Author's Note: This chapter will be the last of the cannon oriented chapters. It's a little long, but I didn't want to separate it into two. If you enjoy this chapter, I hope you'll stick around for the third, where Amell makes his long awaited appearance Reviews are loved and appreciated.
Prelude- Chapter 2- Shatterglass
When Ishafel surged back from the darkness, she did not know where she was. The familiar scent of hide and grass surrounded her. She was in her own tent? Impossible. Had it all been a dream? She moved to sit up and at once felt violently ill. A fever dream? Had she been ill? Forcing herself to stand, She exited the tent quickly, intending to find Tamlen at once. It was Fenarel who first noticed her. She experience a sinking sensation in her stomach at the relief on his face.
It had not been a dream.
"You're awake! You have the gods own luck, lethallan. Everyone has been worried sick about you. How do you feel?"
The tenderness in his expression made her think that she had been very ill indeed. Fenarel had always been very easy to read, and he seem shocked to see her up and about. Troublesome.
"Worried. Where is Tamlen?"
His face grew dark. "We don't know. The shem who brought you here saw no sign of him."
Ishafel shook her head once, twice, trying to bring all that had happened after Tamlen touched the mirror into clarity, but there was nothing there.
"I don't remember anything." She seethed in frustration. "I was in a cave, then... nothing!"
"A grey warden appeared out of nowhere with you slung over his shoulder. You were delirious with fever. He said he found you outside a cave in the forest, unconscious and alone. He left you here and ran off again. The keeper has been using the old magic to heal you."
Even more troublesome.
"I need to talk to the keeper right away."
Fenarel nodded. "She wants to talk to you too."
He was quick to return with the keeper. Her face was not at all calming. In fact, Ishafel grew even more worried.
"I see you are awake, Da'len. It is fortunate Duncan found you when he did. I do not know what dark power held you, but it nearly bled the life from you. It was difficult for even my magic to keep you alive."
Ah, So she had been close to death; very, very close. She should probably still be resting, but she was not thinking of her own well being at the moment.
"Then Tamlen could be sick as well?"
The keeper's eyes betrayed the fear that her impassive voice did not.
"If he encountered the same thing you did, yes. The Grey Warden said he found you outside a cave already stricken. Da'len, Duncan thought there may have been darkspawn creatures inside the cave. Is that true?"
Ishafel shrugged "All I remember was a mirror..."
"A mirror? And it caused all this? I have never heard of such a thing in all the lore we have collected."
She sighed heavily and then began to pace. It was something she did only when very disturbed.
"I was hoping for answers when you woke, but there are only more questions." She paused, considering, and then "Do you feel well enough to show us the way? Da'len? Without you we will not find it."
She needed no time to consider. Tamlen could be dying.
"I am up to it, Keeper, I feel fine."
"I am relieved to here it. I am ordering the clan to pack up camp and go north. Take Merrill with you to the cave, Find Tamlen if you can, but do do swiftly."
"The clan is leaving? So soon?"
They had only just arrived a week ago.
"If there is any truth to what Duncan said, then darkspawn are coming, we need to stay ahead of the horde. But that is not our only concern." She suddenly gave Ishafel critical look. "Did you encounter any humans in our forest?"
"Three of them. Ishafel said brusquely "We killed one as an example."
Marethari shook her head in disapproval. "So I feared. You have stirred up a hornet's nest, da'len. Their
village blames us for your actions. As everywhere, our people are not welcome here. We must move on- quickly."
"But are you not interested in the ruins and the mirror?"
"I would be lying if I said I was not. But whatever knowledge lies in that cave is not worth our children. I send you back with hopes of finding Tamlen, That is all."
Ishafel thought on those words. She was right of course, she should have convinced Tamlen to leave the cave sooner. This- this was all her fault. The impact of the guilt was almost strong enough to send her stumbling. The keeper, thinking no doubt that the lost of balance was due to her sickness, reached out to her.
"Go quickly, for Tamlen's life hangs in the balance."
Ishafel did not waste anytime finding Merrill, and together with Fenarel, who had appealed to the keeper to come as well, they made a swift trek back to the clearing where she had killed the shem. Moving almost too fast for the other to to keep up, Ishafel was halfway down the broken land when she heard Merrill shriek.
"What is that!"
Several feet from Ishafel, a shadowed and twisted shem burst out of the ground. She took a step back as two more launched up from the revine. Fenarel's arrows knocked back the closest of the creatures and Ishafel let her Dar'misu take care of the rest. After the last one was slain, Merrill (who despite having done very little to help) stood panting for breath, horror on her face.
"What were those things? Were those darkspawn?"
Ishafel wiped the blackish blood off on the blade onto the grass. Strength left her knees and she sat for a moment on the grass.
"It would make sense." She said absentmindedly, in actuality it did not make sense to her at all. There had been nothing of the sort outside the cave when they had stumbled across it.
Merrill continued to prattle on.
"I've never seen anything like them! You can smell the evil on them! Where did they come from? Were they here before?"
"Maybe that mirror has something to do with it," Ishafel motioned to the two of them to follow as she continued down the broken ridge toward the cave. As before, the forest sounds stopped abruptly. A few moments more and they reached the bramble snarls over the mouth of the cave. Treading carefully, Ishafel took point, with Fenarel and Merrill close behind.
The cave was eerily quiet. Like Tamlen before them, the newest visitors were blown away by the hidden ruins.
"This- This is amazing!" Merrill whispered, "I had no idea human and elven architecture had been combined like this" her enthusiasm tempered quickly. "but... there is something wrong about this place isn't there?" It feels like its been tainted..." she shivered.
Ishafel had no time for musings, she just wanted to bring Tamlen home. The creatures had found their way to the cave as well. They found the first bodies a few rooms in, but they were not all dead. After making quick work of the supposed darkspawn, Ishafel found herself once again at the cave with the mirror. Running to the door, she flung it open in a burst of strength. In hindsight, she had not known what she thought would find there. Tamlen, maybe lying there sick, or perhaps totally healthy making this some sort of bazaar joke. Instead, amid a pile of dead darkspawn, she found a shem looking at the mirror. The mirror's glass had gone from a high polish to a sickly array of color. She heard a gasp from her right, Merrill no doubt, and he turned around. The man was well dressed for a shem, and well armed to boot. He surveyed all three of them with a look that was not quite neutral, but Ishafel had know idea what the expression could mean.
"So you were the ones fighting the darkspawn? I thought I heard combat."
"If you hear the fighting, why didn't you help?" Ishafel muttered under her breath. The shem actually had the gall to smile at that. "I would have had I not have been battling them myself. Not all the kills here were yours" he gestured to the ring of dead creatures surrounding him. "as you can see."
Ishafel continued to glower at him, she'd rather hurry up any conversation he thought they should have and find Tamlen instead. He turned to Ishafel in recognition.
"My name is Duncan, and it's a pleasure to finally meet you. The last time we spoke, you were barely conscious."
She nodded. "Andaran atish'an, I am Ishafel. This is Merrill, the keeper's apprentice and Fenarel, one of our hunters."
"Your keeper did not send you after me, did she? I told her I would been in no danger."
"We are looking for our brother, Tamlen" Merrill explained. It was clear she had jumped in before Ishafel lost her temper and said something along the lines of "why would we look for a shem?" Her agitation was clearly showing.
But Duncan seemed fixed on Ishafel. He addressed her again. "So you and your friend entered this cave and saw this mirror?"
"Yes, but it wasn't doing anything like that when we found it."
By like that, she was referring to the red lightening that had begun to jump off the surface of the mirror and lick up the white marble sides.
"There was a monstrous bear guarding it," she described the appearance of the creature briefly to Duncan, "Was that bear a darkspawn?" she asked, her curiosity overcoming her annoyance for a moment.
"Perhaps, the mirror draws darkspawn to it. The Grey Wardens have seen artifacts like this mirror before, it is Tiventer in origin, used for communication. Over time some simply...break. They become filled with the same taint as the darkspawn. Tamlen's touch must of released it... It's what made you sick, and Tamlen too, I presume."
"Can we fix it?" Merrill interjected. She made a move to approach the mirror but Duncan firmly stopped her; grabbing her arm and holding her in place when she tried to pass him.
"Unfortunately, no. It will taint all those who come near it now.
Merrill stubbornly set her jaw. "I do not fear this sickness. The keeper knows how to cure it."
Duncan held her arm more forcefully. "She may have weakened it. But she cannot cure it."
Looking to Ishafel he said quietly, "your recovery is only temporary. I can sense the sickness in you, and it is spreading. Look inside yourself and you will see."
She didn't need to look, she could already feel her health being sapped away. How many times on the walk down had Fenarel said she looked too white? Or Merrill abruptly suggest that they should rest?
She knew something was wrong.
"What would you have me do?" She asked, wondering if that shadow that she had felt when she and Tamlen had first come here was now the taint inside her. If so, she had only just survived with considerable help. They must locate Tamlen as soon as possible. This cave, just being in it was unhealthy.
Duncan gave her a long, considering look. "First, We deal with the mirror, it is a pestilence and a threat."
Without further ado he took the hilt of his sword and slammed it down on the mirror glass. There was a large, unnatural crack that sounded in the normal chiming sound of shattering glass.
"Now, let us leave this cursed place. I must speak with the keeper immediately regarding your cure."
"I can't believe you just did that!" Ishafel started forward, snarling. "That was our only clue to Tamlen's whereabouts! What if it lead to a different part of the cave? He could be sick, dying. We have to find him!"
Duncan face only showed strain and sorrow. "There is nothing we can do."
No. No. She refused to accept it. She was still alive. He had to be alive, he just had to be.
"You don't know that!" she snapped, stomping towards him in anger. Merrill whispered her name under her breath. She could see it in both their faces. Merrill and Fenarel believed the shem, believed that Tamlen was lost.
"Just because the Keeper says he is a shem of high standing, does not mean you are allowed to give up when he says it's hopeless." she shouted at them.
Duncan raised an eyebrow at the common eleven slur for human, he crossed his arms in front of his chest impatiently. He actually had the nerve to be impatient with her, Ishafel fumed to herself. He was telling her to just give up on a friend, her best friend, her.. more-than-a-friend friend.
"Let me be very clear. There is nothing you can do for him. He's been tainted for three days now, unaided. Through your keeper's healing art and your own willpower you did not die. But Tamlen has no chance. Trust me when I say that he is gone. Now, we should return."
She glared at him, fire in her eyes "I'm not ready to give up the search just yet."
He sighed, "If you prefer, I can wait while you look around. But trust me when tell you he will not be here." He strode to the door, but turned when he reached it. "I suggest, however leaving sooner rather than later. You are sick, whether you feel it or not, and it does you no good to linger."
Even if she had not been sick, the search would have been exhausting. She left no stone unturned, no nook or cranny of the whole ruin undisturbed. Twice they found hidden rooms, but while they contained treasure, they did not contain Tamlen. It was the sheen of sweat and her rapidly paling face that forced Merrill to call off the search. She and Fenarel practically had to drag her back to the entrance. They returned to camp with Duncan in silence. Ishafel was practically shaking with rage. Nobody said anything until they were in the camp and the keeper approached them almost at a run.
"I'm relieved at your return! And I did not expect to see you again so soon, Duncan. Dare I ask of Tamlen? What did you find of him?"
"Nothing," Ishafel choked back a sob, she would not cry in front of the shemlen, "He's gone."
The color drained out of Keeper Marethari's face. "I see, Merrill, what about the mirror? Did you bring anything back?"
"I can answer that, Keeper, I destroyed it" Duncan interjected.
Keeper Marethari looked at him, incredulous. "I had planned to use it to find a cure for this illness. I trust you have a reason for these actions."
"There is much to discuss."
"Come then, let us talk privately in my aravel."
Merrill was sent to warn the hunters of the darkspawn. They walked together toward the group of hunter aravels. She placed a comforting hand on her friend's shoulder, but Ishafel brushed it off.
"I will see Hahren Paivel about preparing a service for Tamlen and...I will speak with Da'ben."
She was almost afraid of the conversation with Tamlen's father. How could she explain to the man his only son was dead because she had failed him?
"Ishafel, we all cared for Tamlen. You do not suffer alone" Merrill said quietly.
"It was my fault, Merrill. I could have dragged him out of that cave before any of this occurred." she was sobbing now, and stopped for a moment to recover herself.
"No, you don't. How could you have known?" She carefully wrapped her friend in a hug. Ishafel was stiff in her arms. Belatedly, she remembered that the girl had never liked being touched.
Ishafel shook her off as they parted ways. For the first time in her life Merrill felt pity for her. She was the girl with no parents to call her own and who had been in more trouble than half the hunters combined in their lifetimes. She was always the first to calculate the positive, the silver lining in the worst situation. There had been no situation that could not be turned to good use. Seemingly important things had never caused her grief, not ever before had she seen her so sorrowful. Isha was the girl who always had a laugh and a smile to give, even at the worst of times. Seeing her like this was a sobering sight.
Da'ben was mute when Ishafel came to speak with him. Perhaps he had expected that the boy would not be found. Tamlen's mother had died when he was young. He had been all that his father had left of her. He did not protest her offer to go to the Hahren for him. She left uncertainly, half expecting him to call out to her as she left. Although she walked slowly, he did not. The service was prepared quickly. The Hahren was morose. The mood of the service appropriately somber. The entire clan gathered to hear the story of Tamlen's life and how he had met his end. Together they sang him back to the forest. The only surprise was that the keeper had delayed so long in coming. Towards the end of the ceremony Piavel and Ishafel could see them, still deep in conversation, coming toward the gathering.
"This gray warden? Is he a good man?" The Hahren asked, his appraising gaze on Duncan
"I honestly do not know, Hahren."
"What is it he stayed to talk about, I wonder? Perhaps, you should go ask."
Ishafel did not want to ask. The feeling of foreboding she had felt in the cave snuck it's dark tendrils into her heart again. She was not going to like whatever they had been talking about, the feeling assured her, she should just run the other way and find Tamlen. She took a moment to check her urges, why on earth would she want to run into the forest alone after a darkspawn attack of all things, and Tamlen...
Tamlen was gone. Even if there was a way to find him, she would not know where to start.
She coughed suddenly and the cough turned into hack that drew the attention of several people, the Keeper and Duncan included.
They walked over as the Hahren helped her steady herself.
"Your keeper and I have spoken and we have come to an arrangement that concerns you."
She coughed again, and this time felt her keeper's soothing healing magic shimmer around her. The cough immediately subsided. Duncan just continued as though nothing had happened.
"My order is in need of help, you are in need of a cure. When I leave I hope you will join me. You would make an excellent Grey Warden."
She fought back the urge to laugh. Her? A Grey Warden? Surely this was a joke?
"What does this have to do with my cure?" she remarked crossly.
"Everything, I'm afraid. The darkspawn taint courses through your veins. That you recovered at all is remarkable."
She could hear the puzzled admiration in his voice. He was not joking, then. He really wanted her to join The Wardens.
"Eventually, the taint will sicken and kill you, or worse. The Grey Wardens can prevent that, but it means joining us."
He was going to blackmail her? She looked at the Keeper for some kind of sign of indignation. She saw none. Ishafel did not like where this was going, not at all.
"Can't you just give me the cure?"
"The cure is only found by joining the Grey wardens. But this is not charity. We enlist only the worthy and you have certainly proven yourself."
Rage bubbled inside her. Had she been considering it, what he said next would have made her say no instantly anyway.
"Should you join it is unlikely that you'll ever be able to return here."
That did it.
"I would rather take my chances, I refuse to go."
Marethari just shook her head sadly. "Long ago the Dalish agreed to aid the grey wardens against a Blight, should that day arrive. We must honor that agreement."
"Keeper," she could not keep the pleading out of her voice. Marethari put Ishafel's hand on her shoulder, her eyes were suspiciously bright.
"It breaks my heart to send you away, as it would to watch you die slowly from this sickness. This is your duty, and your salvation."
"This is my home! This is all I've ever known!"
"A home that darkspawn may tear apart. This way you can find a cure and protect your clan. Have courage."
His voice sounded almost reassuring, but it was tinted with something else that she decided was annoyance. Duncan was clearly annoyed by her resistance. She did not know how he thought being parted from everything she had ever cared about and being told she would never see any of it again could be considered an honor.
Ishafel was openly crying now, something she had not done since she was very young. Hot tracks of tears ran down her cheeks. Keeper Marethari was also crying, she pulled Ishafel into a tight hug.
"I cannot express my sadness at sending one of our daughters into such danger, away from the clan that loves her. But if this is what the creators intend for you, Da'len, meet your destiny with your head held high. No matter where you go, you are Dalish. Never forget that."
Ishafel wiped the tears from her eyes. "If this is my duty, then I will go."
Duncan seemed pleased, he also seemed to have completely overlooked the fact that the two elves were in tears over the decision. Ishafel thought it must be because he considered what he was offering to be such an honor. She suddenly realized that she could very easily hate this shem, despite what the keeper had often said about not judging others by their race.
"I welcome you to the order. It is rare to have a Dalish among us, but they have always served with distinction. So are you ready to go?"
For the first time, Keeper Marethari shot Duncan a look, and unlike the granite resistance he had to Ishafel's glares, he immediately backed off. The Keeper motioned to the rest of the clan. "Come then, Da'len, before the creators guide you from us, let your clan embrace you one last time."
Most of the clan was horrified at what Marethari told them. Several of the hunters outright protested, saying the Duncan could be pulling a shem trick. Ishafel hugged each and every one of her clanmates, lingering the longest on Ashalle, the woman who had stepped in for her mother when she had disappeared into the moonlight. She dropped an amulet around Ishafel's neck, it was wood and silver, carved intricately with symbols of wolves and the forest. "It was your mother's, may the creators keep you safe, Isha." then the elderly elf burst into sobs and it was all Ishafel could do to pull herself away. Ilen gave her a new bow to make a history for. She made Merrill promise to keep an eye on Fenarel. As she turned to go with Duncan, one final elf distinguished himself from the general crowd of well wishers. Da'ben. The look he gave Ishafel was that of someone still grappling to except that all their hopes and expectations had been irrevocably shattered. She still did not know what she could say to him. Thankfully, he did most of the speaking.
"Tamlen would want you to have this, Isha. He meant to give it to you when he asked you to bond with him, I know he would want you to have it still."
It was a beautiful dagger, the hilt carved with ancient symbols of luck, safety and good fortune.
"I-Thank you." She said to his back as Da'ben disappeared into the crowd. It was with a heavy heart that she left her clan. She turned back, just once, to look at the ridge that she had come from. Both Merrill and Fenarel stood there. Merrill lifted one hand in silent farewell. She nodded, and then they were gone.
Duncan watched the girl very carefully over the next few days. The taint was spreading. Not only could he feel it, but he could not help but see she was getting paler. She slept fitfully when she slept at all. The plan was fairly simple, they would continue on to the town of Rosings, a small settlement on the edge of the forest. Duncan had left instructions for any important missives to be left for him at the inn there. Hopefully there would be nothing pressing and they could continue on to Ostagar with all due haste. Perhaps it was her illness that made her quiet, but he doubted it. Ishafel had said only a handful of words to him after leaving her clan, He had tried to be as accommodating as possible, explaining some of what her duties as a warden might be and the situation at Ostagar, but she had absorbed all of it in silence. For two days, she continued as such until they reached Rosings. The town was small and not impressive for Duncan at all, but Ishafel's eyes nearly popped out of her head. In short acerbic sentences, she began to ask him questions "What is the purpose of this?" and "What is that for". They even managed to have a small conversation about the village chantry without Ishafel attempting to glare at him. He cut the walk around the town short when it became clear that Ishafel was pushing herself to keep walking.
The Rose and Thorn was a clean, well kept inn that was also the town watering hole. Duncan watched the townspeople carefully for their reaction to a dalish in the midsts. Despite being rallied against the dalish a few days ago, it seemed that nobody recognized dalish armor. They thought Ishafel just another alienage elf. The bartender greeted him with pleasure and Duncan introduced Ishafel as another Warden. She was surprised by the courtesy the man showed her, but Ducan was even more surprised when she returned it in kind. They were shown to two rooms across the hall from each other. Before leaving the innkeeper handed Duncan a hefty sheaf of papers. Much had happened while he was gone, it seemed. Ishafel retired to her room without a word and Duncan went to catch up on his work. It was several hours later when there was a soft knock on his door and a serving girl came in, bearing two plates of food.
"Henrick says it's on the house, ser" her voice was slightly accented and it took Duncan a moment to catch the words. She placed the first plate on the desk and the second on a small table next to the couch.
"I tried to give your friend hers, but she told me she wasn't hungry. Begging your pardon sir, but she looks quite ill. Maybe you could talk into eating some? the food's quite good, and I'm not just saying that neither. It'll help her keep up her strength. If she needs something lighter, just let me know. Melly and I can make her a good broth, it's no trouble." The girl smiled slightly.
"Thank you, you are most kind. I'll see to it that she takes care of herself."
The girl curtseyed and left. Duncan took the plate of food and knocked on Ishafel's door quietly. There was no reply.
"Ishafel?"
"It is open, Duncan."
She sat at her desk with her head in her hands, she looked up at him. Her eyes were red rimmed, almost crimson on her taint paled skin, and it was very clear she had been crying. He pulled up a chair next to her. She just continued to look at him, almost unseeing.
"How are you feeling?" he ask gently.
Duncan was familiar with loss, more so than he ever wanted to be. It was loss that had brought him to the wardens in the first place. Letting it out, letting grief bleed away was the only was to recover. He had not had an unchecked taint sapping his health while he grieved though. The two together might just have the power to kill. She certainly looked as though she was getting worse. Although her skin showed no blackness that would signal the change into darkspawn, her eyes were a shade lighter and it was apparent she was still unable to sleep.
"Tired, but there are nightmares. I don't want to sleep if I have to dream that."
He placed the food in front of her, the hot steam curled into her face. "You have it much harder than those who normally join. I do not think we have had a case like this before. Normally, the nightmares come after. You should eat, it will keep you strong and strength is the key to survival."
She stared at the food blankly. Reaching, Duncan tried a different approach.
"Your friend, Tamlen, would not want you to die this way. Your people would not want you to go down without a fight. Keep yourself strong and I promise you you will have the chance to avenge what you have lost."
"You don't have to do that." She gave him a harsh look the was a poor remnant of the fire scorching glares that she gave him when they first met. She was failing, and soon would be past the point where he could save her.
"Still, you have my word."
She rolled her eyes at him and grumbled something that he almost didn't catch.
"It just hurts to chew, and the food doesn't taste right."
Duncan sent down to the kitchen for that good broth the maid had promised almost immediately.
"We are only a few days away, we will start the ritual as soon as we get there. Stay strong."
"The nightmares will stay?" She asked him searchingly. He had not told her much of the ritual that was to save her life, apparently it was a secret.
"The nightmares you will have for the rest of your life." She shuddered. Creators, hopefully it got easier with age.
"As a warden, you will always fight the darkspawn. If they do not come to you, you will go to them. The taint in our bodies is a constant reminder of that. Fight your taint as though it were the darkness that took your friend."
Her eyes flickered slightly, and Duncan could tell with growing satisfaction that he was getting through to her. With steady defiance, Ishafel stuck the spoon into the rice before her and then shoved it into her mouth. She did this as the maid entered with the broth. "That's the spirit, miss, you'll be better in no time with an attitude like that, you will."
The next morning Duncan was surprised to find that Ishafel was dressed and outside before him. She met him with a tight smile.
"Where are we headed now?" She asked him.
"East and then south to the Kocari wilds. It will not take more than two days or so."
"Duncan,"
"Yes?"
"Thank you, for last night"
He nodded in acknowledgment, and gave very slight smile that was hidden by his beard
"You are welcome."
The song was intense, it echoed through his skull. The space was dark, as always. Very faintly Duncan could begin to make out words. The archdemon was calling, calling him to... There was a creature ahead of him in the darkness. The blackness reached out to engulf it, skin white against the black. Not a darkspawn then. He called out and the figure turned. Ishafel. She looked at him, amber eyes wide in fear, and the darkness swallowed her whole. Duncan woke up drenched in sweat. The fire was still burning, and though she was suppose to be standing watch Ishafel laid curled beside it.
Her face was twisted in pain. Duncan reacted swiftly, he grabbed her shoulder and shook,
"Ishafel. Ishafel, wake up."
She mumbled slightly, and although she had been perilously close to the fire she was cold to the touch and sweating. Duncan's mind raced, he was not going to let her die, not after all this. He would give her a chance to fight, as he had promised. The circle tower was only a few hours from here, if he started now he might make it before sunrise. He packed a quickly as possible and tossed her onto his back.
"Please, hold on" he whispered to her.
He started for the tower at a dead run.