The hospital walls are whiter than Gwen remembers. She keeps her eyes trained on the ceiling so she doesn't have to see how the wires and tubes stick out of her daughter. Essie looks so very tiny and small against the blue and white gown. Izzy is laid against her twins lap, her soft brown locks tumbling down.
How did things get so out of control so fast?
A soft tapping at the door draws Gwen's eyes away from the ceiling and to a young blond nurse. She carries a tray of food and smiles in Gwen's direction.
"Remember me?"
"Bridgette…?" Gwen manages to stutter out. She's gotten beautiful over the years, her blonde hair still sun-streaked and she is taller now. However, now her skin has an unhealthy pallor. Her blue eyes don't have that sparkle of youth, and in Gwen's eyes she looks tired.
"What happened to you Bridge?" Gwen pushes her chair to the side and takes the plate from Bridgette, and sets it to the side. Bridgette pulls her into a warm hug and Gwen melts, tears prickling at the corner of her eyes.
"Geoff got into surfing accident. He's beeI don't see you for 10 years and them I see you, in my town with twins in the hospital. I mean, the sporadic emails are one thing but couldn't you have at least told LeShawna and I?"
Bridgette is babbling and dimly Gwen remembers she does this when she has bad news but lets it slide. For now, she just needs someone to listen.
"I left the island because I was pregnant." Bridgette shakes her head, hiding a smile. She takes Gwen's hand and leads her two empty seats outside Essie's room.
"That's how you got those two beautiful little one's."
Gwen sighs, shaking her head and laughs bitterly.
"Alejandro's their father. At the time, I was with Duncan so we thought they were going to be his. But then the day came, and I delivered them at home. Two babies as brown as baked bread. I was still seventeen and he felt obligated to take car of us, that is me and the girls."
"Did you at least try and contact Alejandro, he has a right to know." Bridgette tentatively reaches over to place her hand on top of Gwen's.
"I tried. But he didn't answer. Besides, I want the finale. He hooked up with Heather. And besides, I've been in and out of the hospital since Essie's been born. She's been a sickly little thing…"
"Gwen, that isn't your fault." Gwen shakes her head and places a hand on her stomach.
"In my womb, Essie didn't get the nutrients she needed. Izzy was the bigger one, she…I don't know she was the only one to come out healthy. And now, she's got PTSD. She's been having panic attacks and refuses to eat. The doctors had to sedate her when we got hear. I don't know how I'm going to pay for the bills this time."
There was silence for a minute, both women lost in a train of thought.
"Let me be apart of you and twins' life." Bridgette's voice is fervent and she squeezes Gwen's hand gently.
"You don't have to ask Bridge, we've been through too much together." Gwen doesn't fail to notice the sad flash in Bridgette's blue eyes. But before she could question the other woman, she had stood up and dusted off her scrubs.
"I have runs to make with my other patients, but I'm going to see if I can be stations as Essie's main nurse." Bridgette tried to smile, but it only came out as a griman]ce. A chill slowly starts to creep up Gwen's spine, but just then Izzy walks out.
"She still hasn't woken up mommy… She's been sleep since the doctor's se… sedated her. Its called se…sedating right?" Her mother` can't help but laugh as Izzy trips over the unfamiliar word.
It's isn't a word a ten year old should know, but Gwen doesn't believe in hiding the truth from her girls. She loves them too much for that. Gwen holds onto her daughters and kisses her forehead softly.
"She'll be awake soon and everything will be just fine pretty girl." Izzy giggles at the use of the nickname, and the sound of her daughters laughter lifts her heart.
"Duncan should be here soon and you're gonna go home with him. I'm going to stay here with Essie okay?" Izzy opens her mouth as if to protest but stops at seeing the look in her mother's eyes.
"Okay mom, you know what's best."
Izzy shrugs her shoulders and climbs into her mothers lap, snuggling down to go back to sleep. A silence slivers down and only the sound of Izzy's breathing keeps Gwen from completely falling apart.
Something about this visit feels more ominous, and for a second Gwen truly fears for her daughters.
Before she can dwell on the situation, Gwen's phone rings. She slowly slides Izzy into the seat net to her and walks to the end of the hallway before answering.
"Duncan, where the hell are you. I have been waiting on you all day they had to sedate my daughter I needed you by my side today…" To her horror, tears are steaming down her face and her voice is cracking.
"Did you know about Geoff. He's been in a coma I know you kept track of things why…Duncan… God I'm so…" She is crying too hard to even speak, her chest is heaving and she has to lean against the wall to keep her balance.
"How am I going to pay these hospital bills? The doctors are running so many test on my baby…"
"Yes. I did now about Geoff but Essie was being hospitalized for pneumonia. I didn't want you rushing off trying to be some goddamned hero. I've been out today, I'm sorry I wasn't at your beck and call. I can't pick up Izzy tonight I'm picking up a double shift so we aren't going to be completely in debt."
The line goes dead, and Gwen bites her lips so she doesn't wake up Izzy. She wants to tell him he's wrong, that she has to be the hero since no one else will.
She walks back to Izzy and sets the sleeping child in her lap. Gwen rests her head on Izzy's hair and she smells nothing but the scent of marshmallows and promises.
"Everything's going to be okay. I promise Izzy…"
Alejandro sits at the bar and stares at his reflection. He can see every line in his face reflected in the colorless vodka he ordered.
"You are nothing. Nothing to them and nothing to me."
He takes a swing, one for sorrow and another for good measure. Her voice rings in his eyes, and the dull throb in his heart refuses to go away. The bartender is young and pretty with short hair and too much mascara, she reminds in of Gwen.
Maybe I'll sleep with her tonight…
He flashes his smiles, all dimples and crinkled green eyes but she looks at another man, tall and muscular with a familiar face.
Alejandro raises his glass to him, a mocking gesture and Duncan's teal eyes flash with anger.
"The man of the hour. Heard you're engaged. Senorita, por favor, a mug of dark beer for my friend here. You like beer, yes?" Duncan's fists are bawled and a vein is throbbing at the side of his head.
"I didn't come here so you by me a drink."
"Then why did you come? You won Duncan." Alejandro tries to hide the bitter edge in his voice by taking a long gulp of his drink.
"How did you even find me."
"A little bird told me. Came into my auto shop looking heartbroken. Had your stench all over him." Duncan spat in Alejandro's drink and before he can take another breath Alejandro has slammed his body against the bar.
"You dare to presume you know anything about my situation. I have been waiting ten yeas to find her only to find out she has you. You won. Let me leave this shit down in peace or I swear, you will be burned." His fist closes around Duncan trachea, his breath completely cut off. He wonders wait would happen if he killed him, right here and right now.
Gwen would be torn.
He lets go and sits back in his seat swirling around the straw.
"I'm leaving her." Alejandro continues staring in his drink, too tired to fight.
"Fucking bastard. You've got the girl of your dreams-"
"She wants you. She needs you. I'm not playing second fiddle to you anymore." Duncan takes a step back as if to walk away but Alejandro grabs his arms.
"You can't just walk away from her. From Essie and Izzy." He loves Gwen, he wants her but not like this.
It wasn't supposed to be like this.
"Essie is sick. I can't be the man she wants me to. I can't…comfort her…" Duncan eyes the Latin man, ands sighs. Both men know truer words have never been spoken.
I'm doing this for Gwen…
Their eyes meet and for a second Duncan almost wants to call this suicide mission off, to go to the hospital and wrap Gwen in his arms.
She deserves more than I can give…
But Duncan has an open flight ticket, and he is leaving tonight to someplace where no one knows his name.
"Duncan, amigo, you can not leave."
"Watch me."