Note: Be warned, now the real angst and cliffies begin... XD
That's what Snappygirl asked for, so you got it girl ^^
Matt's eyes glowed with this something again. Mello stared into these blue orbs, waiting for the moment they would return to their usual softness. He found himself on his back, on the bed, still searching for something to reassure him in Matt's gaze, as the redhead hovered above him, but he couldn't find it.
His heart was pounding so hard in his chest that it resounded in his ears, and he could almost feel his chest jump in rhythm with the loud thuds, and would have believed his ribs would pop out under the stomping of the organ if Matt hadn't been totally unphased as he nipped and licked his torso, pinning him once again so completely that the blond was helplessly trapped between the mattress and Matt.
Both's clothes quickly scattered beside the bed as Matt moved on Mello like a snake encircling a rodent. Mello kept on trying to catch a glimpse of something reassuring in his boyfriend's eyes, but Matt was all over him, never allowing their eyes to meet, as he caressed, kissed and groped the blond's body religiously.
If the attention Matt was giving him hadn't held so much of a worship, Mello would have been really scared. But in the middle of this dominating wave, Mello knew he was only drowning in love and care. As disturbingly possessive as Matt's actions were, needy and desperate, and the roughness so far from his temper, Mello felt loved beyond words, treasured, almost venerated.
So he let himself fit the role of the marionette, as the redhead crawled up, left hand sliding under the blond's head, fingers entangling in the golden locks, to kiss along his cheek, his jawline, to end in his neck, Mello only tilting his head to give him better access.
Mello felt Matt's teeth rack against his skin. He moaned in pleasure as he felt a finger probe his entrance at the same time.
The pressure of Matt's teeth grew with every finger he pushed in Mello. The blond's shoulder began to hurt, but it was still a good kind of pain, and the redhead's fingers curling to meet his sweet spot made the overall feeling amazing.
Mello would have squirmed of pleasure if he had been able to move, but Matt had such a grip on him that he could only moan, his muscles regularly tensing in delight under the ministrations. With the redhead's jaw firmly making a claw trap on his shoulder bone, nerves sometimes rolling with a borderline pain under teeth each time Matt moved, Mello felt like being mated to some kind of feline in a jungle of copper lianas.
Mello had almost reached his peak. Matt's extended forearm, to get his hand between Mello's legs, had been massaging his hard on all along the preparation, and Mello could feel the tension in his lower abdomen, telling himself he wouldn't last much longer.
But Matt withdrew his digits and pushed himself inside of Mello's tight hole in one hard thrust, biting his shoulder violently.
"AH! Matt!" Mello whimpered, painfully surprised. Was Matt taking revenge for the time Mello had bitten him?
Quickening his pace, Matt pounded Mello into the mattress, kissing him where he just had bitten him.
Mello, unable to hold on any longer, came hard, the friction of Matt's stomach on his erection combined to the penetration quickly finishing the job and sending him through the roof.
It's only when Mello came down from his high that he realised that Matt was silent.
Still thrusting into him, his forehead on his shoulder, holding him so tight Mello could hardly breathe, but silent, barely panting.
"Matt." Mello whispered, trying to get his lover's attention. Matt's thrusts stopped, but he didn't move from his spot.
"Matt?" he called again. Then he heard them. Muffled sobs. He had wondered how Matt's forehead could produce so much sweat, a few seconds ago, as he felt his shoulder dampen quite a lot.
Matt had been crying for long minutes, but why?
"Hey... hey sweetheart... shhhh, tell me what's wrong..." Mello murmured, his hands reaching for Matt's copper locks to stroke them.
Matt's hands slapped them away, capturing them in one above the blond's head as he lifted the upper side of his body to meet Mello's face, resuming his thrusts, harder every time, tears still running on his cheeks, falling on his boyfriend's face.
The redhead's look was penetrating, eager, so directly diving into his that Mello felt even more naked than he already was. Depossessed of his own existence as he suddenly felt like being swallowed into something he had no control over, something that made him a part of something rather than a fully free being.
Matt came, his groans ending in heartbreaking sobs, his eyes never leaving Mello's, pouring tears, pain, frustration, the emotions dancing like a play for Mello's eyes to witness, and then, softness, back from the dead, as Matt lent to kiss him so tenderly Mello didn't know whose tears were wetting his face anymore as he was finally allowed to hold the redhead snuggling closer to him.
Mello was pestering against his men. None of them had had the intelligence to call him to tell him the job was done, so he didn't have to do it himself. So much for wanting promotion from the new boss, those stupid thugs had made sure to do extras, but none of them had thought about actually telling him it's been done and he could just stay at home.
So he had left Matt and his puppy look a little earlier for nothing.
This whole bunch of retards had been up for a little punition, just to make sure they knew that the boss never gets tender about that kind of attentions if even the tiniest of things gets fucked up along the way. A few knees were shot in the process, as a little reminder of the boss' seriousness.
Mello had become the boss of this branch too quickly to some of his men's likings, killing the actual leader instead of trying to gain his trust and power step by step. Mello was not one for patience, and he knew that this move had been double sided.
The fear inspired by an effeminate blond that looked more like an angel than a murderer and didn't care about taking the risk of putting the whole mob on his back talked in his favour. If the new boss had been self assured enough to risk a backfire, then he was either stupid or extremely dangerous.
Mello had taken the right amount of time to prove he was all but stupid, thus the backfire had been immediately smouldered to a burning light of respect in most of the ones that were now his men's eyes.
But it also meant that among the Mafia, some greedy thugs would think they could equal Mello's genius and steal the spot the same way he did. A few painful deaths later, in the middle of the hideout for all of his crew to witness, and the chaff was winnowed from the grain. Some even trembled under their new boss' gaze, as his eyes surveyed, as a warning, the men still standing among the corpses bleeding on the concrete.
Still seething, he roared his motorbike back to life and left the hideout.
Matt was pacing back and forth in the living room, unable to focus on his games. Mello would be there in less than two hours, maybe even earlier. He knew he should be happy about it, he hadn't seen Mello that much since... well, since they began dating each other. No... it was even before that.
Mello had regular shifts when they had moved in here, things had only started to get hectic a few days later.
And then the ballet of negative thoughts started the show again...
"Maybe he met someone at work and came back later because he was spending time with him... or her..." he murmured to himself, finally letting himself fall on the couch, lighting a cigarette., "No... we weren't dating, so there was no reason he wouldn't have told me he met someone... but still... why coming home so late? And his leather... at the end of the day, it looks like he wore it all day long, but he can't wear that as a waiter, they wouldn't allow it where he works, it's not the style of the place... did he find another job? He would have told me... oh fuck I'm going insane..."
Shaking his head, he crushed the butt of his cigarette in the ashtray on the coffee table, and lit another one.
The smell of his own cigarette reminded him the scent of smoke on Mello when he came back home. Well, it was normal that his leather and skin caught the smell in a bar. Nothing to be alarmed with. The leather even kept the smell after being dry cleaned because of Matt smoking a lot in the apartment.
Suddenly, something came back to his mind. Another smell. What was the one he had sniffed on Mello, that he was unable to place although he knew it?
A second guess later and he knew that among smoke, shampoo, chocolate and leather scents, it was the smell of gunpowder that he had met. He knew it all too well, as it sent him back to his childhood and the policemen shooting his parent's murderer to death, as himself was being assaulted savagely on the tiny bathroom's tiles. He still could smell blood mixing with gunpowder.
But why would Mello smell of gunpowder? No matter how much he thought about it, there was no reason coming to his mind. He would just ask Mello, after all, the blond had no reason to lie to him.
The lock clicking open stirred him from his mind wanderings, and he jumped on his feet at the sight of his boyfriend in the doorframe.
"Mello! You've been quick!"
Mello had only the time to throw his keys on the nearby furniture that Matt was already giving him a bear hug.
"What I had to do was already done when I arrived, they forgot to call me to tell me."
"So you're all mine now!" Matt was slobbering him all over with kisses and Mello felt like being licked by a faithful puppy.
But Matt stopped as fast as he had begun, smelling gunpowder on Mello again.
"Mello, why do you smell of gunpowder?" he asked bluntly.
"You're sniffing me again Matt." Mello scolded him, glaring at his boyfriend in reprobation.
"I'm not, you just reek of that smell, I can't ignore it." Matt frowned at the accusation.
"We use gunpowder for drinks where I work, in one of our cocktails..." Mello knew he had to lie, and sound convincing, "I had one before leaving, that's why."
He seemed convincing enough for Matt smiled and kissed him. "But isn't it bad for your stomach to swallow that?" he asked genuinely.
Mello laughed, relieved. "My stomach is coated with chocolate, nothing can happen."
"I'm sure it's called a Molotov." Matt chuckled, "It would totally fit."
"Yeah." Mello didn't want to linger on the topic, "What about ordering pizzas and you show me those new games? I don't even know what more this new console does than the ones you already have."
Matt beamed, nodding enthusiastically. Anything to make Matt happy...
It's been three days that Matt radiated happiness. The smile on his face never left his lips, from the moment he woke up in Mello's arms to the moment he fell asleep after Mello made love to him, sweetly, gently, tenderly. Mello was sure he had even seen Matt smile in his sleep.
The blond had barely called his men from time to time, making sure everything was ok, but stayed at home, with Matt, as long as he wasn't needed in person at his hideout.
His phone rang as he was having breakfast at the kitchen's counter with Matt and the pile of pancakes the redhead had lovingly prepared.
When Mello had called him Mattie-housewife, he hadn't guessed that his boyfriend would take this role so seriously. The apartment was squeaky clean everyday, the bed made as soon as they left it, the dishes had barely time to sit in the sink, they were immediately washed, dried and put away, the fridge was always full and the meals had never been so balanced and tasty.
Mello didn't complain, it was weird, but pleasant, and he even got a back massage from time to time, and his bath prepared with lots of chocolate bubbles every evening.
Mello listened to his interlocutor, frowned and ended the call by a simple 'ok'.
Matt looked at him inquisitively, still munching his pancakes.
"I have to go to work today..."
Mello thought that after three full days, Matt wouldn't be too sad to let him go for a few hours, but the look in his boyfriend's eyes told him otherwise. "Come on, you know I need to go to my workplace from time to time, it's not as bad as before, I'll be back tonight, maybe even earlier, I just have some furnisher to meet." he lied, caressing Matt's cheek.
"I know... it's just that I got used to be with you all the time, I like it..." Matt breathed not to cry. It was stupid. Of course Mello would leave the apartment from time to time, and he should already be happy that he didn't have to leave everyday, but still, it hurt.
"I know sweetheart. Listen, I'll call you when I'm over and we'll eat out, we can even go to this restaurant you like so much, ok?" What could he do to appease the pain in his lover's eyes? It was starting to pinch at his guilt and he didn't like it at all.
"Ok..." Matt smiled weakly.
Mello finished his pancakes and left after kissing Matt deeply.
"One day I'll have to tell him the truth, I can't lie to him this way..." he mumbled as he climbed on his motorbike in the parking lot, looking up through his helmet at their apartment's window, where Matt was waving at him. "God, I love him so much... I'll tell him everything when I'm back."
His chin resting in his palm, his elbow on the desk, Matt was absentmindedly surfing through the internet. He had cleaned the mess from the pancakes, taken a shower, vacuumed the apartment although it didn't need to be, played and finished one of his games, and didn't feel like playing anymore, so after deciding there was nothing good on tv, he finally settled in front of the brand new laptop Mello had bought him the day before.
He wanted to offer something to Mello, but didn't know what, and was trying to find ideas on online shops.
Then he came to the realisation that since he had no job anymore, he had no money he'd earnt himself, and you don't offer something to someone with their own money...
Plugging different wires and connecting some of his older laptops and servers to the newest one, he then installed many softwares, some of them he had created himself for fun. It was time to see if they could be of any practical use, instead of staying theoretical.
Hours passed, and Matt was still focused so deeply on his screen that he didn't notice it was already half past ten in the evening. The sun was long gone and the redhead was working in the dark, the only light coming from his screens.
"Got it!" he smirked, when he finally managed to enter the system of a bank he'd been trying to hack into since the beginning of the afternoon. He didn't think it would be that easy. Making sure to erase his tracks, he closed the connexion, sighing happily at the thought of the five hundred pounds now filling his own account. He had started small, it was no need to be greedy until he was sure there was no risk. He doubted there was any, but he had preferred to be careful anyway. They didn't have his real name after all, the account had been created with fake identity and files a few minutes earlier. Mister Mario Link had now enough money to offer a present to his lover. Would Mello be Sonic Zelda? Matt chuckled, it sounded good.
Stirring, he glanced at the clock, remembering the battery was dead. Reopening his laptop's screen, he almost screamed when he saw the digital numbers.
Panicked, he grabbed his cellphone. Maybe he had missed Mello's call? Please no, not that! But the small screen was blank, no one had called him. He verified his text messages and vocal messaging, but they were empty as well.
Trembling, he selected Mello's number in the list and waited. It rang once, twice, several times... and then came the answering machine.
"Mello, I'm worried, you didn't call and it's really late, it's ok if you're still working but please call me, just so I know everything's ok..." Matt tried to keep his voice firm but he knew he had failed.
He had to stay calm, Mello would call back soon.
One hour later, and a full ashtray unable to contain the many butts of Matt's anxious wait, the redhead was still sat at his desk, his stomach twisted in panic.
He had tried to call Mello umpteen times, unable to leave anymore messages as he had filled Mello's answering machine with more and more of his trembling voice.
"Mello... please, don't do that to me..." he murmured, unable to retain the tears anymore...