved them into the passenger seat, buckling them in and hurrying around to the other side. Swerving onto the road I drove downtown and screeched around a few blocks, halting in front of a huge warehouse with a big pink flyer outside.
That's the signal, I thought and pulled over, almost kicking Kiba out and pulling Chīsa away from him and putting her on the floorboard so I could focus on getting to the airport before Sakura.
Driving back past the school, I caught Naruto walking down the front steps in his jogging shirt and sweats, stacking it on another in the back of his black jeep and heading to the front, pulling smoothly out in the other direction, on his way to the warehouse.
I watched it drive away until I couldn't even see him anymore, and I slowly turned the blinker on, heading again for the airport and running up the steps just before Sakura's black Volvo pulled into the lot.
Juura and Stone waved at me from the window, the Twins arguing over something with Noir behind them. Temari was lugging a big bag and Kankuro had a mystery box on a trolley. Oh Gaara would just love this; they hadn't called as far as I knew and apparently this was the week they were staying. We'd all been unsuspectingly recruited by our pink-haired Master and she was going to make us work for it.
Grinning wickedly, Temari loaded the bag into my trunk and latched the box down beside it, something inside clinking lightly. I eyed it and pulled out some blankets, wrapping the box up and pushing the rest of the baggage into the backseat on-top of everyone else.
We buckled up and I gently drove onto the highway, cruising back through town and to the outskirts where the college was, the huge green lawn frozen over with leftover dew from the morning. It crunched under our feet and big black stones that built the school sign holding up a deep, hard-weathered cherry wood block where the old words gleamed in the early sunlight, spelling out, "Konoha Private College" in soft white lettering.
The school itself was relatively new, remodeled and only fifty years old, but the sign was from before the restructuring, and had been there since the town built the old school in 1926. And hauling a car-load of gaping teens wasn't easy when going up old stone block steps that lead around and into a side door, closer to the elevator than the front was.
"Come on, Shika!" Sakura called and grunted, her thick combat boots slapping on the concrete far ahead, steel toes clacking as she hurried to the door, breath visible and leaving a thin trail behind her.
Juura was even father back than I was, and we looked like lazy ducklings, traipsing along, talking the whole way. Stone and Noir were right in front of me, muttering about something I could've hear but decided not to. All in all, it was a good morning.
The air was sharp and cold and I unlocked my door once I got caught up to Sakura, her piling boxes outside and trying to divide who should go where. I took in the Twins, Noir and Temari stolen away by Sakura, and Stone and Kankuro went to Neji and Gaara.
That left Juura for Naruto, and she dug under the flip of the big red rug right in front of his door, coming up with the spare he'd-apparently- hidden there.
I stared at her.
She just shrugged and hauled her bags inside, shutting the pale blue door, paint barely chipped at all, behind her.
Glancing down the hall, I realized that it was the wrong door. She shouldn't…oh.
Guilt burned into my stomach and I winced inside, letting the two redheads blather on while I stared at the thick, dark blue-black door with the handle worn out and the paint around the edges well-chipped and weary.
The floor in front of it was scuffed and dirty from well-use, and the wall was notched from numerous adventures. Shadows haunted the doorway, though.
One particular one was telling me to piss off, leaning on the door frame and smirking sardonically like always. The other was grinning and flicking the taller one on the side of the head, telling him to be nice and entwining it's fingers with longer ones. They smiled at me and at each other, and vanished as Kam shook me, asking where to put their stuff.
Grief hung over me for a moment, but I pushed it away again and answered, going on with life like I'd always done. Everything changes, I thought and somehow knew I'd see the pain in the butt again someday, a tiny flare of hope still expecting that sarcastic comment at the end of every other sentence. Oh-this wasn't over. Not even close.
Gaara POV (later)
I glared at the woman across from me, the same thought going through both eyes at the same time-MINE! I lunged and heaved the last Jumbo Box of macaroni 'n cheese from the bin, tossing it in the cart and fleeing before she could grab it back. Neji ran up and threw in a couple boxes of cookies, Kankuro pushing bags of chips and bottles of soda into his own cart, pulling out a roast chicken and putting it on top, cans of beer clinking at the bottom tray. Since he was the only one over 21 he had to haul the liquor and buy it himself.
I shivered and could feel the slimy eyes of every baggage girl on my ass as I walked down the aisle to the pastry section, hackles rising as some changed to Neji's.
I quickly pecked him on the cheek and wrapped an arm around him possessively, pulling him into me. He just grinned and kissed me back, leaning into my touch. Warmth spread through me and I smiled, leaning back gently.
All three baskets were almost full and Kankuro piled in another couple wines, vodka and jell-o mixes at the bottom, rum alphabetized. Chips and pretzels and cookies were all stuffed around them as padding, cupcakes in the front, plastic protecting the green and red sprinkles. Christmas-cy.
Carefully, I grabbed some brownie mix and Neji piled real food in his own basket, the Christmas dinner entrusted to us as well as party food.
Everyone had been shocked to discover we could cook, not that I could see why. The quality is just as hot to gay guys as chicks, you know. So we'd been elected the chefs and took it very seriously, getting turkey and ham and stuffing stuffs, cobbler makings in a bag beside the Christmas cake we'd gotten, ice cream in sealed brown bags to keep them chilled.
We were so saving Christmas. Hahaha. MWAHAHAAHAHAHAHHAAAA!
I turn, almost asking Naruto what he wants, before remembering in the midst of all the happiness of Neji's hand in mine that he isn't with us. And remembering why. The weight presses on me and I sigh, face as inscrutable as always, a mask of calm.
Neji squeezes my hand though, and I realize he's noticed too. That Naruto has been acting odd for a long time. Only I don't tell him what I can see behind all the forced smiles and grins. The pain that's stretching at his skin and pulling taut in agony. Pity tugs at my gut and I hate that I can't help, startled at realizing I want to.
This is so new for me; to feel what everyone else does so sharply. For a long time, I felt nothing but emptiness, but now I can sense when others are in pain or sad and upset.
I'm not sure I like it at all.
But it is interesting and I'm definitely getting used to it by now, trying to ignore the hurt echoing from his skin whenever he's in close range. It doesn't make it easier to know that Sasuke isn't dead-that he's still breathing, and maybe even coming home someday.
However, from what I can see, he's as good as dead to Naruto.
Has nobody else realized that the blonde doesn't ever ask about Sasuke and how he is? When he's coming back? That he can't even say his name? Maybe not.
But I'm not good enough at reading people to know for sure. Shika knows, though, just like me, and Kakashi does too. That I know only because I saw his face when we got back that day and he wouldn't open the door to Naruto's room. The blonde lied, like usual.
Kankuro pulled his basket up and declared, "Booze is good! Chips are good! Drinks are good! Cookies are good! And I even grabbed some pillows for the eventual pass out." He grinned at us before noticing the sudden drop in happiness, frowning suspiciously.
"What happened? Did I say something wrong? You don't want the pillows? Because we don't have to have them, but It'll be easier than everyone bringing their own, right? I guess-"
"No, the pillows are fine," Neji interrupted him and I buried the weight on my chest under layers of my old chill, trying to block the burning sadness from swallowing me again. Instead, I grabbed another pack of Tostitos for the party and Neji pulled a couple pie crusts from a freezer, piling them on the mixings.
Kankuro let the awkward silence die and asked like nothing had happened, "So what candy do you guys want? I'm thinking chocolate. That fine?"
After we finished, and the chattering dropped a little, Neji squeezed my hand again and murmured so soft I'm not sure he really spoke, "It'll be okay, Gaara."
Sakura POV (that night)
Something was wrong. I couldn't put my finger right on it, but it was tickling my nerves and wringing out my conscious like a brutal pair of hands. Naruto put another decoration up and mouthed the words to the song playing, eyes blank and unfocused, a little sad part the lyrics I could see him thinking about.
Yeah something was really, really wrong. But what was it? Squinting at him, I tugged my sweats lower over my ankles and pulled the fabric of my-regrettably short-sleeved-shirt closer around my arms, goose-bumps pricking at my skin and the wind from outside making my breath small puffs of air, swirling around me.
The blonde climbed down the ladder and offered me the star, grinning a too-big, painful grin, scars taut and blurred.
Smiling back softly, I took the big silver, aluminum piece and carefully climbed up, tying it on the tree with a small string of tinsel, making sure to secure it to the top branch too. The Christmas lights under it blinked on as I went back down, shining up at the star and refracting a hundred different ways off its multilayered, crinkly surface.
Glancing at Naruto, I saw tears glinting against crystal blue and looked at him full on, the thin film of moisture disappearing as he turned to look back at me. My heart hurt and I sighed, a smile igniting as he smiled the first real smile he had in ages. But after we'd started to hang the banners, swinging low over the warehouse rafters (more like a barn than a real warehouse) I noticed the grief in the smile, the absolute sadness in his step.
His straight back was rigid, and the smile was plastic, painted on like a pretty picture, white canvas under the surface.
(later)
"Why does he always try to do everything alone? You know, he did this when he thought we were all mad at him for losing our dorm keys last year, and when he heard me and Shika arguing about who had to drive him to work. He's just too happy in the mornings. We just weren't morning people. But damned if that made sense to Naruto." I sighed heavily, feeling the fabric of a dress, possible gift for Temari, as Juura shrugs, eyes unreadable with her thick mane of blonde-blue hair pulled back in a short ponytail.
Her gloves have the fingers cut off and her nails are shiny gold to match her eye shadow and mascara, Christmas lights blinking on the tips of the reindeer antlers she's wearing.
Her green jacket has black buttons and the shirt under it has a big Rudolf on it, the cartoon one that shows in the Christmas specials every year. Her pants are dull black too, with paint on them in the vague shape of light bulbs, green and gold and red and silver.
We're in the women's section of the clothes store, sparkly tights and Mary-Jane slippers piled in a bin, tied together and stuffed down under sandals and heels. She digs a dull silver pair out, red threaded through gold ruffles on the sides, and tries them on, completing her Christmas outfit. I coo and mutter, "Those are perfect! You should get them since they're on sale. Only five bucks."
Still quiet from my question, she sighs and nods, adding them to a growing pile of clothes picked out for us. Deciding, I pull the slip of a dress off and grab a pair of grey tights, putting them in a bag labeled 'TEMARI', and quickly adding a blue pair of slippers from the bin.
"Juura?" I look at her straight, the uncomfortable question still hanging in the air like a corpse nobody wants to notice. But instead of answering me, she points at something behind me and says, "Try that on. It's too perfect for you not to."
I turned to look up at the slinky silver dress on the wall.
Picking it out of the mess, I held it up and frowned. Now why did it have to be the perfect size? No way I could fight it, and reluctantly let her out of it while I slipped into a room and tried it on, the cool fabric falling down like a waterfall over smooth rocks, cool rushing into my skin. Shivering, I looked at the full-length mirror.
She came in and gaped, quietly coming up and letting my hair down, the dark pink plaits falling around my face. Combing it with her fingers, she sighed wistfully, "Now if only you had a damn date."
"Hell, I don't have to have a man to have some fun!" I wriggled and my boobs shook, making both of us laugh. After that we checked out and hauled the many, many bags to the trunk, Noir snoozing in the back since she'd left half-way through, only buying a few shirts for Stone and a bracelet for herself.
We pulled into the empty space at WalMart a few minutes later, sitting under the deep shade of a low hanging tree, and I sighed, running my hands gently over the steering wheel, mind tired and sad.
"Hey Juura?" I felt her gaze flick to me, and I almost lost my nerve, her sharp eyes focused on me warily, like she knew what I was about to say. Noir was asleep in the back, her dark skin buried under a light grey jacket, purple in her shiny hair gleaming dully in the low light. Her back was to us, and her was breathing was slow and rhythmic smooth as she slept. The waves of sleek hair was tied in a red bandanna and I sighed.
The blonde softly murmured, "Sakura...I'm not going to talk about this behind Naruto's back. If you want to talk to him, and can't do it alone, I'll be right there with you. But I won't plot about fixing something he doesn't want to admit is broken. Sorry." Her phone buzzed and she stepped out, answering it, window rolled down so I could hear her.
"Hey Stone. No, we just got here. Yeah. Row 5. Kay. Sure. No, I wanna come in and take a look around. Damn straight! Okay, see you there. Ciao!"
She clicked it shut, and silence fell again, me looking down at my slightly shaking hands.
"I just...I don't know what to say to him."
Tears pricked my eyes and I swallowed a thick burning in my throat. It was true. Ever since we'd gotten back, I just didn't know what to say. I was never a very good person to turn to if you needed comforting, but now when I'd look at Naruto my neck would burn with shame.
All this time and I had no words for him. No hugs or looks that promised I'd be there for him. Nothing significant.
"I can't help with that either, Sakura. All I can say is don't try to push to hard. He may try so hard to be strong, but he's so sad and small right now, compared to what he could be...he...he couldn't take it."
We were quiet, and suddenly Noir spoke, making me jump.
"You give him so little credit."
"I give Naruto plenty of credit! I just don't see why he-" I started, but she shook her head, waving me off.
"Not him. Sasuke. You people have honestly no faith in him, do you? I mean, it's not like he's dead. You can't just act like he is, because that's just asking for bad things to happen." She sighed.
"If you don't believe in him, how is Naruto supposed to? When all of you act like nothing's wrong, or that there's nothing you can do-you're just letting him get farther and farther away. You're letting him die without a fight."
"Without a fight? What the hell do you think all that in America was-"
"Exactly. So why are all of you giving up now? You're so close." That was Juura, and she had a hand white-knuckled on the car door, looking at me hard.
"How can I-"
"It isn't about you, Sakura. It's about them. About everyone keeps trying to help him, but the only thing hurting him is he's broken. In half."
I sighed, understanding slowly filling my up, reassurance making me dry-eyed. Maybe it wouldn't be okay today, or tomorrow, or even a long time from now. But eventually, it would work out for the best.
Maybe this was all a little melodramatic to someone else, but I couldn't help nodding gently, peace settling over me. Instead of saying anything, I got out and nodded again, declaring, "Let us shop!"
And without another word, they both followed me into the store, leaving the uncomfortable topic to rest.
Hinata POV
I screwed up my face and groaned, slapping the stupid boombox and glaring at it. Idiot thing. It kept skipping on the CD, and nobody could get it to work right. Sighing, Temari just scowled and waved her hands around, "Leave it, Hinata. We'll just get find a different one. I'm sure someone's got one we can use. Maybe-"
"No-this damn thing is going to work right!" I kicked it and it meekly started up a low buzz, like it was pleading with me. 'sorry-I'm-pathetic-and-can't-play-any-CDs'.
Unbelievable. My stress level is off the charts, I haven't been laid in eight months, and now the guy I've had a crush on since second freaking grade is shutting me out. STUPID FUCKING CD PLAYER!
"You okay, hon?" Temari touched my shoulder gently, and I jumped, flushing in frustration; I was letting this get to me a little too much.
I groaned and sat down, ignoring Temari staring at me. But in a moment, Naruto walked back inside and delivered a box of mixes, not noticing the look on her face.
"Here, guys." He went around and put it on a bench, leaving us for the tree, since Sakura had come back to decorate and make sure we had everything we needed. Sighing again, I pushed the lump of thick emotion down and nodded absently, getting the spare player from my car and plugging it in, inserting a CD. Immediately, a slow soft song began to play, and a woman sang in a sad alto.
There's so much life I've left to live and this fire's burning still
When I watch you look at me, I think I could find the will
To stand for every dream and forsake the solid ground
And give up this fear within of what would happen if they ever knew
I'm in lo-
Naruto, looking stricken, came over, and gently removed the disc
"Not that one. Sorry. Must have been in the wrong box."
"S-sure."
He didn't look at us and I bit my lip, ears burning, waiting and plugging another one in. Completely different, it hopped around and jumped through my head achingly fast, like it was saying everything in one too-small breath.
Later, as we made the final selections, I helped Temari and the others sort the food out, Kankuro saying that the real food would be here soon so save the snacks for later. Standing back and watching everyone, I sighed deeply, trying to push everything out in one breath.
"That's one big sigh," Sakura and Juura sat down on the couch we'd hauled over a few days ago. It's upholstery was lacking, but it was cushy and soft...and smelled like coffee and vanilla wafers, for some reason.
"Yeah. I guess," I said slowly. Glancing at Naruto, I felt pink cheeks turn pink, looking again at my swishing blue soda, the loopy straw off to one side as I gently swayed to the beat. It wasn't even that I really had a crush on him anymore. He was just one of the only people who treated me like everyone else. Even Neji acted a little like I was a little kid. I guess that was fine mostly, since I was the youngest of the group at seventeen.
I just hated that after going so far and wide out and starting to gain confidence, everything melted away for a guy who would never love me the way I loved him. I wasn't pining, by any means, but I was conscious of loving him, at the very least. It wasn't as bad as it had been, where I'd flame up just from seeing him, but I'd still blush when he talked to me and I despised that weak part of myself.
I could never have him, and in reality, I didn't want him. I wanted the idea of someone liking me-and maybe eventually loving me-because I was a strong equal, instead of because I was rich of a little shy blushing princess with fair hair and pale skin.
The heiress of a billion dollar company, or a small framed, white-eyed girl who couldn't talk without stuttering, the blonde treated me the same. Funny, in a way, because it was the same for him. He didn't want to be better, but nobody outside our circle treated him human, and he just wanted what I did. To be the same as everyone else, and be accepted.
"So..?" Juura prodded, sipping a wine cooler and staring at the huge, lit up tree we'd finished earlier.
"He won't talk to me...or anyone, for that matter. Not really. Is he alright, or is he getting too lonely?" Something indistinct passed between the blonde and the pinkette, but I said nothing, patient as their eyes meet quickly.
"He'll be okay eventually. He's just...adjusting. Like we all are," she added after a second, not looking at me.
"Liar," I murmured, and they didn't say anything, not knowing how to react except to accept the fact that I was right.
"Any more news?" Juura said softly, and I sighed.
"Neji said they called for the daily update and said it must have been a fluke, since he hasn't shown any other signs of improvement. But he's still taking the nutrients easily and hasn't deteriorated much. They still can't say, though,'' I finally said, knowing what Juura really wondered.
"Hey guys! Isn't this a party? Who died?" Kam cranked up the music and Stone swung Noir onto the cleared space for dancing, swirling her and tipping her almost upside down, her loud laugh ringing clear in the beat.
Then, exaggerating their movements, both Twins came and bowed to Juura and Sakura, manes of matching clown red hair brushing the ground, arms sweeping in wide arcs. The women looked at each other and busted out in giggles, accepting with their own exaggerated curties.
"May-"
"I have-"
"This-"
"Dance?"
I snorted on my wine and coughed, laughing as the girls each grabbed each other's twin and twirled them, dipping them in sync and guffawing as they tried valiantly not to step on their feet.
As the music sped up, I looked around, spotting Naruto next to the big double doors. He had keys in his hands, watching the scene with a half-smile, eyes narrowed and sharply dulled in grief.
I said nothing, watching him from across the room, and feeling my heart reach out to him. I didn't want to kiss him and make him feel better. I couldn't have even if I'd wanted to, because I didn't have the right. I hadn't bother earning it. Instead, all I wanted was for him not to be so sad.
I felt eyes on me and glanced around, seeing Gaara meeting me across the wide cement floor, the lights not reaching his dark foamy green eyes, crimson hair like a blotch of blood around his pale face. He didn't look angry, or anything, but his eyes held a deep sorrow. Not for himself, but for the blonde, as we both turned to look at him,silent watchers as he smiled one last time, bright disco lights shining against the wet streaks on his face.
But he wasn't crying as he left, just holding that one CD and quietly opening and shutting the huge doors. Nobody noticed him go but us, and I felt a yawning crevasse of hurt trip me up unexpectedly, like the last step on a staircase, making my hands tighten on my wine.
I wasn't mad, but numb.
The sky outside was empty and void. It was the new moon, and I suddenly feared that the black would eat the world whole, no sun willing itself to rise tomorrow, and face the world the moon had left behind.
I hope you guys understood that last bit:') I worked for awhile on it and tried my best since its leading to a big event! CLUE~