A/N: Because I'm nice (and impatient) here's the next chapter early.
'Well no one told me about her
What could I do?
Well no one told me about her
Though they all knew
...
Well let me tell you about the way she looked,
The way she'd act, the color of her hair
Her voice was soft and cool
Her eyes were clear and bright
But she's not there'
-The Zombies, She's not there
Chapter 2: Scar meets Fracture
From the mind of the patient in room 97
Days pass and I hear nothing about the new patient. I wonder if they really had sent her to solitary confinement. When I think of the idea I inwardly cringe. The screamer has been on my mind non stop. I attack Maka and Tsubaki with questions about her but the their answers are always the same.
"I don't know."
It infuriates me. They HAVE to know.
I count my fingers at rapid speed in the dinning hall when the patient Soul Evans speaks up.
"They're letting her out today." Is what he says.
I look up from my hands and shoot him a confused look. I know exactly who he's talking about, I just don't know how he obtained this information.
"How do you know?" I ask.
Soul rests his head in his hands and shrugs.
"I know things." He says smugly.
While Soul was probably the closest thing I had to a friend "here", he knew precisely how to piss me off and was very talented at doing so.
"How?" I repeat.
He smirks and flashes me a toothy grin.
"If you want to know about the new girl then I want something in return."
Soul Evans has been in this hospital for ages. I think he first arrived here when he was just a boy, he may even grew up here. The other patients sometimes joke and call him the "veteran" but he just scoffs and says:
"You're here too. You're just as batshit crazy as I am."
One thing about Soul's familiarity with the asylum is that he knows all the ropes. He knows all the staff and secrets and he knows damn well how to get what he wants. He uses his knowledge as a bargaining tool. If you want to know something you have to pay Soul before he tells you a word.
I groan. "What do you want?"
"The rest of your lunch and get Tsubaki to do my laundry for a week."
"I don't own Tsubaki. Ask her yourself. You can have my lunch though." I push the tray towards him. I wasn't planning on eating it anyway.
"Cool." He says before devouring my food.
I grimace and turn away from the sight. I can hear him chewing and slurping and crunching and it makes me sick. The sounds grow louder in my head and my hands begin to shake.
"P-please Soul. Close your mouth." I mutter.
He raises an eyebrow but nods and the noises go away. I let out a deep breath and my hands calm down.
"What do you know about her?" I ask.
He swallows my food and starts to ramble about all he knows.
"Maka says she's been in her room for the past four days, not because she's forced too though. Apparently she's been asleep."
"For four days?"
"Mm. She woke up this morning but she hasn't left her bed. Maka said something about that she's in this kind of daze where she can't react the people around her."
'Non responsive to human contact.'
"What else?"
Soul taps his chin and narrows his eyes as his trying to remember something important.
"Her name is Crona."
Crona.
The name means dark one.
After lunch Soul and I are walking to group therapy. Soul keeps ranting about how Maka's been practically forcing medication down his throat. He hates medication. Soul is convinced that the pills are filled with nano bots. A typical symptom of his paranoid schizophrenia. Maka is Soul's personal nurse so it's her job to make sure Soul takes his meds. Usually she is forced to bargain with him. Funny, they're very similar with the way they get what they want.
They're very similar in many ways actually. They're both stubborn, bold, fearless.
Like wild horses.
Except, one of these horses is bound. Soul may strut around, thinking he owns this place, but it's all too clear that he's trapped just like the rest of us.
Why do I feel pity for him? I'm exactly where he is. How is his situation any different?
"Kid." He says.
I snap out of my daze and turn to face him. He's giving me that look again. The one he gives me when I'm counting my fingers or when I'm arranging the condiments in reverse alphabetical order in the dinning hall.
"Sorry.." I mutter. "Just a little out of it."
"You've been spacing out a lot for the past few days." He says.
I just nod. I don't bother to give him an explanation because, to be honest, I don't have one.
I don't know.
Suddenly I'm scared. Why am I so distant lately? There's no reason. But there must be a reason. There is a logical reason for everything on this planet. There is a reason why the blinds must be open and shut 8 times, there is a reason why my hair is colored this way, there is a reason why the screamer was brought here.
I just don't know the reason.
Why don't I know?
I don't realize I'm shaking until Soul is holding onto my shoulders and telling me to breath. Breath! How am I supposed to breath when I can't tell him why I don't remember what I ate for breakfast or what the last 17 sentences of our conversation was about. I don't know anything!
"Kid, calm down. Look we're almost to group okay? Stop biting your nails, it's not cool. Kid? Kid talk to me."
But I can't talk to him because the ringing in my ears are getting louder and there is screaming in my head. Something awful is going to happen I just know it. I can't breath. I can't breath at all. I'm shaking more and I think my lips are moving but I can't tell if I'm talking. Soul is talking but I can't hear him.
I need to get out.
My feet are moving without my permission again. Am I running away?
Why don't I know?
I can hear Soul calling after me but his voice is getting softer and farther away.
Why?
My head is facing the floor, my arms are wrapped around my stomach. I feel sick.
WHY?
I throw open a door and fall to my knees. The floor is cold and so is the air. I cough and dry heave but nothing comes out.
I remember that I gave Soul my lunch so my stomach is empty. Did I eat breakfast? I don't remember.
WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY?
There is no time to count my fingers or click my tongue or close the blinds. I'm dying, I'm sure of it. I'm on my hands and knees, tears fall from my eyes and saliva drips from my lips into a tiny puddle bellow.
Footsteps. Where did those come from? Soul? Tsubaki?...Father?
My vision is blurry but I'm able to make out two dusty black boots stand in front of me. No shoes I've ever seen before. The patients are required to wear just simple slip on vans because we are not allowed to have laces. The doctors and nurses always wear sneakers. When you work in a place like this, you better be prepared to run when you need to.
My head tilts up so I can see the figure.
Tall, very tall, especially at my angle. The figure towers over me.
Long black dress. The darkness almost hurts my eyes. I'm so used to the bright whiteness of the sanatorium. I don't think I've seen something this dark for ages.
It's hair is a pink color, a choppy mop and sticking out all over the place. It has bangs that hide it's eyes.
Pale knuckles of it's left hand holds on tight to it's right arm.
The person has a very dark atmosphere around them. I feel a certain sadness in my soul and I can't tell why.
Who are you?
I finally get feeling back in my body and push myself off the concrete floor. I stand up to get a better look at the body in front of me. It doesn't move an inch. I back away a bit and notice that this person was a female. She watches me move, a curious look in her eyes.
Her eyes.
Her eyes were dark like her dress. Her pale skin makes them all the more noticeable. They are like the eyes of a fawn. Wide open, timid, alert, dark. I'm afraid if I make any more sudden movements she might flee like a startled deer. She doesn't though. She actually comes closer. I don't dare move. I don't know if this girl is a friend or foe. You learn here that there are many dangerous patients and you should keep your distance from the people you aren't familiar with.
She takes another step closer, her facial expression shows no emotion. I can't tell what she's thinking. She's about a foot away from me now. My body is refusing to move. She raises her hand slowly, bringing it to my face. Her finger tips are grazing my cheek and there's this sad look in her eyes. Like she's disappointed, or she's lost hope. I can't pull away. Her lips part as if she's about to tell me something. I notice I can breath again and I can move, but...I don't want to.
Who are you?
"Crona!"
Suddenly Maka is dashing over to us.
The girl's hand freezes and she quickly pulls away, as if horrified by her own actions. Her eyes seem to change color from the dark blue to silver.
Crona? Is that who you are? The screamer?
She backs away from me and Maka comes closer. Crona whips her head around to see the nurse and she looks scared. Her eyes dart back and forth from me to Maka and she begins to whimper. She sits down on the floor and hugs her knees tight to her chest, then she hides her head. The action reminds me of a turtle.
"Crona I've been looking everywhere for you!" Maka says. She crouches down next to the turtle and puts a hand on her shoulder. The girl in the black dress flinches at the touch and Maka pulls her hand away. She looks shocked.
"Crona? Are you okay?"
Crona doesn't answer, I think she's trying to pretend she's invisible.
The nurse then looks up at me. "What did you do?" She demands.
I'm appalled by her accusatory tone. "Nothing! I didn't do anything."
She glares at me. "She was talking to you wasn't she? What did you tell her?"
"I didn't tell her anything! And we were not talking. She just walked up to me but she didn't say anything."
Maka's expression softened a bit. Then it turned to something of surprise. She looked back at Crona.
"She walked up to you?"
"Yes! That's all that happened."
"Did she look at you? Like, not in your direction, but actually at your face?"
"Yes! Why is that so hard to believe?"
Then I remember: 'Non responsive to human contact.' Crona can't acknowledge anyone. She can't see anyone, except she saw me. Not only did she see me, but she reached out for me. She tried to communicate.
She saw me.
I look at the pink haired girl. She is still curled up, eyes squeezed shut. And I wonder if she is trying to forget what she saw.
'Please don't bother trying to find her
She's not there'
Preview of the next chapter:
"Her hand reaches out for my own but it stops for a moment in mid air, she's rethinking her decision to trust me. I feel a certain pain in my chest when I think that she won't give me a chance. I hope that she at least tries to let me in. I don't know why Crona doesn't respond to people, but something tells me it's because she doesn't think she can trust them. I can understand that. I know what it's like to give someone your life and watch them throw it away carelessly.
I understand that."
