Lament from sin..
The moment you look away..a drop.
The moment you say the last word..a drop.
The moment you look at her..a drop.
At the thousandth drip, I realize my sin..
Dreaming of the sky from the ground...
That was my sin...
There was a small creak at the door and a streak of sunlight filtered into the dark, gloomy chamber. Clicking on the lights, Kotobuki Kira scanned the music room carefully, and smiled. "Yokata, it's vacant." Quietly tip-toeing into the room, Kira slumped on to one of the chairs and carefully caressed her arms. Ever since the trip to the temple, everything seemed so hectic.
For one thing, there was always detention in the council room after Suoh and Akira have gone. Nokoru usually dumped the remaining paperworks on her and left to socialize around the school. The documents she received were very tedious, and yes boring. No wonder he always hated them. Still, the charming blonde president wasn't calleda feminist for nothing. His habits of being polite to ladies even to unpredictable and strange ones like Kira lagged along beside him since elementary school. Even though he could have just gone home by himself, Nokoru always waited for her finish all her detention duties. Looking at the returned handkerchief she has lent to Nokoru, Kira made a small smile as she retraced her recollections of yesterday evening.
Flashback
As usual the Clamp clock tower struck eight when Kira served her time stuck in Nokoru's office busying herself with piles and piles of documents. Darkness fell on the school grounds and yet Kira could easily detect the shape of Nokoru's lean and tall figure beside the gigantic Japanese cypress tree he used as his natural hideout.
"Gomen, how many hours did you wait out here?" Kira asked as she tried to catch her breath from running down the hill.
"Do you think NASA wants my brains for nothing? Of course I am not an idiot to stand around waiting in this windy weather." Nokoru grinned teasingly as he grabbed Kira's school case for her, but his arms drooped to the ground as soon as Kira handed it to him. Although Kira could tell that he was in the cold for at least an hour due to his trembling blue lips, she just ignored them, smiling to herself.
"Why is it so heavy? Did you stuff rocks in here to prank me?" The pair of gleaming cyan eyes glared accusingly at Kira who was in this case making fun of Nokoru's lack of athletic abilities.
"Iie, why would I stuff rocks in there, silly? It's just heavy because it is piled with my music stuff since I got to practice for my upcoming solo." Kira replied as she took her case back and climbed into the limo.
"Eh? I thought the music concert is not until autumn? Why prepare so early?" Nokoru questioned as he too pulled himself into the warm backseat of the limo.
"Thought you would already know by now since you are the Clamp high school's most respected and adored student council president that I would be a senior in autumn and how great expectations this academy has for young musicians." Kira answered cooly as she leaned against the soft leather seat. "One more day of detention and I would finally get rid of something from my to-do list."
That was when Nokoru noticed pools of dark circles under Kira's eyes since he first thought them as a bad eye-liner disaster, feeling guilty at the thought that the cause of Kira's exhaustion and lack of sleep was all his fault. "Um, Kira." Nokoru gently shaked Kira's shoulder and relieved when she didn't flinch although it was the shoulder with the nasty cut. "Yeah, what?" Kira answered, still both eyes tightly closed. "My burn is healed. It's all well now thanks to you. You are pretty smarter than I thought?" Nokoru teased playfully and handed her the handkerchief he borrowed when Kira opened her amber eyes and looked straight into his blue ones with a wry smile on her lips.
"Are you calling me dumb?" Kira sat up and straightened herself as she retreived her handkerchief back. "Well, judging by your working habits in biology classes, you can't really call yourself smart either." Nokoru chuckled gleefully. Frowning slightly, Kira turned her back to Nokoru and glanced the view outside the window. "Hey, your not mad at me, ne?" Nokoru felt slightly guilty. After he heard someone sobbing inside Kira's room last Friday, Nokoru didn't feel annoyed or disgruntled of Kira anymore. In fact, he kind of wanted to be her friend.
"Want to hear a story?" Kira mumbled as she slightly turned away from the cool glass. "'Uh, sure." Nokoru answered abruptly and guessed that changing the subject was Kira's way of forgiving. "It's about this handkerchief. I got this thing from an old man I knew since I could remember from Denmark. His name was 'James Hendrickson', and he was filled with stories." Assuming that he will be one of the old men Kira helped out in the senior's home for volunteering credits at school, Nokoru kept on listening. "When Hendrickson san was just a young boy, Denmark became occupated by the German Nazis. His family lost all of their valuables and could no longer eat fancy dishes due to lack of wealth. But the people who were really in need were the Jews."
Thinking it will be one of those historical moments of the second world war, Nokoru looked up at the ceiling of the car and pretended to be interested. Since he already finished the history of the Nazis when he was only in grade three, not to say that he already wrote a twelve page thesis about the cause and effects about the treacherous dictator Adolf Hitler in grade four. "So, Hendrickson san had a close friend and neighbor who was Jewish called, sorry forgot the name. Oh well, as I was saying this Jewish friend of his had to go in hiding. He decided to go hide in Hendrickson san's basement until he find a way to flee to Switzerlnd, but a problem occured once again. Since the Gestapo carried specially trained dogs who can scent Jews, hiding couldn't become an opportunity." Kira murmured as she twirled and twirled the handkerchief in her hand, and Nokoru suddenly became interested in the story.
"So? What's your point?"Nokoru prodded Kira to go along with the story. "Okay, 'I am almost there. Hm, where were we? Oh yeah, so this handkerchief have this special ability to numb the senses of smell of the dog, it practically saved the Jews' life." And then she added. "He told me this tale when I tripped on his doorstep, and when my knee was bleeding very badly. Telling me that everything will be okay that the bleeding will stop as he wrapped this handkrchief around my knee. Then, the pain and the blood went away. It just disappeared..."
Listening carefully, Nokoru could feel the reminiscence of the recent tale of Kira. He could tell that she missed Denmark, the land which was her home. Her back to him, Kira was still mumbling something under her breath. What made Nokoru hurt most wasn't the burn on his palm all along. It was that painfully familiar look melancholy reflected on the window. Just as he was about to cheer her up about his birthday party and that she can get a day off for detention tomorrow to attend the dinner party, a voice sounding distant slipped from Kira's lips and pemeated into his ears. "Come to think of it, there were so many peope who cared for me all along, you, Hendrickson san, and my parents.." Again, Nokoru wondered why she always had that hollow and melancholy look in her eyes everytime she mentions about her parents.
When Nokoru tried to ask Kira about her parents, he was caught off guard and his lips suddenly got tangled as if it was resisting to speak. "Somehow, I never cared for someone and showed it through my action. Actually, I was quite the opposite. Causing pain when I was the one responsible, smearing tears on the cheeks I love the most, and I already left my most beloved person to die and rot away.." From what Nokoru noticed, the two glowing amber eyes reflected off the icy cold window seemed to grow distant by the passing minute. Moving his hand unintentionally toward Kira, Nokoru felt something more that pity for her. Hovering just an inch from Kira's shoulder, Nokoru almost grabbed her by the arm not if the sudden Saku san's cheerful notice for their arrival.
Turning her back toward him, Nokoru quickly hid both of his hand behind his back as Kira made her usual straight face at him as if nothing happened when something did show up on her face while she mentioned about how she blamed herself for causing so much pain on so someone she love. Confessing her sin right in front of him, showing her weakened spot without a tear.
"Well, I'll get going. See you tommorrow morning Nokoru, ja." She said in the most cheerful way. Too cheerful. Nokoru could tell that she was faking her smile. But for what? And what was that tugging urge in his heart just now. It was similar to the one at the lake yet stronger and clearer. This time he showed his feelings in action, lucky that Kira didn't see it. The stretch of his arm and the honest yet the desperate look in his eyes was a forbidden gesture for an Imonoyama, and he himself was the one who was best at this in his family.
Still sitting on his car seat despite Saku san's questions about this weird situation, Nokoru gazed straight at Kira's back until it disappeared from the dark. 'Who will be that loved person who Kira caused so much pain, and why is she being so guilty about it? Will she answer who it is if I ask? Will she?' But, Nokoru couldn't run up and just ask. He was scared he will trouble Kira's already disheveled mood. 'I got something though. She must have some painful past, something about her family, and she caused a terrible sin in the past she hopes to hide. I know the big picture of it, now I just have to know the details.'
As Nokoru walked in his usual elegant walk toward the mansion, he picked out a slightly wrinkled envelope from his side pocket. The two letters written clearly on the right hand side of the paper was quickly erased and replaced into two new ones. Gazing at Kira's balcony, Nokoru reluctantly gripped on the envelope tighter. 'If she committed some sort of crime, it is best to keep my distance now...'
.
.
.
.
Beware Kira, you will be chased out of this country yet again..
Waking up in alarm, Kira gazed dumbfoundedly around the room and tried to focus of what was going on here. Yes, she have dosed off in the music room and that is why she was just sleeping there on the chair with her music sheets piled up on her lap. Since she was sleeping in an uncomfortable position, Kira felt as if she had a bad nightmare. She was walking in the dark and she could feel hot yet a piercing gaze searing down her back. Although Kira was sure it was someone looking right through her, she wasn't sure who would it be. Twirling the handkerchief in her hand and yawning at the same time, Kira shrugged off the unpleasant memory of yesterday. It was supposed to cheer her up, but it somehow backfired and made her realize what a terrible mistake she have made back in the limo. Come to think of it, Nokoru haven't spoken to her since that night.
'What kind of a freak will he think I am?' Kira muttered under her breath as she tried to think of something different.
'Nokoru's birthday.' All the girls in the district were busy like a bee in this week, and the day has come. Nokoru's birthday. This week was especially tiring for Kira since she didn't have any clue what to give him. Anita told her she was going to give him a gliding model which he liked the best from her gliding model collection. Eventually, Kira has been running around the campus mall right after detention, but there wasn't anything good enough to buy for an Imonoyama.
'Should I bake something? No, Akira san will do that. What about I knit a nice scarf, I used to make them for Hendrickson san. No, the weather is getting warmer. What about.. What about.' Her head was filled with worries and choices, and today was the deadline. Sighing, Kira opened her harp case and strung some of the strings while staring into space. Strumming any tune she knew, Kira slowly closed her eyes, only her fingers awake. 'A month has passed since I came here.' All the new memories lushed past her as she opened her eyes.
Kira began to strum the strings faster and faster until she felt peaceful. The melody of her harp always seemed to calm her down. Today was also the last day of her detention and flipped through her music folder. Kira's music teacher was rushing his pupils to ready their solo pieces, and especially for Kira, she haven't chose one yet. 'So many things are troubling me this week.' The rhythmical sound seemed to soothe Kira's mind. 'I hope the time will stop like this forever. At least I am worrying about something a normal school girl would worry about. Not the sort of problems 'Kotobuki Kira' would...' She should be grateful, right?
Too much time have passed. Kira felt happy that she had something to worry about other than her father's secret and her insecurities. Somehow she have adapted and learned how to heal her own pains. Listening the tune over and over again, Kira fell into one of her dreams again. Then, her rhythmical strokes were suddenly interrupted by a group of stridents' shrill laughters.
Frowning, Kira lifted up the only window of the conservatory. Yes, and there he was. Imonoyama Nokoru being lionized by a huge horde of female students, not only from the high school district, but also from the unversity, junior high, and elementary too! Somehow the banging of her harp made her wake up from one of her futile desires. "Damn it!" Kira muttered as she picked up her harp and examined for any rusts or scratches.
Closing the window and drawing the thick, velvet curtains determinedly, Kira slumped down to the floor. Yes, there were some scratches on her harp, but that wasn't the only reason for the sudden downfall. Again, Kira strummed some of the strings. Maybe she needed a different antidote. Music couldn't cheer her up any more. 'Instruments can be fixed, hearts cannot.'
If Kira only hadn't dropped her harp, her heart would have ached even more since she wasn't the only one with a damaged heart.
Kyogoku Midoriko sat behind one of her lavender bushes, and peeked out three times in a row at a blonde haired boy who had flashing white teeth, warm, blue eyes which tinkled with affable gratitude, and never-ending smiles. "Come on, Midoriko you can do this." She kept repeating to herself since Kyogoku Midoriko, one of the proudest and the smartest girl in the campus admitting her huge crush on the youngest heir of the Imonoyama zabitsu years ago, and she couldn't forget the day when she presented her lavender bushes to Nokoru for the first time.
That day was the happiest time in her life, when he actually hugged her in a warm embrace despite the cold rain. That day's memory always made her cheer up as she tried to get up, but quickly sat down again, her face blushing furiously. 'Gosh, did he see me?' But, Midoriko's uneasy glances couldn't be spotted by the young Imonoyama because of his two colleagues who were dashing their best to pursue their runaway senpai.
"KAICHOU!" Suoh's voice seemed to attract some of the women from the crowd to him which made an opportunity to Nokoru to escape. "Thank you ladies for your overqualified gifts. And sorry if I can excuse." Nokoru yelled out loud as he ran in the opposite way while waving to the girls who were sighing of inconvenience. "Kaichou, there are mountains of paperwork, please come back!" This time Akira screamed which made the female students become even more excited.
"Go, gomene Akira. Just leave it for Kira san! And, Suoh can I just go? Just for today?" Nokoru yelled out desperately. 'I don't want to do that lousy paperwork on my birthday. Please, give me a break.' Nokoru's fan flipped open to hid his mocking smile. The writings on the fan indicated 'patience' in chinese character. Old habits die hard. It seemed harder to slack off from council works as he got older. The pile of documents just piled up higher, and Suoh's ninja skills just seemed to be improving by the minute which even made harder for the poor, blonde president to escape.
Midoriko looked up cautiously from her hiding place due to the sudden turbulence. The delighted shrieks of the female students and Suoh and Akira's powerless attempts to free themselves from the mob of at least two hundered females somehow woke Midoriko from her daydream and she immediately figured out what was happening. Grinning, Midoriko stood up completely from the lavender bushes. The cute charmer had slacked off from his duties again. That was one of the personalities of Nokoru which Midoriko simply adored.
'Our personalities so similar and opposite at the same time. It feels our lives are entwined.' Then her lips which were just formed into a delighted grin, was now replaced by a wry, crooked frown. Looking down at the neat pot plant of a young lavender which was wrapped impeccably in transparent wrapping paper with light green pokadots and hearts, Midoriko sighed. She wanted her gift to be special to chairman than other gifts by her school-mates. Hugging the pot-plant closer to her bosom, Midoriko felt crestfallen. 'I guess I won't be able to send this to him right now.'
Suddenly, the pot-plant seemed so pointless and useless now as Midoriko turned around with another heaving sigh. Then, a firm, soft hand grabbed her by the wrist and the other covered up her mouth which made a short gasp escape from Midoriko's lips. Before she could scream for help, she figured out the owner of the amoroso, yet the confident grip wouldn't be one of a crook's or a burglar's. She wanted to hold this hand for so long, and remembered the touch ever since the rainy day of May four years ago. With the edge of her vision, Midoriko could catch a hint of golden strands and ivory skin.
"No, noko..." Midoriko tried to express her delight of seeing him, but her muffled words were interrupted by a desperate hush which was escaped from Nokoru's angelic lips. Then, Midoriko heard something outside of the lavender bush. Sound of footsteps.
"Where did Kaichou go? He was running toward here a moment ago. Can you spot him Iiyujin?" Suoh called to his kouhai who was in this case high up in a tree, trying to find the missing senpai. "Iie, Takamura senpai. I can't see him." Akira called back and landed on to the ground in one, swift leap. Instead of scolding for not finding the chairman, Suoh just sighed with his fingers on his temple while Akira made an apologetic grin. "Alright Iiyujin, you know the drill. You go to the left, I'll go to the right. If you see him give me a sign, ne?" Suoh quickly ran in the opposite direction and Akira did the same.
As the foorsteps of his two colleagues died away, Nokoru slowly released the grip which was held tightly against Midoriko's wrist. "Go, gomenasai Kyogoku san. Please forgive my disrespectful behaviour." Midoriko tried to stop herself from blushing furiously and shuffled away in an embarassed way. "No, no it is alright for me." Midoriko stammered as she tried to hide her pot plant behind her back. "Would you mind if I stay behind your most beloved lavender bushes?" Nokoru flashed a smile at her as he flipped open his fan. 'I know I am not supposed to put another woman above others, but Midoriko san is just too interesting.'
"Ha, hai. Chairman." Midoriko finally composed herself from the alarming appearance of her immacualte classmate. Smoothing her skirt, Midoriko tried to act like herself as possible. Peering at her pot plant and then at Nokoru's reckless smile, Midoriko made a small sigh. "Do you have something to say, Midoriko san?" Nokoru prompted carefully. He was glad he could be in his perfect, calm self in front of Midoriko unlike himself in Kira's view. "Midoriko san." The blonde class rep flinched and looked down quickly to her hands. "You know what." Her heart kept beating faster and faster. "I am glad I thought of your lavender bushes as my hideout." Nokoru murmured as he tried to get to the part he wanted to say. Midoriko felt her face growing red again. 'How can he say every words with such a compliment.
"A, arigato, chairman." Midoriko mumbled grateful words of thanks as her eyes traced down to Nokoru's side pocket. A small white envelope was peeking out which was tucked in tightly. "Oh, this?" Nokoru asked when he discovered Midoriko's green eyes falling on the envelope. "Actually, I hid in your lavender bushes purposefully." Nokoru added as he fumbled the envelope out of his pocket. "To give you this." The blonde class rep's green eyes sparkled with the most grace. 'For me? He is giving this for me and only me.' Unlike her usual casualness, Midoriko ripped open the envelope and took out the light pink colored paper with a hurrying manner.
Nokoru grinned all this time and chuckled a warm laugh when he saw Midoriko's half surprised and half pleased. "Really, are you inviting me? I thought this was only privately sent to the Elementary council and the other two detectives." The sparkling green eyes almost welled up in tears as Midoriko tried to urge the clear liquid of true bliss from spilling out. She didn't wish to cry in front of her most beloved person. "So, can you come?" Nokoru pressed even though he already knew her answer. "Of, of course, Nokoru. I mean, kaichou." Midoriko's cheeks turned into peach pink as she said his name.
"Well then, I guess I better go. Poor Suoh and Akira will need some new shoe leather for running around the whole campus. Ja ne." Nokoru gave her a playful wink and turned away. "Wait, kaichou." Midoriko put all her courage to hold Nokoru. "What is it, Kyogoku san?" Midoriko half whispered and half murmured the words as she held up her lavender flower pot. "Well, I thought I might as well give something to you in return since you gave me the pleasure of inviting me to your birthday party." Nokoru caressed the plant with his delicate fingers. "Thank you for the gift, Midoriko san. I hope I am worthy for this lovely flower. This lavender will make a good place on my desk beside the wisteria." Nokoru flashed a grateful smile at Midoriko. "I will pick you up in my limo around 7:00, kay?" Nokoru stroked her soft blonde strands and left with a warm wave of the hands.
After a few minutes that felt like hours, Midoriko slowly got up from the ground still touching her hair where once been touched by Nokoru. Her Nokoru, only her's for that short moment. Only the thought of the touch felt like a dream for her. 'I got invited. Only me. Specially. No one else.' Midoriko felt blissful as she stumbled toward her classroom clutching on the hems of her skirt for balance. Looking at the neat italic handwriting of Nokoru for the one last time, Midoriko discovered that her name was written on a word which could have been erased absentmindedly or with too much force. The faded letters under her name could not be discovered yet Midoriko was sure it was someone's name. Someone who could have been invited instead of herself. Someone who somehow made her way through Nokoru's mind and got written on this invitation then got erased.
'What could this possibly mean? Does this mean I am not the only one?' Then, a familiar voice passed through Midoriko's ears. A voice she was so annoyed of. "Gonnichiwa, Midoriko san." Kira said her usual afternoon greeting as she came out of the dark conservatory while Midoriko eyed Kira who was slowly passing beside her and their eyes somehow met. She suddenly transformed her green eyes in a cool composure and looked at the amber ones straight back. But instead of a fiery amber glow, Kira's amber gave away nothing but the same shape and feeling Midoriko was so fond of.
The pain of unrequited love...
"Well, see you at the restaurant Kaichou!" Akira exclaimed cheerfully as he packed up his school case. "Are you sure you can bring all those gifts by yourself?" The blue haired ninja said in a concerned manner. "Everything is fine, really. Suoh, Akira. There is already a truck or two waiting beside the limo, so glad Saku san remembered my birthday and rented them." 'How can he not?' Both Suoh and Akira shook their heads in a sincere manner. Working with the youngest Imonoyama zabitsu for years and years, they never seen him selfish once. "Anyway, I already opened most of the presents you know. So do not worry, Suoh." Nokoru assured his bodyguard with the pat to the back. "I just wonder how Kaichou got all those gifts and made every different praise for each of them, Takamura senpai." Akira said while closing the council door behind his back. Suoh didn't reply, then a thought came to him.
"Hey, don't you think it's weird that Kaichou is making us dismiss early today?" Suoh blurted out suddenly that Akira was quite taken aback. "Well, of course Kaichou would want to give us enough time to get us ready for the party and to pick up Nagisa san and Utako chan?" Just then, both Suoh and Akira turned from the abrupt sound of footsteps behind them. "Oh, it was only you Kotobuki san!" Akira exclaimed. Unlike the playful raven-haired boy, Suoh just bowed curtly and eyed the newcomer carefully. "Kaichou will be at the council room." Suoh spoke in an aloof manner. "Aren't you going to get ready for the party? I think you will have a fun time with us all. Kaichou will be so sad since he will have no one to go with except for Rijichou perhaps." Before Suoh tried to remind his kouhai for his tactless behaviour, Kira responded to Akira friendly welcome.
"I can't go." Kira said trying to sound hopeful. "You can't go, why? You are kaichou's cousin." Akira suddenly protruded his pouty lips. Instead of Kira's weak reply, Suoh responded. "Kira san can't go and anyway, kaichou will come with Kyogoku san." Kira had just made a weak smile, but her smile faded away when the double doors opened and pushed her away. "What's going on? Oh, and the paperworks are all stacked on the snack table, Kira san." Nokoru said hastily as he slipped past Kira and headed straight to his colleagues. "Have a good time." Kira forced a smile back on her lips and waved her usual wave as if nothing happened. Suoh just bowed his brusque bow and Akira waved friendly back at her. For Nokoru, well he just waved without looking back, his coat hanging limply in his arm. "Good bye. And, and happy..."
But before Kira could say all this Nokoru just left from her sight, just like that. Looking at the small gift box in her palm, Kira sighed as she slowly worked her way through in the council office. Nokoru didn't look at her not even once. How can he? What did she do wrong all of a sudden? Gazing the council room thoiughtfully, Kira noticed something unfamilliar on the main president's desk. Climbing up the steps carefully, Kira discovered the thing was a plant. The radiant sunlight spreading out through the tightly drawn curtains made its' flourishing violet petals shine ever more brightly. It reminded Kira of someone... Someone who is always shining brightly like this plant. Kira thought as she stroked the leaves with pain. A tear or two fell down on the lavender leaf like a pristine drop of morning dew. Remebering the words Suoh have said to her made another scar on Kira's heart. 'Kaichou will come with Kyogoku san.'
Wiping away the tears with her sleeve, Kira gazed numbly at the healthy lavender plant. She have already decided not to interfere in Nokoru's life. He is a son of a billionare, she is just one of the many orphans in Japan. Imonoyama Nokoru gets noticed and remembered by the country. Kotobuki Kira gets forgotton and neglected from the country. 'Were all your kindness a fake?' Kira could see a glimpse of Nokoru through the velvet curtains as she remembered all the virtues he have shown her.
The time when he shown her a charming, friendly smile at the lake.
But, again he turned cold after being so cheerful like that. Was that smile a fake?
The time when he comforted her the aching memories of her father.
But, again he became distant and aloof afterwards. Was that comfort a fake?
'Was it all a lie? Well, what can I expect, he is an Imonoyama. Different distant...'
Walking casually toward his limo, Nokoru tried his best to ignore the whispers of Suoh and Akira. "So Kyogoku san is coming with us instead of Kotobuki san?" Akira asked as his dark eyes moved from side to side with alarm. "Yes, it is. Didn't you know?" Suoh whispered urgently. "Then what about Kira san?" Akira whispered back. "Utako chan was so eager to meet her." Suoh just sighing, shook his head twice. "Nagisa san wanted to see her too, but she can see Kira next time when there is a chance. Besides, I too am kind of worried. Have you seen kaichou's reaction to Kira san just now? This is like the first time he acted like that to a female. Don't you think it's weird, Iiyujin?" Suoh muttered under his breath, then winced when Nokoru looked back at him.
"You know, Suoh, Akira." Nokoru started as he took a step towrds them. "I think you guys should know this, but I heard something strange from Kira san just yesterday." Suoh and Akira went all wide eyed at the sudden topic. "You see, she said she caused a great sin in her life. What do you think it might be?" Nokoru prompted. "Well, if she could confess it to you, then it might not be such a bad one after all." Akira suggested. "But Iiyujin, kaichou is a feminist and a well-known ladies' man. Don't you think Kira san would think he would understand and confess something she wouldn't to him?" Suoh replied not only to Akira but to his senpai as well.
"You got a point there, Suoh. But, for now I guess I should try to avoid her." Nokoru responded as he climbed into the limo while Suoh and Akira got in after him. After the serious matter of his so-called cousin, the whole conversation turned into their usual banter. Such as, the amount of paperwork due tommorrow, the wonderful dinner party for tonight, and Nokoru's eager guesses of what the presents from Suoh and Akira will be. Despite all these normal and ordinary conversations, a thought kept reminding Nokoru and ringing inside his head the whole time just like before when he was waiting for Kira and accidentally fell asleep under the stairs.
'Her past is not the real reason you her acting to her like this, isn't it?'
'What do you mean?'
'You already know that isn't real.'
'Or course it is. How can I not know my feelings.'
'Stop lying. You know you are avoiding her to not feel something you shouldn't feel.'
And yes, it was true to be honest. Kira's past and her mysterious sins she confessed was not the real reason. It wasn't even part of it. The true reason for his cold shoulder and ignorings was because of him not her. The tugging and urging in his heart whenever she makes that hollow and painfully familiar look was the true reason. He just didn't want to admit it. No, scratch that. He just can't admit it. How can he, when he wasn't supposed to be?
Dropping off Suoh and Akira, Nokoru himself too got off in front if his mansion. Getting ready for the dinner party, Nokoru stripped himself from his school uniform and pulled himself an expensive pair of dress pants and a tuxedo. The fabulous blue suit looked just right for his matching blue eyes. Not too flashy yet elegant. Placing both of his hands on the doors of his enormous wardrobe, Nokoru hesitated. Beside the elaborate suits and expensive men's attires, a particular white dress caught the corner of his eye. The dress was exactly the size of someone Nokoru was meant to give it to. It would have flowed right down to her knees and the tight shoulder line would have showed off her figure. The golden hems and the carefully stitched sleeves were in a perfect harmony. And that wasn't all. There was also a matching choker with a single rose plucked in which completed the look.
Although Nokoru never thought Kira was actually pretty, but he had to admit that if she wore this dress, she would've exceeded normal beauty. Shaking his head, Nokoru tried to close the doors again, but hesitated once more. 'It's no use anymore. She is not going to come anyway. But, still..' Sighing, Nokoru picked up the dress by its' hanger and strolled out of his room. Since he already bought it, might as well just give it to her. She might need it anytime since by the looks of it, Kira didn't seem to own any kind of dress.
Opening the double doors of Kira's bed chamber, Nokoru hesitated yet again while trying to hang it in Kira's wardrobe. Ripping off the price tag and picking out a piece of orgami paper from her desk, Nokoru wrote a short note by faking Rijichou's italic handwriting. He had to scratch out and had to get at least five more orgami papers to write the best one.
Kira san, think of this as a late arrival gift.
I hope you will like it.
-Rijichou-
"Yoshi!" Nokoru exclaimed while wiping a sweat from his brow. Crumpling and dumping the other four crumple papers into the wastebasket, Nokoru smiled with glee. 'Now she will never know I would have given it to her.' Looking around the room for the best place to put his note and the dress, Nokoru thought the wardrobe would be too half-hearted. A single, notable doll by Kira's bedpost caught the corner of his eye.
Moving closer, Nokoru noticed that it was the doll Kira always bragged about it, and he could see why. The doll looked expensive for someone like Kira to buy. Maybe she got it as a gift. Plus, it somhow looked like Kira too except more graceful and perfect. Somehow the other version of her... Somehow so reminding...
Shaking his head from the thought, Nokoru carefully tucked the note in the doll's cupped hands and hung the dress on the edge of the bedpost. A sudden smile spreaded across of his lips of the thought of Kira being surprised, but the smile soon faded into a horror filled disbelief when he looked at the clock. 'Oh my gosh, I am definitely late!' Nokoru scrambled out of Kira's room, and raced down the halway keeping his cool composure. The clock tolled seven, and Nokoru's heart raced for each toll.
'Midoriko san must be waiting for so long. How can I be such an idiot?' Making a slight frown on his face, Nokoru remembered about the smile he had made back in Kira's bedroom.
'I only did it for guilt, right? Only for guilt. Nothing more...'
Author's Note: Well, how was it? I made the twist between the love triangle a main idea here. ^ㅡ^
Hoped you like it, and thanks to 'James Birdsong' for reviewing my last one.
This one took a lot of time, since I suck in emotional parts. *Swear Drops* ^ㅁ^
Please RnR~