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I'm alone, on my own, and that's all I know
I'll be strong, I'll be wrong, oh but life goes on
Oh I'm alone, on my own, and that's all I know
Oh I'm just a girl, trying to find a place in this world

~ A Place in this World by Taylor Swift

I sat looking at the doors remembering that night, it had been a couple weeks after I moved into the house. Jacob had came over unannounced bitching over having to see me because of the 'imprint bull shit'.

I was sitting in the kitchen eating my grilled cheese sandwich when Jacob barged through the door.

"There is this thing called knocking… try it next time." I mumbled going back to my sandwich.

"It's not my damned fault I have to come see you…" I just rolled my eyes, that didn't even deserve a response. I sat there tearing off a part of the sandwich when Jacob walked over to me sitting down in the chair beside mine.

"Your not eating much." He seemed kind of concerned, I just smiled at the thought then looked up at him.

"I eat enough." I said putting the sandwich in my mouth for added measure, Jacob seemed to chuckle before I stood up putting the food in the trash and the dishes in the sink I turned back to him.

"You can go now."

"No I cant… not yet." He said slowly starting to stand up I quickly ducked away from Jacob heading toward my room.

"Well have fun… I'm going to bed." With that I tried to end the conversation and get him to leave but he only followed me stopping the door from closing as he walked into the room behind me, shutting and locking it behind him. I looked at Jacob arching a brow. "What are you doing?" I asked watching Jacob as he walked closer to me, he placed a soft hand on my cheek as he bent down kissing my cheek.

"Please Ami… don't fight me, not tonight." he whispered softly looking into my eyes, there was a needing look there I had never seen before as I started to pull away Jacob let out what sounded like a tortured moan his arm moving to pull me back against his body as he kissed the top of my head. "Amelia…" Something inside of me told me not to fight it… my imprint needed me. Leaning up on tip toe I pressed a soft kiss to his lips, I hated that I wanted to comfort him… I hated that I wanted to be there for him when he wanted nothing to do with me. He returned my soft kiss, his free hand moving up to wrap in my hair as he started walking with me into the master bed room. I heard the soft click of the door as it closed. Jacob looked down at me and smiled before he once again moved in to kiss my lips. For some reason the soft kisses led me to believe he actually halfway gave a damn about me… For tonight this would be enough, tonight would be enough to last me a life time. I let my hands move up slowly underneath his shirt putting to memory the feel of his strong as he shivered underneath my touch. I smiled as he shivered, he placed one hand on the back of my head holding my face still as the other moved down to cup my bottom. Leaning in more he nipped the bottom of lip asking for permission, which I readily gave him. Our tounges wrestled as we made our way to me awaiting bed. Jacob smiled breaking the kiss he stepped back pulling my shirt up and over my head, looking down at my body he leaned in kissing on my neck.

"Your so beautiful Amelia…" Jacob whispered softly as he leaned down kissing softly against my neck, I felt my breath stop as he kissed the tender skin. It seemed like he knew just what I wanted and needed not having to say a thing to him. I reached over pulling at his shirt, he lifted his arms as I threw the offending shirt to the side, stepping forward I placed a kiss on his chest right above his heart. Jacob let out a soft moan as he wrapped me in his arms my arms mimicking his actions just wanting to be close to him. He held me for a few minutes before bending down to pick me up bridal style he gently placed me on the bed following me down, that smile on his lips as he started kissing my lips then down my nack and onto my chest reaching his hands around he undid my bra sliding it down my arms. I shivered at the night air causing Jacob to laugh softly as he leaned closer placing his big hands on my breasts.

"Better?" He asked his voice a little more husky as I nodded, moving one of his hands out of the way he leaned down kissing on my breasts before taking the nipple in his mouth giving it a soft nip causing my to moan. I felt him start to suck on my nipple as his other hand started to massage my other breast, my hand moved up to hold his head in place. A few minutes later he switched to my other breast paying it the same attention. My free hand rubbing the soft skin of his back. I leaned down kissing the top of his head. A few minutes later he started kissing down my stomach as he worked on the buttons of my pants, he quickly got them undone and off my legs my underwear soon followed. Moving to the side he smiled looking at my naked body I couldn't help but blush under his gaze, I felt shy when he did that… Jacob bit his bottom lip as he moved over to nuzzle my neck his hand moving down to rub the mound in between my thighs causing me to jump and let out a soft moan he smiled against my skin before pulling back and undressing.

I pulled him back down onto the bed not wanting him to be away from me, he placed a hand on my cheek as he positioned himself over me keeping all his weight on his free arm as he slowly pushed inside of me…. That was it I was done for.

I shook my head at the memory a tear sliding from my eye, he had been so gentle that night, I could of swore I saw something more than lust in his eyes as he moved inside of me. I licked my lips before cuddling down into the couch staring blankly outside of my window. That was 6 weeks ago, now the only time I saw Jacob was when he was in his wolf form, he would come to the back of the house and sit watching me… or watching the house when I was at work. I he was using me that night but I had let him… as much as I hated to admit it I wanted it… I needed it. I sighed as I felt my phone vibrating once again. I looked down to see Jacob's number chewing on my lip I answered it.

"Hello?"

"Amelia, why haven't you answered my damned calls? I was starting to worry."

"I had it on vibrate." I said numbly looking out the window at the woods.

"Here's an idea…. Take it off vibrate." I shrugged forgetting he was on the phone for a minute.

"I figure if its important someone will get in touch with me some way. What do you need Jacob?"

There was a silence for a minute as I heard him sigh.

"I needed to hear your voice." I smiled for a minute feeling that subtle pain starting to fade in my stomach, knowing he was slowly starting to feel better too. I sighed looking back to the ceiling above the couch.

"Feeling better?" I asked imagining what he was doing, would he be in the kitchen sitting at the table his hand holding his head or would he be laying on his too small bed, his arm tossed over his eyes…. I smiled at the thought before shaking it out of my mind.

"A little… I need to see you." I knew the pull was starting to become painful, I felt it too but I was strong damn it. I didn't need Jacob, I let myself take in the pain preparing myself for when I would leave. I had been putting him off for 2 weeks.

"I'll be at Sam and Ems' for dinner tonight." I heard something that sounded like a relieved sigh from Jacob's end of the phone. "I'll see you later." I said hanging up the phone before standing up moving to my bedroom upstairs I pulled out a pair of nice but comfy jeans and a purple t-shirt it would be warm at Emily's. I started getting ready I didn't want to look overly done up but I wanted to look nice.

A little over an hour later I pulled up at Emily's shutting off the car and getting out. I looked at the house and smiled hearing "Hey! Ami's here" and "Hell yes! It's about time" I loved my boys… they were great. Shutting the door I walked toward house only to practically be mauled as Seth and Embry rushed forward grabbing me into tight…somewhat painful… bear hugs I smiled trying to pat their backs while still breathing.

"Alright guys don't break her!" I heard Sam's voice laugh a little as they released me, I saw a flash of black hair bolt toward me before throwing herself in my arms I somewhat lost some balance as I caught my sister. I laughed as Seth steadied us.

"Easy Ems… I missed you too" I said giving her a big squeeze as I kissed the side of her hair. Emily smiled before throwing herself into a speech about not staying away for so long.

"I have to work Emily…" I said walking into the kitchen she looked at me pointing her wooden spoon at me.

"You shouldn't be working at the hospital tall blonde and creepy works there." She said crossing her arms over her chest. I couldn't help but chuckle.

"I am aware of that, but they pay good and I have to have a job so there." I stuck my tounge out at her picking up an apple. Just then I looked over my shoulder my eyes locking with Jacob's as he stood there watching me. I turned away from him biting into my apple, can you say awkward? I helped Emily with supper feeling Jacob's eyes watching me the entire time. It was nice to be back here, I felt so at home, it was nice. I looked up watching as Seth and Brady wrestled on the floor. I missed this… a lot but I would get over it. I was an independent woman, I didn't need a man and I damn sure didn't need Jacob Black… Jacob Black, the man who made my heart to flips at the mention of his name, the one who haunted my dreams and the one who hated me… yep the life of this imprint was freaking amazing! As I was kneading the bread I heard the door bang open before I was picked up and spun around flour flying everywhere as I let out a little squeak. Looking up I saw Quil's laughing eyes as Paul stood to the side smirking at me.

"Well hey there Teddy, glad to see you decided to grace us with your presence." Paul said as Quil sat me down walking over I patted Paul's cheek with my flour covered hand.

"What can I say? I knew ya'll would be missing me something terrible so I figured why not?" I saw Jacob watching us as I stepped back, Paul just smirked reaching a hand up to wipe off some of the flour.

"If you didn't look so damn adorable I would throw you outside." He said laughing as Quil reached over wiping some flour off my face.

"I think she has flour on every surface in the kitchen." Quil said with a chuckle, Emily smiled looking at the two of them.

"It's a process she has…don't doubt it her bread is amazing." I smiled a triumphant smile as I went back to kneading the bread, humming to myself. I relaxed as I let my guard down just a little enjoying being back and it seemed like everyone was glad I was from the way everyone was asking questions and giving me hugs, well everyone except Jacob he just sat there quietly watching me letting out a soft growl when one of the guys held me too long or when Paul got to close to me.

Sitting down at the table Emily, Kim and I got our food we had barely got out of firing range when the guys jumped in grabbing their food. I smiled watching them, Paul was sitting across from me, I was currently squashed between Jacob and Embry. Picking up my fork I started to eat my chicken Emily sat there talking to me about work acting interested when I knew all she wanted to know is if I had any run ins with 'tall pale and creepy' as she referred to Cullen earlier. I looked at my sister who sat proudly beside Sam. I looked her in the eye and smiled.

"Sissy, I have been at the hospital for three months… this morning was the first and only time I ever saw him. I work the night shift… he's not around then so please stop worrying so much… it'll give you wrinkles." Emily's frown just deepened as I sat back in seat, Jacob looked at me arching a brow.

"Did he touch you?" He asked… more like growled out… as he turned to look at me, I shook my head no rolling my eyes. The pack really didn't seem to trust me all that much. I sighed taking another bite of supper effectively ending the conversation… for now anyways. We sat around the table talking as we ate, I smiled listening to Seth describe a fish he had caught, of course I had a feeling he was exaggerating a little bit… but I didn't say anything let the kid have his fun. As the guys finished their food, I stood up grabbing plates off the table trying to keep busy as I reached for Jacob's plate he sat there staring at me, watching my every move I arched a brow as I grabbed his plate before turning around on my heel walking toward the sink. This man confused the crap out of me… I never knew what he was thinking. I ushered everyone out of the kitchen, Emily included, I didn't mind cleaning up it gave me something to do with my hands and keeps my mind from wondering too much. As I filled the sink up I sighed leaning against it looking out the window my mind flashed back to the last night I spent with Jacob, I hated how that night kept playing in my mind over and over again… I hated how much he meant to me. I knew Jacob was the man that I would always love, I knew that even though he seemed to hate me there was a part of him that cared for me. I looked over to the door feeling that I was being watched, Jacob stood there watching me. I shook me head a minute before looking back over to the sink sticking my hands down into the soapy water.

"What do you need?" I tried to act like he didn't bother me, like I didn't care he was moving across the kitchen and didn't mind that he was standing behind me his arms wrapped around my waist as he rested his chin on my shoulder. He stood there holding my back against his chest as he used my shoulder as a chin rest, to me this felt so right… so natural but for him the part of him that he wolf tried to control was telling him he needed to be close to his 'imprint' just for a little while. I stood there letting him hold me as I washed dishes, he didn't speak he just held me close to his chest, whenever I would move to turn on the water or put the dishes in the drainer he would pull me farther into him acting like he was afraid I would try to break out of his hold. I didn't say anything, instead I finished with the dishes before looking at him.

"You can let me go now Jacob."

"No… that's where your wrong Ami, I can never let you go… no matter how much either of us wants it. I'm bound to you, and you to me there's no use in fighting it." Jacob said a sound of loathing in his voice before turning away from me and walking out of the kitchen and out the front door. I stood there confused, he obviously didn't like being 'bound to me'… well I didn't like it either. I didn't ask for this damn it! I didn't ask for some hot headed, ill tempered, ass of a wolf. After I had cleaned up the kitchen I walked into the living room attempting to say my good byes to everyone but in the end I got suckered into watching the entire Saw collections… have I mentioned before I hate scary movies? I am terrified of them… well anyways that seemed to be lost on my guys as I sat there in between Paul and Embry closing my eyes at the gruesome/scary parts and hiding behind my blanket I had stolen from Ems. By the end of the second movie I had the blanket over my head, hands over my ears trying to find my 'happy place' as I heard the guys laughing and saying things like "oh how cool" and 'man did you see that!' I just there wishing for this torture to be over with!

As the third movie started up I felt someone grab my waist I jumped up off the couch, blanket still covering my head, I let out a ear piercing scream before tripping over something and falling to the floor with a thud. I heard the guys laughing as I tried to get the offending blanket off my head, a minute later the door slammed open causing me to jump even more as finally the blanket fell off and onto my lap. A heavy breathing… and completely naked… Jacob stood at the door looking around the room before spotting me, he rushed over grabbing my arms pulling me up off the floor taking care not to hurt me.

"Are you alright? What's wrong?" He asked looking me over I swallowed hard trying to keep my eyes on his trying to tell myself he wasn't naked… I started to speak but nothing came out, he gave me a gentle shake telling me to talk as I licked my lips and nodded.

"I… I ugh… nothing. Just watching a scary movie…" I said blushing looking down at my feet and instantly wishing I hadn't done that once I got a view of his… well you know. I blushed even darker and turned my head, Paul sat there grinning like an idiot well that was until Jacob turned on him looking furious.

"Paul! What the hell you know Amelia doesn't watch scary movies! Are you trying to scare her to death or are you just an idiot?" I glanced over to Emily and Sam who had a little smirk on their faces apparently thinking that Jacob was starting to change, starting to accept the imprint, I knew he wasn't I knew he was drawn back here to me feeling the need to protect me. When he heard me scream he automatically thought something was wrong and the need to protect me flared up.. That's it nothing more. Reaching up I placed a small hand on Jacob's bicep.

"Jacob…" I spoke softly, he looked down at me looking me over making sure I was alright he nodded before turning and walking out the door cussing as he went. I sighed before grabbing my jacket and keys.

"I'm heading home… I have to do some stuff around the house." A lame excuse, I knew it but hell I couldn't stay here any longer. I was starting to fall back into my old way of thinking, hoping that if I held on long and hard enough Jacob would start to love me, he would forget Bella and would remember I was the one he was suppose to be with, I started to feel at home back at Ems, like I never wanted to leave. I had to get out of there before this wall I was working on building up came crashing down. I had to leave while I had the strength to do it.

I ignored the pleas for me to stay as I told them all good bye, opened up the door and walked out. I am a strong, independent woman. I am Amelia Young, I do not need a man to make me happy and I damn sure don't need Jacob Ephraim Black! Screw this imprint bull shit, screw love, forget Isabella Swan, the Cullens and the whole damned she-bang. I am done.

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