When she woke up the next morning, her phone was blinking. Fifteen missed calls for Josh. She felt horrible. She wasn't usually like that. She would say what had to be said. But she just couldn't this time. Sighing, she got up and went to the kitchen to make some breakfast. As she was eating, someone knocked on her door. Expecting it to be Josh, she took a deep breath, feeling the fight to come.
"Rick? Uuuhh Castle? What are you doing here?" she asked, really surprised to find him there at 8am on a Sunday.
"You can call me Rick you know. I don't even know why you call me Castle all the time …"
"Because it's more professional"
"But we're not at work now are we?"
"No" she answered, feeling stupid
"So you can call me Rick, Kate." He reasoned.
"Do you want to come in?" Kate asked, getting back from her surprise
" Uuh, sure … Is Josh here?" he asked tentatively
"No", she answered, smiling and letting him get in her apartment before closing the door behind him. "I was just having breakfast, you want some?"
"Why not, it is breakfast time after all" he said, looking at the clock on her microwave
"What do you want?" Kate asked, searching in her cupboards for a plate and cutlery.
"What you're having is fine…"
"OK, cereals it is" she said, pouring milk and passing him the box of chocolate puffs
"You know these are for children, right?" Rick laughed
"It's perfect for you then! And don't look at me like that, you know you want to do the games on the back of the box"
"How do you know? I always have to fight with Alexis at home"
"You should let your kid play Castle, you're too old for that" she said, laughing
"I'll let her have them if you promise to give me yours"
"What?"
"When you finish a box, you cut out the games and you give them to me" he answered, completely serious
"If it can make you happy" she said, still laughing when she saw his excited face
"You can do something else if you want me to be really happy" he said looking at her with a big, big smile.
"In your dreams, Rick" she said you're certainly in mine she added for herself.
"Oh you are!" he said, watching her blush
"Shut up and eat your breakfast!"
For the next ten minutes, they ate silently. Comfortable with each other. Kate didn't even mind that she was still in her PJs and Rick really appreciating the view of her in her really small tank top and her sleeping shorts. Was it even possible to have legs that long?
"Uh, Rick?" she asked suddenly
"Mmm" he answered, his mouth full of cereals
"Not that I don't enjoy the company but … why are you here?"
"Oh right!" he said after having swallowed everything . He picked a plastic bag from the floor and started getting things out of it. "My mother wanted me to give you this" he said, passing her DVDs of Temptation Lane. "She selected only those she is in, of course" he laughed. "And I wanted to give you this" he added, giving her a heavy pile of paper.
"What is it?" she asked
"My new book. Well, my manuscript anyway. I'd like you to read it before I send it before I give it to Gina"
"Really?" smiling for ear to ear
"Really" he answered. "I want you to be the first one to read it. Well … not really the first because Alexis proof-read it for me and of course I wrote it but … you know what I mean…."
"I know what you mean" she said, getting up and hugging him "thank you so much, you have no idea how much it means to me"
"Hey, it's not that big a deal" he said, noticing the tears forming in her eyes
"It is for me. I never told you but … I … your books … they … they helped me a lot after my mom's murder. She bought me the first one for my birthday just before her death. She even got it signed for me." She said, trying not to let her tears fall.
"I … I met your mom?" Rick asked, completely stunned
She left the kitchen and went to her bedroom. Rick didn't know what to do. Follow her? Stay in the kitchen and wait for her to come back. He had really no idea why she had left. He was desperately trying to remember when he could have met her mother but nothing came to mind. While he was searching his memory, Kate came back and put a book in front of him. His first book. Not his first best-seller crime-mystery novel, his very first book. He looked at her and, when she nodded, opened it at the first page. To Kate, Happy 18th birthday, Love, Rick Castle.
"Wow" was all he was able to say
"yeah"
"I … I'm really sorry but I don't remember it, I …"
"Hey it's ok" she said, putting her hand on his shoulder. Since he was sitting on a chair and she was standing next to him, for once she was the tallest one "I completely understand taht you don't remember everyone you signed a book for, it would be scary of you did. I just … wanted you to know, that's all."
"Thanks" he simply said, pulling her closer by putting an arm around her waist
They looked at each other. Each of them wanting desperately to kiss the other but both refraining. It was just wrong … for now.
"So … uh… do you have any plan for today? With Josh?" he asked, trying to break the awkward silence they were getting wrapped in.
"I didn't but now I do" Kate answered, taking the DVDs and the manuscript and going to the living room, Rick right behind her.
"Well … I should get going …I ….."
"Already?" When Kate realized what she had said, she blushed. It was starting to really annoy her. She was feeling like a girl. In a way it was refreshing, but it was mainly embarrassing. "I mean …"
"I know what you mean, but I promised I'd help Alexis look through the different college applications today"
"Ok"
As he was gathering his things, she seemed to want to tell him something.
"What?"
"Can … can I ask you something?" she asked, looking at the floor. He was really not used to seeing her so shy.
"You can ask me anything Kate, you know that" he said, getting closer to her and taking her hands in his.
"Tomorrow is … it's the … anniversary of my mother's…"
"I know" he said quietly, squeezing her hands
"Would you … would you come with me to the cemetery?"
"Are you sure?"
"I mean, if you don't want to it's fine I just …"
"Hey hey hey, Kate" he said, letting go of her hands to take her face in his hands "I would love to go with you, it's just that … I know you like to be alone for this kind of things and I …"
"I don't want to be alone anymore" she said, looking at him in the eyes "I need you there with me"
"I'll be there" he whispered, pulling her to him and kissed her hair.
"Thank you" she said, stepping back from his embrace "for everything"
"You're welcome" he answered. Seeing her so fragile, he wanted to kiss her so bad, to take all her pain away. But he couldn't. She was with Josh right? He stayed for her but he never seemed to be here when she needed someone. She deserved so much better …
" Well … I really have to go now. See you tomorrow?"
"Sure" she answered, smiling " what about we meet there around ten?"
"Ok, see you tomorrow at ten then" he said, squeezing her hand one last time before leaving.
In the morning, she watched all the episodes of Temptation Lane that Castle had brought. She ate a sandwich for lunch and then settled down to read his latest book, Heat Rises. After a light dinner, she headed to bed, intending to finish it. When she was about to get changed, she realized that she was still in her pajamas. She went directly to bed and continued to read. Around ten at night, Josh showed up. He used the spare key she had given him some months before and met her in her bedroom. He undressed and slipped under the cover next to her. She hadn't moved at all.
"Kate?"
"mmm" she answered, still reading, totally engrossed in the story
"baby I'm sorry for yesterday" Josh said, putting his hand on her thigh.
"Josh, what are you doing?" she asked, never taking her eyes of Rick's manuscript.
"I'm trying to apologize" he said, trying to kiss her.
"And I'm trying to read, get off me"
"Kate, what's going on? We need to talk…"
"Well, that will have to wait, I'm reading right now"
"I'll wait, I'm not leaving until I get some answers".
Without even realizing it, Josh fell asleep. He woke up two hours later and looked at Kate. She was still engrossed in her book. This is ridiculous he thought. In the morning, when he woke up again, Kate seemed to have finished the book. She was sleeping on her side of the bed, the book still in her hands, secrued against her chest. Josh looked at it. As soon as he saw Richard Castle written on the cover of the manuscript, he sat up in the bed. "This has to stop, NOW!" he thought, shaking Kate to wake her up.