Alice

I sat by as Shun caught Christina up on everything that's happened since his absence. It amazed me how he didn't miss a single detail; other than what all happened while he was unconscious. He would always remember the past several days. Every minute, every second, was etched in his memories from now on. Whether bad or good, they were there. And most of them were pretty bad.

While Shun continued to talk, I was distracting myself by speaking to the kids in the orphanage. They were happy to see me again, although I couldn't enjoy their reactions because I was too caught up in the fact that one of them was gone. Shun had told me about Sarah's poisoning from the water that had been ruined by the Officials.

Thankfully, she had been the only one to fall victim. But that was still one too many. I had noticed when we walked into the house, Shun's eyes immediately went to one of the corners that had a pile of blankets in it. In his face, I could see the last memory he had of what was there.

It wasn't him laying there when I stayed the night out in the Wastelands. It was of Sarah. I could see the little girl laying on the now balled up blankets, her eyes crying as the poison hurt her more and more. Shun had quickly turned away before Christina could notice what he was looking at.

When that fake smile crossed his face, I felt sorry for him. He was trying to act fine, but that smile proved how damaged he was inside. Slowly, day by day, his life was being torn apart like everyone else's. Except, maybe a little bit faster. Shun finally finished telling Christina his side of the story.

She stared at him, shocked that he had gone through all of that within only a couple of days. One of the younger children walked up to her, crying and begging for Christina to notice him. She gave him a few seconds of comfort; enough to calm him and stop his crying.

The little boy then went on his way and ran off into another room. Christina reverted her attention to Shun. "That's insane. I can't believe that the Officials are doing something like this." I had heard my fair share of those words the past couple of days.

It was easy to believe it when you heard it enough; and saw it for yourself. Behind me, I heard Julie and Runo gawking over the kids that were running around. They were going on and on about how cute they were, and the kids seemed to be eating the attention up.

Murucho was trying to spark up a conversation with Dan, who was blatantly ignoring the short blonde. Dan really looked like he didn't want to be here. Not one bit. I let out an exasperated sigh. When will he learn? I returned to listening to Shun and Christina's conversation.

They had changed topics. Well, almost. It still involved the Officials. Shun looked at her and said seriously, "You and the others aren't safe here. The Officials will be back here in no time so they can finish the job they started." Christina looked at him as if he had slapped her in the face. "You really suggest leaving? Where do we go? We can't go to the City, that would be an obvious bad idea. And if we go into the Wastelands, we might as well call ourselves dead."

Shun's expression only got more serious. "You don't understand, Christina. We have a map, a designated route to follow that will stop at the mountains. It was made for just this exact scenario. You have to see reason and come with us. We can't stay here," he said without taking any breaths.

It was clear, Shun wasn't leaving without them. He would either take them with us, or stay behind and die with them. Christina shook her head slowly. "Shun, I'm sorry. But whether we go or not, our chances of making it are very low. You of all people know what I'm talking about. You've seen just as many people die in the Wastelands as I have."

Shun slammed his hand down on the kitchen table where the two of them were sitting at. Personally, I thought it would have broken, but it stayed intact. "I'm not going to lose anymore you guys," he said defiantly. The whole house was silent. None of us said anything, not even the kids that had been running around and laughing. He slowly returned back to his seat, taking in a calming breath so he wouldn't explode like that again.

Christina smiled sadly at him and said, "I don't want to lose anybody else either, Shun. But the odds are against right now, and they aren't any better out in the Wastelands. Besides, most of the other Outcasts are in no shape for that kind of journey." The tension in the room was thick.

I held my breath, waiting for whatever would happen next. I could understand Christina's logic, but she had to understand what was at risk. Staying behind would ensure a certain death by the Officials, and a brutally painful death at that. But at least out in the Wastelands, there was a chance that they could make it to the end of our journey.

Shun closed his eyes and stood up from the table. "I'll be outside," he said coldly. He walked past all of us, not making any kind of eye contact. When he was out of the house, I heard Christina sigh. I looked at her in time to see her shaking her head. I was glancing back at forth at the door and Christina, then got up and hurried outside.

Shun

I had never known Christina to be so stubborn like this. She had always been open to reason, so what made this any different. I could understand if she was scared after the attack from the Officials, but to stay behind and wait for them to come back was something completely different.

Yeah, a lot of the Outcasts were too old or weak to make the entire trip, but at least they wouldn't be left behind and brutally killed. Christina and the kids had the best chance of making the trek, but she didn't want to hand them over to the Wastelands. I needed to relax and calm down so I could try and find a different approach to convincing Christina to change her mind.

But there would be no hope of that as long as I was still worked up. A few people that were outside, noticed my presence. Everyone knew that I was back though, so they just took a glance and went on about their business. I sighed and walked up the incline behind the orphanage. Now that I was at the top of the little hill, I sat down on the blackened, flat ground.

An immediate rush of calm came over me as I took in the memories of this place. The last one I could recall, was when I showed Alice the mountains that the hill faced. I smiled, but it slowly faded. I didn't want to lose all the memories of my life that I held out here.

Even if they weren't the best by most people's standards, they were my life. Days that I had spent growing up. My hand ran across the ground I was sitting on. The tips of my fingers felt small rocks underneath them. I found myself picking up one of the rocks, looking at it, then chunking it out into the Wastelands in front of me. Throwing the rock was a slight relief of stress, but it would take a lot more to calm me down.

I was about to throw another, when I heard somebody's voice behind me. "I thought I'd find you up here." I turned around and found Alice standing there. I proceeded to throw the rock in my hand while she took a seat next to me. She pulled the new map out of her dress pocket, and unfolded it.

Her eyes gazed at the mountain drawn on the paper, then they shifted to the actual thing in front of us. "That's where we're going." I threw another rock. "Yeah, but not all of us." I watched the rock bounce out into the Wastelands. It quickly lost momentum and remained still in its new resting place.

Alice continued to look at the map when she said, "I know you want Christina and the others to come along with us, but it's kind of up to them if they want to go or not. I mean, you can't exactly force them to join us." I had run out of rocks next to me, and wished I had more to throw so I could keep my mind preoccupied.

"I know I can't force them. What's getting to me is the fact that they'd rather sit around and let the Officials take their lives." It didn't make any sense to me. Most of them were already starving, so it wouldn't be any different for them if they followed us through the Wastelands.

We had survived this long, I was sure we could survive a little bit longer. Alice said, "You can keep trying to convince Christina to get the other Outcasts to go with us, but I'm just telling you this now. You'll probably be speaking on deaf ears. I'm not saying I want to leave them behind, because I don't. But it looks like Christina has her mind well made up." Alice's words rang true.

When Christina thought it was in the best interest of the Outcasts, she stuck alongside it. Alice stood up, dirt falling from the skirt of her dress. "You stay out here and keep cooling down. I'll go and try and help you change her mind." Alice walked down the small hill, leaving me to myself.

I tilted my head back to look up at the sky. A large bird, which looked like a hawk, was flying around under the brightly burning sun. I had to shield my eyes so I could continue to look up without becoming blind. I sat out on that hill till the sun was starting to vanish behind the mountains, just like it did every evening.

Feeling more calm than before, I got up and slid down the small incline that made up the hill. When I walked back into the orphanage, I found Alice sitting at the kitchen table with Christina; the others were just standing around with their arms folded. Christina saw me and said, "You're not getting me to change my mind."

Alice looked at me and added on, "I've been trying to convince her, but it's not working." Murucho was looking out of the window; he had to stand on the tips of his toes in order to get his eyes above the frame. He said nervously, "Uh, guys. I think we should get going."

We all looked at the short blonde, then moved to look out the window. With a clear view of the City, we could see the gate opening on the other side, and Officials were gathering around. They were coming for here, there was no doubt about that. This would be my final chance to try and to convince Christina.

"They're about to be here in a matter of minutes. And when they get here, they aren't going to take any survivors. Do you still want to have everyone stay behind and face that?" Christina held a steady gaze with me and said, "I know you may not think it's the right thing to do, but…..It doesn't matter where we go. They're going to follow us. It'll be best for everyone, including you and your group, if we stay behind."

Now I saw her true motives. It was just like the old couple back in the City; Christina wanted to give us a chance. She knew that if we took all of the Outcasts with us, the Officials would be right on our scents. Right now, they had no proof we had been here, and it was best if it stayed that way.

This fact hadn't even crossed my mind. I had been too busy trying to get them to follow us, that I wasn't thinking through every outcome possible. "Are you sure, Christina?" She nodded and said to me, "I'm sure. Besides, there's nothing out there for me anymore."

A single tear spilled over her eye, and one did the same to me. I had known her a good portion of my life, and it would be difficult to leave her behind. It was going to be difficult to leave any of this behind. "You all need to get out of here before they show up," she told us.

All of our group hurried out and I said a final good-bye to her and the kids who had followed us outside. A few more farewells were exchanged with the Outcasts who were standing outside of their homes. They said how they wished us well on our trip. I didn't have it in me to wish them well back.

I knew what was coming for them, and didn't want to feel like a liar; I already felt like a traitor to them. Murucho pointed in the direction the map told us to go, and we headed out. I didn't look back, no matter how much I wanted to.

Alice skipped up next to me and said, "I know this has to be hard for you, but they say it's for the best." I know. I wasn't able to find my words. We walked a way, and the cluster of houses started to grow smaller in the distance. The setting sun turned the sky a deep mixture of blue and purple, and orange light came from low on the other side of the mountains like flames.

We came to a halt at a lone tree in the middle of the Wastelands. Its black branches spread out into the air like fingers and arms reaching for a hand that would never grab them back. There was a flapping, and a crow landed on one of the limbs.

It stared at us, then cawed and took off in the direction we had come from. Chills went up my spin when I realized, I hadn't stopped the dream I had. I had only gotten away from it before I could witness it.

chapter title based off of the song Crossroads by Dead By April. ah. another chapter done. time to reward myself with a snack. read, review, and other things. ~Copperpelt~