October 2000
Sarah had slowly started to accept her illness again and had started to acknowledge the pain and to admit it to Harm. Harm was happy about it because he would be able to helpt her and to ease her pain ion the right time and in the right way.
That she got ill again also meant that she had to go see her doctor again on a regular basis just to make sure that it would not get worse. It was a precaution but to her, it used to be routine, it feals and it felt like a punishement to her.
"Harm!" he joined her in bed. "Are you going to come with me tonorrow?" "Where are you going?" "I have an appointment with my doctor." "Of course I will come with you if you want me to." "I want you to come." Harm knew how afraid she was about the doctors appointment and how nervous she was. She was afraid of what her doctor my say.
The next morning they are at the doctors offcie where the doctor examines Sarah. Harm was holding her hand the whole time trying to calm her down. After the doctor had finished her exam she told them what she had found."
"Sarah you do seem to have a little ulcer that is growing in your uterus." She looked at Harm unsure and scared. "Sarah I know that you probably do not want to hace another operation, as it was hard for you to have the first one, but I would highly recommend that you at least think about it." "Thank you doctor." She left the couple alone to give them time.
"Sarah are you alright?" She shook her head no. he wrapped an arm around her and pulled her into his chest. "How about we go home and talk?" "I would like that." He helped her up and led her to their car and helped her in. After he had gotten in the car they drove home.
At their house in the livingroom was a more comfortable place to talk. "So." Harm had an arm wrapped around her as she was leaning into his chest. She was quiet, quieter then normal. "Sarah talk to me. Please." She turned around a bit to liik at him. He copuld read the pain , hurt and the fear in her eyes and on her face. "Honey I promise you that we will be alright. You will have to trust met." "Harm I trust you with my life." "What is it?" The way she looked at him made his heart break. "I just. I am just not ready to let them perform another operation again Harm." "I want you to listen to me. I love you and you know that. You know that I will support each decision you make no matter what. But I am just asking you to think about your health and what is good for you." She bowed her head and then looked up at him. "Harm….." "Sarah you know that I would not hurt you in any way and that I will support always support you. I am just asking you to think about it." "OK." Sarah got up and told Harm that she will take a walk. Harm watched her go knowing that she needed time to herself to think.
When she come home after a few hours she looked a little tired from her walk. "Hey!" "How was your walk?" "Good. When are you going to pick up the kids?" "Around four?" "Alright." She walked into his waiting arms. She snuggled into his chest trying to forget. He did not talk to her because he knew that it would be useless now. She would talk to him.
When Harm came homw with the children Mac had a big smile on her face. "Mommy!" "Hey Patrick." She knelt down and gave Patrick and Rose a hug and a kiss. She then got up and gave Jeremy and Harmon a kiss. "Mommy can we go eat ice gram today?" Sarah and Harm looked at each other. "I think we can do that Rose." "Yeah." Rose and Patrick went to play and Harm handed Sarah baby Jeremy." So we are going to go eat ice cream today." "Looks like it Harm." She just smiled at him as she went to tend to Jeremy. She and Harm were looking forward to go to the ice gream store with their children.