*Duckes behind the couch* Okay, I'm late. I know that, you know that, we all know that, now can we get on? Thank you.
So yeah, I'm late and extreamly sorry for that but what can I say? RL and muse being an utter diva made me do it!
Anyway, on to the story- this was supposed to be the last chap, however the boys didn't want to corporate and so this isn't the last one... so sad.

On the good side, all our problems will be solved in this chap and the next one will be mostly fluff and well, NC-17 rated stuff so yeah.

Disclaimer: Not mine, or this will be canon and the song belongs to Jessie J.

Have fun!

I know it's time that I learn to
Treat the people I love like I wanna be loved
This is a lesson to learn

"Merlin… Please…" Arthur didn't mean for his voice to come out so broken, so desperate; but as Merlin wrenched his hand free from Arthur's grip he realized that that what he was.

"No…" He said again and reached for Merlin's hand while Merlin took another step back, further away from Arthur.

"I can't Arthur." He whispered. "Not anymore, I-"

"Please Merlin, give me another chance, I-" Arthur drew in a ragged breathe. "I promise it will get better, I will get better, I-"

Merlin kept on shaking his head as tears flew down his cheeks.

"No Merlin, please don't, stop that, please, I love you, I, I need you, can't you give us a chance?" Arthur knew he was begging but he was beyond that, well beyond caring about things like his pride or honor as long as Merlin came back to Camelot with him.

"I can't do it Arthur, I can't-" He chocked down and took another step back, further away from Arthur and deeper into the woods.

"I'll change Merlin, I promise, just, just please…" Arthur tried again as Merlin took more and more steps into the woods.

"Goodbye Arthur." He whispered as he turned around and ran into the forest, vanishing between the woods.

"No!" Arthur's eyes snapped open and he tore away from his bed, his body covered in cold sweat as he opened the connecting door with a bang.

Merlin was sleeping peacefully in the small bed and didn't twitch as the door crashed against the opposite wall.

Arthur staggered to Merlin's bed and sank down beside him, clutching Merlin's hand between his hands.

"I will never let that happen to us, we will be okay, you'll see." He whispered to Merlin's skin.

"I promise."

And I hate that I let you down
And I feel so bad about it

It's been three months since Merlin was struck with Mordred's poison and still there was no change, Arthur did his best to pretend that everything was just the same but these who knew him, these closest to him, they knew better.

Arthur was a shadow of his former self; he did what he had to do to ensure his people didn't suffer and his kingdom prospered but other than that there was nothing more, he rarely smiled or laughed and a constant shadow lingered in his eyes.

"The treaty with west hamelfund has been signed my lord and the tribute will be sent in the next couple of days."

"Excellent." Arthur said; his voice gruff and Gwen and Lance exchanged looks.

"What of the sickness in the northern villages?"

"The cure we have sent seemed to help sire," Gaius's voice answered, the old man as tired and worn out as Arthur felt. "There have been no reports on new deaths."

"Good, good." Arthur said distractedly, his mind wandering back to Merlin.

"Sire, there has been news regarding the treaty with South Embledor-"

Arthur's eyes narrowed and his mind whispered one word: Gwaine.

"And?" He said, his voice low.

"Sir Gwaine reported that it is going on surprisingly well and that he expects to be back in the next two months."

"Did he now?" Arthur said, ignoring the troubled looks of his court.

Gwen coughed from her place beside him and smiled at the room.

"I believe the meeting is over gentleman, the council will reassemble tomorrow morning."

The courtiers nodded and bowed to their sovereign as they all but fled the room.

The minute the doors closed after the last noble Gwen turned to Arthur, her face distorted.

"Arthur! He is one of your knights and your ambassador! You cannot talk that way in front of the council! You are the one who-"

"He is wrong if he thinks I will allow him anywhere near Merlin!" Arthur spat savagely.

Lance sighed and took a step forward. "Sire, Merlin never saw Gwaine as anything more that a good friend, maybe you should-"

"No!" Arthur yelled and rose from his throne, his mind replaying Merlin's broken face as Gwaine rode out of the city, he failed him then, allowing the jealousy that coursed like venom through his veins to consume every rational thought, the need to have Merlin for himself stronger than anything else, stronger than any logic.

He knew he shouldn't have done that, the nights after sending Gwaine away were filled with regret and shame battling for dominance in his mind and his conscience never letting him forget.

"Maybe you should rest sire," Gaius's kind voice broke through Arthur's thoughts.

"You seem a bit troubled;" A pause. "More so than usual, that is."

Arthur nodded. "You are right Gaius, it's been a, a tough night."

Gaius nodded as Arthur rose from his throne; he sent a weak smile towards Gwen and Lance and left the hall.

Arthur stood shock still for a moment, his mind refusing to decipher what his eyes were seeing as he stared at the two unconscious guards outside his room and then like a tidal wave that crashed at the shore time returned to its normal flow and Arthur was running towards his chambers and swinging the doors open.

"No, no, no, please god no…" He kept mumbling as he dashed through his room and into Merlin's only to find Merlin's bed… empty.

"Gaius?" A soft voice called and Gaius froze. It couldn't be, it couldn't be-

"Merlin?" Gaius asked softly, too scared to turn around and find thin air.

A chocked laugh sounded from behind him and then he was being swung around to face-

"Merlin." Gaius's arms came immediately to embrace the young man.

"My boy… my boy… I thought I lost you." He mumbled into Merlin's hair.

Merlin was shaking his head and his arms tightened around Gaius's form.

"Never. I just needed time."

"You certainly took your time my boy." Gaius said with a frown as he pulled back to look at Merlin. "Are you glowing?"

Merlin shrugged. "I might be, I just got my magic back and well, I have it from an authorized source that it will be stronger than ever."

"Authorized source?" Gaius asked as he led Merlin to sit down.

"Destiny." Merlin said grimly and Gaius flinched.

"Merlin-"

"It's over. I fulfilled my destiny in her eyes and I'm free. I intend to go to the druids Gaius and-"

"And leave Camelot? Merlin you can't!"

"Why not?" Merlin shrugged. "There is nothing for me here, sides you, and well, I'd rather not have to face my own execution." He finished off with another shrug.

"Execution?" Gaius exclaimed. "Merlin what on earth are you on about?"

"Arthur knows about my magic Gaius! Of course I will be facing my own execution! That's why I left his chambers the minute I was awake!"

"You left his… So Arthur has no idea that…" Gaius trailed off and his eyes widened. "The poor boy…"

"What?" Merlin asked confused.

"Merlin, Arthur is-"

Before Gaius finished his sentence the door banged open and Arthur ran in, his face flushed and his eyes a bit wild.

"Gaius, it's-" He stopped mid sentence, his eyes widening and then he let out a shuddered breathe.

"Merlin…" He whispered and took a step towards him only to stop mid step when Merlin got up and took a step back.

"Merlin?" He breathed out, his voice full of pain.

Merlin swallowed and stared at him, all the heartache from the last months, years, life flooding his senses.

"Arthur…" He gasped.

"You're… oh god you're alive!" Arthur breathed at last and closed the distance between them, enveloping Merlin in a crushing hug.

Merlin's widened eyes caught sight of Gaius's smiling face and he frowned at him from over Arthur's shoulder.

"I'll leave you to it sire." Gaius mumbled bemusedly before he left the chambers and closed the door behind him.

Merlin shuddered when Arthur's hands started traveling up and down his arms and back.

"Arthur, what, err, what are you doing?" Merlin asked to the side of Arthur's face.

"Making sure you're alive you idiot," Arthur grumbled and tightened his hold on Merlin.

"You've been in a magical coma for the last three months!"

Merlin pushed against him. "Three months? That doesn't make sense, I-"

"Trust me Merlin," Arthur breathed against the skin of his neck, raising the hairs there. "I counted every bloody hour."

And I hate that I made you think
That the trust we had is broken

"Trust you?" Merlin echoed after him and pushed against him again, harder and Arthur released him a bit, staring at Merlin's contorted face.

"What?" He asked confused as Merlin pushed him again.

"Merlin what are you doing?" He asked when Merlin didn't stop pushing him.

"I'm getting away from you!" Merlin retorted back and pushed again, this time succeeding as Arthur finally let go, too shocked to do anything more than stare.

"Why would you do that?" He asked numb.

Merlin stopped and stared at him. "What do you mean why? I can't, you, I-" He floundered around for a moment before he stopped and stared at Arthur.

"I have magic!" He finally yelled.

Arthur lifted one, unimpressed eyebrow and crossed his hands over his chest, keeping them from reaching over for Merlin's agitated form.

"I know." Arthur said slowly.

"I know you know you ass!" Merlin exclaimed and Arthur frowned.

"So what are you on about Merlin?" He asked carefully.

"What am I on about?" Merlin echoed after him.

"Yes." Arthur said again, very slowly, as he wondered if maybe it would be better for Gaius to check Merlin's head for injuries, just in case.

"You are going to execute me!" Merlin cried out and drove Arthur's wandering mind back to the room.

"What?" Arthur screeched. "What are you talking about Merlin?"

Merlin stared at him for a moment before he flagged down and sat on the bench, his head between his hands.

"I have magic Arthur, and I hid it from you and now that you know you are going to kill me, and I don't want you to, but I won't do anything to stop you because I deserve it for being the lying monster that I'm but I, I don't want to die Arthur, I don't…" Merlin lifted his head and Arthur's heart broke all over again when he saw the broken expression in Merlin's eyes, the hollow emptiness.

"I'll leave Arthur, I promise, I'll leave Camelot and you'll never see me again and I'll-"

"Shut up Merlin." Arthur said, his own voice gruff with unshed tears as he realized that Merlin, his Merlin was so convinced that Arthur couldn't forgive him, wouldn't forgive him…

"You honestly think that I would have you executed?" Arthur asked softly, his fingers wiping the tears that kept flowing down Merlin's cheeks.

Merlin swallowed again and nodded.

"Merlin…" Arthur said softly and cupped Merlin's face with both his hands.

Merlin let out a ragged breath and leaned into the touch.

"My Merlin… I could never have you executed; I love you too much to live without you." Arthur said with a rueful smile, finally letting the words out of his mouth after months and years of knowing them.

Merlin stared at him for a moment before he started shaking his head.

"No, no you're not, you can't, why are you doing this Arthur? Why are you doing this…"

I gotta change if I wanna keep you forever
I promise that I'm gonna try

"You don't believe me?" Arthur asked him, ready to prove his love in whatever way Merlin would ask of him.

Merlin let loose an empty laugh. "Of course I don't believe you!" He exclaimed and tried to free his face from Arthur's hold.

"You are married! To Gwen! And, and-"

"Camelot needed a queen." Arthur said quietly. "I should have told you before I married her; I should have told you everything before but… I wasn't thinking…"

Merlin was shaking his head again. "That can't be true, it can't be true, Arthur you can't…" He trailed off as the tears started flowing again.

"Can't what? Love you more than life themselves? Need you by my side more than anyone else? Know about your magic and everything you did for me and regret everything you had to suffer alone for my sake? Pick your choice Merlin and I'll prove you wrong." Arthur said as he rose slowly to his feet, dragging Merlin up with him and into a loose embrace.

"I know how much you suffered my love, I know and I'm sorry, more sorry than you'll ever know and I promise you that I'm going to change everything now, a treaty is being signed with the druids and the ban on magic has been lifted while you were sleeping and-"

"Am I dead?" Merlin asked suddenly, his voice weary.

"What?" Arthur asked, confused.

"I must be dead because this can't be happening. After five years of being in love with you, which okay I'll admit for the first three I had no idea I was in love with you but that's not the point, you can't just pop in and say 'oh Merlin, by the way, I love you and I only married Gwen for the sake of the kingdom and I didn't mean to rip your heart out or anything like that so give me another chance yeah?' You just can't do that! So this means I'm dead, and that's so not fair." Merlin concluded in a mellow tone as he slumped in Arthur's arms.

Arthur stood shock still for a moment before he started laughing, startling Merlin from where he was mumbling to himself on Arthur's shoulder.

I'm not a saint, no not at all
But what I did, that wasn't cool
But I swear that I'll never do that again to you

"You are not dead Merlin, trust me, I wouldn't have allowed you to die."

Merlin was staring at him with wide eyes and a hopeful glint in his eyes.

"I know that I did a lot of things wrong and I made so many mistakes that I can't even count them all but I do love you Merlin and I will do anything you'll ask me to prove that I'm serious, anything." Arthur said and leaned in to press a soft kiss on the corner of Merlin's lips, not trusting himself to do more than that.

"Arthur…" Merlin sighed and lifted his hand to caress Arthur's cheek.

"You are not lying?" He asked softly.

"Never Merlin, never again, I swear."

"So you really do love me?" He asked, that glint of hope burning stronger by the second.

Arthur smiled and leaned his forehead against Merlin's.

"I really do love you, more than anything."

"And you really aren't going to execute me?"

"Never!" Arthur cried out, anguished.

"Well," Merlin started and leaned closer. "That's good because I really love you too and I'm sort of attached to my head." He added softly.

Arthur let loose a shaky laugh and tightened his arms around Merlin, drawing him closer.

"I'm attached to your head as well, and the rest of you obviously." He whispered and pressed another kiss to the corner of Merlin's mouth, this time not moving away.

"Good." Merlin whispered back and moved his head to the side so that Arthur's lips touched his.

"Excellent."

Arthur answered and kissed him.

So... *swings from side to side* how was it?

The more you'll R&R the faster I'll write!