Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, or anything related to him.

Note: This was written for Fire the Canon's "50 Days of Inspiration" competition using the prompt genre: parody and genre: humor.

Warnings: n/a

Rating: K+

Characters: Harry, Hermione, Ron, Voldemort

Word Count: 606

The brave, amazing and oh-so-wonderful Harry Potter stepped out from between the trees to face the evil, cowardly, pathetic Dark Lord.

"Ah, yes, Harry Potter. Come to die at my feet?" The man sneered.

"No, Harry! Don't do it. Don't let him kill you!" Hermione shrieked.

"Forget about him, Hermione, and come run off with me, and marry me, so we can have little bratty children!"

"Ronald Weasley, you are an in-sesa-tive prat!" Hermione yelled as she hit him in the shoulder and stomped away from the older boy.

The Dark Lord tried not to snicker at their antics. "Once more, Harry Potter, have you come to die?"

Harry stood firm. "I'm not scared of you, you big bully! You're ugly and you're smelly, and you don't have a face! Just you try and kill me!"

The bad Dark Lord waved his wand fancily over his head. "Abra Kadabra!" He pointed the wand at Harry, who missed the cue for a moment and stood there looking confused before realizing what was supposed to happen and randomly falling over. The Dark Lord leered. "Ha ha, I have won the war! Harry Potter is dead!"

"You're a big meanie!" Hermione yelled at him.

"Too bad, little girl! Now you will have to bow to me, and I shall make everyone miserable!" Voldemort cackled.

"Not so fast, Vuglymort! I didn't die!" Harry jumped up off the ground, waving his arms in the air to make sure that he was seen.

"Nooooo! How can this be?"

"Your spells cannot harm me! Now, I will defeat you, with the power of... How do I defeat you again?"

"The power of love," Voldemort patiently explained.

"Oh yeah! I will defeat you with the power of love!" Harry raised his own wand, paused and then lowered it. "How do I do that?" Hermione ran over and tugged on on his robes to get him to lean over so she could whisper in his ear. "Do I have to?" Harry whined at her suggestion. She nodded furiously. Harry sighed and walked over to Voldemort. Tugging on the Dark Lord's robes to get him to lean over, Harry waited patiently until Voldemort obeyed and then planted a kiss square on his lips.

Voldemort stared at his opponent blankly. Harry glared. "Are you dead yet? I don't want to have to do that again."

Voldemort continued to stare at the three young members of the Golden Trio. "Are you telling me that you think I killed Voldemort by kissing him?"

Albus 'Harry' Potter shrugged while Lily 'Hermione' Potter burst out into giggles, but James 'Ron' Potter just smirked. "Don't worry, Dad. We won't tell Mum."

Harry 'Voldemort' Potter frowned at his children. "I didn't defeat Voldemort by kissing him."

"You defeated him by love, Daddy. In the bedtime stories, the dark spells are always broken by love when the hero kisses the princess, so you must have kissed him," Lily explained as the children headed up toward the house.

"Couldn't I have kissed your mother instead to kill him? She could have been a princess." Harry argued.

Lily shook her head. "Nope, she didn't have any bad spells on her. It had've been him."

Harry was beginning to regret the fact that he didn't tell them he won by having a super powerful wand that he hid. It certainly would have helped this situation. "I didn't kiss Voldemort!" He yelled insistently after his children, just as Ginny had happened come to the door. She gave him a weird look and shut the door behind the youngsters. Harry flopped backwards on the grass and groaned.