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I know nothing.
I know everything.
My world is an ocean, everything is shifting, rising and falling, ever changing, nothing is known, yet I feel everything.
I am blind, deaf, mute and dumb yet I am not. I feel nothing yet it is not so, I feel. The wind on the face of young Chinese girl as she looks out the window and dreams of a world beyond what she can see. The light shining on the face of the boy as he lays bleeding in a ghetto as he regrets not being able to change anything.
Yet I do more than feel, I hear.
Screams of battle as men shoot and knightmares race thorough battle lines spreading death and destruction. Vows taken, vows broken, promises keep and promises not.
I smell the soot of smoke, the stench of filth, the fragrance of opulence. Yet it is a mess and I know not for sure what I smell.
I see lovers eyes as they are torn apart forever. Grim determination is the eyes of those who seek vengeance. I see a man defying the world and my heart races at the thrill of it.
I feel a hand in mine, it clasps it tightly silently begging me to never let go. My hand grips my sword as I rush my enemy. The prick of rose thorn stings my hand as I hand my beloved a bouquet of roses. I feel the ring on my finger given by the man I once hated and now loved.
Yet I do more than experience I know.
I am sitting in quiet contemplation, I carry a heavy burden but I have laid a lofty goal and I shall see it thorough.
I am standing before a crowd, I speak as they roar with approval, I have cast out my destiny and I will forge my own world with it
Yet it all grows ever fainter and more distant and I feel the pull of my own thoughts and my own will.
The world is an ocean of consciousness and mingling and interacting. Some call this god, how shallow those who say that are. From where I sit floating here, drawing my own thoughts together I form a raft and I look and perhaps I am the first to get a glimpse of God. If the world is the ocean, he is the sky, a mind beyond this sea of minds, here lost in the sea I feel the weight of his will upon me, threatening to destroy my very being. I try to gather my self and force myself to rise above the sea of the worlds thought, but as if responding to my attempts the sea itself surges against me along with the force from above. The force is too much and I sink beneath the waves, descending into the black depths of the sea of thoughts. I reach and try to reach for the sun, but like Icarus of old my wings have melted and I have no future now but to sink and disappear.
Darkness
Blackness
Silence
Sleep
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Diary of Gergory Muller PHd
Subject 4479 has finally stabilized but he has yet to awaken. His body however is healing at an impressive rate with the unknown side affect that all pigmentation in his skin and hair is vanishing. I am unsure if this means that his body has excepted the code or not. Unfortunately I do not have enough data to properly expound on this. His apparent survival is the only good thing I can note of these days. Something has happened with the Princes attack of the Elevens ghetto in the Shinjuku district and with that everything has been thrown into complete turmoil. We're in the process of relocating our lab, to a more remote area in the mountains away from the chaos of the Tokyo, and chaos it is. I can not trust the reports I'm getting at the moment. I hope in a day or so to have a better idea what is going on.