Fic: Rachel Needs Some Action
Chapter 5: Teasing
Author: deeha
Rating: M
Disclaimer: I do not own Glee. This chapter may get...descriptive.
Summary: Tina thinks that Rachel needs to get some action. Rachel's just been busy. But when Santana comes into the picture, Rachel seems to be less busy.
Rachel's in a taxi on her way to work, which is in a studio in the city. She's got her granola bar and water bottle and is ready to begin her meditation in the taxi. But it's cut short when Tina calls her.
"Hey so what are you doing today?"
"Its Monday I'm going to work and then I'll go home to practice Celine Dion's The Prayer." Rachel says very seriously.
"Ok no. Go out."
"Tina, why are you so preoccupied with getting me out?"
"Because, I don't like cats."
"I don't understand."
"Single people end up getting cats. And then when you die, I'll end up with the cat. And. I don't like cats."
"You know. There is something seriously wrong with you."
"Rachel, come on. Be serious. You are in this funk, and you're getting rusty. You might forget how to have sex."
"Oh that's preposterous."
"Well when was the last time Rachel?"
"None of your business."
"That's sounds like you can't remember."
"I almost kissed Santana!" a very frustrated Rachel yelps into her phone.
A second passes.
"Really?"
"Yes."
"Where?"
"On the mouth."
"No I meant like where? I just saw you yesterday where could you guys have gone?"
"Well we went grocery shopping."
"Really?"
"Yes."
"Why?"
"I'm not sure how there can be any answer to that question other than: we needed groceries."
"Ok. Go on."
"I cooked Mac n' Cheese."
"You cooked her Mac n' Cheese?"
"Yes."
"For her?"
"Well, yes."
"Ok. Go on."
"And then she put on some records and we started dancing and singing."
"Wait. Did you eat the Mac n' Cheese?"
"Tina. I almost kissed Santana."
Then Rachel can hear Tina talking away from her phone. "No Mike I'm talking to Rach. No we don't have Mac 'n Cheese. Wait I'll ask her."
"Rach, do you have any left overs?"
"Tina."
"Ok (no Mike). Go on."
"Well, what do I do?"
"About what?"
"Santana."
"Well do you want to kiss her?"
"I don't know. And honestly I don't know if she likes me. She could just be using me to feed her."
"You're telling me you did laundry and went grocery shopping with her? And had fun. That's boring. God, Mike would be chopping at the bit."
Rachel is sort of agreeing.
"You should...get together with her."
Rachel is not agreeing.
"What? Are you drunk? What happened to Mike? Are you alone? I'm really worried about your state of mind."
"Ok. Please. Be more obvious."
"Obvious about what?"
"That you don't think it's a bad idea."
"Hardly. I think it's a terrible idea. There are about fifty reasons why that would be a bad idea. The top three come to mind: one - she has threatened to kill me before."
"Oh, she didn't mean it! We all wanted to kill you when we lost nationals."
"Two. She hates my clothing style."
"Which is not true because I've already burned all your argyle. And your theories on 4 inch heels making your legs longer is like very close to be fact."
"I will never forgive you for burning my argyle. Just thinking about all the waste you did. I could've donated it."
"Honey, no one would've worn that. What's number three?"
"Three. She and I have no chemistry."
"Ohhhhhh shut the front door. You have so much chemistry that you guys are about to explode."
"Again. Are you alright? Tina you're using very poorly thought out euphemisms."
The Taxi is in front of the studio. Rachel tips the driver and enters the building to get on the elevator to the sixth floor.
"Look we already know she loves to hear you sing."
"I wish I didn't tell you that."
"I bet you she still has your picture."
"Again, I wish I didn't tell you that."
"It's such a romantic little story, Rachel! You asking her to put your high school picture in her locker...and she does. Seriously when you told me that I didn't think it was a big deal. But now if you put it in the right context."
"You mean in your distorted context. I was merely mending our friendship!"
"If she still has it, it's a sign."
"Yes a verifiable sign that she forgot she had it."
"Fine. Fight with me all you want but you and Santana had some pretty hot duets and I'm sure she wouldn't mind making some more music with you if you know what I mean."
"Yes. I know what you mean. Again with your thinly veiled double entredres..."
"Ok, Mike just took off his shirt. So I have to go. But, obviously there must be something about her that lets you forgive her for all of that stuff you're hung up on! And you said you were the one who almost kissed her."
"Actually that was much more germane and helpful. Thank you Tina."
"Ok, go record some commercials. And don't forget to kiss her. You're Rachel Berry. You can do whatever you set your mind to."
Rachel hangs up the phone and goes into the studio with gusto.
"Ok, Rachel we are going to take it from the top. Again."
Rachel was eating it.
She could not for the life of her get the jingle out right.
The line was: Starbursts. Starbursts. Such a juicy, juicy, contradiction.
Every time she tried to sing it, it just got more and more incredibly raunchy in her mind.
The music starts and her cue is in the fourth bar.
"Santana. Santana. Such a juicy, juicy, contradiction."
"CUT."
Rachel face palms.
The next jingle isn't any better.
"Rachel, ok so this one should be easy," the studio engineer says. "There is absolutely nothing in here sexual. Or that even rhymes with Santana. Whoever that is. Just say: Office Depot. Taking Care of Business."
The track starts playing. And Rachel is rehearsing the line over again in her mind.
3...
2...
1...
"Santana sexpot. Taking Care of Business."
"Take a five minute break please."
Rachel doesn't get home until late. She was lucky to still have a job.
She couldn't understand why Santana kept sneaking up in her thoughts. Freudian slips were something a recording artist should not have. She needed to fix this, and fast. Practicing tongue twisters were on her mind. (Without assistance. Focus.)
But when she gets home, a post-it is on her door that asks: Want to go to Ikea with me?
They walk around Ikea while eating crackers they bought at the bistro.
"What are you looking for?" Rachel asks.
"I need stringy lights, a rug, and a bulletin board. I want to get it before my Ma gets here tomorrow. She's coming for my opening night on Friday."
"Oh you start Friday? Exciting!"
"Yes, will you come? I'm going text Tina and Mike later. But you know...I hope they'll let her in. She might be blacklisted or something."
Rachel laughs. "Well, I will definitely be there."
"Great! Hey want to see how many couches we can make out on before they kick us out?"
Rachel tries to kick at Santana, who is just laughing down the aisle.
They get back to the apartment complex, and it's the first time that Rachel's been in Santana's apartment. Santana has most of her stuff out but there are still a couple boxes still taped up.
"Bienvenidos a mi casa." Santana says as she ushers Rachel inside.
Rachel loves what she sees. It looks like Santana likes candles and Santana has just as big a music collection as Rachel does.
"Do you want something to drink? I have...wine in a box."
Rachel laughs.
"You'll have to help me find cups, though. I didn't unpack any of my kitchen stuff yet."
Rachel likes the idea that Santana unpacked her music collection first before other necessaries.
"Help me open some of the boxes."
They open a couple boxes, and Rachel gets one that has picture frames and loose photos in it. And, in that box, is Rachel's high school picture.
"Did you find any cups?" Santana asks.
"No, I just found a sign."
"What?"
"Nothing. I think I found your pictures. You kept my high school photo?"
"Oh, yea. It's cute."
And like that was all the explanation that was needed.
Santana opens a box that has some of her dresses.
"Hey you can help me pick out what to wear for my opening on Friday."
Santana migrates to her bedroom and lays the dresses on the bed. The only place that Rachel can sit is on the bed next to said dresses. There are exactly three different dresses. Rachel sits on the bed and looks at the different styles and tries to imagine what they would look like on Santana.
"Santana these are cute...what are you..."
Santana was standing next to Rachel. In just her underwear. A black lace set...that really...leaves nothing to the imagination...and leaves Rachel speechless.
"I think I'll try this black one first." Santana says as she grabs the dress.
Rachel sits. Watching Santana step into the black dress.
It's a rubber band dress with a v neckline and spaghetti straps. Rachel watches as the dress slides up Santana's body and she notices that Santana's toe nails are perfectly manicured red and then she notices that Santana's beautiful legs appear. The dress curves to her body and then as Santana is zipping her dress by pulling the zipper up her back, Rachel sees Santana's hourglass waist appear.
She doesn't dare look up any more because she's been holding her breath this whole time and she might pass out if she sees any more curves. And she knows that Santana has some perfectly round curves...
"Hey can you zip me?"
Santana's backside is towards Rachel. And Rachel can see how Santana's back divets into the dress and the black lace of her bra contrasts against her skin. Santana's skin looks so silky smooth and just so ready to be touched.
But Rachel takes the bottom of the zipper. And ever so slowly, very slowly, zips Santana's dress all the way up as she rises from the bed to do so. And then she hooks the eyelets of the dress and sits back down.
Santana turns around and dips her hand into the bust of the dress to pull her left breast up and then her right. Then she raises both her hands up to pick up and brush back her long raven hair.
"Do you like this one?"
Rachel looks.
Yes. She likes it. More than just likes it. She wants to shake hands with it and say: dress you are doing your job right.
"Let me try on the others ones."
And again Santana's backside is to Rachel. And without asking Rachel knows she is allowed to unhooked the top eyelet of the dress and unzip the dress...all the way down.
When Santana steps out of it, the dress snags on her lace panties and Rachel is transfixed to see how far it will pull. But it snaps back and Santana is already stepping into the next dress.
The next dress is a green sleeveless one with buttons on the back.
Again Santana turns her backside to Rachel and expects her to button her up. Rachel sits at the bed and pulls the first button through its eyelet.
Then the second.
Then the third.
Then the fourth.
Then. Well the fifth is right where Santana's crease is and seriously Rachel just doesn't know how her fingers are keeping still enough to pull that button through its eyelets. But she does it.
And then the sixth.
And the seventh, where she has to stand up.
And the eighth.
And then she's at the ninth where again she is met with the bar of Santana's lace bra.
And finally the tenth, right where Santana's shoulder blades end.
Which Rachel wants to touch so badly but then Santana turns round again and Rachel kind of falls back down onto the bed in a sitting position.
And again Santana dips her hand into her bust to adjust her breasts. And Rachel just watches. Because she is allowed to and this is the best thing she has ever been allowed to watch.
"Do you like this one?"
Rachel just stares.
Santana twists her body to look at herself in her mirror on the wall. She wraps her hair up to see what her profile would be. Which affords Rachel the view of her perfect neck.
"I really like this one." Rachel whispers.
"Mmm. I'd have to wear a different bra with it though. Let me try on the other one."
"Okay." Rachel whispers.
This time Rachel stands at the ready to unbutton Santana who turns around again. But Rachel takes her time and brushes Santana's hair to sweep it with her fingers across Santana's shoulder. She loves how soft Santana's hair is and how easily it moves between her fingers. Of course she must do the obligatory inhale to smell Santana's hair as it whiffs around. It smells like coconut.
She trails her pointer and middle finger down Santana's spine, which elicits a perfect sounding "o" from Santana, right before Rachel unbuttons the first button.
Then the second unbutton reveals the lace bra.
And all the way down to button number five, where Rachel takes a breather.
"Are you okay?" Santana whispers.
"Yes." Rachel whispers back.
And Rachel finishes the last four buttons. Santana just drops the dress in front of her and reaches for the last dress.
This last dress is a red halter top.
Rachel already knows she's going to like this dress.
Santana steps into it and is bending forward towards Rachel who is again sitting on the bed. She gets a lovely view of Santana's deep cleavage.
Santana brings up the two red straps of the dress and is ready to tie it up behind her neck. But Rachel stands and brings her hands up to Santana's and takes the straps from her.
Rachel lets the straps drop down for a little bit so she can look at Santana's bra from the front side.
The lace is just so damn pretty and the swells of Santana breast are so taunt that Rachel can't help but stare. Rachel loves how they rise up and down and she wishes that she could just brush her fingers over them.
Santana is smiling and it's visible that she is breathing just as heavy as Rachel is.
Rachel smiles and then finishes the dress by raising her hands so she could tie the straps behind Santana's neck. She rests her arms on Santana's shoulders like they are about to dance and just looks into her eyes.
"Thanks." Santana says as she grins like a cheshire cat.
Rachel smiles and backs up. She notices that there is a side zipper and zips it up to complete the dress.
"I really should say thank you to you." Rachel says as she can't contain her smile.
She sits back on the bed to admire Santana. And Santana again adjusts herself.
"I like this one. And I could not wear a bra under it." Santana nonchalantly says.
Rachel just groans and falls back on the bed.
Santana laughs.
"Too much?" Santana asks.
Rachel just groans again.
"Too little. You need to wear a parka." Rachel says this as she stares at the ceiling. It's probably the safest place to look right now.
Santana laughs. "Why?"
"Because, you make wearing clothes so damn sexy."
Santana laughs again and begins to unzip the side of her dress which makes Rachel sit up on her elbows.
"Wait!"
"Hrm?" Santana utters in a mid frozen state.
"I want to do that."
Santana quickly zips it back up.
And then Rachel rises from the bed and undresses Santana very slowly, very slowly.
A/N: So. Clothes Porn. :D