Chapter 13: Eat to Win

The next morning, the campers came into the mess hall to see that Chef wasn't cooking. "What? No breakfast?" Chris walked up to Trent. "Oh, don't worry bro, there will be plenty of food later on." He and Chef started snickering. "What are you two so giggly about?", Leshawna asked. They just laughed harder in response. "Congratulations to the remaining ten campers for reaching the halfway mark in the competition", Chris said. "The two teams will become one next week, but first, all the girls will be moved to the Gopher cabin and all the guys will stay in the Bass cabin. This week's challenge is as old as history itself: a battle of the sexes. After everyone is settled in, I'll announce the challenge. And then you'll have a, um, bite to eat." Chris and Chef laughed again. "Ready for a little good news? This week, no one will be kicked off." Everyone cheered. "It's just a reward challenge today, and it's a good one. Okay, time to relocate. Let's move!"

The campers went to the cabins, and Katie and Sadie were hugging and giggling the whole. Way. "This is so great", Sadie said, "we're finally together again!" "I know!", her BFF replied. "And we're going to the final four together!" Sadie gasped. "You really think so?" "I know so. Heather promised." Meanwhile, Lindsay hugged Cody. "Aww, I wish we could still share the Gopher cabin! Oh well..." She gave him a kiss on the cheek. "Good luck in the challenge today!" Cody blushed and waved as she ran off. "Yeah, you too..."

Gwen ran into Trent on his way to the Bass cabin. "It was really cool working with you", Trent said. "You know, together as a team." Gwen smiled and looked away. "Yeah, I'm glad we got to know each other, on a deep level and all..." "Yeah, me too. Well... I gotta get going. See ya!" Trent waved goodbye and Gwen waved back, then sighed.

Katie and Sadie got to the girls' cabin and walked in on an argument. "Nobody's leavin' until I find out who ate my pudding pockets!", Leshawna yelled. "I ate them. So what?", Heather asked. "Whoa, pump the breaks a minute! You're 'so what'-ing ME? That's my food! No one touches my food!" Heather rolled her eyes. "Whatever, deal with it. It serves you right for leaving your junk everywhere! Especially that." She pointed to Leshawna's bra, which was hanging on one of the bunks. "That is bugging me." Leshawna glared at Heather. "Yeah, it'd bug me too if I didn't have anything in the front or the back to shake!" Heather glared back. "Yeah, well you got so much junk in your trunk, your jeans should come with a trash compactor!" "Oh, you want a piece of this!" Heather turned and saw Katie and Sadie in the doorway. "Oh, hi girls! It's so good to see you! Welcome to our cabin, Sadie."

Confession Cam: Katie
"Wow, Heather's getting better at the whole being nice thing. She can go from meanie to sweetie in like two seconds."

Sadie smiled and Heather hugged her. "We're like a big family in here." "Big, and dysfunctional", Gwen grumbled. "Anything you need, just ask." "Thanks for the awesome welcome", Sadie said. Lindsay walked up to her. "Welcome to the club! This'll be so much fun, as long as you do everything Heather says." Heather glared at her and she backed away. "So, anyway, I made sure your bunk was next to Katie..." "Hey, that's my bed!", Lindsay said. Heather kicked her and she backed away. "So, you guys can make up for lost time." "Yay, thank you!" Katie smiled. "This is great! I bet we're getting along way better than the guys."

No, they were not. Over in the guys' cabin, DJ was scratching some records while Trent played guitar, with Geoff and Cody drinking sodas. Cody belched. "Uh, 'scuse me." Geoff finished his glass, and after a second he unleashed a huge burp. The others were stunned. "Nice one", Trent said. "That guy deserves to be captain." Cody patted him on the back. "Way to go, dude." "I owe it all to my big bro back home", Geoff said, "for showing me how to pull back and let 'er rip!" He burped again. "Those chicks are going down!" The other guys cheered.

Back in the girls' cabin, Leshawna walked over to Sadie and Katie. "Watch out for Heather, you hear me? She's trouble." "Mind your own business", Heather yelled. "We're a team, and we gotta live in the same cabin, so this is all of our business!" They glared at each other, then Heather got some tape and divided the room down the middle. She stood on one side. "This is our side of the cabin, and that's your side. Choose wisely, Sadie." Sadie shrugged. "No choice at all, I'm sticking with Katie." She stepped over the line and hugged her friend. Heather smiled at Gwen and Leshawna. "Think of it this way: I'm doing you both a favor. You each get more space over there. Have fun!" Gwen rolled her eyes and Leshawna glared over the line at Heather. "You cross this line and I will smack you down." Gwen sighed. "Let's try to get along, okay? Otherwise the guys are gonna kill us."

Confession Cam: Sadie
"Wow, Heather's even nice to people who hate her! I didn't expect that..."

Confession Cam: Heather
"Okay, I probably could've played that better. But Leshawna seriously creases me."

At lunchtime, the campers went to the mess hall and found Chris and Chef waiting for them. "It's time for today's challenge", he said while checking off something on his clip board. "Where's lunch at?", Leshawna asked. Chris and Chef laughed. Heather glared at him. "Stop doing that!" "Let's just tell them. Today's challenge is... the brunch of disgustigness! You'll be getting a nine course meal. Each member of each team must finish each dish. You will not know if the next dish is grosser than the last, not as gross, or just as gross. Just that it will likely be... gross." Chef smiled. "Tell them what they'll get if they win, Chris!" "The winning team spends two days at a local five star resort where they'll be pampered, eat gourmet food and get antibiotics against anything they may have caught while participating in this challenge. The losing team will go hungry tonight, and spend the next two days here on the island... with Chef." Chef waved and smiled scarily at the campers. "We are going to win this challenge!", Heather said.

The campers sat down for the first course and Leshawna cleared her throat. "Take a whiff, boys, cause all I smell is victory for me and my girls." Geoff laughed. "I'll eat anything, even my drawers if I have to. ...Will I have to?" "Let's begin the challenge. First, the appetizer." Chef took the lids off the plates and Cody sighed. "Whew, just meatballs. No problem!" He began eating. "Technically you're right, Cody. But these are kinda special. It's beef testicles." Cody stopped chewing. "Testicles?" His face turned green and he spat onto DJ's face. Geoff picked up a 'meatball' nervously. "I don't know if I can do this to my bovine brother. Chris nodded. "It's the hardest thing a man can do.

Confession Cam: Heather
"Judging by how the guys were reacting to the, um, dish, I knew I could psych them out and win this."

Heather and the other girls started eating. "What's the matter?", Heather asked, "You big boys can't eat a little meatball?" "Come on, guys", Geoff yelled, "our manhood is at stake!" Trent covered his eyes. "I can't do it!" "Well, looks like the guys lost this round", Chris said. "The first point goes to the female campers." The girls cheered. "And now, the next course in the brunch of disgustingness!" Chef pushed a cart with a covered tray on it into the mess hall. "You guys like pizza?" Everyone nodded. "I could eat pizza anytime, with anything on it", Trent said. Chris smirked. "Anything? How about live grasshopper pizza with tangy jellyfish sauce and live anchovies?" Lindsay groaned. "Eww, I hate anchovies!" Chef handed out slices. Leshawna poked hers, then turned away. "Nuh-uh, that is straight up nasty. I ain't eatin' that." "Oh yes you are", Heather said. "I am not missing out on an indoor, heated pool just because you can't keep down a few-" Heather looked at her hand and shrieked. "Grasshoppers! Okay, I can't do this." She stood up, and Gwen grabbed her arm. "I am digesting a bull's precious cajones. You're gonna eat." Heather yanked her hand away. "Fine. Can I get a little Parmesan on this?" Chef shook his head. Heather picked up her pizza, closed her eyes and ate a bite. "Ummm... delicious! You're up next, Leshawna." At the other table, Cody finished his slice. "Oh, I think I'm gonna be sick..." Trent looked at his slice and groaned. "I've got a weak stomach... Uh, be right back." He ran outside and barfed on a tree, then walked back.

Confession Cam: Trent
"When I was a kid, my parents used to hold me down and force feed me broccoli. They only did it because broccoli's good for ya."

"I can do this", Trent told the guys. "DJ, I need you to hold me down, while Geoff, you stuff the slice in my mouth. And no matter how much I scream, or beg, you have got to feed me that slice." Geoff shrugged. "Sure, I'm in." DJ grabbed Trent in a backwards bear hug, and Trent started kicking. "No, stop! Wait, it was a joke! I was kidding! I'm warning you, my dad's a lawyer!" Geoff shoved the pizza into Trent's mouth, and he ate it, then looked at DJ. "Mama?" Then, Geoff and DJ had their pizza while Leshawna only took one bite of hers. "Aww, you know what, I can't be doin' this. Little grasshopper minding his own business, what'd I wanna go and bite his little head off for?" "The winners of this round are the guys!", Chris declared.

"Alright, who's ready for the third course? Spaghetti! Well. Actually it's worms covered in snail slime sauce and hairballs." Geoff stood up. "No! I can't take it anymore!" He ran out the door screaming, and DJ chased after him. He tackled Geoff. "Okay, okay, I'm good! I'm good!" He went back to the table, and put on a blindfold and put a clothes pin on his nose. "I love spaghetti. Spaghetti

is good. Okay..." The other guys followed suit, and they forced the worms down. "Once again, the winners are the guys", Chris said. They cheered. Leshawna glared at them. "Come on, let's show them some girl power!" Gwen smiled. "You're right. Let's kick some boy butt." "Yeah", Heather said, "just like I've been saying all along. We gotta act like a team."

"Alright everybody, time for course number four." Chef put the trays on the tables. "No nine course meal would be complete without soup. Today's special is French bunion soup with hangnail crackers." Geoff looked at it. "I think they just used stuff from Chef's bathroom floor." At the girls' table, Heather got a funnel for them to drink the soup with. She stuck it in Lindsay's mouth and poured the soup in. "I didn't even taste it!", she said. The other girls did the same for theirs. "The girls win again", Chris said. "The score is now tied up at two. Only five more courses left." Chris bowed. "Bon apetit." The next four courses were chewed gumballs, a skunk shake, a flip-flop with glue on it, and garbage soup. The girls won the first two, the guys won the others.

"Wow. It's still tied up! We're down to the last course in the challenge", Chris said. "It's delicious dolphin weiners! Hot dogs, made of dolphin." Katie and Sadie gasped. "Oh my god, NO!" "Dolphins are our friends!" Heather picked up a bottle of ketchup. "What are you waiting for? It's already dead. If you don't eat it, we don't win." DJ stood up. "I'm with them. I'm not eating no dolphin." Chef sighed. "I slave over a hot stove all day, and what do I get? No appreciation!" DJ, Sadie and Katie refused to eat. Chris glared at them. "Okay, enough! We'll solve this by having an eat-off."

Chris motioned for Leshawna and Geoff to come over to a table, where Chef was pouring drinks into shot glasses. "Whoever can drink the most shot glasses of fresh, delicious blended cockroach will be the winner. This unlikely, satisfying blend of eight different kinds of cockroach is vitamin rich for your balanced lifestyle. On your mark... get set... go!" Geoff drank seven of them. Leshawna drank eight. "Leshawna wins!" The girls cheered, but Leshawna just sat there and groaned. "Ohhh... somethin's coming up..." She started vomiting, which caused a chain reaction of barfing around the room.

The girls went to the dock to catch the boat. "Way to go, guys", Heather said. Leshawna smiled. "Yeah... I guess it was worth it." Katie hugged Heather. "I'm so glad we're going to a resort! Now I can give you a makeover!" Heather went wide-eyed. "Wait, what?" Katie and Sadie pushed her onto the boat, and they sailed off with the others into the sunset.