Chapter Eight

"Oh look, Teddy, I found your wife," Albus said cheerfully, jerking his thumb over his shoulder, quite enjoying the look of fear and panic spreading across his older brother's face as he took in Victoire's murderous expression.

"Hey, Vic," James said uneasily. "What's up?"

"What's up?" Victoire repeated with deadly calm. "Did you honestly just ask me 'what's up'?"

"Er…yes?" James offered

"You destroyed the top floor of my job and you want to know what's up?" By this point, no one could miss the unmistakable anger rolling off of Victoire in waves. Indeed, if she got any angrier, it was entirely possible that she might start throwing fireballs, never mind the fact that she wasn't even a full Veela.

James did not reply immediately. Rather, he was distracted momentarily as he caught sight of his mum waving to him cheerfully from the other side of the room. So this was why she had appeared to have a change of heart when yelling at him earlier. She had anticipated Victoire's reaction…No matter though. He would always be a Gryffindor, and Gryffindor's never backed down. Unless Victoire really was capable of throwing fire.

"Like I told mum earlier," James said, "I feel like 'destroyed' is far too strong of a word to use here. I was simply enabling them to redecorate."

If anyone had asked any of the cousins their opinion at that moment, they would have gladly shared their analysis that James' tone was entirely too offhand. He was only making Victoire angrier.

"I work here, James!" Victoire exploded. "You might think you'll be fine because you don't have to come back here tomorrow, but I do!"

By this time, Victoire had made her way across the room and was standing right in front of where James was seated. Luckily for James, this also put her within range of Teddy, who took swift advantage of their close proximity to grab his wife's hand, just as it was inching towards where she kept her wand.

"Vic, love," Teddy began, tugging on her hand so that she turned to face him, her expression softening just the slightest bit as their gazes locked, "It was kind of an accident."

"But he destroyed one-fifth of my job," Victoire protested.

"And Rose will probably be upset if you were sent to Azkaban the day her baby was born for killing your cousin," Teddy continued as if she hadn't spoken.

"I guess today is supposed to be about Rose," Victoire said with a sigh.

"Plus," Teddy continued again, "That's not even taking into consideration that I'd have to explain to Dora and John why their mum isn't going to be coming home anytime soon."

"And can you imagine how the pair of them would turn out with just you raising them?" Victoire agreed.

"Exac—hey!" Teddy cut himself off as he realized what his wife had just said.

"Can I at least kill him some other time, when there aren't any witnesses?" Victoire pressed at his distraction.

"Yes, dear," Teddy said with a defeated sigh, knowing a losing battle when he saw one.

"You tell her, Teddy," Louis said, smirking.

Victoire glared at her brother as she took the empty seat beside her husband, before turning her gaze back to James, who flinched visibly.

"Watch your back, Potter," She told him curtly, then turned to Lucy with a smile and said cheerfully, "So, how much have I missed?"

"Well," Molly began, cutting her sister off, "Most recently, Lucy, here, was trying to convince Teddy to name your next child Vela."

"And we've all decided that Scorpius and Rosie should have eighty-eight kids—maybe eighty-seven, depending on the name of your next kid," Fred stated.

"Oh, and that Gryffindor-ish names are preferable to any with Slytherin connotations," Roxanne joined in before Victoire could react, "Which is kind of a given, anyway, so you might have known that already."

And that if this baby didn't put in an appearance sometime in the immediate future, Ron might have to resort to something drastic; these bloody constellation names were driving him absolutely mental. It was quite possible that his nieces and nephews were unaware of this, however, as none of them chose to mention it.

"We only have three names left, actually," Lucy said quickly before anyone else could chime in with what she was sure would be another positively delightful tidbit of wisdom. "So why don't we just keep going with that? The next name is Virgo."

"It would be a zodiac," Hugo said exasperatedly.

"You also missed that," Lily informed Victoire. "We've been having a bit of a disagreement about whether zodiac names really should be included, but Lucy keeps continuing reading off names before we can have an epic battle over if they should."

"And after Virgo comes Volans," Lucy said right on cue before anything more could be said on the subject of zodiacs.

"Exhibit A," Louis said with a flourish of his hand towards Lucy.

"What does that one mean, Lu?" Albus asked, while Victoire merely shook her head at her cousins' and siblings' antics.

"Flying fish," Lucy answered promptly.

"Hmm…that's not a very good name for Hogwarts, is it?" Dominique asked thoughtfully. "Even if fish could fly, they'd still be an easy meal for any of the mascots of any of the four houses."

"Maybe if Rosie and Scorp sent the kid to Durmstrang?" James offered, contributing to the conversation for the first time since Victoire had returned. "They probably like to fish there…"

Ron was quite sure that he might have to join Victoire in causing James bodily harm after the young man had the nerve to suggest that any grandchild of his would attend the same school that Viktor bloody Krum had once gone to.

"Yes, and after they catch the fish," Lily stated, "They eat them."

"Alright, so maybe not…" James agreed.

"Personally," Dominique said, "I think you're all kind of missing the point on this one. The name just means flying fish. Naming the kid 'Volans' won't make it actually turn into a fish."

"Maybe it means the kid will be good at flying," Molly chimed in. "We can always use more Quidditch players in this family."

"All the same," Teddy said, "It's best to just keep going, don't you think? After all, this is the last one, isn't it, Lucy?"

"A sad, sad occasion," James intoned, wiping a fake tear from his cheek as Lucy nodded affirmatively. "What I wouldn't give for eighty-eight hundred constellations."

"Eighty-eight thousand," Fred challenged.

"Eighty-eight million," Louis joined in.

"No need to go overboard, mate," Fred told him. Ron couldn't help but agree with that statement; although, personally, at this point he would prefer if there weren't any constellations to begin with. But then again, once Lucy got the last name out of the way, hopefully his agony would come to a swift end. Unless his Rosie did decide to give his poor grandchild a horrid constellation name…

"Lucy?" Victoire prompted her younger cousin.

"Vulpecula," Lucy replied, "And before anyone asks, it means 'fox.'"

"Huh, those people who named the constellations really did save the best name for last," Fred said thoughtfully. "They did name them in alphabetical order, right?"

His cousins and sister chose not to dignify that question with a response.

"I think it's a positively lovely name," Molly said enthusiastically.

"They're sure to pick it," Dominique agreed easily. "It's perfect."

"And foxes are related to lions," Roxanne chimed in, "So it's a lovely Gryffindor name."

"You know, after all of the names we discussed today," Albus said thoughtfully, "I guess I can finally appreciate how hard it is to pick out a name for a baby."

"And as we can see with you," Lily informed her brother, "After all of the effort parents put into picking a name, they can still mess up horribly."

"My name has character," Albus informed his younger sister, repeating the exact same thing their father had often said while they were growing up.

"Your name has letters in it that should never have been arranged the way they are!" Lily shot back.

"Well…" Albus trailed off, at a loss as to how to further continue the argument he and his siblings had been having for years. "Didn't I already admit that I have the most awful name in the history of names?"

All of the assembled cousins easily agreed with that, but if anything his nieces and nephews had been discussing for the past few hours was anything to go by, Ron was willing to bet Albus Severus Potter wouldn't be holding that title for much longer.