Chapter Ten – Silence and Silencers

Harry and Kiru received their first letters from Ron and Draco Malfoy, respectively, a few days later. Chessie and Snape were eagerly talking about their different strong points and weaknesses with magics, including the fact that Chessie was an excellent medical witch and wonderful with the wand, while helpless and senseless at potions. Severus was excellent at dueling, having come to duel all four Marauders at once on a very frequent basis, and was, of course, proud of his Potions Master title.

Harry, ecstatic, immediately wrote Ron a reply, an exact copy to Hermione, and was even tempted to write Malfoy a copy...

Ron,

Life's gone surprisingly well living with Professor Snape, and before you drop this letter, let me explain. I was tormented, as you know, by Dudley, my cousin. Well, Snape put a stop to it, for reason I have yet to fathom, and seems intent on tormenting Dudley in the exact ways that Dudley tormented me before my first year. I admit, the Professor took us to the zoo a few days ago, and Dudley flat out refused to go into the reptile house until Snape reminded him of the house rule number two he would be breaking (do as I say when I say it).

Life's not all that bad – we got a new neighbor, a Chessie Hotai, who seems to have taken an interest in our Professor (although he'd deny every scrap of this). I've been staying at her house during the days since the Professor wants me nowhere near the potions, and there's just nothing to do at the park. I have been relieved of my house duties now, and it is now Dudley who is doing them, believe it or not. Kiru is acting a lot like Hermione now that she has to catch up on a whole semester, and Miss Hotai has even started helping our first year with her transfiguration and charms classes. Professor Snape is tutoring Kiru in DADA, and Potions, of course. I have yet to see what else happens, but I do know this much – I get to watch TV and be a normal muggle for once! I never thought I'd see the day when I could be as lazy as I wanted, most especially with Snape and/or Dudley around!

I've got Dudley's old room, and Kiru got the second bedroom. Dudley sleeps under the stairs now, just like I used to, and Snape insists on treating him like the dirt he walks on (not that I'm complaining since Dudley's an overweight jerk). For once, Snape and I are seeing eye to eye, and we have yet to argue over the course of this summer vacation and what to do with it. By good luck, Chessie is a witch who was also from Slytherin. She apparently knew my mom, and as did Snape, but the strange part is that they both hated my dad and didn't even know each other existed till Miss Hotai showed up on Privet Drive.

Well, the summer hasn't been a complete fiasco. I got to see Dudley wet himself on that zoo trip, not to mention that he's actually being starved by Professor Snape, albeit he is being given a nourishment potion to help him stay alive. I'm honestly shocked – the starvation is actually helping him lose weight, but not very much. Miss Chessie is very kind and openhearted about us living with Snape, and flat out refuses to discuss the "charitable cause" that he's doing. Yeah, I can see you snorting at that last part, Ron, don't deny it. I can almost see you all gasping in shock that me and Snape haven't gone at each other's throats yet. I've been trying to think of a few cruel pranks to play on Dudley, and for some strange reason, Snape keeps helping me with that, although I'd appreciate a little more help from the twins, just to rattle his nerves a bit. You'll have to be discreet about it, though. I can't wait to scare Dudley into crapping bricks, it's going to be great! Strangely, though, I can't see either of the two Snape family laughing at his misfortune, and we both know how much the Professor loves misfortune. You know, I'm tempted to scare Malfoy and write him a copy of this letter… tell me what you think of the idea. I'll keep you updated on the Snape duo and my cousin.

Harry

Harry gave the letters to Pigwidgon and Hedwig and sent them off. Kiru smiled at the thought of using the Malfoy's owl, and quickly wrote a reply of her own. Harry knew better than to eavesdrop or to look over her shoulder, but she was kind enough to tell him a few things she'd included in her letter, most especially their trip to the zoo, to which they had to stop and hold their stomachs from laughing too hard. When they finished laughing, she returned to the letter writing. She scrawled across the page, her pens barely touching before she was writing the next letter in a word.

Draco,

I am more than pleased to have received you letter, safe and sound. Everything is much different here in Privet Drive, especially since I'm living with a terrified whale of a muggle under the same roof, as well as dad and Harry Potter. Before you drop the letter, please let me explain. Dumbledore coerced my dad into it, and Lily's summoned corpse most definitely aided in this. It was a warding spell the headmaster used on Harry, but will only work as long as one of Harry's blood relatives lives with him, which my father and I most certainly are not. However, things aren't all bad since Harry will sometimes help me when I get stuck on a defensive charm or a particularly complicated homework assignment that I need his help with.

Now that that is out of the way, we have a new neighbor, another witch by good chance. Her name is Chessie, I never caught her last name. She was also a Slytherin, and to tell you the truth, I was quite shocked at how many similarities she has with dad. They both hated Harry's dad with a very strong passion, albeit they didn't know the other existed until she showed up on our doorstep the day we moved in with Harry and she moved into the neighborhood. I know you worry about housing four people in three bedrooms, but not to worry, I have my own bedroom and it is locked up tight at night!

You see, Harry's got Dudley's old room, and I got the second bedroom. Dudley (Harry's whale of a muggle cousin) sleeps under the stairs now, just like Harry used to before his first year, and dad insists on treating him like the dirt he walks on (not that I'm complaining since Dudley's an overweight jerk). For once, dad and Harry are seeing eye to eye, and I have yet to catch them argue over the course of this summer vacation and what to do with it. You know, I'm tempted to scare Weasel-bee and write him a copy of this letter… tell me what you think of the idea. I'll keep you updated on the happenings of my household as best I can while I catch up on my schoolwork. And don't worry, dad put wards up so that only those who are of age can get into the house without his knowledge. Well, that and Harry, but he doesn't count since he's a Gryffindork.

Well, dad put a stop to Harry's cousin being a spoiled brainless git, for reason I have yet to fathom, and seems intent on tormenting Dudley in the exact ways that Dudley tormented Harry before his first year. I admit, dad took us to the zoo a few days ago, and Dudley flat out refused to go into the reptile house until dad reminded him of the house rule number two he would be breaking (do as I say when I say it). I couldn't help but grin at the look on his face when Harry and I started talking to the snakes inside – it was well worth dad's scowl, I can assure you. Priceless, more so, since the idiot muggle wet himself.

In other news, the prefect has officially been considered a dumbass for barging in on the wrong house. She burst in on Miss Chessie, who hexed the girl into oblivion before finally stopping to contact my dad in a panic. Imagine his surprise and delight when the one we hate so much was caught by our neighbor who hadn't even heard of the problem until that moment. Oh, sure, dad was tired the next day, but I swear that it made him a little fonder of Miss Chessie… Oh, well. I wouldn't mind a new mom, as long as she doesn't turn out like the original one. Speaking of parents, dad's calling me for lunch. Could you give my best regards to your parents for me, please?

Best of Regards,

Kiru Snape, Potions Princess

P.S. Thank you again for saving my life all those many times. I owe you a life debt, and am sure you will know when the time is right to put that into play.

She sent the letter off with the owl, and flopped onto her bed to take a nap, but was disturbed from her sleep by a very upset Dudley, who was once again whining that her father had set up wards against the muggles to keep them out of the kitchen. She could just imagine the looks on Ron, and Draco's faces when they got their letters…

"Guys, he replied this time!" Ron crowed gleefully as Pig reached him. He read the letter once, twice, a third time before finally grasping what it meant. Ginny contacted Bill and Charlie, who had used the Floo Network to take a lunch break at the Burrow. They sat down at the table, exhausted but also wanting to know what in the world was going on with Ron.

"Ron, read it already," Ginny whined as they arrived, and her brother's face paled.

"My god," Ron yelled in shock, and the family jumped, "Snape's brainwashed Harry into being a Slytherin freak!"

"What?" Molly Weasley snapped at her son's crude language, and Ginny snatched the letter from Ron's hands as Fred, George, and Percy all flooded into the room. She read the letter aloud to the others, shock evident on all their faces. "The nerve of those two," Mrs. Weasley growled when she heard of Harry and Kiru's exploits in the zoo. "And I thought Severus better than this!"

"Think, mum," Fred grinned. "He and Harry are only dishing out what the whale dished out to Harry. At least Snape's being halfway civilized. And let's not forget his daughter, who is apparently turning into a Slytherin version of Hermione. Geez, I hope she doesn't turn out a know-it-all version of Snape."

"Oh, dear god," Percy panicked covering his mouth in shock and horror at the idea.

"I think I'll ditch him next year, the git," Ron gasped, and elsewhere, the four humans taking refuge under Snape's roof sneezed at odd intervals.

Draco read and reread the letter in his hands. Professor Snape getting along with Potter, the very idea was absurd! But if it had come from anyone but Kiru, he'd have had his mother apparate him over to find out the truth of it all. Nonetheless, he was proud of his new friend for scaring the bodily waste out of the Muggle boy, and even more so now that Professor Snape was in on the boy's tortures. He grinned in anticipation – he couldn't wait to see how this turned out. He hastily penned a reply on the back, sending it back so he wouldn't get caught and his parents wouldn't figure it out.

"Dad!" Kiru yelled in shock, not knowing what was going on. "Dad!"

"Not now, I'm busy!" he yelled up from the cellar, but the small girl persisted. "Fine! I'll be up in a minute, just shut up!"

"I didn't do it," Dudley squeaked, waddling away from the wizard's black robes as soon as he saw him coming.

"Quiet, you," Snape snapped on his way up. He reached the bathroom door to find it locked, but her bedroom was empty. "Kiru?"

"In here," she called from the bathroom, and he unlocked it with a tap of his wand. He stopped short, almost backing back out before he saw what she was whining about – bloody underwear. His face must have had emotions, because Kiru immediately started crying. "Dad, I swear, I don't know what happened, I just started bleeding between my legs, and I didn't do anything wrong, I swear!"

"Enough," he snapped, closing the door behind him as he left her behind. He hadn't wanted to see that, but he knew someone better to explain it to the girl, and he saw a strange blue beetle floating down the hall. He had not left the windows open today, or last night for that matter.

He flicked his wand, sensing an animagus, and he was more than right. In front of him was none other than Rita Skeeter, who was looking at him terrified. He held his wand aloft, sending her own and her quill and papers flying. Dudley, who had just walked up to see what the commotion was, stood in her way of the exit gawking. Sensing that this woman had angered his new guardian in some way, Dudley stayed put to stop her in her tracks.

"Skeeter," Snape said coldly. "Unless you want to find your writing career ruined, I suggest you give yourself over to the ministry of magic to punish you how they see fit. Or, you can pretend you never saw any of this, and can leave me, my daughter, and my two charges alone and out of the spotlight for a year. Surely you can manage that?"

"I," she began, terrified of Dudley. He'd lost some weight, and his fat now looked more like muscle, at least. "I comply. I will not write a single word about anyone in your household at all."

"And that includes anyone who may be on the teaching staff at Hogwarts," Snape snarled, "and foreigners who aren't accustomed to our country yet."

"I comply," she begged, beginning to grovel at his feet. "Just don't turn me into the ministry!"

"I'm tempted to do just that. However, I will suffice to force you to make an unbreakable vow. Potter, Chessie, get up here," Snape called down, and the two raced up to meet them. "We have a spy in our midst."

"Rita Skeeter," Chessie growled angrily. "I'd recognize you anywhere, you're the one who writes a whole lot of bullshit in The Daily Prophet! What's she doing here?"

"Trying to get a good story," she retorted. "I almost had one, till hawk-nose found me."

"Chessie, your wand, please," Snape said nodding. "Potter, watch and learn. We're about to make a reporter make the Unbreakable Vow."

"No!" Rita snarled, and Severus pointed his wand at her throat. "Give me one good reason not to make you go to Azkaban right now!"

"I'll turn you into the ministry as an illegal animagus," the two wizards and Chessie said in unison.

"Do you, Rita Skeeter, swear not to write anything about Chessie Hitoi, or any other foreign born witches or wizards for the next decade?" Snape sneered. "Do you swear not to write anything about the staff at Hogwarts Witchcraft and Wizardry without my permission? Do you swear not to write anything about me, my daughter, or any other family members of mine without my permission?"

Rita had nodded and said a barely audible "I swear," at each question. A snake made of fire wrapped around their wrists as it did so. Snape smirked, knowing she wouldn't risk anything anymore, and watched her flee in cowardice, forcing her to leave her papers behind strewn everywhere. Chessie snorted in contempt, and glanced over at Severus, who was boiling angry now. He jerked his head towards the bathroom, looking downwards to the left, and Chessie's eyes narrowed.

"Are you implying something?" Chessie asked, and the Potions Master sighed at how thick-headed she could be. He let his hand fall on his left hip, putting the papers into a pile with a lazy flick of his right wrist. "I'll take that as a 'yes'. What's up, aside from that Yerou barging in here?"

"I think you know," Snape said looking at the bathroom door, and Chessie suddenly understood. "It's a girl thing, and I have no clue how to continue. Could you help her?"

"You forgot the magic word," Dudley said suddenly, and Snape's eyes locked onto him long enough for the boy to waddle away in terror once more.

"Of course, I'd love to, Snape-san," Chessie said as she entered the bathroom to tell the girl what was going on and what the hormones would do to her body once a month now. Snape sighed – two hormonal boys were bad enough to deal with, but Kiru getting her own hormone problem brought on a whole new level of issues.

Dudley began sobbing as he cleaned out the garden once more. He'd learned to fear Snape's rage just as he avoided Vernon and Petunia's. He frowned as he worked in the garden, missing his parents dearly. He'd lost more weight under this man than he gained in a summer, which was bad, and nobody had said anything about it. Not even his school friends, who had suddenly taken to avoiding his house to avoid the scary new "uncle". The story was that his mom had twin siblings that they didn't know existed, Harry's mom, who was dead, and their new guardian.

"I wish mum and dad were here," Dudley whined as Snape locked him into the cupboard that night for bed. He was now regretting everything he did to Harry, as the lanky boy had taken to making sure their new guardian repeated his offenses upon Dudley's mental, emotional, and social life. No friends, no video games, and worst of all, he was surrounded by freaks all the time. Yes, he thought, his father would bust a lung when he figured out what was going on.

"Too bad," Snape sneered through the door and triple locking it, although he knew the boy couldn't get out. He was tempted to put a warding charm on it, but instead settled for an alerting charm that would let him know when someone came into the home. "Your father's nowhere nearby, boy."