Mail Order Bride
A/N WOWWIE! 17 reviews for the last chapter! That's the most I've gotten out of 1 chapter so far. That is totally awesome. You are all the best! So, here is part 1 of the Wedding day for all of you. I know, I said the wedding was this chapter, but some other things had to be covered first. Hope you all enjoy it! Don't forget to review and show me the love!
Disclaimer: I really am lazy about this. Don't own anything but the storyline. Twilight characters belong to Stephanie Meyer. I just like to play with them!
Chapter 15
The morning of her wedding, Bella awoke with a vast fear of the unknown. When she had been a little girl, imagining her wedding day, this was certainly not how she had pictured it. Marrying a man, who had bluntly told her, that this would be a loveless, childless marriage. Her husband to be obviously still very much in love with his late wife, the mother of his daughter. The man who only a short, pair of weeks prior, had kissed her breathless in his parents Dining room, drawing forth feelings that had startled her in their intensity…
In short, Bella was miserable.
A light rapping began on the door. Sitting up in bed, Bella quietly called out, "Who is it?"
"It's Esme, dear. May I come in?"
Bella sighed. Esme had been such a wonderful distraction to Bella during all of this. She and Alice had both helped Bella pick out new dresses and other items. Edward had insisted that Bella buy a new wardrobe, at his expense. Bella had balked at first, not wanting to touch any of his money, for any reason. Esme had sat her down, and explained that not all the dresses she currently owned would be appropriate for Chicago's weather. Edward was simply looking out for her welfare. Bella had reluctantly accepted.
Then, the tug of war began. Alice couldn't seem to understand that Bella had very simple taste. She didn't like a lot of frills and flounces. Every time Bella had looked at a simply designed dress, Alice had cringed visibly and tried to steer her in the direction of something more feminine. This, in turn, caused Bella to shudder.
Finally, Bella had asked if Esme would be willing to accompany them, as well. Esme readily agreed, and Bella was finally able to buy the items that she wanted. To appease Alice, Bella also bought a couple of dresses that were more appropriate to a fancy party or outing. This made Alice extremely happy, and Bella realized that compromise was the best way to get through to Alice.
In the end, Bella had acquired several new dresses, as well as shoes and new undergarments. As an early wedding gift, Esme had bought her a beautiful nightgown. It was white, with sheer arms. Small blue ribbons surrounded the bust line. Bella thought it was the most beautiful nightgown she had ever owned.
Coming back to the present, Bella replied, "Yes, Esme. You can come in."
Esme glided into the room, closing the door behind her softly. Spying Bella still abed, she gasped quietly. "Oh! I'm so sorry, dear. Did I wake you?"
Bella couldn't help smiling at this wonderful woman. "No, you didn't. I was just…thinking."
"May I sit down? I would like to talk to you, if that's alright?" Esme asked, standing near the bed. At Bella's nodding ascent, Esme took a seat near Bella.
"Bella, sweetheart. I'm terribly sorry to ask this, but, may I inquire as to how old you were when you lost your mother?" Esme asked.
Bella thought it an odd question, but answered her regardless. "I was four when my mother passed away."
"And, you have no elder sisters, correct?"
"No, I have three brothers."
Esme's face took on a thoughtful expression. "So, you've never really had a strong, female influence in your life?"
Bella stared at Esme, wondering exactly where this conversation was heading. Esme stared at Bella, trying to figure out exactly how to say what she needed to say. Finally, Esme sighed and said, "Bella, I would like to talk to you about your wedding night."
Bella blushed. Should she tell her that there wouldn't be a wedding night? How could she tell this wonderful woman her son had no intention of making her a real wife. Even though she had been the one to tell him the consummation of the marriage wasn't necessary, Bella had been hurt by how readily Edward had agreed to her terms. Half heartedly, she had hoped that Edward might someday grow to love her. When he agreed to the "business" marriage only, Bella had grudgingly accepted that hers would not be a loving, happy marriage.
Oh, she knew that Edward would never treat her badly. She also knew that, even though she hadn't given birth to her, she would, at least be a mother to little Nessie. Unfortunately, she also wanted to be Edward's wife, in every way.
For the hundredth time since coming to Chicago, Bella wondered if she was making the absolute, right choice. She had left home because she wanted a better life than she had been living. In actuality, even though she would be Edward's wife, her life wouldn't be much better than the one she had left behind. She would still be taking care of a home, and cooking and cleaning. She was basically exchanging one "prison" for another.
Bella finally realized that Esme was still talking to her. Having not been paying attention, she was shocked to see Esme looking at her.
"So, do you have any questions, dear? Anything you would like to ask me?" Esme said.
"Oh, uh…no. Thank you for explaining all of that. It helped a lot," Bella said, lying through her teeth. She hadn't heard one word that Esme had said to her. Not that it mattered much. It wasn't like she would ever get to use the knowledge that Esme had imparted on her. A distant part of her brain told her that Nessie would someday need that information though. Bella only hoped Esme would still be around when that time came. Bella knew she'd never be able to use her experience to help Nessie.
Getting up from the bed, Esme reached down and hugged Bella. "Welcome to the family, dear. I hope that you and Edward will be as happy in your lives together as Carlisle and myself have been." With those parting words, Esme opened the door and walked out.
Bella stifled a sob in her hand. How she hated deceiving a beautiful soul like Esme. The irony of the situation finally hit Bella. She would never have the kind of marriage that Esme had. She would never have the kind of marriage any woman had.
How would Edward explain it, when asked about children? Would he say that we were waiting for a better time? Would he say anything at all? Or, maybe he would say that we were content with Nessie, and didn't want any more children. That thought broke Bella's heart even more. She would never have her own child. One she could nurture and love. One that was hers.
In that moment, Bella realized she had made the wrong choice. She couldn't marry Edward. She couldn't subject herself to a loveless marriage. The only reason she had agreed to stay, was because of Nessie. As much as she didn't want to hurt that sweet, innocent child, Bella knew that she couldn't go through with the marriage. She needed love.
She needed Edward to love her….
Without love, she knew she wouldn't survive a marriage to him.
Downstairs, Edward was pacing. The wedding was set to start in 2 hours. His mother and sister had been busy decorating the parlor, which was where the wedding would take place. Earlier, Esme had gone up to see how Bella was doing. Edward wanted to talk to Bella, as well. However, when he had tried, Alice had blocked his path, telling him it was bad luck to see the bride before the wedding. In a way, it was actually comical. Alice, the little pixie, blocking the path of Edward, who stood at least a foot and a half taller.
When Esme finally came back downstairs, she had a worried expression on her face. Edward instantly went on alert. He hurried to her side.
"Mother? Is everything all right?" Edward asked, fear creeping into his voice.
"I just came from Bella's room. I shouldn't tell you this, but after I left her room, I heard her start crying. It broke my heart. I'm worried," Esme told her son.
"Worried? About what?"
"I didn't want to say anything, but, I heard you two talking that night. You know, the one where Nessie "interrupted" you. I heard about your "agreement." I know you have no plans to make her your wife," Esme said, stressing "wife."
Edward jerked his hands through his hair. Fuck! He hadn't realized his mother had eavesdropped. No wonder she kept looking at him and shaking her head slightly. It all made sense now.
"Mother, why are you telling me this?" Edward had to know.
"I went up to speak to Bella about her "wedding night." I wanted her to know what to expect. Edward, I know for a fact, she didn't hear a word I said. Her face held the same blank look, the whole time I was explaining things to her. One would think, that this was information that she would need, unless she knew she never would." Esme gave her son a hard stare.
"Mother, come on. I don't even know her that well. You can't expect me to…" Edward started, but was interrupted by Esme.
"You know her well enough to "play games" with her in my Dining room. I'm neither stupid, nor that old. I know exactly what was going on in there. What I want to know is, are you going to make her your wife, in every way, or are you going to lead her on, and ultimately break her heart?"
"How can I break her heart? We just met."
Esme shook her head, amazed at her son's utter stupidity. Bella was already falling in love with Edward, and unless she missed her guess, Edward was having similar feelings toward Bella. She also knew how stubborn her son could be. He would hide behind "his love for Tanya" for the rest of his life, if it were up to him.
Esme had always liked her daughter-in-law, no question there. It had broken her heart when Tanya had gotten sick and passed away, leaving Edward and Nessie alone. She had hoped that someday, Edward would find someone to love again. She was very certain that person was Bella.
Now, to convince her son…..
A/N I know, I know. I'm evil and mean. Will they or won't they? Does she stay or go? So many questions. I promise, the next chapter will answer them all. Review, please! They make me happy!