Chapter 14
AN: So so so so so sorry this is late. I haven't had much spare time; it's almost a week late! :( If I do this again, please send me a PM to remind me to update! Thanks everyone.
Still co-written with little-miss-bella-cullen
Reed POV
I love you, I hate you. It was the best possible way to explain how I feel. It was so true. I hated the things he'd said to me, yet I still loved him. I hardly knew him, but it was still true.
I had no idea what to make of my feelings. Josh was either amazing or terrible and I knew I couldn't do anything about it. I didn't know how I was going to get the note to Josh without Thomas finding it first, but I'd find a way.
I was in the library with Josh when I figured out when to slip him the note. Josh left to get candy from the vending machines. I wanted to shove the note into his bag, but of course, Noelle walked in.
"Listen, I'm sure by now you've figured out that it was a bad idea to turn down Billings. I'm here to give you a second chance." She told me
"Noelle, I've got other, important things to do." I said as I walked away from her. As I passed Josh's bag, I slipped the note inside the main pocket so he'd be sure to find it. The only exit was right by the vending machines crap. I'd have to pass Josh to leave. I walked toward the exit and inevitably Josh. When I saw him there I started walking faster. I was just in front of the exit when Josh said "Reed! Where are you going?" He sounded disappointed.
"I've got to go. Sorry Josh." I said, not really answering his question. I just kept walking. I couldn't get distracted. It was cold, but he would understand. After he saw Noelle and the note it would all make sense. I hope.
I was walking back to my room, completely distracted by thoughts of Josh and what he might be thinking. Did he find the note? Was this a joke and he is laughing at me right now? Did Noelle take the note in some twisted way to get me to go into Billings? I decided to wait until tomorrow to tell Constance what was going on. By then I'd know if this is all just a joke.
Josh POV
I love you, I hate you what the HELL is that supposed to mean? I asked myself. It must be those things I'd said to her. I couldn't believe it. I'd ruined my chance with Reed, At least I knew how she felt now, even if it was tearing me up inside. Was she kidding? Did she mean that she doesn't ever want to see me again? I really hoped not. Even if she did, I'd never be able to ignore her. I decided to talk to her and find out what she meant. I sat there, zoning out, again I was in the room I shared with Thomas alone. He was occupied by Ariana; he wouldn't be back for a while.
I knew the least I could do for Reed is tell her exactly what she wants to know. Everything and anything. It's not much, but maybe just maybe, she'd begin to trust me again. I'd tell her everything I'd never told anyone before. I would do it. But would she let me? I'd do whatever it takes for her to listen to me.
I only waited until breakfast to look for Reed. It was perfect. She walked out of the cafeteria and toward the library alone. "Reed!" I yelled, but she didn't listen to me. "Reed, just listen to me." She just kept walking. I used my strongest piece of ammo first, it was bound to get her attention "I had a huge crush on Noelle last year." I knew she heard me. She slowed her run to a brisk walk. "She's the only one who knows. Reed I want you to know me. To REALLY know me." I said. She came to a full stop and looked at me. She looked like she had tears in her eyes. Uh-oh. What did I do now? She ran back to where I was standing
"Josh! I'm sorry! I've been treating you unfairly." She said. "I feel horrible. Did you get my note?" she added almost as an afterthought.
"I did. But I don't understand." I told Reed.
"I love you Josh. But I can't get those things you said to me out of my head. You hurt me. I'm not over it yet." She told me softly.
"Reed, I understand. If I could take those things back, I would. I just hope that one day you can forgive me." I said. "Anything you want to know, Reed. I'll tell you. I need you to get to know me." I stood waiting for the interrogation to begin.
"Why Josh? Why did you say those things if you didn't mean them? That's the only thing I care about."
"Reed, you're better than them. I don't want you to be like them, they're selfish and horribly mean. You're to amazing to become one of them. They seem better than they are. I just wanted to protect you. I'm sorry Reed. Will you ever forgive me?"
Reed hesitated for a moment before lightly kissing me. I was shocked for a moment before I realized what was happening. Before I processed what was happening enough to even consider doing something, Reed had pulled away. "Of course I forgive you." She said softly.
I was still too shocked to respond so I just stood there. Reed looked concerned that she did something wrong. So she said "I've been waiting a long time to do that." And walked away from me. I needed to do something before I could let her leave. I grabbed her wrist and said "Wait Reed. You can't go yet." I did what I'd waited too long to do…
AN: C'est fini. I finally got this posted. What did you think of awkward Josh? I think I'll keep him around for another chapter or two.