The Terminus Systems were by definition those parts of the galaxy that were explored, but not under control of the Citadel. The name covered a fairly coherent territory making up roughly a third of the galaxy. By and large it was an anarchic region, without a central government, or in fact many legitimate governments at all. The main powers inside it were raiders and pirates, who subsided on raids into Citadel territory and on stealing from each other. Conflicts between those powers were frequent, yet they all agreed on one thing: To keep the Council out.
Citadel ships or ships of Citadel powers were not welcome in the Terminus Systems, and even old enemies could band together very quickly to throw them out. That was what the turian Councillor had been so concerned about in the discussion on how to deal with Saren: A concerted Citadel military action near the borders of the Terminus Systems could steer the local warlords up enough for them to band together and start a galactic war.
Yet, not all parts of the Terminus were the same. Some had seen in their history a regular presence of Citadel troops or at least Citadel representatives. The cluster known to humanity as Sentry Omega was one such example. For centuries it had been the border between Citadel Space and the Terminus Systems, and a fairly important border at that: Even though it had taken human efforts to colonize the Attican Traverse, the Citadel had managed for generations before to keep the region free of the Terminus warlords, not because they were interested in the area, but rather to keep the power of the Terminus Systems low.
As part of those efforts there had been several attempts to colonize the planet of Virmire, Sentry Omega's only garden world. Those efforts had always failed due to the political instability of the Terminus, but even so, a periodical Citadel presence was considered normal in this Cluster. It would not be as problematic as a journey to just about any other point in the Terminus.
Shepard was glad about that. For one, it would make his mission on Virmire that much easier. And second, that mission would allow him to be in the Terminus, outside of Citadel space, for some time. To lay low while the newest scandal made public by him was hitting the Alliance. He had imprisoned MP Burns, Chairman of the Subcommittee on Transhuman Studies, to gain access to all the classified files on BAaT - and then had used asari media to make those files public. He had let the entire galaxy see the crimes committed as part of that program..
No doubt the Alliance would want his head for that. At least metaphorically spoken. They could not try him, since as Spectre he was above the law. They could kick him out of the Navy and take the Normandy from him, though. They could generally make his life and his mission a hassle. So he was quite content with doing a mission in the Terminus for now, far away from the Alliance.
A salarian Special Tactics Groups regiment on Virmire had discovered a large facility that belonged to Saren there, but the call they had made to the Council had been incomplete. The Council in turn had relayed that information to Shepard, and so the Normandy had entered the cluster. In fact, she already had made a fly-by of the planet under full stealth, to gather data. Currently, the ship was hiding in orbit of Cloroplon, a small gas giant of Virmire's system. Shepard had called together the ship's officers in the conference room, plus Tali as resident geth expert. Lieutenant Moreau, known as Joker, was present via the ship's communication system.
Shepard's rogue actions had caused some tensions on the ship. Especially Navigator Pressly, the XO, very much disagreed with them, and Shepard knew others were discontent as well. This had so far not influenced the functionality of the ship; everybody still behaved perfectly professional. But it had led to a stiff and uncomfortable atmosphere on board.
Shepard cleared his mind of that thought. He knew everybody would do their job, and he had a conference to focus on.
The holographic terminal in the conference room displayed a map of the area around Saren's base. It was a coastal region full of rocks, cliffs and saltwater canyons which often seemed to be the only accessible paths there. This had made it easy for the ex-Spectre to surround its facility proper with a wide zone of defences, which included outposts, gatehouses and anti-air towers. There had also been weaker signals from the region. Most likely those were the salarians, and it appeared they had become stranded within the security zone.
"If that's true," Pressly commented, "then they must be in a constant siege situation."
"They need help as soon as possible," Shepard agreed.
"But if we just tried to land the AA towers would shred us to pieces," Engineer Adams pointed out.
"Yes," Shepard agreed. "But land we must, if only to get them out. And our primary objective is contacting them anyway. So we need to punch a hole through the security zone."
Joker's voice came through the comm system: "I could fly the ship below the radar and drop a ground team. It wouldn't be the first time you've defeated masses of geth."
Pressly narrowed his eyes and pointed to a point on the map. "If the Normandy were to fly this way, there would only be two towers to disable. It's possible."
"Yeah, but I think you make this more complicated as it is," Shepard said, "Those are anti-air guns, not anti-space guns. There is no such thing. So, why not let the Normandy take them out?"
"Per space bombardment?" Pressly asked stiffly.
"Why not?" Shepard argued. "We need to get to the salarians to find out what has happened, and we need to destroy that base. And so far, the Normandy hasn't been detected. So I say, the ship punches us a way through to the salarians, we evacuate them, and then we pound the base into dust from orbit."
"So far, every time the Normandy has engaged geth ships, stealth has held," Tali commented. "So it would be possible - we could attack anything on the ground under the cover of stealth. But perhaps it would be a bit... unsubtle."
"You've ordered orbital strikes before," Pressly conceded, "but this is different. Virmire is a garden world. Per Citadel law, orbital bombardments of garden worlds are forbidden."
"We're not inside Citadel jurisdiction, though," Shepard argued, "and I don't know why I should endanger my men only in order not to fire on an uninhabited planet."
"There is one reason, Commander," Kaidan pointed out. "Starting an orbital bombardment would alert any geth forces in the system to us. That's the problem with unsubtle methods."
"To be fair, so would destroying the AA towers from the ground, too, though", Adams disagreed.
"I think there's a difference in grade," Kaidan argued. "Besides it would tell our enemies that we have in fact a warship with us. Maybe we should try to keep this fact hidden as long as we can."
"That's a good point, Lieutenant," Shepard conceded. "However, if we strike hard and fast it shouldn't be a problem. As said, the next steps would be evacuating the salarians and bombing the base."
"Ideally, yes," Kaidan agreed, "but you know what they say: No plan survives the first contact with the enemy."
"That's true for the alternative as well, though," Shepard pointed out. "A below-radar fly-in from the Normandy, a Mako drop at just the right position, and then the fight through the defences... at least with a bombardment from space we know those defences will be gone."
"So what do you suggest, sir?" Pressly asked.
"Draw up fire solutions for a mobile, far distance bombardment of those two AA towers," Shepard answered. "Keeping the Normandy hidden under stealth has absolute priority. Once that's done, we'll fly to the planet under maximum acceleration, and quickly drop the ground team - that is, the marine detachment, my Spectre entourage and me. And then the Normandy will leave again and hide behind Virmire's moon, to be called whenever we need her. Which most likely would be the evacuation. But minimizing the risk of her being caught pinned down on the ground is another high priority."
"A hard and fast strike, instead of a subtle and elegant maneuver," Kaidan commented grinning, "Well, I'm sure Chief Williams will like this, at least."
"Any more questions or objections?" Shepard asked.
"No, sir," Pressly announced, even though his posture and voice made it clear he was not all too happy about the plan. Joker, Tali and Adams all remained silent.
"Very well," Shepard concluded the conference. "Pressly, work out those fire solutions. Alenko, prepare the marines and have them waiting in the cargo bay. Tali, do the same with Garrus, Liara and Wrex. Adams, prepare Engineering for combat conditions. And Joker, get the ship into position."
A chorus of 'aye-ayes' answered him.
…
The Normandy came to a halt just about a metre over Virmire's coastal waters, only some dozens meter away from the salarians. Already during the descent the cargo bay's hatch had been opened, and now Shepard, his Spectre entourage and the ship's regular marines were jumping outside, into the ankle-deep water.
The scenery in front of them was breath-taking. The water glistered in sun light, and lush green vegetation grew on the nearby cliffs, and on several large rocks standing isolated among the ocean water. A sand beach directly in front of them made the picture complete. If this planet were inhabited it would have a hell of a tourism industry. As it was, though, the beach was used otherwise: The salarians had built up their camp there.
Shepard was among the first to move out, and he saw that their arrival had thrown the salarians into utter confusion. There had been no possibility to contact them without breaking stealth, so it was only natural that the STG regiment now feared the worst. They were hastily gathering and moving out from the camp to encounter the new arrivals. Shepard waved some of his men to come with him, and walked to meet the salarians. Behind him, the Mako was unloaded, as the last item from the ship, and afterward, the Normandy shot up into the air again.
Tali, Wrex, Kaidan and a further marine were behind the Commander as he reached the STG - whose members were now standing in formation, had their weapons drawn and were aiming at them. In front of them stood a slender, green-skinned and white-armoured man.
"I'm Captain Kirrahe, 3rd Infiltration Regiment STG," he announced himself. "Identify yourself."
"Commander Jonathan Shepard, Systems Alliance and Special Tactics and Reconnaissance branch of the Council," Shepard replied, "I'm here to investigate your status."
The salarians put down and sheathed their weapons, but Kirrahe did not seem very happy. "Investigate? That's a repetition of our task. And not a very good one, either. Are you responsible for the destruction of the nearby geth facilities?"
"That is correct," Shepard answered.
"You have used orbital bombardment on a garden world?" Kirrahe asked, "Even a Spectre might find he's not entirely above most basic Citadel laws."
"We're outside the Citadel's jurisdiction," Shepard pointed out, "This planet has no inhabitants. Yet I'm to risk my men's lives just so it doesn't get a scratch?"
"Your simplistic approach to warfare has every AA tower in a radius of fifteen kilometres alerted to your presence!" Kirrahe protested.
"That just means we need to act fast," Shepard replied. "The Normandy can return at a minute's notice and evacuate us all."
"We can't leave," Kirrahe claimed, "We have to wait for Council reinforcements."
"We are the reinforcements," Kaidan spoke up.
"What?" Kirrahe exclaimed. "You're all they sent? I told the Council to send a fleet!"
"Unfortunately, your signal was damaged," Shepard explained. "That's why we were sent in to investigate."
"I lost half my men investigating this place," Kirrahe claimed. "What needs to be done now is to destroy it."
"That would be the next step in my plan," Shepard explained, "Ask you about the status, evacuate you, bomb the base to dust." He could not quite suppress a cocky grin from appearing on his face. Probably things would not go so easy, but he had to admit, it felt great saying such a sentence.
"Another orbital bombardment?" Kirrahe asked. "I cannot stand for that. There must be alternate solutions. If you're all the Council has sent, then I need some time to figure out a plan, but I do think there needs to be a second option besides what you've proposed, Commander."
"I'll listen to it, of course," Shepard promised, "In the meantime, tell me, what's your status. What have you found out?"
"We've discovered Saren's base of operation," Kirrahe explained, "He's set up a research facility here, but it's crawling with geth and very well fortified."
"Research?" Shepard asked, "What could Saren be researching?"
"A very dangerous subject," Kirrahe claimed, "He's using the base to breed an army of krogan."
What? But that's impossible, the krogan... - However, Wrex reacted quicker than Shepard. He walked some steps forward and asked: "How is that possible?"
Unfazed by the krogan battlemaster in front of him, Kirrahe went on: "Apparently, Saren has discovered a cure for the genophage."
"A cure for the genophage?" Shepard echoed, "That's... well, that's something historical. Big news." This goes further than just Saren. He really did not know what else to say.
"Unfortunately, it would also make Saren nearly unstoppable," Kirrahe pointed out, "His geth are already bad enough. If he also gets an endless supply of krogan, then his forces will be next to invincible. This base and all of its secrets must be destroyed."
"Destroyed? I don't think so," Wrex disagreed. Shepard knew the krogan had to be highly agitated at the news, but outwardly he appeared totally calm. At least so far. "Our people are dying. This cure can save them."
"If that cure leaves the planet, the krogan will become unstoppable," Kirrahe argued. "We can't make the same mistake again."
Taking some further steps forwards, Wrex came to a halt directly in front of Kirrahe and pointed his finger at him. "We're not a mistake!" he announced angrily and walked off.
Kirrahe watched him leave without comment, still unfazed even after having had an organic warmachine right in his face, and then turned to Shepard again and asked. "Is he going to be a problem? We already have enough angry krogan to deal with."
"What do you expect?" Shepard asked. "Krogan numbers have been dwindling for centuries due to that marvelous salarian invention, the genophage. That issue is the most important thing in the galaxy for his people."
"I'm well aware of the krogan issue, Commander Shepard," Kirrahe answered stiffly, "I'm worrying about the safety of our mission here. Everything else is secondary right now."
"I already told you my proposal for concluding the mission", Shepard pointed out. He was not entirely sure about it anymore, though. If the facility truly does have a cure of the genophage, a salvation for the krogan people...
"And I'm still not content with it," Kirrahe argued. "Let me come up with a counter-proposal. In the meantime, why don't you go talk to your krogan friend. Your men can make themselves at home in the camp."
Shepard shrugged and nodded agreement. Without a further word, the salarians turned and returned to the camp that was only some few meters behind them, followed by most of Shepard's men. Said camp was not much - just some tents along a shoreline. It were stable looking high-tech tents, though, and Shepard had no doubt people could make themselves comfortably at home in them for at least a limited amount of time.
He began walking towards Wrex. Worldlessly, Tali followed him. He did not protest, as he certainly did not mind her presence. Recently, when talking to the quarian Ashley's words had echoed through his minds. The Gunnery Chief had stated her surprise at Shepard's plain acceptance that a relationship with Tali could never work. According to Ashley, simply accepting bad things as a fact was not at all like him. Ever since then, Shepard had felt like a coward for not bringing up the subject of their emotions to Tali. So far he had not, and now an important mission and an angry krogan were in front of them.
The beach area where the Normandy had landed was typical for this region of the planet, according to what the ship's sensors had gathered. Land and ocean blurred into each other here. The ocean was shallow everywhere where it met the coast, and everywhere large rocks and cliffs loomed over it. Around Saren's base, the ocean even formed veritable canyons among the cliffs, and those were in fact often the only way to move through the area at all, which allowed the geth to secure them with gatehouses and other outposts.
However, looking at the scenery, it was nearly inconceivable that it should be used for such martial aims. With the sun illuminating the coastal area the surroundings appeared completely serene, a painting of blue, yellow, green, grey and white. Too bad the Council never managed to get this planet settled Shepard thought as he approached the krogan.
It took some time until Wrex noticed the human and the quarian. When he did, he turned towards them and said: "This isn't right, Shepard. If there's a cure for the genophage, we can't destroy it."
"We can't let Saren have it, either, though," Shepard argued. "You know what he stands for. Let him win, and the krogan won't be around long enough to enjoy the cure."
"That's a chance we should be willing to take!" Wrex disagreed, "This is the fate of my entire people we're talking about!"
"I understand that, Wrex," Shepard said. "I'm not saying we should destroy the cure. I'm just saying we can't let Saren have it."
"The salarians will accept no alternative to the utter destruction of the cure," Wrex pointed out.
"The salarians are not in command," Shepard replied, "Not really. I have the ship, the crew, the means, not them. I'm in command."
"And you would give the krogan a cure for the genophage?" Wrex asked. "I've been loyal to you so far. Hell, you did more for me than my family ever did. But this is too important, I need to be sure about it."
"No," Shepard admitted. "Kirrahe is right on one thing: If the genophage were cured now, there would instantly be war again. I know it, you know it. What do you think will happen if news of that cure were to spread on your homeworld?"
"Chaos," Wrex answered, "Centuries of suppressed hate against the galaxy being released. I know what follies my people are capable of. I've seen them. You've made your point Shepard. But what would you do instead?"
"It would still be a crime to destroy the cure," Shepard insisted, "It's somewhere in that base, and we have to get it."
"You would really go behind the salarians and secure the cure?" Wrex asked.
"Yes," Shepard confirmed. Why can't anything be easy any more? Again he would act against allies. However, destroying that cure would be a crime. The krogan were dying, the fate of an entire species was at stake here. "And once it can be given to your people without risking to start round two of the krogan wars, then it should be done."
"I'm not sure that can ever be reached," Wrex said, "but if the reward is getting free of the genophage, it might just be worth fighting for regardless. But that only works if we can save that cure."
"Well, so much for my plans for an orbital bombardment," Shepard commented with a lopsided grin. "It seems we have to enter the base." He became utterly serious again: "However, first priority must still be denying that cure to Saren. Even if it means, in the worst case scenario, that it gets destroyed."
Wrex immediately became suspicious again. "And who decides what the worst case scenario is? The salarians?"
"Wrex, if Saren has the cure he can use it to enslave your people!" Shepard argued. "And you know he'd just be using you as tools. Just as the Council has, and look how that ended. You'd be used again. Is that what you want?"
Wrex remained silent for a long while. Shepard did not push him. Finally the krogan said: "No. We were tools for the Council once. To thank us for wiping out the rachni, they neutered us all. I doubt Saren would be so generous." He straightened himself. "You're right, denying the cure to him must be first priority. But short of letting Saren have it we must do everything to obtain it!"
"That we will. We will try to get it," Shepard promised, "You have my word on it. We'll enter the base and obtain the cure, and that all hopefully without the salarians noticing."
Tali spoke up in a humorous tone: "The Alliance, the Council, now the salarians - you're really not easy on your allies, Jon, are you?"
Shepard sighed. "Don't remind me of the mess that awaits me once we return from this planet. The Alliance will already be waiting for me due to the incident with Burns." He turned to Wrex again. "Let's just hope the salarians won't notice anything. Come, let's see what plan Kirrahe has. If it's a ground assault plan I might just agree with him, even if for totally different reasons."
…
When Shepard finally entered the salarian camp, he noted that his ground team had already taken up positions in the various tents. He himself headed straight towards the largest one, which he assumed was the command post, an assumption verified when he encountered Captain Kirrahe there, plus some further salarians. There was little else in the tent besides the aliens, few furniture and equipment. It looked positively barren.
The Captain noticed his approach very quickly. "Have you spoken with the krogan?" he asked.
"Yes. He won't be a problem," Shepard answered. "Have you devised an alternate plan?"
"Of sorts. It's maybe not much more subtle than your idea," Kirrahe admitted, "We just don't have the necessary resources to do subtle. Instead we have to go for crude, but effective: We can convert our ship's drive core into a twenty kiloton ordinance."
"And then what?" Shepard asked, "Anything that nuke can do good old mass accelerated rocks from space can do, too."
"Not easily," Kirrahe disagreed. "The base is well fortified. After enough hits it would crumble, but for how long could your ship sustain a bombardment without getting detected? Your Lieutenant Kaidan told me about your ship' stealth abilities, but they're insufficiently tested in actual combat operations."
"You make a good point," Shepard conceded. After all, he planned to eventually agree to a ground assault. Not because he thought that the better variant to destroy the base, but because it would give him a chance to obtain the genophage cure. "What do you suggest instead?"
"There are geothermal taps on the other side of the base," Kirrahe explained, "If the nuke were to be placed there, even the base's fortification couldn't withstand the destruction. The problem is getting it to there. Your ship can play a role in that, it would transport the nuke. However, first all AA towers in the area must be disabled and any ground forces must be pacified. In order to do that, we must infiltrate the base."
And that's the fault in his plan. But also Shepard's opportunity. If his men were to infiltrate the base, they could get their hands on the genophage cure. "And how do we do that?" the Commander asked, "An attack on foot?"
"We don't have the numbers to take them in a heads-on attack," Kirrahe disagreed, "I'd divide my men into three groups and hit the front side of the facility. That should be enough to convince the geth of a major assault. Meanwhile, you'd command 'Team Shadow' and sneak your men into the back of the facility."
"Sounds risky," Shepard commented. "And it only works if you can convince the geth that you're the main attack. Can you in fact do that with what you have available?"
"No," Kirrahe admitted, "Part of my plan would call for some of your men to supplement ours. Three or four of your soldiers, to form up half a team. Whoever you assign to this would be given command of that team, of course."
This is getting better and better. "Supplement your forces in the killing zone," Shepard commented.
"I'm afraid so. I don't think many of us will make it out alive," Kirrahe said, "But I still think this plan has a higher chance of success than yours, Commander. And even if it fails we can still use your plan as a back-up, as long as your ship gets away."
Shepard did not like the plan. It basically relied on the salarians, and whoever he sent with them, getting slaughtered as a diversion. However, it was a workable plan for a ground assault, just what he needed. What bothered him was that he thus would risk his men's life, would even lose men, not to defeat Saren, but to help the krogan. That was not what those people had signed up for.
Still, it was the only way to obtain that data.
"You're right," Shepard hence said after some hesitation. "If need be, the Normandy can still try to destroy the facility from orbit. Your plan has a back-up. Mine doesn't. Very well. I'll speak with my men and will then send some to you."
"Of course, Commander," Kirrahe answered. "Take your time to choose them. I know that you'll have need of your best troops inside the base, but we could use some endurable and tough fighters to draw fire. Also, take your time to prepare your men. This will be a difficult mission."
"On that we absolutely agree," Shepard confirmed and went outside.
He walked among the tents pondering the issue. The selection of the right people for the job was crucial. Not only for the mission's success, but also due to questions of loyalty. If the secondary mission, getting the genophage cure, was a success, and if somehow it got known that Shepard had that cure in his possession, then the Commander had no doubt he would be very, very dead very, very quickly, Spectre or not.
Thus it was clear he had to use his Spectre entourage as his base force. He trusted them more in such matters than the regular marine detachment. Which meant part of the marines had to go with the salarians. So that I can obtain a cure for the krogan. Really not what they've signed up for. That lasted rather heavily on him. He knew the mission was more important than individual lives, but he would not discard their lives for the sake of the mission, but rather for the sake of the krogan. If it were just the mission he would still have opted for simply destroying the base from orbit.
However, there just was no alternative. Leaving the krogan without a cure to be potentially used later would be even worse then sending soldiers to their death.
He found Kaidan and Ashley in one of the tents, talking. He waved both over to them, and had them follow him to a covered niche in the cliff behind the camp.
"I'm feeling like in a secret agent vid here," Ashley mock-complained as they walked.
"You should," Shepard answered seriously. That made the Gunnery Chief fall silent.
When they finally reached the cliff, Shepard stopped in a small niche of it. Grey walls loomed above them, casting a deep shadow on them. Some of the lush vegetation growing atop the cliff hung over its edge, directly over the heads of the small group.
Kaidan spoke up: "So, what's the matter, Jonathan? What did Kirrahe tell you?"
"Kirrahe has devised a plan to destroy the base by using a well-placed improvised nuke," Shepard explained. "In order to place it, though, we have to infiltrate the base, while the salarians will mount a distraction attack."
"Taking out the base from the ground?" Ashley asked, "That's not usually your style, skipper. Not if you could also just use the Normandy. What gives?"
"As always, the issue has become a bit more complicated than we had thought it would be," Shepard answered, "There'll be a secondary objective. But the salarians mustn't know of it!"
"Oh here we go again..." Ashley muttered.
Kaidan smiled at the Chief's comment and asked: "What is it this time?"
"You've heard Kirrahe," Shepard said, "Saren has a working cure for the genophage. I want to secure it, not destroy it."
"What?" Ashley exclaimed. "If the Council hears of that..."
"Not so loud!" Shepard hissed. "You're right. That just means the Council mustn't find out. But think tactically. What's usually the better objective? Capturing the target, or destroying it?" Shepard figured that was a better approach to take with Ashley than to bring up the krogan's plight.
"Okay, fair point," Ashley conceded, "And then what? What do you want to do with your captured target?"
"I won't give it to the krogan, if that is what worries you," Shepard replied, "I know that would just instantly mean round two of the Krogan Rebellions. Galaxy-wide war. No, that mustn't happen. But we can hold it in reserve. Until such a time it's safe to use it." His voice darkened. "Or when we might need krogan mass armies again. Like against the Reapers."
This was not his primary reason for wanting to save the genophage cure. His primary reason was in fact not about usefulness but purely about ethics: He did honestly feel destroying the cure if there was an alternative would be a crime. However, he had no problems arguing his point that way, too. It was true, after all. Should the Reapers really come we might need the krogan.
"I shouldn't be surprised anymore," Ashley commented and shook her head "Yet I am."
"We're newcomers on the galactic stage, Commander," Kaidan pointed out, "Do you really think it's wise to get involved in old conflicts?"
"We're newcomers, but we can't act as if we're not yet fully part of the galactic scene anymore," Shepard argued, "And the krogan numbers are dwindling. This might just be their rescue. Maybe their only one. That makes the cure a very valuable object to hold in reserve"
"That's true," Kaidan conceded, "As long as it is kept in reserve and kept secret it might be of great use in the future. But it's risky of course."
"But then, what isn't? Seems like everything has been risky one way or another since the geth attacked Eden Prime" Ashley said, "I don't want to argue with you again, skipper. It's your call. And I can see the value of your... extended objective."
"Well... good," Shepard replied, somewhat surprised. He had expected a discussion. "It's not easy, though. If it were not for that secondary objective, I would simply have the Normandy bomb everything. Thus, people now might die just so the genophage cure is saved."
"Ours is not to reason why, ours but do and die," Ashley quoted with a humourless grin.
Shepard sighed. "That might well happen. Kirrahe doesn't have enough men for a convincing distraction, so he asked for some men of mine. I've decided to split the marines - one half under the command of each of you. One will stay with me, one will go with the salarians. And that salarian distraction attack most likely will be bloody."
"I should go," Kaidan volunteered. "The two teams need coordination, so a liaison officer will be required."
"I agree," Shepard said, "if that's all that were required, a liaison, I'd send you. However, you'd be taking part in the assault on the base's front side. That requires the ability to both dish out and take heavy damage. And with all due respect, I think that's rather Ashley's niche."
"I'll go," Ashley confirmed decisively.
And maybe a little too enthusiastically, or so Shepard judged. "No heroics, Ash!" he ordered. "You'll take Privates Ramirez and Bethlen with you. As I understood Kirrahe, that will be half of one team, one of three he'll use, and you'll be given command of that particular one."
"Understood, skipper," Ashley replied. "Don't worry. I won't charge head first into battle, I know we're only the distraction."
"Very well," said,. "Since the Normandy has alerted the geth, we need to act fast. The assault will be in a few hours. Prepare yourselves!"
"Aye-aye, sir," Ashley confirmed. Kaidan merely nodded.
"Oh and Ashley?" Shepard continued, "You'll be my eyes and ears among the salarians. If they do anything that could endanger our... secondary objective tell me, but of course keep that objective a secret under any circumstances!"
"Will do, skipper," Ashley said.
Shepard nodded and walked off, towards the tents again.
His mind was still heavy with concern. It would have been so easy to simply bomb Saren's base from orbit, from a safe distance the AA guns could not reach, under the cover of stealth so the geth could not react to it. Kirrahe's plan gave an opportunity to Shepard to obtain the genophage cure - but it almost certainly also meant that people would die, and that soon. Attacking a base as well fortified and staffed as Saren's, with merely the sorry remnants of an infiltration regiment and the ground team of a single frigate - Shepard had no illusions about the odds: It would be bloody, and there was a chance for total failure.
He had written down his last will and sent it to the Notary's Office of the Navy, and he accepted the possibility of his own death. Thus he felt as though he should be well prepared for it. However, there was a nagging thought at the back of his hand; a doubt that had been planted by Ashley some days back. There was one issue he had not settled yet, one issue where he truly had been a coward so far.
And it was time to settle it now. It was possible there would not be a chance for it later.
After walking between the tents for some time he finally found the person he was looking for, the person who meant so much to him.
"Tali," he greeted her, "do you have time to talk?"
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Since landing on Virmire, Tali had been taken aback by the beauty of the place. Their landing place at the coastline seemed to have the best of two worlds: The ocean, appearing as infinite as space but more lively and glistering in sunlight, and the even more lively, green vegetation atop rocks and cliffs. She had come to appreciate the natural beauty of garden worlds on her pilgrimage, and she knew she would miss it once back on the Flotilla.
It was a depressing thought, maybe even an unnecessarily depressing thought, considering that was still in the future, but it fit to her mood. She had heard how Shepard has promised to Wrex to save and obtain Saren's cure to the genophage. She knew that hence Shepard would not try to destroy the base from orbit, but on the ground. And she knew that this meant the upcoming battle would be quite bloody.
She also knew that if given the opportunity, Shepard would do the same for her people as he was doing now for the krogan, and that the krogan had been victims of Council politics just as much and even more than her own people. So she could not argue against the Commander's decision. It was the right thing to do - but as always the right thing to do was also the difficult thing to do.
She was well aware she could die on this mission. If she did, she had no doubt Shepard would find a way to get the geth data to the Flotilla. She was ready to contribute everything to the mission, including her life. However, she felt a strange desire to let Shepard know this. To reassure him, support him. And maybe to be reassured by him.
She grinned ironically at her own thoughts. She had always prided herself on her self-reliance. And truthfully, she did not need reassurance. However, it feels nice...
She knew there were so many things left unspoken between her and Shepard. It was probably for the better, though. She would eventually return to her people, and never see him again, and it was just better if certain things were not said in the meantime. At least, that was what she was constantly telling herself. Even though that rationalization did not exactly make her happy.
She shook her head. It did not matter now anyway. She might die soon, or he might die soon. Battle was upon them.
I should go talk to him before that, though, she decided.
However, just as she set out to do so it was in fact him who found her.
"Tali," she heard a voice behind her, "do you have time to talk?"
"Ah, Jon," she answered, turning around, "Of course. I was just looking for you in fact."
Shepard responded to that with a smile. "Good. But not here. I think I've seen a path halfway up the cliffs over there."
That surprised her. Even if he wanted some privacy, surely it would have been sufficient to simply get some steps distance to the camp. However, she did not disagree, and followed him.
The 'path' consisted of little more than stepping stones, but they all were still broad enough that Shepard and Tali could walk upwards, and did not need to climb. It led directly above the sea, with no beach between cliff and ocean. Waves moved relentlessly against the stone beneath them.
They finally arrived on a little plateau on half the cliff's height. It was relatively small, but even here Virmire's omnipresent vegetation had secured its place. Several bushes of various sizes were growing here, and the ground was covered in small plants not dissimilar to the ferns she had seen in the Amazonian jungle on Earth.
The two stopped there and looked out over the sea. It was a perfect pale blue, interrupted only by rocks and stones around which the waves played.
"It's beautiful," Tali commented. "I wished my people had a homeworld like that." Usually she did not think often about the tragedy of the exile of her people. That after all was just an unchangeable fact. However, right now, she felt rather emotional.
"They will," Shepard answered. His voice was soft, yet serious. "Maybe not now. But you quarians have endured for centuries; surely eventually you will find a home. Despite all problems."
Tali wanted to give him a smile as response, but he would not have been able to see it anyway. Curse this suit. "My journey made me appreciate it," she said, "Why we need a home."
Shepard's view was still fixed on the sea. "It is beautiful, isn't it?" he asked, quietly and softly. He turned his face to Tali and grinned. "So why not settle down here?"
"You know why," she answered, half sad and half humorous. "The local biosphere is levo-amino, like most biospheres we've encountered. And there's too much microbiological life in the air for us. Besides, if the Council has not managed to secure the area for colonization in centuries, the Migrant Fleet surely won't be able to, either."
"And so, instead Saren has set up his base here," Shepard commented.
"Yes," Tali answered. Emotions boiled up in her. She really wanted Shepard to know that she was willing to take the base out no matter the cost. It was important to her that he should know. Words came pouring out of her: "That base must be destroyed. I know why we have to go through it, instead of destroying it from space. But still, Saren cannot be allowed to keep it."
"I have no intention of letting him keep it," Shepard said with half a grin.
"The salarians are ready to die to destroy the base... and so am I," Tali said emotionally, "I'll fight with fire for you, Jon."
She would be at Shepard's side. No matter all other circumstances, no matter all the things left unspoken, she would not leave it. She could support him, she could fight for him - that at least she could do, and hence she would. It was unusual for to be so emotionally charged, but this all was important to her.
"I know," Shepard responded softly. He took one of Tali's hands and placed it between his. This startled the quarian, but she did not withdrew her hand. Five fingers stroke over her three. "I know because you always have so far," the Spectre continued.
"I... I don't think... we shouldn't..." Tali stammered.
Shepard's simple action had brought her thoughts into a disarray. And I thought never bringing the first sentence to an end was bad was one. Another was: What is he doing? And yet another: That's... nice.
"Tali," Shepard spoke. His voice was grave, serious but friendly, and easy to follow. It cut through the confusion in her head. "We both know there's an entire litany of unspoken things between us. And I know why that is so. I know you will eventually have to return to your people, and even now, well, what with your suit..." His voice trailed off.
It was apparent that he was nervous, but then so was she. There was a tumult of contradictory emotions in her. She cared about Shepard, was fond of him. Yet part of her screamed at her to end this talk, as it would only hurt them both. However, another part of her, a larger part of her, could listen to what Shepard was saying for hours or days without end. In either case, she was anxious about what would happen now.
Shepard continued to speak, firmer now: "So I know about all this. But that's just no excuse for not at least talking straight about it. The point is..." He let go of her hand and looked down. "The point is that I've been a coward."
A coward? That was a gross misinterpretation of his own character, as far as Tali was concerned. As soon as her hand had been free again, it had begun to fidget nervously at her waist again, together with her another hand. However, despite all nervousness, she would not let something like that stand. "If you've been a coward in this, then so I've been, too," she stated firmly. If for good reasons. "I've seen you, Jon. No matter the dangers we've faced, you've never been been a coward. That's why...why I..." She stopped herself there. Not that it was not plainly obvious what she had been about to say.
"Maybe on the battlefield," Shepard conceded, "But in other issues - I should have spoken. And there is something to be told."
Tali's nervousness grew. She very much wanted to hear now what Shepard had to say, but she was anxious about it, too. The speed of her fidgeting fingers increased even more - until Shepard took both her hands into his.
"Tali - even if nothing can come out of it, I want you to know at least," he said, "That I... despite the species barrier between us. Despite the fact that you're stuck in this suit. Despite the fact that you'll eventually return to the Flotilla - that I care about you. Deeply." His voice became lower, quieter. "As more than just a friend."
He looked down again, a melancholic smile on his face. Tali supposed he had a reason to be. She had been sure for quite some time now that he felt the same as she did. So she could not doubt what he was saying. He had fallen for a women stuck in a suit and only temporarily outside the home of her very insular people. That can't be easy.
She wanted this. What Shepard had said - she had desired that for months now, thinking, knowing, nothing could come out of it. She wanted to be together with him, wanted that so very much. But that was just her. She also had to think about him and no matter her feelings, trying something like this, trying a relationship would simply not have been fair to him.
"I'm sorry, Jon," she whispered.
That made him look up abruptly. "Sorry?" he asked, "What for?"
"You know... you surely know by now I feel the same," she answered. "I care about you, too. And as long as I'm on the Normandy I will stand beside you and support you whenever you might need it. But... that's all I can do. So, I'm sorry if I've given the wrong signals. I let my emotions dictate me, and that was selfish."
"Selfish?" Shepard asked. "I'm sorry, Tali, but I really don't understand what you mean."
"It shouldn't have become clear to you what I feel!" she answered strongly, and pulled her hands away from his. "Because no matter what I feel, it wouldn't be fair to you. Eventually, I'll leave, and it's not like we can ever..." She looked straight downwards now, and her voice was barely above a whisper. "Not like we can ever kiss, or be intimate."
"Tali, is that what you've been thinking of?" Shepard asked tenderly.
Why doesn't he understand? It was difficult enough for her to fight off the part inside herself saying 'To hell with all that.'. Why does he need to make it even more difficult? "Yes," she answered, "but it doesn't m..."
"Tali," Shepard interrupted her decisively. She looked up again, to face him.
He took a hold of her shoulders. And slowly, he let her glide into an embrace.
"...matter," Tali ended her sentence, surprised. That was too much now. She wanted to free herself herself of his embrace, but she could not. Inside her, emotions grew stronger than rationality. And it was not like she had not dreamed of this before. Her muscles relaxed.
"Tali," Shepard repeated, "all you say - it may not matter anyway. We might all die here. Or on the next mission. And even if not, Saren could still succeed. If the Reapers return, then we will surely all die. This all could happen. So... why worry about the later? Why worry about problems that might never manifest anyway?"
Instead of answering, Tali simply let herself sink deeper into Shepard's embrace. After a while she said: "I've dreamed of this. I never thought it could be... that we... but I can't deny it. I've... I've wanted this. Just exactly this."
She lay head on his shoulder and he began to stroke her back.
"I think we both deserve some happiness," Shepard said. "At least for as long as it can last."
This made Tali look up again."That's what I meant," she said. "I am happy. I... cannot tell you how happy. I'm right where I wanted to be for a long time now. But what about you? Don't you..."
"I am happy," Shepard insisted. "I have all I need for that right here." He grinned. "Let me decide that much for myself, will you?"
"Hm, sometimes I'm not sure if that's a good idea," Tali joked, but all thoughts about further protests were gradually leaving her. It felt good to be held like that, by somebody she cared about, somebody who felt the same about her. After a while she spoke up again: "Thank you, for - for not being a coward. I would never have said something, but - even if nothing else comes out of this I wouldn't want to miss this moment for anything in the galaxy."
And for quite some time the two simply stood there, holding each other, getting as close as her suit allowed. A deep peace came over Tali. I could get used to that. Finally, nothing was left unsaid between her and Shepard. It felt as if finally, she had arrived at the end of a journey, an end she thought she would never reach, a fulfilment of her wishes and feelings. Something that would finally, finally allow her to rest.
Far too early for her liking, Shepard loosened the embrace. However, he kept holding her arms, and kept her very close by. "I... I've been thinking" he told her. He seemed to be nervous again. "I mean... it cannot be totally unheard of for quarians to have relationships with, well, members of other races."
Tali had informed herself on that. Despite her longstanding commitment to ignore her emotions, she had looked up the topic on the extranet, and she dimly recalled some talk on the Flotilla, where such subjects served as fuel for chatter and gossip about scandalous behaviour.
"Sure," she replied. "It's - it doesn't happen often, it's uncommon, but yes, it does happen." She noticed how she became insecure about the issue. "In most cases - it's not easy. It never is. Most times, everything happens outside the suit. You know, nerve stimulations and such. Not that you could know..." Did I seriously just bring up nerve stimulation programs? "That... that seems like a cheap solution to me, though. Ah, well, that is, especially for the other side. It's always problematic."
She noticed how Shepard had raised an eyebrow. His look was still tender, but also amused. Tali realized to what conclusions she had immediately jumped. Oh Keelah. She had been so content until now to be never more than just a friend to Shepard that she had not realized how much penned up desire there was in her. And there was. For now, she was happy to be held by Shepard, but that also made her wonder if there could be more - and she wanted more. With him.
"And I... I'm probably talking too much," she concluded.
"I think it's cute," Shepard answered, humorously and barely above a whisper.
"Then I've been very lucky to have found you," Tali commented. And meant it. I have been very lucky indeed. After a pause she continued: "I've bottled up everything so far, but now that we, that we... I want it to be real Jon. If we're going to be together I want to feel your skin on mine."
Shepard's touch on her arms became tighter as she said so. "Is that possible?" he asked, quietely and tenderly.
"It's problematic," she answered. She breathed out. He has a right to know. Everything. "On the Flotilla, two... partners would have to sync their envirosuits before. That's how we - it's our greatest sign of trust, of acceptance. Ah, I mean it's not always for such purposes, but it shows a willingness for, ah, intimacy. Not always, but..." She breathed out. "We get sick at first, and then we adapt. Those matters are not even easy purely among my own people. I just... I just think it's fair you know that. Before you commit yourself to anything."
Shepard remained silent for a while. Then he answered: "I won't pretend that doesn't bother me. The lack of intimacy I mean." Tali looked down. It was a reasonable answer, and Shepard was only right, but it still made her sad. However, Shepard gently laid his hand under her visor and led her sight upwards again. "I'm willing to try it, though. I know it's problematic but if there is a way... to be with you I'd be willing to try it."
"And I thought I could simply hide everything, pretend my feelings aren't there," Tali commented, "But if you're willing to try it, then so am I. This... this means a lot to me Jon. You mean a lot to me. I've never shown my face to anybody, but I'd be willing to show it to you." She hesitated. "If... If I can do so without dying."
"Is that a possibility, Tali?" Shepard asked gravely. "That, if we share intimacy, that you can die?"
"It's always a risk," Tali answered. "Maybe the reaction would be minor. Maybe it would put me down for a few weeks. Or maybe it would kill me."
Shepard's grip on her arms loosened, and he withdrew a bit. It was easy to deduce what thoughts were running in his head. Have I said too much? She did not want him to be afraid. Not for her. And she wanted what they were talking about. She wanted it very much.
"Jon," she continued, "we quarians never live far away from death. Be it by infection or by hull breach or by lack of resources." Humorously she added: "And if every act of intimacy killed us, then there would be no quarian race anymore." She looked down. "But there is a risk. There always is."
"I don't know..." Shepard began.
Hastily, Tali interrupted him: "There are ways to temporarily strengthen our immune systems. Antiobiotic injections, immunoboosters, that kind of things. It's possible. But it's never easy. For either side."
Shepard smiled faintly at that. "I don't want easy. I want you." He pulled her into an embrace again. "But - you bear the risk. In the end, it's your decision."
"If it was just me?" Tali asked, laying her head on his shoulder. "You gave me a home on the Normandy. You gave me a chance to prove myself. You always trusted me. And I watched you - I watched you saving the colonists on Feros when nobody else could. I watched you moving heaven and hell to get them justice. I watched you tearing yourself apart when you learned about Cerberus, and yet even then you did the right thing. And I watched you... us getting ever closer, and yet I never thought it could end like... this." She looked up again, into his face. "Yes, Jon. I want this. I have never wanted anything for myself as much as this. I just never thought it could be possible. But I've been wrong: If there's only the smallest chance of this working out, a chance of being with you, then I want to grab it and hold on to it."
"Good," Shepard answered. "Then I... well, I think we both will have something to look forward. To carry us through this mission. I don't know what will come out of it, but... if this mission is over, let us try, shall we?"
"Definitely," Tali answered. She was surprised at herself at how sultry it had sounded.