AUTHOR'S NOTE: I'm a horrible author , I have NO time to update !D; Sorry everyone . A huuuge thank you to my amazing reviewer Xandman216 , I totally agree , Randy is too hard on himself ;[ And Wade is a total JERK (at least in this story) . And another thank you to a new reviewer , KimmieCena , thank you so much for the compliment , it made me feel pretty optimistic and positive about this story [: Lastly , thank you BingoBaby , you're too kind ! Anyways , onwards !

-xoxo

Katherine Nicotra

Chapter 13: Pushing Me to the Brink

RANDY'S POV-

I woke up feeling groggy. I could tell that it was midday from the heat in the hotel room. I opened my eyes, and then I saw her. Istella.

The first girl that I had loved in seven years.

I shook my head slowly. My feelings- hell, I had no feelings until she had come into my life- were going to be her downfall. I had to have a clean break from her. No friendship, nothing. I'd do that starting now.

Extricating my arms from her small frame, I gently rolled out of bed. I stood up, looking down at her sleeping form. She truly looked angelic, her hair splayed about, her long eyelashes small wings. Her beautiful, soft lips set in a cute pout. She was still wearing my shirt with some shorts. She was truly angelic.

I grabbed my bags, pulling them into the living room and shutting the door behind myself. I clutched the doorknob hard, letting out a deep breath. It had taken all my strength to tear my gaze from her. Pulling a black shirt from my bag, I slipped it on. I took one last look at the bedroom door, grabbed my bags, and left the room.

I knocked on the hotel room door two rooms away. Not receiving an answer, I knocked harder. Finally, Cody answered the door, only wearing boxers. He moved aside with a grumbled greeting, allowing me in, and I stopped after a few steps, hearing the door close behind me.

"Could you put some clothes on?" I snapped as Cody reappeared in front of me. He jumped in surprise and nodded.

"You don't have you yell, you know," he mumbled, slipping into the bedroom. I left my bags and followed him inside, seeing Ted asleep in the other bed. I was already annoyed about the decision I had to make, and seeing Ted so blissfully unaware... well, it struck a nerve.

"DIBIASE, GET YOUR ASS OUT OF BED!" I hollered, causing him to jump up and fall out of bed. I heard Cody snicker, and shot him a death glare, silencing him. He had thankfully pulled on a black tshirt and jeans.

"Fuck, Randy! What the hell is your problem?" Ted stared at me angrily, and to tell the truth, I had no idea. I ignored his question, closing my eyes and pinching the bridge of my nose.

"I need you two to switch rooms with me and take care of Istella. Sheamus tried to... attack... her again, and I can't be bothered with her." I didn't open my eyes at all, trying to control my anger.

"You were getting along fine before. What happened? And what happened to Sheamus?" I listened to Cody's questions, feeling weird.

"Stop asking questions. Sheamus was unconscious last time I checked. Here's my keycards, now give me yours." I held my keycards out, and Ted took them, going to the dresser to pick up his cards. He handed them to me, and I pocketed them.

"Randy, could I talk to you outside?" Ted motioned to the door, and against my better judgment, I nodded. Following him out, I braced myself. Ted turned, looking up at me, and he seemed sympathetic. "What's really wrong, Randy? Tell me. And don't show me that tough act, because I'm not buying it!"

"Ted it's nothing. Drop it." I spoke firmly, but Ted just laughed bitterly.

"Wow, maybe it is nothing. Your ego is just too fucking big." He shook his head, looking at me as if I was odious, and my temper flared. I took a step towards him, an angry growl ripping through my teeth as I clenched my fists. Ted's angry gaze faltered, and he took a step back.

"Do you know how it feels..." I paused momentarily, shaking my head to clear my thoughts. "Do you know how it feels, knowing that a girl, who's the first person that you have loved in seven years, almost got raped because of someone holding a fucking grudge? Do you? The more friendly I get, the more danger she's in. I have to hate her, so Barrett doesn't hurt like he hurt Sam!" I was whispering feverishly, my whole body red-hot and clammy from my words. Ted's face was one of shock as he processed everything.

"Barrett... Wade Barrett hurt Sam? Did he have anything to do with her death?" Ted shook his head, looking surprised and confused, but I caught a glimmer of knowing. "Wait... you love Istella?" He looked floored, and I grimaced as I felt the pain of leaving her. I also couldn't help noticing his lack of shock regarding Wade. He knew, but I wouldn't confront him. Not now.

"Please, Ted... please don't say a word. You're the only one who knows all this. I know you know." I felt like there were a ton of bricks toppling onto me, and Ted put a firm hand on my shoulder.

"You should've told me earlier, it's not good to keep this kind of stuff bottled up. You can count on me, Randy. I'm here for you and I wont say a word. Just like I haven't for the past few years." I felt a little better knowing that my secrets were safe. "Hey... don't you think it'll hurt Istella more if you just leave her? Protecting her would be better than just leaving her upset and vulnerable."

"No. I'm doing the right thing." It was like I was convincing myself more than Ted, but I didn't care.

"Randy, from what little I know, it seems like Barrett tried to hurt Istella regardless of either of your feelings towards each other. You sure about this?" He watched me closely, and I nodded.

"I'm sure. Now go take care of her." I walked to the couch and relaxed, trying to get Istella out of my mind.

"Alright." I heard noises, and 5 minutes later, Ted and Cody were at the front door.

"Bye," Cody said. I lifted a hand in acknowledgment, and groaned after the door shut behind them. What kind of a mess had I gotten Istella into?

ISTELLA'S POV-

I walked with Ted to the gym, feeling a mixture of nervousness and confusion. Once I had woken up, Randy was gone, and Ted had filled me in about them switching rooms. I didn't understand why, and I hadn't seen Randy yet. I opted not to ask Ted the reason.

As we reached the gym, my breath caught in my throat. Wade was benching in the gym. Fear rose up in me, but Ted put a reassuring arm around my shoulders. For some weird reason, he was being protective, like he was my bodyguard.

"Don't worry Stella, I'm here." Ted knew about what had happened with Wade and Sheamus in minor detail, so he understood my fear. We walked to the other side of the gym. Ted got on a treadmill. He motioned to the bench beside him, and I sat down stiffly. For some reason, Ted's company was not nearly as comfortong as Randy, though Ted was being kind. I closed my eyes, trying to relax.

"Hello, DiBiase." I flinched at the clipped, cool voice, and slowly opened my eyes to see Wade. He had three other men flanking, who I recognized as David Otunga, Skip Sheffield, and Justin Gabriel. Ted stopped the treadmill, hopping off. I noticed his features showed a hint of hostility, but it was barely perceptible.

"Barrett," he said crisply, nodding once in acknowledgment. I saw Wade's gaze flicker, and his eyes locked with mine. He studied me momentarily with an air of interest. "What can I help you with?" Ted asked, his voice anything but kind.

"Now, now, DiBiase. No need to be so brisk. It just so happened that I saw your little lady friend, and wanted to meet her." Wade's voice was full of fake sweetness, and although he had been watching Ted after gazing at me, his eyes kept flickering back to look at me. He turned his body towards me, smiling. "Wade Barrett. What is your name?" He stuck out his hand, and I forced myself to stick out my hand, shaking his gingerly and letting go fast.

"Istella." I felt my voice tremble, and heard the other three men laugh. They covered their mouths to make it less obvious.

"Istella, you seem familiar... oh, that's right, you're working on Randy Orton's bio! How is that coming along?" Wade's words unsettled me for some reason, and I decided to lie a little.

"It's not," I said without any tremor in my voice, flashing a face sad smile, "He hates me. He acts like I'm nonexistent or like I'm a nuisance... I guess I kind of am." I sighed wistfully, and I saw Wade's expression shift, becoming unreadable as his smile slowly faded.

"Is that so?" He murmured, more to himself than me. He looked down at me, a smile set on his face once again. "I heard what that brute Sheamus did to you. Did he mention why he hurt you?"

I ran my hand through my hair. Ted inched closer to me. "Actually, Sheamus said that you hired him to hurt me." I didn't know whether this was a bad move on my part, but Wade's reaction surprised me.

"What?" Wade's face was one of shock. "Istella, I have nothing against you. I hired Sheamus to take care of someone, but I guess I wasn't clear in who it was. Forgive me?" He seemed so sincere that my terror faded someone.

"It's fine," I said, smiling at him. Maybe I had been imagining everything. Suddenly, I felt a presence behind me, and Wade and the other stiffened.

"You need to leave, Barrett." I heard Randy's cold, venom-filled voice, and could only imagine his expression. He spat out the words. I felt him move, and he maneuvered in front of me.

"Orton. Why the hostility? Were you planning to charm Ms. Shapiro? I'll back off." Wade sounded sincere, but I couldn't help the feeling of unrest from his words. Suddenly, a thought occurred to me. I had never mentioned my last name. I stayed quiet though, too unnerved to say anything.

"Who?" Eandy looked to Ted, then me, his expression indifferent. Now I knew Randy was playing stupid, but had no clue why. "Oh, she's writing my bio, I have no other interest with her. I'l telling you to leave so I can speak to DiBiase." Even though Randy see,ed to be putting on an act, his words stung.

"Very well. Gentlemen, let's leave. Oh Istella, would you like to accompany us?" Wade winked at me.

"No," Randy barked out, anger clear in his tone. "She stays, too. Now leave." Randy hissed the last word, and Wade smirked, undaunted. He winked at me before leaving. Randy turned to me and Ted. His icy gaze fell on me. "Stay away from Nexus, especially Wade." I didn't get it. Why did Randy sound so hostile? What was going on that was causing this anger?

"Wade said it was a misunderstanding, what happened with Sheamus. He apologized," I said feebly. I didn't see any change in Randy's expression from my words, and his cold gaze was unnerving me. I looked down at the ground, trying to think about what could have made Randy's mood change.

"Stay away from him, regardless," Randy said, his voice emotionless. "Come with me." He strode out of the gym, and I exchanged a confused look with Ted before getting up and following Randy.

I went outside of the gym, walking to where Randy was standing. He stared at the wall, and I didn't say anything as I stood in front of him.

"I made a mistake," he said slowly in a detached voice. "It's better if we pretend that we were never friends." I felt something twist inside of me, like someone had poured icewater right into my stomach.

"Why?" I hated how vulnerable I sounded. "What did I do?"

Randy laughed, the sound of it humorless. "Do you think that your friendship offers me anything? You are nothing but a liability." He enunciated the last word, leaning towards me as he spoke. I felt sick, tears pricking my eyes. What had happened to the kind Randy?

"But, I though..." my voice was a hoarse whisper.

"You thought wrong. You thought that I believed yo when you said you forgot about us having sex? You thought that I forgot? You were wrong." I gasped, not believing my ears. I felt like a dim roar was surrounding us, making everything seem like a buzz. "You aren't worth remembering, though. You were a horrible lay. Do both of us a favor and stay out of my way." He looked at me, his eyes two empty blue pools. I saw something else, too, something indecipherable.

"Randy, please," I said, my voice breaking, "Why can't we be friends?"

I let out a small yelp as he grabbed my shoulders and pushed me into the wall, hard. The pain of the force, coupled with the soreness from Sheamus' attack, caused spots to form in front of my eyes. They cleared as Randy brought his face to mine, his breathing ragged.

"Just stay away from me," he snarled, jerking me and causing shots of pain. "Understand?"

"You're hurting me," I whispered, feeling a traitor tear fall from my eyes. Randy's expression softened for the shortest of seconds, but it went cold again as he released me.

"Go back to DiBiase." He turned and walked fast. I didn't know why, but his words had given me more pain than his actions. I just stood there, feeling numb, until Ted appeared. He looked like he was going to say something, but he stopped, his face sympathetic.

"Come here, hon." Ted pulled my into a hug, and I returned it, doing my best not to cry. Ted shifted me so his arm was around me, and we made our way back to our room. As we got to the door, Ted said, "Someone is visiting me, maybe you could talk to them."

He opened the door and led me to the couch. It took me a minute to notice the pretty brunette who was curled up, watching tv. She glanced our way, a warm smile appearing as she saw Ted. Her expression switched to one of confusion as she saw me.

"Hey baby, this is Istella. Istella, I'd like you to meet my wife, Kristen." Ted motioned to her, and I pulled away from Ted. Kristen got up and stood in front of me, and surprisingly gave me a hug. She let go, smiling.

"It's nice to meet you. Ted has said a lot about you!" Kristen led me to the couch, and I sat down. She exchanged a quick hug and kiss with Ted and sat beside me.

"It's nice to meet you, too," I croaked, a lump in my throat. Randy's words played through my brain again and again.

"Well, I'm going back to the gym. Bye Stella, bye babe." Ted sent us a smile before leaving. Kristen turned to me, muting the tv.

"So Istella, how do you like being on the road with the boys?" Kristen sounded so genuinely nice that my automatic response was to smile at her.

"It's been rocky," I said, the lump in my throat slowly diminishing. "Did Ted ask you to come on the road?"

"Yeah, he told me about you over the phone, and thought that you would enjoy the girl company." Kristen spoke so happily when she talked about Ted... for some stupid reason it reminded me of Randy, and I felt tears in my eyes. "Oh dear, what's wrong?"

"Nothing." I sighed, not wanting to trouble Kristen. An apologetic look came over her, and she smiled, embarrassed.

"I heard you and Randy Orton were having trouble getting along... want to talk about it?" She sounded sympathetic, and I shook my head.

"It's fine." I thought about Randy's words again, and a tear slipped out. Kirtsen put her hand on mine, her expression kind.

"Istella, I don't know you, but you're my friend. I won't say a word to anyone, not even Ted, or our dog, Rigsby. You have to let it out." I felt something tighten inside of me, and I reacted.

Through tears, I told Kristen everything, including how Randy took my virginity when we had drnken sex. I told her our recent conversation, too. She listened without interruption, letting me finish before she spoke.

"Istella," Kristen sounded hesitant, "DId it ever occur to you that you may be concealing your feelings towards Randy?"

I felt myself weaken as Kristen said what I has been thinking of for the past while.

"I..." My voice faded, my body feeling cold and tense as I let myself think the unimaginable.

"I'm no mind reader," Kristen said, smiling slightly, "But I think you're hiding something from yourself. Think, Stella, think hard."

I started to conjure up all my thoughts, finally organizing them and piecing them together. Oh no. It could not be. No. But then the big question popped into my head.

When Randy had hurt his hand in the bedroom, why did I feel the same pain he did if I had no feelings for him?

I had no answer.

Kristen hugged me, and tears started streaming down my face and onto her shoulder. I couldn't believe it. This was not what I had imagined happening. I thought of going to sleep in the safety of Randy's arms. The weird sensation of warm lips on mine. The soft, sorrowful, whispered words.

"Forgive me."

I cried harder as I accepted what fate had thrown at me. Kristen was silent, knowing that I had admitted the truth.

I was in love... I was in love with Randy Orton.

So this basically showed Istella's feelings , but the next few chapters are interesting , or at least I think so [x I promise an update tomorrow , upon my lifee ! And by tomorrow I mean July 27th , because I update after midnight [:

NEXT CHAPTER PREVIEW:

As I walked to my room, dejected, I skidded to a halt, my eyes widening. Randy had been leaning against his hotel door, but I hadn't noticed until he moved in front of me. He crossed his arms and his eyes roamed downwards. I blushed, remembering that I was clad only in my bikini.

"Excuse me," I mumbled...