The Greatest Secret

Disclaimer: Nope, don't own iCarly

A/N: This story details what it would be like if Sam and Freddie were secretly together during the series. Read it, I'm sure you'll enjoy it.

Chapter 48 (Role Play: Jonah)

The start of the school day brought Sam, Jonah and Freddie talking about school. Sam had a cheese can that she snagged from the kitchen cabinet at home, which made Freddie wonder why she would do such a thing. Valerie was at the library, studying for a test she had that day. "Okay, so I'm still not sure about the test in our class," Jonah said while looking at Freddie.

"Yeah, it shouldn't be too hard, did you take notes?" Freddie asked while taking off his backpack.

"You know I wasn't here the other day, right?"

"Right, so I'll let you borrow my notes." Freddie took out his notebook and handed it to Jonah. Sam shook her cheese can and squirted some cheese into her mouth. The boys raised their eyebrows and stared at her. "Why did you bring the cheese can with you instead of a regular lunch?" Sam looked at Freddie and smiled.

"Oh, I just like cheese, you know that," Sam replied. Freddie chuckled and rolled his eyes slightly. "I thought you guys already took a test in that class of yours."

"She does a test almost every three days," Jonah said while giving a slow sigh. They hated the way their teacher taught, but they could do nothing about it. "So these notes are for the one coming up. We should actually get the results for the one we took the other day, and during lunch, if everyone got an A…we get to see a bird." Sam raised her eyebrow and chuckled while shaking her head.

"Well, I hope you do well on the tests then. You know what, I just thought of something recently that I wanted to bring up to you guys."

"What?"

"Well, Carly asked me why I never seemed interested in any guys, so I thought I'd pretend to have a crush on someone. Do you think I should?" Freddie and Jonah looked at each other and shrugged.

"Well, it is only acting, so I don't have a problem with it," Freddie stated while rubbing his chin. "Timing could be right, like when Carly's nearby. So, some guy probably should act really cool and impressive, I suppose."

"Yeah, but where are we going to get a guy to pretend to like me?" The three rubbed their chin in thought. Sam and Freddie both turned their heads and looked toward Jonah, he blinked and sighed.

"How did I not see that coming?" Jonah asked while narrowing his eyes. "Okay, what can go wrong?"

"Yeah, there shouldn't be anything going wrong," Freddie said looking over to see Jeremy sneezing on a water fountain. "I feel sorry for the next kid that has to drink from that." Jonah and Sam looked over and laughed as the bell rang.

"Well, I'll be by to return the notes during lunch," Jonah said while patting Freddie's shoulder. "I guess I'll meet you by Carly and Sam's locker, right?"

"Yeah, catch you later." The trio parted ways and waited until lunch time. When lunch came, Sam was at her locker eating from the cheese can. Carly walked by and raised her eyebrow.

"Hey, what's that?" Carly asked while pointing to the can.

"Lunch."

"That's what your mom gave you for lunch?" Sam chuckled and shrugged her shoulders.

"I'm just happy she woke up before noon." Carly smiled and rolled her eyes as Freddie walked toward them.

"Hello ladies," Freddie said while smiling. "Or should I say, Lady and Sam." Of course, he meant that as Sam being something more than just a Lady to him. She was an angel, a higher rank than that of a lady. Sam raised her eyebrow and squirt the cheese onto Freddie's face. "Hey!" Freddie sighed and pushed the cheese off his face, Carly merely stared at him with wide eyes, appalled that Sam did that. "I should squirt that cheese on her, then maybe lick it off…hmm, there's a thought." Freddie blinked and quickly shook his head, trying to remove the perverted thoughts. "How cheesy..."

"Though, I wouldn't mind eating that cheese off of his chest." Carly quickly grabbed the can away from Sam. "Hey!"

"You'll get this back when you learn to handle cheese properly!" Carly scolded. Carly sighed and rolled her eyes, both she and Freddie knew it was just a joke. The group looked over as a teacher in a bird costume stepped out of the classroom.

"Uh, who is that?" Sam asked. She was trying to get Carly scolding her for having a little fun with Freddie out of her mind. Since when was it Carly's place to tell Sam that she couldn't have fun with her boyfriend? "Ugh, that is so irritating sometimes!"

"That's our one teacher who told us if everyone got A's on the quizzes, she'd dress up like a chicken for the whole day," Freddie replied.

"Oh, cool." Sam took the cheese can out of Carly's hand and narrowed her eyes. Just then, Jonah walked up to Freddie and handed him the notebook.

"Hey Freddie, thanks for letting me borrow your notes earlier," Jonah said with a smile. Those weren't the same notes he borrowed from Freddie for the current test, but the ones that he borrowed for the last quiz. He didn't make a habit out of borrowing Freddie's notes, it was only those two times that it had happened.

"Hey, anything to get a teacher in a chicken suit!" Freddie said while giving a slight laugh. Jonah laughed and nodded in response.

"Yeah, what's better than that?" Sam smirked and decided to join in.

"Maybe a chicken in a teacher suit." The group laughed and Jonah was struck by an idea.

"Awesome! He'd be all like, do your homework!" This was said while making chicken noises. Sam looked at Carly and put on the best acting face she could and pretended to be attracted to Jonah. Freddie saw the look and decided to look away, since she was such a good actor, it almost looked real.

"You make funny chicken noises." Jonah chuckled lightly and glanced to the side, unsure of how to really role play the current situation. Freddie nudged him and Sam signaled with her eyes for Jonah to go ahead and take his leave if he wanted.

"Well…I have to go give a nerd a wedgie. Later." Jonah quickly left the scene and Sam decided to go ahead and ask who Jonah was, to make it believable to Carly.

"Hey, who was that guy?"

"Oh, he's a friend of mine in my French class," Freddie answered.

"Okay…Freddie, go to your locker."

"Why?"

"Go to your locker." Sam aimed the cheese gun toward him and he quickly fled to his locker. Carly smiled at her and Sam prepared for Carly's questions.

"You love Jonah," Carly stated clearly, thinking it was obvious that Sam liked him. Normally, Sam would have coughed, but being a good actor, she went along with it.

"Well maybe, I mean he is cool and all."

"You should ask him to hang out!"

"Nah, he wouldn't really like me anyway." Carly scoffed and looked at Sam with a disbelieving smile.

"Are you kidding? He makes chicken noises and bothers other children, he's perfect for you!" Freddie was behind the wall, where his locker was. He coughed harshly when he heard that statement. Sam raised her eyebrow and shook her head, Freddie was really the one perfect for her.

"Forget it…I have to go squirt cheese down Gibby's pants." Sam turned and saw Gibby, Gibby saw her and then decided to slowly walk away. "Gibby! Come here, Gibby!" He then picked up his pace and Sam continued to shout at him. "Don't you run!" Carly chuckled and walked over to Freddie's locker, he was putting something inside and appeared to be a bit annoyed with something. He stood up and looked at Carly, interested in what she might want.

"Freddie, do you believe in love at first sight?" He figured he'd better push it and get Carly away from him by annoying her. He didn't believe in love at first sight, but if he said no, that would probably make Carly like him for not pushing.

"Yes, I do. I always have!" Carly rolled her eyes and shook her head.

"No, I mean that Sam likes your friend Jonah!" Freddie's face fell slightly and he had to keep from looking horribly sick.

"Oh."

"Tell Jonah to ask Sam out!"

"Oh hell no." Freddie's face hardened and he appeared as though he'd just been hit by a tidal wave. No one had anticipated something like that, but he wasn't about to give in. "No! Jonah never did anything bad to me." He brushed past Carly and she placed her hand on his backpack, causing him to turn around and stare at her. "I swear..."

"Come on, Sam doesn't like many guys." There was a reason for that, and the reason was now staring into Carly's eyes while trying not to look completely filled with anger.

"No!" He wasn't becoming angry at Carly, but angry at the fact that she wanted him to get some other guy to ask Sam out. It didn't matter who the guy was, he absolutely couldn't fathom the thought of another guy dating his girlfriend!

"Please, for me?" Freddie's eyes widened and his nostrils flared out slightly, Carly failed to catch the action. That was not something that he needed to hear from Carly, most likely Sam, but never Carly.

"Don't do that." Carly raised her eyebrow and Freddie sighed heavily. "You think that you can just go around and say 'please, for me' and expect me to do whatever you want. Well not this time!" Carly smiled innocently and Freddie narrowed his eyes, hating this situation.

"Please, for me?" She was most likely never going to stop, meaning he would either go crazy and tell her that Sam was his or he would do nothing other than go insane. There was only one choice, he needed to give in, unfortunately.

"Fine…" Carly smiled at him and walked off. He kept his eyes narrow and his glare forward, he needed to keep his cool. Of course, he knew it would be just like what happened with Valerie, role play. The only thing he hated about it was that Carly just initiated it. That meant by doing this, he was pleasing Carly and in turn, impressing her. "DAMN IT!" Freddie roared and slammed his fist into a nearby locker, rage was already coursing through his veins. He felt a soft hand on his shoulder and heard Sam's soft and gentle voice.

"Freddie, what's wrong?" Sam asked him. Whenever she was near him, it was like milk and honey, her voice was ever sweet and melodious to his ears. Upon hearing her, he took a deep breath and managed to calm down completely. He turned to face Sam and smiled softly while gazing into her eyes. He could easily tell that her blue orbs were filled with concern.

"It's Carly, she just got me to tell Jonah to ask you out." Sam frowned and glanced down, slowly shaking her head. She hadn't anticipated that move and wondered why Carly would care that much. She also knew Freddie could be insanely jealous, even if it was Jonah and faked. "I think we'll have to talk to Jonah and Valerie about role playing as a date again."

"It'll be okay, Freddie. We did it with Valerie, so Jonah can role play as a good boyfriend. We'll have to figure out what to do for the end of it, though."

"Yeah, that's true."

"Let's talk to them after school. Just, try to be calm." Sam smiled and looked around her, making sure nobody was nearby. She quickly leaned forward and turned her head, kissing Freddie on the cheek. He smiled at her and exhaled slowly, making sure to remain calm. "Well, I'm off to class now. Also, do your hand a favor…" Sam took his hand and held it up, laughing slightly. "Don't punch anymore lockers."

"I won't, Angel." Sam quickly kissed his lips and walked away.

-NEW SCENE-

"She did what!" Jonah exclaimed, his jaw falling to the floor. "That wasn't supposed to happen!"

"Hey, calm down," Valerie said as she placed her hands on his shoulders and kissed his cheek. Sam and Freddie stood in front of them, holding each other's hands in theirs. Jonah sighed and rubbed his forehead, he didn't like Carly before, and now he didn't like her even more. The whole thing at the lockers had just been awkward for him. "It'll help Sam and Freddie keep their secret even more, as well. Think about it, what if Tyrone suspected Sam of being Freddie's bride?"

"Well, that would be a bad thing." Valerie looked into Jonah's eyes and slowly nodded, reminding him that it would be a very bad thing.

"So, if you role play as her boyfriend, any suspicion placed on her will go away. She will have had a boyfriend and no one will ever suspect her of dating Freddie."

"I guess…How will this relationship end? Oh, and do I get revenge on Carly somehow? I really would like to freak her out!"

"Um, how would you go about doing that?" Sam asked while tilting her head to the side.

"I don't know yet..."

"We'll think of something," Freddie said as he rubbed the back of his neck. "Let's start the role play in class tomorrow."

"Okay." Jonah sighed and crossed his arms, trying to think of something at all tha could come from this. Then it hit him. "Hey, this could be just like Valerie, you guys could date without having to worry!"

"Yeah, that's right! I can call up Sam while she's with Carly." Freddie smirked deviously and Sam gave a slight chuckle.

"Hey, I need to spend time with my friend, too," Sam replied.

"Nonsense, why spend time with someone that makes you feel bad?" Freddie smiled and pulled Sam into a hug, kissing her forehead. He was only joking, he knew Sam was right. She needed to spend time with Carly just as much as any of her other good friends. He liked Carly too and didn't want to make either Carly or Sam stop liking each other. He also knew well that Carly didn't mean to make Sam feel bad, so it was nothing she could control, really. "Yet, you are right…but I'm still going to call you at least once while you're with her!" Sam laughed and kissed Freddie's chin, she didn't mind at all if Freddie did that. She only hoped it wasn't while she was doing anything important.

-NEW SCENE-

The next day, Freddie entered the classroom with Jonah and sighed, the role play would now begin. "Hey Jonah," Freddie said while walking to the desk. Jonah looked up and raised his eyebrow.

"Hey what's up?" They practiced this with the girls, so it should run smoothly. Yet, they both still felt awkward about it.

"You remember that girl that was with me when you handed back my notes?" Jonah put his hands in his pocket and nodded.

"Yeah, she was cool, and cute too." People looked over at the two and listened in, which was actually not what Jonah or Freddie wanted. They figured they should just ignore the people.

"I'm talking about the blonde one."

"Yeah, her name is Sam, right?"

"Yeah…I hear she kind of…likes you." Freddie felt an odd churning inside of him, as though he was probably going to get sick. He knew he needed to get this done quickly or else he would be sick.

"She does? Tell me about her." Jonah sat on the corner of one of the desks, growing sick himself.

"She's got really…great teeth!" The churning in his stomach only seemed to grow. Jonah sighed and closed his eyes.

"That's great, but what's she like?"

"Well…she's really nice, cool, and pleasant…to be around." It was true, but Freddie didn't like the feeling of telling another guy to date her for it, even if it was just role play. He gagged and Jonah slowly stood up, actually wondering if Freddie would be okay.

"Hey dude, are you alright? You look kind of sick. We can stop…"

"Yeah…" Freddie placed his hand on his stomach and groaned. "So, why don't you…ask her out?"

"Alright, I will. Thanks for hooking me up." Freddie raised his eyebrow and swallowed.

"I'm talking about the blonde one."

"Yeah, I know." Jonah looked at his friend with concern, he hoped Freddie would be okay. He was actually feeling pretty sick himself, but he knew that most of his time would not be spent with Sam, Freddie would be the one spending it all with her. He walked to his desk, but would keep a close eye on his friend, making sure Freddie wouldn't get too sick and keel over.

That's the end of that chapter! Thank you all who are reviewing! I would never have gotten this far without you!

Keep in mind, that I am not trying to make Carly look bad obviously, so don't complain about the fact that Jonah doesn't like Carly. He doesn't, but that is for his own reasons. He doesn't like the pain that she, through her grandfather, are causing his friends. He doesn't know her like Sam and Freddie and therefore doesn't trust that she could ever stray from her grandfather's ways. He's also not like Valerie who is more calm and patient, therefore more understanding and lenient about things. So again, please enjoy this, and don't complain about Jonah's dislike for Carly...