When 'Team' Means A Safe Space
by JalendaviLady
Characters: Phil Coulson, Natasha Romanoff, Clint Barton, Tony Stark, Steve Rogers, Bruce Banner, Jarvis, Pepper Potts, Nick Fury
Summary: Natasha gets reassigned while recovering from a mission and the reason why shocks the rest of the Avengers. And that's only the start. Sequel to "Returning The Favor".
WARNINGS: Rape/Non-con References, Childhood Sexual Abuse References, Rape Aftermath, Underage Prostitution References
Chapter 3
It wasn't until two weeks later, once they'd gotten Steve through enough of The Waltons that substituting something else for movie night seemed reasonable, that anyone but Natasha had the first clue what was up with Steve.
They had decided to follow Phil's suggestion of watching Scorsese's early films set in New York to give Steve an idea of how the city and perceptions of it had changed over the decades, but JARVIS balked.
'Balk' in this case meaning that a number of movies Tony swore he had were not in the listing at all.
"JARVIS, I can understand putting a warning on Taxi Driver for Natasha's sake, but did you have to remove it from the database? And what was so wrong with Who's That Knocking, apart from one scene?"
"I'm sorry sir. I've been asked to restrict films with some of their content and the Avenger making the request asked me to be discreet about it if at all possible."
"Was not me," Bruce told him. "I've seen worse in person without transforming."
"It wasn't me, either," Phil concurred. "Even if I'd need to step out of the room for part of Knocking."
"For the record, I actually like Taxi Driver."
Everyone stared at Natasha.
"He takes care of her and she gets away. Why would I have issues seeing my old revenge fantasies in Technicolor?" She got up and headed toward the popcorn. "And I know when to duck my head and cover my ears in Knocking. Might even join Phil outside."
Clint filled a bag for her. "I don't think I'll ever want to watch that scene again, but everyone knows why so why would I ask for discretion?"
"Well, I wouldn't have said anything if I'd been the one to ask JARVIS to do it." Tony counted off on his fingers, and then the blood drained from his face. "Pepper?"
"Not I," she told him. "Believe me, if anyone ever hurt me like that, I'd warn you to behave around me."
"I am willing to be a knight in shining armor whenever needed..."
She smiled at him. "More like a knight in dented armor."
"More like highly dented armor," Natasha joked.
"Damn chitauri," Tony grumbled. "But who does that leave?"
Just then, Steve stepped out of the elevator carrying the evening's supply of pizza.
Phil's mind tried desperately not to process what was now absolutely apparent.
Bruce was his normal calm self.
A muscle in Tony's face started twitching. "My God," he whispered.
Steve stopped walking. "What just happened?"
Natasha met his gaze. "JARVIS. Content restrictions."
Steve said a few words Phil hadn't actually been sure he even knew.
Pepper gasped.
Steve set the boxes down on the bar.
"Steve?" Clint asked.
He closed his eyes, leaning on the bar and to Phil it looked like breathing and staying upright with support was just about as much as he could manage at the moment. Which, given that he was Captain Freaking America, said a lot more than it would for anyone else in the room.
"Whatever it is, you've got us now," Bruce told him.
Horrible things played through Phil's mind.
Widowed mother and later orphaned, physically weak, limited self-defense knowledge at that time, few close friends... Textbook ready-made victim for adults or peers.
How the hell did I miss that, I've only been reading about him since I was old enough to read my cousin's old comic books!
"Yeah, man. You've got us." It was as rattled as Phil had ever heard Tony Stark.
"I spent my teenage years getting beaten up in alleys by other kids. Bucky protected me when he could, but no friend can be there all the time. A few times..." Steve paused for a moment. "A few times, things went further."
"Sorry about nudging you with my bow," Clint apologized into the silence that followed.
Steve nodded, still not opening his eyes.
Pepper looked up at the ceiling. "JARVIS, do any of us have any projected issues with Adam West's Batman?"
"No one present has any predicted problems with that film, Ms. Potts."
"Pepper?" Tony asked.
Natasha walked over to Steve, wrapped an arm around his shoulders as well as someone her height could manage, and steered him toward the couch. "If we can still manage to watch a movie tonight, we'll need something light and distracting."
"So bring on the shark-repellent batspray," Bruce added.
Steve finally seemed to come back to himself. "What..."
Natasha tightened her grip on his shoulders for a moment. "They're trying to pick something to watch that won't be serious or jarring for you. If any of us end up feeling like watching anything tonight."
"I suppose there's no need for us to get involved at this point," Bruce said nonchalantly.
It took a moment for Phil to process that his air of complete indifference probably meant the exact and complete opposite: Bruce was trying his damnedest to keep the Hulk from entering the situation.
"They would be in their 90s by now, if they're still alive at all. Senile, probably can't remember a thing..." He took a deep breath. "The few other people who ever knew also knew better than to write something like that down."
"So it's just us who know," Clint reasoned with him. "And we're a team now, and you're our Captain."
"You know I won't look down on you for it," Natasha told him.
Bruce put a few slices of pizza on a plate and brought it over to him. "Eat. Trust me, a full stomach helps a multitude of hurts."
Steve nodded and took it. "... Tony?"
He walked over. "Some things my father said make a lot more sense now, Steve. I think he was afraid that I wouldn't tell if anything ever happened to me, so he did a lot of talking when I was little about letting him know if anyone hurt me no matter who. He was a hands-off parent otherwise, but he made sure I knew that."
"Howard knew," Steve confirmed. "He had to. There are some things that just can't be hidden by a human experimentation subject."
"I know that story," Pepper told him.
Steve sat for a while with the plate of pizza sitting on his lap. "... Phil?"
He grabbed one of the coke glasses off the bar and carried it over. They had taken to using the old-style glassware for sodas so everyone would know at a glance what had alcohol in it and what definitely did not, given the number of Avengers and friends who could not, would not, or should not drink alcohol and the fact it was practically ubiquitous at Tony Stark's personal bar. Phil hoped the feel of the glass would be something familiar now. "Here." He pressed it into Steve's hand.
He looked away from Phil so completely that Phil couldn't see any of his face besides the tips of his ears. "Sorry your childhood hero wasn't who you thought he was."
"Stop that," Phil snapped. "That was their doing, not yours. If you're at fault for what happened to you, then Tasha's at fault for what happened to her. And she isn't. It just means that the golden age of morality people keep talking about wasn't. Things just got hidden better, and when things are hidden no one does anything about them."
"This from a SHIELD agent with how many security clearances?" Tony quipped.
"Classification isn't the same thing as hiding. At least not when it's done for the reasons it's meant to be."
And then Phil caught Natasha's knowing look and the way no one else who could see Steve's face was moving to correct him and wondered...
Wait. That kind of thinking about himself would have made the serum procedure fail. Erskine wouldn't have tried.
"That wasn't about how you feel about yourself, was it? That was what you thought I might feel about you."
Steve turned his head back and nodded.
He had never looked so young to Phil before and in that moment it finally hit him.
In terms of days actively lived, Steve was one of the two youngest people in the room, Natasha being the other. Pepper and Bruce were the next oldest, followed by Clint and finally by Tony and Phil himself.
"We're all on your side now," Clint told him. "No matter what some other people would say even now."
"I was serious about the food. A good meal and friends nearby are the universal human coping strategy."
"That and alcohol," Tony chimed in.
Steve finished chewing his first bite of pizza. "I can't get drunk."
"What?" The word was a mix of real and theatrically overblown horror. Tony rushed over and felt Steve's forehead with the back of his hand. "How awful. Do we need to get you a doctor?"
Pepper rolled her eyes.
Steve smiled, just a bit but it was genuine. "It was a side-effect. My metabolism gets rid of it too quickly for anything but a mild buzz." He actually managed a little laugh. "Believe me, your father and I tried to get me drunk. I can't believe he wouldn't have told you that story - we only cleared out the entire stock of two local bars and the Officer's Club."
Clint's eyebrows shot up. "Really?"
"Later," Steve promised around another mouthful of pizza.
"If I may make a suggestion regarding the evening's viewing selection?"
"What is it, JARVIS?" Tony asked.
"It seems to me that tonight would be a good time to ignore the education of Mr. Rogers in favor of revisiting the familiar."
"Sounds good to me," Bruce volunteered.
"Steve's been the one doing all the adjusting," Natasha commented. "Maybe it's our turn to find out where he's starting from."
"All in favor?" Cheering. "All opposed?" Silence. "Steve, you okay with us going ahead?"
"JARVIS can stop it if I find out I'm not."
"Right."
The lights dimmed by about two-thirds, enough that they could still see to get food and drink whenever they wanted.
Phil sat down beside Steve. Natasha let go of him and rubbed her arm.
The film came on and the American-born Avengers started laughing.
Natasha joined them the second the title came up.
"We represent the lollypop..."
A bag of popcorn flew through the air and hit Tony on the head.
"Okay!" He ducked his head slightly and held his arms up in a defensive position. "I'll wait until the songs actually come on."
"Good!" came the chorus.
And that was when Bruce called Tony 'Tin Man' with Pepper quickly giving reassurances that yes, she was absolutely sure that Tony really did have a heart, no matter what the tabloids said.
Thus started an hour and a half of audience participatory viewing that even Steve could participate in. And if anything needed explaining, it was usually Steve doing the explaining for once.