Hello There! Now here is chapter four. Thank you again for all the amazing reviews! You guys make my life. Also please keep in mind this is angst so there are no butterflies and rainbows anytime soon and yes some of the characters are pricks *cough* JAke, BElla and Nessie *cough* But its my story and that is just the way the cookie crumbles.

Also I suggest listening to the songs posted. I do choose them specifically :) they are not super popular so I am hoping they may be brand new to some of you :) Anyway I will let you get to reading. Please enjoy!

Characters belong to S.M -.- which is bull

I'll sing it one last time for you
Then we really have to go
You've been the only thing that's right
In all I've done

And I can barely look at you
But every single time I do
I know we'll make it anywhere
Away from here

Light up, light up
As if you have a choice
Even if you cannot hear my voice
I'll be right beside you, dear

Louder, louder
And we'll run for our lives
I can hardly speak, I understand
Why you can't raise your voice to say

To think I might not see those eyes
Makes it so hard not to cry
And as we say our long goodbyes
I nearly do

Light up, light up
As if you have a choice
Even if you cannot hear my voice
I'll be right beside you, dear

Louder, louder
And we'll run for our lives
I can hardly speak, I understand
Why you can't raise your voice to say

Slower, slower
We don't have time for that
All I want is to find an easier way
To get out of our little heads

Have heart, my dear
We're bound to be afraid
Even if it's just for a few days
Making up for all this mess

Light up, light up
As if you have a choice
Even if you cannot hear my voice
I'll be right beside you, dear

Run/ Snow patrol

Run.

The house felt cold, lifeless and foreign. Each wall was painted the same neutral off white colour. Jake traced the south wall with his eyes; he followed it all the way up to the cathedral like ceilings. Everyone else was in a busy around him. The denali clan were bringing in box after box and a regular speed. It had something to do with Bella wanting a natural move for Nessie. Like somehow, moving at a mortal pace would make her more human. However, the young girl was no where to be seen anyway. Nessie had grown tired of Jake's attitude and had gone out hunting with Tanya leaving him alone in the massive house with strangers and her parents. He had never felt so alone. The still air chilled him to the bone and he felt like an outsider.

This was not what he wanted.

Jacob wasn't sure what he pictured. But this was not it. He knew that it wouldn't be picture perfect but this, this was something else entirely. It was like he was a guest in his own life.

"Jake, would you like to see your room?" Jacob spun around to see Bella waiting impatiently in the hall way at the edge of the stairs. One had was on her hip while the other was lifted to her face as she looked at her perfectly painted nails in boredom. Jacob gave the room one last once over before shoving his hands in his pockets and following his former best friend up the winding stair case. In usual Cullen fashion the house was over the top and massive. Impractical and like nothing he had ever lived in before. This was not home to Jacob. A home should have been some little house out in the woods with an old wood stove and a big front porch. It would have been somewhere to seek comfort. This house seemed more like a hospital than a home for a young child and her family.

"Your room is the one on the left, across from Renesme's naturally." Jacob gave Bella a quick nod in understanding before twisting the door knob open and stepping into his new room. But to Jacob it felt like he was stepping into his new life, being forced to forget everything else he knew. He felt like he was expected to welcome all these changes with open arms and without a single look back.

This room felt exactly like the living room down stairs. Cold and draining. Beside the king size bed there was a small desk with a framed picture of Nessie and Bella. On the other side of the room there was a closet full of brand new designer clothes. Clothes he didn't want. Clothes he didn't ask for.

"We figured you should fit in with us, so you will have to try and give up the ratty old shorts and shirtless look Jake." Bella's voice seemed mocking as she gave Jacob a quick once over before turning on her heel and leaving him alone in his new room. He waited until the clicking of her heels faded before he broke down.

"Leah"

Her name left his lips in a strangled sob as he threw himself onto his bed, both of his fists clenching the bed sheets as he buried his face into the plush mattress. He wondered where she was and what she was doing. Was she falling apart like he was? Did she feel that constant painful ache in her chest like he had for weeks? Hell, he couldn't even remember how long it had been since he had seen her face but it felt like a life time.

"Leah"

Jacob tucked his knees up towards his chest and hugged a pillow close to his face. He was falling apart and it was happening faster that he thought possible. Hot tears ran down his face as he sobbed her name over and over. It became his prayer. His only guiding light in this new life. The only thing he kept with him from his past. The only thing he refused to let go of.

Sleep was closing in on Jacob when he heard a swift but gentle knock on his door. Jacob sat up quickly scrubbing his face free of tears before facing the unwanted visitor.

"Jacob, I- I know how hard this is for you. Well I can only imagine and I am sorry that this is how things turned out. But I have my cell phone on me and perhaps you would like to try and give your friends a call. Give Leah a call."

Edward quietly stepped forward handing Jacob the phone. Edward picked up Jacob's other hand, placing it over the screen making Jacob cradle the device as if it was his saving grace and with a nod he left him to decide. The phone felt like a hundred pounds in his hand and so did the decision that was looming over him.

Jacob's hands began to shake as he pressed the familiar digits into the phone. With a deep breath the brought his shaking hand up to his ear and waited.

"Hello?"

With one simple word Jacob's world came to a halt. He didn't know how to proceed. How would he ever be able to fix this?

"Hello?"

The repeated word snatched Jacob out of his musings. He took a deep breath and cleared his throat but no words came out. It was as if he was drowning and there was no way to reach the surface. All he needed was one little word. One god forsaken sound and then he could figure the rest out. But damn it his mind just wouldn't follow through.

Come on Jake

Jesus man pull it together!

Just as Jacob opened his mouth, he heard the resounding click.

"You are such a fucking idiot." He closed his eyes and lifted the phone to his forehead, hitting himself repeatedly with it. Jacob took another lung full of air before hitting the redial button. He heard the dial tone and as soon as he noticed the other line pick up he blurted the only thing that had been in his mind.

"Leah"

There was a distinct pause before he heard anything on the other line.

"Jake man, is that you?"

"Seth, yea it's me." Jacob tried his best not to sound disappointed. But he knew it leaked through. How could it not, he just had the chance to say what needed to be said only minutes ago and now he wasn't sure if he would get the chance again.

"Did you just call? Cause Leah said- cause we just had a random phone call." Seth's voice dropped in volume and he seemed worried. Jacob assumed Leah was somewhere nearby and he was now sure he was the last person she wanted to have contact with.

"Yea that was me, I was hoping to ugh, talk to Lee" He could hear Seth sigh on the other side of the phone and he knew then that there was no way Seth Clearwater would allow him to have any contact with his sister.

"Jake listen, I just don't think that's a good idea. Yea know man. It has been pretty rough on her and I am just not sure if she is ready to talk to you. I know you didn't mean for things to get out of hand like this. But you commanded her Jake. You took her choices away and that's all she had left. I know you really don't want to hear this but I think it's best if you don't call here again for a while okay? I just, I need to protect her. I've done a shit job over these past few years and I know that. But this time I need to be her brother, be her support. Even if that means protecting her from you."

Jacob felt like he had been punched in the gut. Leah needed protection, from him. The very thought shook him to the core. Little Seth Clearwater had to protect his sister from him.

"Ugh yea Seth I get it. Just um, take care alright and just please take care of her. Please try and tell her how sorry I am and I will be home soon and when I am I will fix this. If she wants to go to England she can. Hell I'll even fly her to Cancun if it will help. Just please let her know that I love her and I promise that she will have whatever future she wants."

Jacobs hand had crept up his chest until it lay over his heart. He could feel the painful thudding through his entire ribcage. It was so painful he had to concentrate on his breathing so he wouldn't pass out.

"Sure thing Jake, I ugh, I guess I'll talk to you later. I'll say hi to your dad for ya. Say hi to Ed for me." And with that the line went dead.

Jacob was alone again.

Alone with his breaking heart and his cold white room.

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