AN: I'm sooooo sorry for not updating. I've been busy with school and writer's block. This chapter doesn't seem as funny as the others :/

Disclaimer: My birth certificate says my name is (INSERT MY FULL NAME WHICH IS TOP SECRET) and that I'm NOT Japanese... So, no, I'm not Amano Akira and I DON'T own Katekyo Hitman Reborn.

~~~Sawada Household~~~

Lampo was living the life. Great food, a great bed, and servant. By servant, I mean Nana.

"Maman, Lampo-sama wants more grapes," Lampo ordered, holding his plate out.

Nana smiled brightly. "Sure thing, Lampo!"

Yes, Lambo was living like a king. That is... until a certain five-year-old girl — who was quite a looker, in Lampo's opinion; what with that beautifully huge forehead and that amazing fashion sense — named I-Pin appeared.

"Mama, who that?" I-Pin asked, pointing at Lampo. "Broccoli monster?"

"LAMPO-SAMA IS NOT A BROCCOLI MONSTER!" Lampo yelled, enraged. There went the thought of I-Pin being pretty (In Lampo's opinion). The child pulled out a bomb and threw it at I-Pin. "DIE!"

"Lampo, you shouldn't try to kill your siblings," Nana scolded.

Lucky for her, Lampo forgot to light up the bomb. So the house... I mean I-Pin is safe...

~~~Shimon Household~~~

"G~," Giotto sang out. "I need more fangirls, could you tell yours 'Giotto is hotter than me'?"

G's eye twitched. "What fangirls?"

Giotto stared at G. "You have girls stalking you EVERYWHERE! And you didn't notice them," Giotto snorted. "You're stupider than Alaude, the boring dude."

A cold, piercing metal collided with the side of Giotto's head. The blond idiot — er... I mean... — soon-to-be-but-not-yet-boss-that-is-super-sexy turned his sexy-blond-head-of-awesomeness around and saw Alaude, the Supreme Lord of Boring Dudes and Handcuff Wielders and Ugly People.

"Prey," Alaude growled, a sadistic glint in his eyes. "What did you call me?"

"I said you're a super awesome-ly awesome person that is the Supreme Lord of the Milky Way Galaxy?" Giotto said, mentally smirking. Now I won't get beaten up, Giotto thought happily.

But the handcuff wielder did NOT put his weapon(s) down. Instead, the freezing metal of the handcuff collided against the side of Giotto's head. In other words, Giotto lost more brain cells. In other — other — words, the blond idiot is stupider now.

Seeing Alaude getting ready to smack the handcuff against the side of his head again, Giotto tried plan B...

"PLEASE DON'T BEAT ME UP!" Giotto begged, sitting on his knees and hands clasped together. "I can't lose more brain cells, right G?"

G nodded but at the same time, he face-palmed. The moron just admitted he was stupid, G thought.

Annoyed and disturbed with Giotto's patheticness, Alaude walked away. Giotto then stood up and sighed with relief.

"Mamma was right when she said I was lucky," Giotto said, dusting invisible dirt off his pants. "Want to go bribe some Mafia officials?"

G face-palmed. Will there ever be a time when he didn't have to face-palm at Giotto's stupidity?

~~~Some Unknown Place (I don't even know what the place is...)~~~

Reporn, world's second best hitman in the world — um... I mean first (Reborn's the best in this era, old man that possibly watches porn) — walked through that busy streets People in cars were cursing and beeping — at Reporn, to be exact.

"SORTIR DE LA MANERA QUE GOSSA," a man yelled, sticking up his middle finger with one hand and rapidly beeping the car's horn with the other. Dang, this man could multitask. Beeping, cussing, and sticking up his middle finger. Wish my daddy could do that.

The greatest hitman from another era ignored the multitasking man. Why didn't he just kill the man, you may ask? That is classified information... But who cares. I'm a bad boy — err... girl. Reporn walked down the sidewalk — he had finally crossed the damn road.

I need to think of a new name, Reporn thought.

Many names came to mind: الاباحية, порна, অশ্লীল সাহিত্যাদি, порнография, 色情色情pornô, πορνογραφία, પોર્ન, अश्लील, klám, ಪೋರ್ನ್, 포르노, порно, lucah, پورنو, porr, ஆபாச, పోర్ను, สื่อลามก, فحش, khiêu dâm, and פּאָרן.

Those names were all nice and stuff, but they didn't stand out. It then came to him. The perfect name is... Nroper! Ah, yes. What a fine name, indeed. Creative, class, sexiness, hot, awesome, Repornalicious... I've been spending too much time with Useless-Gio, Reporn thought.

A sadistic, murderess, horrifying glint then appeared in his eyes, scaring the crap out of the elderly. The old people ran away — hobbled away — screaming and shrieking a Sawada Tsunayoshi.

"I'm going to torture my useless student, even more than I usually do," Reporn — now Nroper — yelled out of the blue, laughing like a maniac.

What happened to the calm, cool, murderess guy in chapter 7?

~~~A Random Japanese Baseball Field~~~

"Ahahaha," Asari laughed as he appeared in puff of pink smoke that smelled like bubble gum. "I'm so gay!"

A random baseball player stared at Asari. "Takeshi... you prefer guys?"

"No, no! I'm happy," Asari said cheerfully. "My name isn't Takeshi, by the way. It's Asari~."

"Do you know how to play baseball?"

"What's baseball?"

The random baseball player smacked his face in frustration. "You're useless. I'll take you to Dame-Tsuna cousin, Useless-Giotto."

AN: Tee-hee, Asari appeared. Also, if you can guess what the man said and what language he said it in, you get a oneshot and the next chapter dedicated to YOU :3 (I have no life ._.)