Chapter 4

Warnings: Angsty (I guess), a little bit of fluff, and the start of the Roderich, Elizaveta, Gilbert love triangle.

Yao felt movement, like something was steadily going up and down. Kind of like a boat, just, gentler. He woke up around twenty minutes ago but he still hasn't opened his eyes, he was still trying to figure out what he was on and something in the back of his mind was telling him he wouldn't like it at all. But there were things he needed to get done, classes he had to go to, and he had to talk to Elizaveta about the date last night. Sighing he finally cracked open an eye, just enough to let a sliver of light to come through but that was all he needed in order to wake up his brain and gain control over simple motor skills. He opened his eyes more, now they were half lidded and he could make out a light peachy expanse of skin. Now ideas were starting to pop in his mind, some good like how it could be a cream colored water bed, and some bad like maybe I got drunk or something and accidently whored myself out. But his head wasn't pounding and the sunlight didn't hurt too bad so it couldn't be a hangover. Confused he flicked his eyes back down to the creamy skin, Yao moved his head a bit and felt something soft tickle his cheek. Straining his eyes down even more he saw chest hair, not a lot but it was definitely there. Something clicked in his head and he remembered Ivan shirtless the first day he came here.

Ivan,

Pale skin,

And a little hairy,

'Wait' Yao's eyes shot open and he scrambled up, only to fall onto the coffee table after trying to run away and a pain shot up his lower back. 'I just had sex with Ivan, He's a guy! I'm a guy! We've know each other for two days!' Suddenly images of last night played in his mind "Oh god, oh no, I had sex with Ivan." Yao wanted to cry, and scream, and just go live in a hole now. He had sex with a GUY who he only knew for TWO days. "Jao! What is wrong?" That voice, more scenes from last night flashed in his head, Yao's eyes snapped up to Ivan who had a worried look on his face. Ivan's thumb made contact with his cheek making him cringe, he felt hot, fat tears rolling down his cheeks, he didn't even know he was crying. "I-Ivan…i- I don't…I'm s-so sorry, I'm so, so sorry." His voice kept breaking, oh god, was it that good Ivan made him lose his voice? "For what my sunflower?" Yao could hear it, the tone of Ivan's voice was pleading for him not to say what he knew was inevitable, he was pleading for him to change his mind. "I-I have to go Ivan, i-I'm so sorry, so, so, so sorry. I just need to c-clear my head." Even his voice was trembling, Ivan made a distressed noise In the back of his throat and as Yao finally managed to get up and start to gather his clothes he felt big arms snatch around his waist. "J-Jao please, p-please don't go. I love you Jao." Putting his hands over Ivan's arms Yao pried them loose and started dressing. "N-no, I'm sorry Ivan, t-this was a mistake." Grabbing the keys off the counter Yao left, he was barely halfway down the hall when he heard multiple swear words in what he presumed to be Russian, sobbing, and furniture crashing against the walls.

The only sound in the off white room was the steady beeping from the heart monitor, running a hand through his hair Roderich sighed; he got a call from the hospital last night saying Elizaveta got shot on a drive by. Needless to say he was at the hospital in less than thirty minutes, he hardly slept at all, most of the time he was stressing out, thinking that she won't make it or asking Elizaveta in a soft voice to wake up, even if it meant getting hit by a frying pan that always seemed to travel in the girls back pack. Roderich felt horrible, he didn't know why but he couldn't help but blame himself. He's liked this girl ever since they first met but wasn't sure if it was true love or just a meaningless crush. Roderich looked down at his watch; it's been almost eighteen hours since he got the call from the hospital. Apparently Elizaveta was bobbing in and out of consciousness and told one of the doctors to call his number which was in her contacts before passing out for good. The unanswered question was why? He knew she like him, that's obviously why she asked him out, but to have them call him. His cell phone gave out a shrill cry, blasting The Flight of the Bumblebee at almost full volume. Looking at the front screen he saw it was Gilbert calling, unsure of whether it would be a good time to answer he hesitated then opted out for just stepping to the other side of the room to look out the window. "Hallo Gil-"

"Yo, Roddy, why the hell did you take so long? Hope I didn't interrupt your awesome piano playing even though you would've stopped for even awesomer me right!" Roderich sighed; maybe answering the phone wasn't such a good idea after all.

Pressing down on the gas harder Yao let loose a chocked sob, it wasn't the fact that he slept with Ivan that was making him cry like this. It was the look on Ivan's face, like he's experienced this before. His eyes were begging Yao to stay and his mouth was trying to form the right words. But there were no right words for that moment. It would have gone differently if they had been dating for maybe a month, but they just met. But since they just met, why did it hurt Yao so much? He could just act like nothing happened and even though there's pressure from Ivan probably wanting him to leave quickly he would be able to do a more in-depth search for an apartment. 'You have to apologize for running.' That part of his mind made Yao think about what he was scheming of just moments ago, but there was no possible way in coming up with a good explanation of why he ran away from the guy he just had sex with. Regardless if they hardly knew each other, Yao did like Ivan, to an extent. He didn't love Ivan, oh no, even though he's never had a relationship before he didn't want to know what it feels like to get your heart broken. This would probably be the only outcome to staying and getting to love Ivan. He just couldn't see any other ending, maybe this is his revenge for promising little Im Yong Soo he would watch his silly Korean soap operas with him. Now that he thought about it, yesterday and today seemed to be exactly like those soap operas, meet some nice looking guy, let them take you on a date, or In this case sex, wake up naked together, then haul ass out the house saying how you were sorry and it was a mistake and other stupid stuff like that. Yao did like Ivan, it wasn't a lot, but he would go back and try to make it better and to work things out.

'Crash!', 'Bang!' Two more plates, broken. Glass was strewn across the floor, mixing in with many other quirky decorations Ivan managed to get ahold of and destroy in his blind rage. No, it wasn't rage, he's felt rage before and it wasn't like this. Rage burned you, casted a mark on your heart that didn't wash away until you hit something or yelled at something enough. This certainly wasn't rage, it didn't matter how many times Ivan slammed his fist into the wall or heatedly berate the overturned couches, he could still hear Yao's words 'It was a mistake' He sneered at a plate his sister, Katyusha, gave him. This plate reminded him of Yao, so pretty and delicate and feminine, it just served to make him angrier. This wasn't the first time someone he loved left him, there was his Mother, his Father, and his two Sisters whom he loved more than anything in the world. Then there was Yao, he made a promise with himself the first time he met Yao to make him his. Well his plan wasn't going how he expected it to, he expected Yao to love him for this, was he really that bad at knowing the outcome of his actions. Maybe this was just a dream, or maybe God got the sudden urge to make someone's life suck more than it already did, but it always seems that whenever he tried to do something to make someone else happy it always turned around and bit him in the butt. "Y-Yiwan…what…i-I don't even…" Oh, speak of the devil, turning around Ivan put on a coy smile and tried to pull his scarf higher over his mouth but found he didn't have it. 'So I even let him see me without my scarf hmm?' That question scared him, what if Yao asked. Wait, that's right, he didn't like or well, shouldn't like Yao so he could just push him away. Or try to in any case "What is it Jao? Something wrong?" He was proud of the venom lacing the words, it was deliciously poisonous. "Yiwan, y-your back…what happened to your back?" Well, that wasn't entirely what he expected. Then Ivan remembered almost all of his scars were on his back and shoulders, "Tell me why you came back Jao." What is this feeling, just that little question made his heart twist a little bit. It wasn't a metaphorical twist were someone or something became darker or more morbid. It was more like a pang, a dagger, embraced with ice making little cuts on his heart with each one going deeper and deeper. No, he's certainly never felt this before " I-I wanted to say I'm sorry for running…now please…tell me what's on your back." Ivan stiffened, he hadn't expected Yao to apologize he was preparing himself for ridicule over his scars, " You're sorry…" There it was again, the icy cut to his heart made itself know once more. "Y-yes I am now tell me what's on your back." He growled, he couldn't believe Yao asked, no more like demanded to know about Ivan's scars, "Little Jao, you can't expect me to tell you know hmm? Especially after what just happened, about how I was a mistake." Chuckling Ivan tried to control himself, his 'other side' was coming out and he didn't want Yao to have to face it. He took one step forward and Yao took one back, " Y-Yiwan I want to help you, you're not a mistake, I was just flustered." Ivan took another step closer 'Not a mistake' Those words echoed around the 'other Ivan's' head while Yao took another step back. He felt it again, the twist in his heart, if felt like someone wringing out a dirty wet rag.

"Y-Yiwan, s-stop, you're scaring me." Another twist,

One step forward " Jao, you're right, I am a mistake."

One step back, "N-no Yiwan, you're not."

Another twist "That does not matter now, because you made a mistake my little Jao."

One step forward and another back " W-what's that?"

One more twist, stronger than the others as the 'real' Ivan tried to stop "You came back."

Stepping forward once more Ivan was merely inches away from Yao, he could feel the heat radiate off his frightened body, he could see the trembling in Yao's proud fingers as he tried to shield himself. Amber eyes were clouded with fear, amber eyes, big expressive amber eyes. Those eyes made something snap in Ivan and everything became cold, he felt weak and he knew he was shaking. The world became a blur and he dropped to his knees, the 'other Ivan' left and the real one came back. He threw his arms around Yao's middle and yanked him down so they were eye level, "Jao, Jao, Jao, Jao…" Kissing every part of Yao's face Ivan couldn't help but whisper that name like a mantra, kissing his cheeks, his forehead, his chin, his nose, then finally stopping at Yao's eyes. Those warm amber eyes that saved him, brought him back from a strange dark world when nothing else ever could. Ivan kissed his eyes, delicately placing his lips on the lash line. His bottom lip was tickled and lightly poked by the long black lashes there, "Yiwan, stop."

Even though Yao tried to sound annoyed he couldn't, all he could feel now was a sweet wave of relief. He was so scared, his back was to the wall and he's never seen anyone act like that, Yao was still scared to, he's never seen a change from angry to relief like that in someone else either. "You brought me back Jao, t-thank you." Yao scrunched up his face in thought 'Brought him back? From what.' Sighing and bringing a hand to run through Ivan's thin hair he couldn't help but smile. "Yiwan, I want to try this out…" Looking down at the back of Ivan's head was so much easier when he was saying this and he was actually glad the blonde decided that Yao's shoulder was a good pillow for the moment. "Try what out Jao?" His words were muffled from the skin but somehow Yao could still hear him and understand the message within these words. Ivan knew what he was talking about but he wanted Yao to say it, saying something was more commitment than just thinking something. "I want to try a relationship…w-with you I mean…aru." The Asian man groaned in frustration, he hated that stupid habit of saying 'aru' whenever he was nervous. "Da, I do to, Jao can I tell you something?" It amazed Yao to see how childlike Ivan could be, especially after that episode. "Sure, w-what is it aru?" He felt a rumble on his chest and looked down to see Ivan giggling, which was strange because of how large and…naked, he was. "You have a small pen-" Pushing Ivan off of him Yao set to cleaning the house up. "Aiyah, D-don't even finish, and it's not my fault you're a fucking horse Ivan, now help me clean." Setting the couch right side up Ivan couldn't help but to giggle more "Da, da, whatever you want Serdechko moyo, whatever you want.

~Dear lord, that was long and probably horrible. And sorry I didn't update that fast, skyrim and tumblr kinda got in the way lol. Please review it makes me feel loved and thanks to everyone that has reviewed. Serdechko moyo = My sweetheart (if its bad kill google translate not me) So theres gonna be a plot soon I guess and more tragedy, why? Cause I just might be a masochist (just kidding) no but really some sad stuffs gonna come up soon, sorry guys ;_;