Author's Note: I don't own the Marvel or their characters.
xxxx
Before Bruce had a chance to call Tony, Tony called to tell him, "Worthington's lawyers had told him he couldn't sue me for damages done by a mentally ill person I dropped off at his place of business. It didn't matter that it was well-documented that I paid for and supervised your therapy. If you didn't know you were going to get upset then how could I know. But, mostly, the lawyers didn't want it getting out that you, probably, became angry because Worthington was keeping a minor child in a prison cell. A minor child being held in Alcatraz is very bad. Therefore, Worthington's lawyers told him to take the loss."
Bruce was laughing his ass off by now.
"I understand that you're happy that you don't have to appear in court," said Tony. "But it isn't that funny."
"I call it a medical condition," Bruce said between giggles. "But you make it sound like I got a bit upset and kicked a computer or ripped up some important papers. The Hulk trashed a building for the gods' sakes."
"Still not that funny," said Tony.
"My wife left me," said Bruce. "According to Jane and Thor, she's back with the Warriors Three and sleeping with Volstagg - a friends with benefits thing. She doesn't want to see me, again. Thus, I'm stoned."
"You can't solve anything with drugs. You're talking to a recovering alcoholic."
"I used to be able to go over a year without an incident. Two years if you don't count me swallowing a bullet as a real incident. I'm used to the medication. I had a incident because Sif didn't stay in her bed when she was on bed-rest, so after hearing about Sif and Volstagg, I took a bit more medicine that I usually do. It's fine."
"Are you OK with this?"
"I'm happy." Bruce giggled. "Happiness from a pill is as real to the intoxicated mind as happiness from bio-chemicals."
"You're stoned."
"Tomorrow, I'll go back to my normal level of medication. The same healing that keeps my body from being injured by the high level of drugs in my system also keeps me from building up a tolerance. So every day, it's like I'm taking my medication for the first time."
"Then you can quit."
"When you drink, you cause kidney and liver damage. I'm not hurting myself and I'm keeping the world safe from the Hulk. It's a win-win."
"How does Susanne feel about the medication?"
"She wants me on the lowest dose I can take and be Hulk-free."
"Letting the Hulk out would be more therapeutic than numbing yourself."
"I did that soon after Jane told me the news and Thor confirmed it. I felt good right after I let the Hulk out, but the anger came back. The Hulk can level a city. Using the danger room isn't totally safe because the Hulk could break a wall. Me being duped up is safer for everyone." Professor X had alarms that would notify everyone that the Hulk had escaped. And the Hulk liked Logan and Hank, but it could still get messy.
"But you aren't dealing."
"I'm doing the best I can at the moment."
"I expect better from you." Tony said. "I'm coming out there. What's the point of being Ironman if you can't use the suit to visit friends in crisis? Just you and me."
"Did you destroy all the off-site files?"
"All the off-site files on the anti-mutant vaccine are gone," said Tony. "We destroyed every computer, vial, test tube or beaker he had in the lab. Fury is worried enough about the mutant/anti-mutant problem that he feels you being at that school is more important than you being an Avenger. Just so you know, Fury has files on your friend Logan."
"And?" Bruce asked.
"Fury didn't know about the amnesia and always wondered why Logan fell off the map," said Tony. "According to Fury, Logan is one of the good guys."
The doorbell rang.
"Someone is at the door," said Bruce. "Storm, Hank or Logan will get it. Cyclops went off to look for Jean and hasn't been back. Then Professor X went off to look for him or something. The Professor talks to Storm. I'm just the substitute teacher."
"We can talk more face-to-face," Tony said. "See you in a few, Big Guy."
"Bye," Bruce said as the call disconnected.
xxxx
Mr. and Mrs. Pryde were in the living room, yelling at their daughter.
"I need to stay here and watch Dagmar for Dr. Banner," Kitty yelled back.
"Is he paying you?" asked Mrs. Pryde.
Bruce walked over to them. "I can. How does a 150 dollars a week sound?"
"Wonderful," said Kitty.
"Then you're Dagmar's new nanny. We'll fill out the paperwork and I'll get you a check for your back-pay." Since Bruce had money from the sales of his superconductor, he wasn't exactly a broke teacher. Now that Worthington Labs wasn't suing him, he could use some of his money to hire a nanny if he chose. When the school year started, Kitty would need to be in class, so this was strictly a summer job.
Terry Pryde, Kitty's mother, said, "You can't hire our 16 year old daughter to be your nanny."
Bruce smiled at her. "Kitty turned me down when I asked her to be my nanny, but she has been helping to watch my four month old since my wife left me." Bruce picked up Dagmar to give her a hug. "Daddy will be back." Then he put the baby back on her baby gym and playmat.
"That baby isn't four months old," said Terry Pryde.
"I'm a mutant; thus, my baby is a mutant," said Bruce.
"Kitty didn't get her mutant power until she was 13," said Carmen Pryde, Kitty's father.
"Dag doesn't appear to have any mutant power at this time; she's just mature for her age." Bruce looked at his four month old daughter sitting without assistance, spinning a wheel. "She probably won't get her power until puberty."
"What is your mutant power?" asked Carmen.
Bruce sat down near his daughter.
"You're stoned and you hired our teenage daughter to watch your child," said Carmen. "We have the right to know."
"I'm stoned because my wife left me and I just learned she's having an affair. You much rather have me stoned than angry." Bruce kissed Dag's forehead then got up and headed to his room. After putting together some paperwork using his computer then hitting the print button, he took his checkbook from his drawer and collected the paperwork then headed back to the living room. "And I'm not that stoned since I can still put together legal documents. I need your social security card."
Kitty gave Bruce her social security card.
Bruce took it back to his room to photocopy it then he returned it to Kitty. Then Bruce and Kitty filled out the paperwork while her parents watched. "Here's a check for 300 dollars that will cover your first two weeks."
Kitty looked at the check in her hands. "My first paycheck."
"Don't spend it all in one place," teased Bruce. "The next check will be a bit less because all the taxes will be taken out. Mr. Pryde, you and your wife must know why you rather have me stoned than angry. My name was mentioned on the CNN when they reported that Worthington Laboratories was a pile of rumble." No causalities. The Hulk had kept his head enough to smash the smaller items until everyone left the building.
Mrs. Pryde looked at the man with the slightly glossed-over eyes, competing the paperwork he had her daughter sign. "Oh my God." Then she whispered something to her husband.
Kitty folded the check and put it in her pocket.
"Summer job will teach her responsibility," said Mrs. Pryde.
Bruce looked over the working papers. "Mr. or Mrs. Pryde, one of you needs to sign here."
Mrs. Pryde signed the paper. "What is BannerTech?"
"Pepper Potts said it would be easier for Stark Industries if I was incorporated. Ms. Potts did the paperwork. I hold the patent for the first and presently only room temperature superconductor," said Bruce. "Since I already have a company, it wasn't all that difficult to make Kitty my employee."
Kitty kissed her mother's cheek. "Thanks, Mom."
Terry Pryde asked, "Dr. Banner, did CNN ask you to tell your side?"
"Yes, but I'm nervous about the cameras," said Bruce. "My friend is coming over, and he knows more about PR than I ever will. We can all go out for a nice dinner somewhere since he has plenty of disposable income. I'll be more alert by dinner."
"Is more alert a good thing?" asked Mr. Pryde.
"If I don't think about my wife being with that no-good muscle-bound jerk when she should be here taking care of our daughter, I'll be fine." Bruce smiled, enjoying the drugs. He blamed Sif. He liked Volstagg; he was a good man. "See, Kitty, no green in my eyes. I'm going to sleep it off."
Bruce scanned in the paperwork then he kicked off his shoes, curled up in bed and went to sleep to be woken by a knock on his bedroom door.